Title: Isaac Clarke finds Pyro Goggles

Premise: Dead Space, TF2. Isaac Clarke is hiding from the necromorphs when he finds something to help him overlook his fear. Humor, crack.

Personal Comments: Just an idea that came to me at lunch when I was talking about TF2 and pyros with my buddy at lunch today. We started discussing what a crossover between the former and Dead Space would be like. I actually looked here, and I'm frankly surprised nobody's written an actual crossover story between the two. At first, I thought of maybe the nine guys fighting off a necromorph attack, but then my buddy brought this up.

We also talked a lot about Meet the Pyro (which I thought was freakin' hilarious), and how it can tie in to MLP. Oh, the fanfic ideas we came up with... a few dealing with the infamous MLP theory.

I freakin' love Dead Space! With it's heavy atmosphere and heart-racing gameplay, it's so freakin' scary! One of my favorite game series' of all time! Can't wait for Dead Space 3! Oh, and I like Isaac and Ellie together. There's a lot of characters we've met in the franchise that I've gotten attached to. Too bad so many of the good ones died :(.

Song is "C'mon Get Happy" by The Partridge Family. I do not own this song or these two games. I do not profit from this.

Isaac crouched down behind the crate. This was the best hiding spot he could afford. There weren't any out now, but he knew they would be back soon. Those monsters! They would be all over him. He was so goddamn sick of those things! He was sick of this goddamn ship, so dark and creepy!

He was on the verge of screaming, just to get out his frustration, when he spied a little green box just at his feet. He wondered what surprise this thing would have. He stomped on it and smashed it open, revealing a gas mask with a large pair of black goggle-like eyes.

Well, that sucks! It could have been ammo, food, credits! Anything! But no! It had to be a motherf*cking gas mask!

Well, might as well put them on. So Isaac took off his helmet, and put the mask on.

It was dark at first.

Pyro Vision Activated. Isaac heard a voice in his head, like he were wearing headphones.

Isaac was confused at first, until...

The darkness in his goggles faded, and the dark ship that he thought he was in suddenly transformed. All the metal and steel transformed. Now Isaac found himself in a land of green grass, blue skies. There were piles of candy growing from the ground too.

Hello world, there's a song that we're singing,

Come on Get Happy!

Wow, this is much better! Isaac thought. I think I'll keep this on!

So he stood up from his cover, and looked over. Down the peppermint trail, he saw a few necromorphs pop out. Only... they were different...

They were smiling. And their scythe-like claws were giant feathers. One approached Isaac, arms spread wide.

"Isaac!" He exclaimed. "C'mon! Give me a hug!"

A whole lotta lovin' is what we'll be bringing,

We'll make you happy!

Isaac looked down at his plasma cutter. It looked different. He aimed it at the happy necro, and pulled the trigger. Confecious sugar shot out from it and hit the necro's body. He started feeling the sugar off his body and licked himself, smiling in delight.

"Delicious!" He shouted. "Thanks, Isaac!"

Up ahead, Isaac saw another necromorph chasing one normal looking guy. The second guy was laughing. It was like they were playing tag.

At last, the Necromoph caught him in his feathers, and started tickling him. The guy started rolling around on the ground laughing.

Then the necro lay down his head lower, and blew the guy a raspberry on his neck.

The guy laughed so hard, at last he exploded, blowing confetti all over the place.

We had a dream we'd go travelin' together

And spread a little lovin' if we'll keep movin' on

Somethin' always happens whenever we're together

We get a happy feelin' when we're singin' a song

"Hey Isaac," Purred a new female voice.

Isaac turned his head to look at the voice. It was Ellie, almost naked right down to her underwear, showing off her attractive body. A smile on her face, she also held another candy shooter, aiming at another necro.

"Can you give me a hand with some of this?" She asked.

"Yep!" Isaac said outloud. "I am NEVER taking this mask off!"