Mothers Chapter 29

Old Feelings Die Hard

Author's Note: So, this story is coming to an end in the near future and I'm going to shift focus to Sins of the Past and The F in Pike to try and finish it. I also have a decision to make about the end of this story. I have something in mind but I'm not sure how open people are to it. I have an epilogue and a challenge for the end. I'm wondering if I should do both or just one.

Faith's POV

I can't believe she did this.

I take a bite of my Hawaiian slice as we watch the movie in Buffy's living room.

I can't believe she rented Lady and the Tramp. I haven't seen this movie in years. This movie is so great. I always loved the whole dogs falling in love thing. It's just so easy for them. They don't have to worry about vampires or demons or anything. They don't have to worry about the end of the world. That would be the life.

I take another bite of my pizza.

Not to mention, they don't have to worry about their mothers' apparently coming back from the dead. Why did she come back? What is she up to if she really is back? Is she even up to anything at all? I just don't know for sure.

I look over at B sitting next to me, watching the movie with a smile on her face.

It's nice to see her smile again. B said that all my mom asked about was how I'm doing. She just wanted to know if I was all right. Where's the evil plan in that? She wants to know about me. She cares about me enough to ask. Maybe there isn't an evil plan. Maybe all she said was true. Maybe all she wants is to get close to me and be family. If that's all she really wants, I might just have to give her a chance.

I go back to watching the movie as the music swells and Pidge and Butch make their way through the town. They stop at Tony's restaurant and that weirdo Italian guy who thinks dogs talk to him comes out. He gives them a table and orders them a plate of spaghetti. Butch and Pidge start eating their meal and those cooks start playing music. I finish off the slice in my hand and reach for another because I'm still hungry. Just as I grab the crust of the last slice of pizza I feel another hand on it. I look over at B and she's smiling at me.

"Did you want that B?"

She pulls her hand away and I'd swear she gets shy.

"Uh, kinda, but I chose the movie. You go ahead."

We look at each other for a second and smile.

"Tell you what, we'll split it."

I pick up the knife she brought out to cut any straggling cheese. I cut the pizza slice in half and hand one piece to B. Again our hands touch as she takes it from me. We smile at each other as we both take a bite of our halves. I set my piece down and after another bite, so does B. We go back to watching the movie. A few minutes pass and the dogs wake up the next morning, talking about responsibility and stuff. B slides a little closer to me on the couch.

"I love this movie."

"Yeah, it's a cool movie, kinda why I liked it so much as a kid."

"They have it so simple. Nothing really major getting in the way."

"Just them and the way they feel. I've always wondered what that's like."

Buffy gets a little closer, leaning against me. I put my arm around her and we sit here watching the movie.

"Must be nice..."

Her hand finds mine. Butch and Pidge walk through the city together on the screen.

It's kinda nice.

I suddenly feel hot breath on my neck. I turn my head to look at B, whose face is inches away from mine.

"B?"

She leans forward and our lips touch, we kiss softly. I move my body to face hers and she does the same. I use my arm to pull her closer to me, deepening our kiss. Buffy's hand goes to the back of my head and she half kneels on the couch, making me lean back and turn my head up to her as we start to make out. I lean back more as she pushes me forward with her free hand. Our bodies press together and I can feel every inch of her against me as I lie down. I push my hips into hers and feel her grind back.

God it's just like I remember it. I'd forgotten how good this feels. Why is it just like I remember? Why is this happening? How did this happen? What are we doing?

After a few more moments, she pulls away and looks down at me in shock.

"I'm sorry..."

She gets off me and the couch, turning away as she runs her hands through her hair.

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have done that."

I get up from the couch while she starts pacing back and forth in a panic.

"I'm not even sure why I did that."

"B, it's all right. It's not like we've never done it before."

"I-I know... but uh, you, you were right before. Neither of us is ready to jump into anything and... and if we follow what we were doing there, there'll be definite jumping."

She faces me, a look of confusion on her face.

"Okay, so then we won't jump. You're right... neither of us is ready for any kind of jumping. We should just hold off on the jumping. There's still a lot going on in both our lives right now. And I'm not even sure we should do any jumping even if we were ready to jump. Maybe we can put what happened a minute ago on hold until it's more or less sorted out."

Buffy kinda clams down a bit.

"Yeah, I think that's a good plan. It hasn't been that long since my mom died and I'm still recovering from it all. I can't just go getting involved with someone after everything that's happened. And I really like this whole friendship thing we have. It's really nice, the friend thing... and I don't want to do anything that would ruin it. I'm, I'm not ready for anything to change between us. I'm not even sure that I want anything to change."

I close the gap between us and put my hands on her shoulders, calming her down.

"I know B, neither am I... so we'll just hold off on the jumping until we're both ready, until we know whether we're even right for each other anymore. We'll just be friends. I don't want either of us to start hurting the other again. It really wouldn't be good. So... no jumping."

We look each other in the eyes for a few moments. She leans forward, pulling me into a hug which I return.

"Right... no jumping."

The movie plays in the background as we stand together in silence. Pulling apart after a few moments, we smile and then start moving back towards the couch. Just as I'm about to sit down she has an idea.

"Hey um how about some ice cream... since we're done with the pizza and all?"

"Uh, sure... I can get it if you like."

I straighten up to go to the kitchen and she puts a hand in front of me.

"No, don't worry. I got it."

Buffy makes her way toward the kitchen.

"Do you want me to pause the movie?"

Turning to walk backwards, she faces me.

"That's okay, it's not like I haven't seen it before a couple hundred times. Just sit down. I'll be back in a minute."

She disappears into the kitchen as I sit on the couch. I try and watch the movie, but my mind wanders back to a few minutes ago.

Where the heck did that come from? That was such a weird moment. I don't really know why I let it go that far. I didn't let it get that far after Joyce's funeral. Why did it happen this time? I mean, I know I'll always love B on some level. What we shared was really powerful and something like that doesn't just go away, but I thought we were both over these kinds of feelings. I guess not...

I glance towards the doorway to the kitchen.

But we do know that neither of us is ready to explore any of those feelings. Especially with everything that's going on with my mother coming back. I'm still not completely sure what I'm gonna do about that.

I hear bowls clanging in the kitchen, followed by the sounds of someone rummaging through utensils.

B would never lie to me about the things my mother said to her in the video store. So maybe my mother really does love me.

She comes in from the kitchen with a bowl of ice cream in each hand.

"You like Rocky Road right?"

Rocky Road?

"Yeah, I like it."

Buffy hands me one of the bowls and sits down on the other side of the couch.

"Thanks..."

She smiles at me but then turns her attention to the movie. We try and focus on the movie but it's hard. I catch B looking my way out of the corner of my eye. I eat a spoonful of my ice cream before she speaks.

"So... are you okay with what happened today?"

I look over at B and she's watching me.

"What happened?"

"Running into your mom at the video store and everything..."

Oh...

"Yeah, I mean it was a little weird running into her apparently out of the blue like that, but I guess it was okay. She really didn't ask about those vamps we dusted in Crestview?"

B scoops up some ice cream and eats it.

"Nope, just about you. She asked how you were doing and I told her you were doing fine. She's really hoping you'll talk to her you know."

I stare down at my ice cream.

"I know."

"She gave me her number and where she's staying if you wanna give her a call."

"Not yet, let's just see what Giles says tomorrow. Then, maybe..."

She smiles at me before looking down at her ice cream.

"Okay, if that's what you want. You know I'll support you in whatever you want to do."

"I know, and I appreciate it B."

Depending on what Giles says tomorrow, maybe...

End of Chapter 29