Chapter 7: We Hit the Road and the Tattoo Parlor

I need a distraction. Bad. But Bella actually did decide to go to college. C'mon Bells-you don't need to give in to him. You know. Ever. But she did so I'm stuck. And of course, because I'm stuck with nothing to do about Bella-it's all about Kelly. I shouldn't care. Not about her how her hair shines when we get a hint of sun. Not about the blue pools that can keep me glued in place. Not about the way she smiles or how she laughs. But I do. I freaking do and I can't make it stop.

October. November. The falling of the leaves, the crisp mornings, that's what she tells me anyway. Running this hot of a temp I don't feel it anymore. I remember it a little but not much. Part of me wishes I did. She wore more hoodies now and called me crazy for being fine shirtless. Not my fault though, wolf thing. Damn her smile when she threw some leaves at me...God she's beautiful. And I don't deserve her.

One day we sat on our tree. Ours because we're the two who claimed it. First beach, still calming. Well sort of. Now it was just the one place where I didn't see all the couples.

"So much for a rarity," I scoffed, "Everyone's practically a couple but us."

"It could be worse," she offered.

"How?" I asked, raising a brow.

"Give me a sec," she replied, "I'll think of something."

I jumped down, staring off into the waves. "Seth, Brady, Collin and Embry are the only ones who haven't but they still might. Especially Embry," I said, sighing, "since he's older. The others might still have a chance that they won't."

She jumped down, standing next to me. "So what's the whole deal with imprinting anyway?" she asked, "I mean I know it's not supposed to happen as often as it has around here but I guess I'm ...curious as to the specifics." She smiled and nudged me, "Still an overprotective older sister you know."

"Honestly," I chuckled then sighed, "I'm starting to wonder if everything we've ever been told has been right."

"Well then," she said, "Start there."

I turned to her. God did she have to look at me like that? Her eyes twinkled as she looked at me. Slowly I started to walk and she followed, stepping in stride next to me. I stared at the waves. "Imprinting...It's something special to our tribe, " I started, "At least it's supposed to be. The easiest way to think of it is just...finding someone," I glanced at her, "that one person you are meant to be with."

Those damn baby blues lit up when I said 'meant to be'. I swear they're starting to sparkle...Suddenly I felt..hotter but not like fire like...a glow. She's making me freaking glow. Crap.

"Everything changes...," I said, trying to keep it together, "...and instead of caring about yourself, all you can think about, care about is them. It's like," Oh god. She's gotta stop looking at me like that. "It's like they become your world and nothing else matters. They're your soulmate."

As I said it, I never felt her pull on me so strong. I know I shouldn't fight it but I have to. For Bella.

"Sounds a lot like just falling in love in general."

"What do I know," I chuckled, letting out a breath I had no idea I'd been holding, "I just…," I paused again, feeling that pull toward her again with every fiber of my being, "being around everyone like this and as a wolf having to see it. It's...disgusting."

And hella tempting to let go and tell her everything.

"I am so glad," she chuckled, "That I don't have to see the thoughts Leah has about my brother."

"You should be," I replied, gagging.

One big downside of wolf telepathy was that. Ugh.

"So...why exactly are you so against it?"

Shit. Why'd she have to ask that? It is a legit question. Why am I? Why don't I just give in to this happily-ever-after and -oh right.

"It doesn't feel like a choice for either person," I replied, "For me, it's my blood telling me who my perfect match is and I get no say," I said, pausing a sec, "For them they'd feel almost guilted into loving me because I'd give them all my attention. It's not fair."

It's not fair. Why can't the rest of them see it? Right-they don't have the same problem I do!

"You're afraid it's going to happen to you."

I met her eyes again, staring back, a scowl appearing on my face. Not that it will. It has.

She smiled, turning to look out at the waves. She hugged herself as she said, "I think it's kind of sweet. It's like...destiny. I would love to find out who I'm destined to be with….if there is someone that's meant to be with me that is."

My jaw dropped. I didn't expect that. Oh God. It's me. ME. You wouldn't want me, would you? I'm all sorts of messed up. Change your mind. Now.

She rolled her eyes at me, "So I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic, sue me."

She has no idea. No idea that her 'meant to be' is right here. Yup. This freaking mess. Us-you and me-we're apparently soulmates. God I want to tell her. Have her slap me and run away. Would she even? Run away? Or if I confess it all...would she accept it? Would she let me...kiss her? Crazy, that's crazy….right?

We walked and walked. I ended up holding her hand. I knew I shouldn't but I need to. I kept sneaking looks. Should I say it? No, you dummy. Yes. No. Yes. No. DAMN! Suddenly, I spotted a speck of something on her wrist I hadn't noticed. "What's that?" I asked.

"That?" she replied, "It's my tattoo. The Chinese symbol for love," she sighed, "I got it a little over a year ago for my birthday. It was...a present from my ex."

"Sorry," I said, "I didn't mean to bring up bad memories."

"Don't. You didn't." she smiled, "You wanna get out of here?

"Your house?"

"No I mean really out of here. Let's go somewhere. Anywhere. Port Angeles maybe. We can get away from the love-dovey couple-y stuff going on here and just have some fun. It's still early. The roads shouldn't be terrible and it's not that far," she paused, glancing up at me, "Please?"

I wasn't about to turn down a chance to get away but should I really keep spending so much time with her? I wasn't about to fight it. Not now. "I can finally get the Rabbit out for a spin," I grinned and she grinned back. We hurried back and sped out, jumping on the highway. Hands on the wheel, it felt good. Finally, a bit of a break. She shifted in her seat, facing me. Unexpectedly she said, "So now that I know Leah imprinted on Eric, you gonna tell me why you laughed so hard that day?"

"I laughed because I never thought she would," I chuckled, "You don't know how much of a relief it is. Thought, it'd be nice to not know all her thoughts about him."

"Speaking of that night...when I came in you were really pissed about something and you just talked to your dad...did he say something?"

I gritted my teeth. The night flew back into my mind. "Yeah," I replied, "He said something."

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

I glanced over at her for a second. You. It's always about you. "He told me to forget about Bella," I said, "That she's never coming back, never gonna pick me and so I should move on," I scoffed, "Basically, he thinks I should forget everything and ask you out."

We locked eyes for a minute then she sighed, looking out her window. "Why does everyone want us to date?"

I swallowed. She's been getting it too? Really? They had to guilt trip her? Can't they just leave us be?

"Well whatever. Parents are like that," she sighed, "At least you still have your dad. I really miss mine, even for stuff like that."

I took her hand. I had to. It's not easy losing a parent, much less both. She gave me a smile and we were quiet. Until the song came on and she sang. Her voice...it's not even just how I feel about her. She's good, really good.

"Really," I asked, "Lady Gaga?"

"Why not?" she grinned, "Besides I'm on the edge...of glory!"

We laughed though I almost had a heart attack when she rolled down her window and hung out the car. After I pulled on her arm to come back in she did. Laughing in her seat she squeezed my had to each 'with you'. I felt lighting shoot through me. Oh man. She's something. If I'm not careful...

Luckily we rolled into town before I thought any more about how she was making me feel.

"What do you want to do first?"

"Well," she said, ""You saw my tattoo and it got me thinking I want another one...for my parents."

"You sure?"

"Don't worry," she grinned, "You can handle the tattoo shop. I promise I'll fend off the biker dudes for you."

I laughed. She was good at making me do that.

"Never pictured you as the tattoo type," I said as we waited in back. Also not the 'meant-to-be-with-me' type either.

"I wasn't," she said, "at first. Now I like them. But I think they need to have meaning. I think everyone who gets one needs to remember that."

I gently took her wrist again, looking at the symbol, "I'm sure this one has meaning...or did."

"It still does," she replied, glancing at me, "I just haven't found it again," she sighed and chuckled, "I don't even know if I will. Then again, I don't know if I'm ready for it."

I gulped. Me either. I'm not. Or am I? But she shouldn't be afraid or think she won't have it again...I mean...she deserves it. She's amazing. She deserves to have someone love her, hold her, tell her she's beautiful…

"Maybe I should get a broken heart next to it…"

"Maybe we both should," I said, locking eyes with her. We're the same. Two people, both broken from the people we loved.

What a day. We walked, talked and got to know each other. As if we didn't already know a ton but now it's like...it's like I've known her forever. I've never felt this...close with a person. At least not a girl. I thought Bella and I were close but not like this. This felt...different. I didn't talk much on the way back. God this is all so crazy.

"Thanks...for today," she said as I pulled into her drive.

"I should be thanking you," I said, "I've been meaning to get the Rabbit out but never got the chance."

"In that case I say...you're welcome," she grinned.

We laughed and sat there for a few moments, just looking at each other. When she opened the door, it broke the trance. "See you tomorrow she said, before closing the door.

"Yeah."

She waved and hurried inside. I backed up but still caught sight of her in my rearview mirror. Oh no. This isn't good. I'm falling for her like freaking dominoes. I have to make it stop-to fight. But how?