I.

"There are two important things to remember when doing martial arts: breathing and foundation or your stance."

"Okay."

"First we'll focus on your breathing. The best way to breathe is to inhale with your mouth, making sure that you expand your stomach and diaphragm with every breath, hold it for a few seconds then exhaling through your nose. With every inhale and exhale, your body should remain loose and relaxed, understand?"

"Yes."

"Good. Now onto the different types of foundations or stances that martial arts uses. Your traditional Japanese martial arts – and some western ones – will typically use a wider stance for more stability and balance. However, there are certain martial arts that utilize a smaller stance for better speed and mobility – taekwondo and other Korean martial arts are a good example of this. For you, Kid, I'd recommend that we go with the latter stance since I highly doubt you're gonna grow up to be a big, buff guy or the like – which means we should focus on your speed, agility, and dexterity… you can't hit what you can't catch, after all!"

"O-Okay… how will we do that?"

"Well, first of all, you're gonna continuing with your running – what better way to get faster at moving than to actually fucking run? We're also gonna continue with the Super-Secret-Though-I-Guess-Not-Really ballet practice, you know, to further strengthen your legs and shit. Then I'm gonna start teaching you some stuff to increase your flexibility and footwork… I'm thinking yoga and some break-dancing, but I haven't really decided yet… Then we'll move into the actual martial arts training… I'm leaning towards teaching you aikido or the like since that type of martial arts focuses mainly on using your opponent's force and momentum against them and, like I said earlier, I'm pretty fucking positive that you aren't gonna grow up to be like a pro-wrestler or something, you know?"

"You don't know that for sure, Zero… I could become the biggest kid in school when I hit puberty!"

"Yeah, sure, and I'm gonna turn into a super hot teen idol tomorrow morning…"

"Y-You never know!"

"Whatever you say, Kid… just to let you know, though, I'm not holding my fucking breath over that ever happening."

II.

Tsuna's third year of elementary school passes in the blink of an eye and without any major incidents occurring, much to the delight of one brunet and much to the chagrin of the brunet's mental passenger.

"Tch… I guess your bullies have finally grown a fucking brain cell or two and realized that you aren't easy prey to pick on anymore… Goddamnit! I wanted you to show off all the cool martial arts shit that I taught you!"

"Zero… stop throwing a tantrum, please. Whining and complaining about things doesn't suit you."

"Aw, stuff it, Kid! Haven't you realized by now that 'whining' and 'complaining' is my thing?! Without it… who would I be?! I'll tell you who'd I'd be… I'd be just another boring voice in your head telling you what to do and how to do it! I'd practically be your fucking conscience!"

"Which you already do and kinda are anyway…"

"Yeah, but, aren't I a shit-ton cooler the way I am now?"

"Hahaha…! That you are, Zero."

III.

At the beginning of Tsuna's fourth year at Namimori Elementary School, he runs into Kyoko's infamous older brother.

Or rather, the infamous brother runs into him.

"EXTREME! You dodged my top-speed very EXTREMELY! Join my boxing club to the EXTREME!"

"My fucking god… I swear if this kid fucking screams at us, 'EXTREME!' one more time…"

"Sure, Sasagawa-sempai… I'll join your club!"

"Y-You will?! E-EXTREME!"

"…Okay… you just did that to fucking spite me, Kid… Not cool… Not cool at all…"

'I may have agreed just to get him to yell one more time… but, it's also because shouldn't I also be learning about other ways to defend myself? And, no offense to you, Zero, but having two… 'mentors' is better than one, right?'

"… I have taught you well, Young Grasshopper. Of course, it's to be expected what with me being awesomely amazing and incredibly skilled and knowledgeable to boot!"

IV.

And so, Tsuna officially joins Sasagawa Ryohei's Boxing Club – though, could it really be called a 'club' when there were only two members in it?

"Hey, Kid! Don't go forgetting about me, yeah?! This Club's got three people in it! Well… two kids and the amazing me – who doesn't have a physical body so I guess there are only two-and-a-half members? Can I be considered a 'person' if I don't have my own body? Or would it be better to just label me as a ghost or something? Or should I-"

"Zero, you're having another existential crisis…"

"… Two-and-a-fucking-half club members it is!"

I'm not really happy with how this chapter turned out, but that's what my brain spat out. Tsuna's will grow up to be a lot more snarky and sarcastic that in cannon – how could he not when he has a passenger like Zero in his head? – which is why there's such a big difference in how Tsuna talks in Parts I and II.

If you have any questions or comments please let me know!