After almost an entire year, here's an update. My apologies to anyone who has been following the story. I had a mishap with my old computer and lost all of my files. It's been tough starting from the ground up but I'm presenting to you an olive branch of sorts. Enjoy.
Avery clutched at the musky bedspread beneath her fingers, feeling the quilted fabric scratch between her fingers. It'd been hours since she returned to the seclusion of her hotel room. It still didn't seem real. After her rather unfortunate, vomit-covered experience at the clinic, she'd asked to pay her bill and hurried out. Dr. Usanagi had tried to persuade her to stay and run more tests, but Avery didn't need them. She knew what this meant.
Eight weeks ago, she remembered laying splayed out against the cavern floor, wrapped in furs, her skin glistening with sweat. She could recall the feel of his warmth as he encased her in an embrace; the way his rough lips traveled over her shoulders and across her collarbone. Every now and then he'd whisper her name, the hairs in her skin rising as it prickled in excitement, her body aching for him like nourishment.
It wasn't often that she'd give into such urges, maybe once or twice with King, but that night was different. Something had changed between them, like a perfectly carved puzzle piece slipping into place. What had started as a heated argument turned into a flurry of hurried kisses and a deep, primal need. She wanted to feel… feel him on her, above her, inside of her. She'd long grappled with whether or what had transpired between them had been appropriate but in the moment it didn't matter. The world had faded piece by piece until all that was left was him and her. No White Legs, no need to worry about the Sorrows, the Dead Horses, or Daniel hounding them. They could put all of that off for another day.
Avery let her eyes slide closed with a sigh. It was all right there before her, behind her tired lids and tucked neatly away in the furthest recesses of her mind. A private moment just for them. A small pocket of her existence where life seemed to bloom with potential, nourished by hope and an almost teenage infatuation. Now, as she trembled at the edge of her mattress, she found all of that hope snatched away from her. She felt a cold sensation grip her chest and she let out a shuddering breath.
How could she have been so irresponsible?
Sure, things happen. Even being safe wasn't completely fool proof. But she hadn't even tried. All reason went out the window and her lizard brain took its place—fueled only by desire. She laughed bitterly. How sad. The hero of the Mojave, taken out by one reckless night with a man who'd once been the biggest threat to the wasteland. She laughed again and again, unable to stop herself, letting the feeling bubble over like the fizz inside of a shaken soda bottle. But soon, her barking laughter turned to shuddering, full-bodied sobs. She lurched forward, wrapping her arms around herself as cried.
She wiped her face with the back of her hands, hiccupping as she tried to calm down. It was of no use. As soon as she'd calm down, the distressed feeling would reemerge and she'd find herself sobbing into the floorboards.
There were options for her. She knew that Dr. Usanagi would be able to alleviate her of the looming threat of parenthood. But there was a small flicker of doubt within her that seemed to overpower her reasoning. She placed an unsteady hand on her stomach and inhaled sharply. Did she really want this? The corners of her eyes stung as she fought back another wave of tears, her vision growing blurry. Avery would make a horrible mother, that much was certain. But she thought of Joshua.
She thought of his glassy blue orbs and the tufts of dark hair he hid underneath his bandages. Would their baby have his hair color? Would their baby have his dazzling eyes and her tan skin? Would their baby even get the chance to know their father? A frown tugged at her lips, her face creasing with worry. He was a noble man, despite his past. All she had to do was tell him of her condition and she was certain he'd be by her side. The only reason for their separation was because of Avery's sense of loyalty to the people of New Vegas. The decision to go back to their respective places was solely hers.
"I want you to stay."
She froze. "What?"
"I want you to stay here… in Zion," he stopped for a moment only to add, "with me."
She remembered the pleading tone in his voice and she squirmed in discomfort. A man so powerful with a reputation of cutting a bloody swath through the Mojave had been at her feet, practically begging her to stay. In that moment, all she wanted to do was throw her arms around him and bury her face into his flak jacket. Her damn pride had gotten the best of her, securing her in place and rendering her practically immovable.
"Think of the life you could have here," his raspy voice lulled her anger and put it to rest, only to be replaced by immense sorrow and regret. "Imagine the life we could have."
Avery pursed her lips.
It's not as if she could take another hiatus to resolve this issue. So much planning had gone into taking New Vegas back, into restoring its autonomy and squashing those who aimed to destroy it. She'd finally removed house and was working with Yes Man towards a final move on their proverbial chessboard. It was just like her to ruin it all. How could she continue to move forward? She couldn't hide her pregnancy from those close to her… not for long. She had a least another two months before the flat plane of her abdomen would start to swell with the growing life within. Maybe she could wear baggy clothes and avoid close to mid-range combat. She bit her bottom lip in thought. That wasn't too farfetched, right? No one would be suspicious if she took a more strategical stance. Only Boone would be the one to question her motives and he wasn't even around to challenge her anymore.
Knock
Knock
Knock
Avery nearly jumped out of her skin at the sudden noise. She flicked the screen of her pipboy and it washed her face in an eerie green glow. She squinted, checking the time. It was almost midnight. Who could possibly be bothering her? She groaned and stood from her spot, her legs aching as her aching muscles stretched. Idly, she wondered how she'd be able to clamber out of bed once she was further along. She knew swollen feet and ankles were a common occurrence and she already had bad knees. Christ. What had she gotten herself into?
Another series of impatient raps sounded from her door and she felt a flare of irritation, "I'm coming!"
She reached the door, letting her hand flutter over the doorknob. A wave of unease trickled down her spine and she hesitated for a moment, staring at the shadow cast by two feet underneath her door.
"Who is it?" She asked sharply.
"Who do you think it is?" A deep voice said from the other side. "Father Christmas?"
Avery quirked an eyebrow and cracked the door open. At once, she felt the blood drain from her face. A familiar pair of sunglasses and a surly face, weathered by years of sun and fighting, stared back at her.
"Boone?" At once, her mood soured, and she glared at him from the crack in the door. "I would've much preferred Father Christmas, thank you."
She went to slam the door closed when a wedged boot stopped her. "We need to talk."
"Oh? We do?" She couldn't help the spite that dripped from her words. "Have you finally gotten over yourself, Boone?"
She remembered back in Novac, after she'd returned from Utah. They'd gotten into an explosive argument and he'd kicked her out of his hotel room. And although what Cass had told her about being more empathic towards Boone still rang in her ears, she couldn't help but repeat what she'd told him during their last encounter.
"I'll be in Freeside. You're welcome to join me once you've gotten over yourself."
"No," he deadpanned. "But I do have this."
There, dangling from his index finger, was a slave collar. It was worn and scuffed around the locking mechanism at the front. It almost looked as if it had been stomped on a few times which, considering Boone's feelings towards the Legion and their slaves, wasn't out of the realm of possibility.
"Why?"
"It's a long story," he said slowly, thoughtfully. "Can I come in?"
"Depends. What does this pertain to?"
"Do you not see this Legionary slave collar dangling from my finger? Do you think I just carry this around for fun?" He snapped. "Just let me in. I don't know if we're being watched."
Avery made a noise from the back of her throat and stood aside, gesturing for him to come in. He regarded her momentarily before stomping his way past her, heading towards the far corner of the room. He set the collar down on the dresser and turned around to face her, arms crossed.
"I was ambushed by the Frumentarii."
The door clicked closed and she paused a fraction. Something akin to fear nipped at her skin, tingling as it climbed across her back and encased her throat. A lump rose in her chest and she found she had a hard time swallowing. After a moment, she turned to face Boone, keeping her gaze at his dust laden boots.
"Where?" She managed to croak out.
"Novac," he said simply, shifting his weight from one foot to another. "Here's the weird part, though. They weren't looking for me… they were looking for you."
She stayed quiet.
"Apparently, they had been tracking you the moment you left Utah but lost your trail shortly after you departed from Novac. They lured me out of my watch post and ambushed me. When they realized I wouldn't tell them what they wanted to hear, they knocked me out," he ran an idle hand over the back of his head with a frown. "I woke up with that slave collar on."
"I don't understand," she furrowed her brows, finally bringing her gaze to meet his face. "Why would they leave you there instead of taking you back to Caesar? Why put a collar on you?"
At this, Boone picked the device up from the dresser, pointing at a small mesh square on the front. "They enabled the microphone embedded into the collar."
"So… they were spying on you?"
"Manny and I seem to think so, since the collar popped off after I… uh, may have accidentally let your location slip."
"You…" she tried to register his words. "You… WHAT?"
Boone looked sheepish as he put his hands up defensively. "Hey, I had just gotten my head bashed in. I wasn't thinking clearly."
Avery pinched the bridge of her nose and let out a heavy sigh. "God damn it, Boone."
"I made sure to rush here as soon as possible, just in case." She heard his voice waver and she glanced at him from under her brow. "But… they did present me with a bit of information that I'm having a hard time dealing with."
She looked up, trying to keep a cool expression. "What did they say?"
"They… they kept referring to you as the Malpais Legate's whore."
Avery felt her limbs grow cold as she stared at her companion, her vision unfocused. They knew. How did they know? Had they been watching her during her stay in Utah? Avery felt her mouth grow dry and her tongue stuck to the roof of her mouth. Her heart began to hammer against her ribcage as a vision of Vulpes drifted across her mind. He headed the Frumentarii which only meant that he had either dispatched the group to track her down or he himself was at the forefront. The latter part of that terrified her more than words could express.
"But it can't be true, right? There's no way you'd associate with the Legion, not after everything…" he trailed off, studying her face.
At first he seemed confident that they'd gotten their intel wrong, but her silence seemed to grate on Boone and she watched his face fall an imperceptible amount. He awkwardly cleared his throat and she shook her head, coming back to reality, trying to ease her erratic heartbeat.
"Um," she started, her voice sounding foreign to her ears. "I don't… I don't really know how to, uh… fuck."
"No." The look on his face was twisted as he registered her betrayal. "Are you saying…?"
"I… I didn't mean for it to happen, it just did. My caravan was ambushed and his tribe rescued me, saved my life. He promised to lead me out of Zion if I'd help him in return and… well…"
"So you slept with him?" His voice rose a fraction, angry and erratic. "You ran off to Utah and just… spread your legs for the Malpais of the Legion? The very Legion that abducted my wife and… and…" his face was red as he stammered, his rage boiling beneath his skin.
"Former Malpais," she added, quickly realizing what a mistake that was.
"Don't," he snapped, wrenching his sunglasses from his face. She could see the hurt flicker across his naked face and she shrunk away. "That was your 'important reason' for staying so god damn long?"
"I wouldn't have kept you waiting if it wasn't important."
"I didn't want you to find out like this," she said, barely above a whisper.
"No, Avery. If you had your way, you wouldn't have wanted me to find out at all. How… how could you? You know what kind of damage the Legion has done, how many families they've torn apart, innocent lives they've snuffed out. Why?"
She opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. Every time she'd practiced this scenario in her head, she'd retort with a perfectly logical argument. But now that she was staring Boone in the face, it all escaped her. How could she look her friend in the face and try to justify this? Joshua Graham spearheaded the Legion. He massacred thousands in his pursuit of power. If he and Caesar hadn't come together, the Legion may have never existed. She was very aware of the fact that not only had she bedded the enemy…. but that she had fallen in love with him, too. It was wrong. It was so very, very wrong. But the heart wants what it wants, rules and boundaries be damned.
"You know what? Forget it," he barked.
He grabbed the slave collar from the dresser and threw it across the room. It slammed against the wall and crashed into the lamp on the bedside table, knocking it to the ground. She flinched, placing a defensive hand on her stomach without thinking. After a tense moment of silence he put his sunglasses back on, his breathing heavy and irregular.
"I hope you know what you're doing," Boone said tersely, moving towards the door. He wrenched it open and paused, turning back to look at her. His mouth was drawn into a straight line, "Because I sure as hell won't be here to help you."
And just like that, he disappeared, slamming the door behind him. The sadness she'd felt before began to simmer in her stomach and she let out a choked sob, suddenly feeling very empty. Her cheeks prickled with embarrassment and she pressed her hands to her eyes, urging the tears to stop. She was so tired of crying.
Pull yourself together, Avery.
She pulled her hands away and frowned at the moisture that coated her palms. Boone was gone. She supposed this was a long time coming. Nothing had been right between them since she left for Utah and any hope she'd had for repairing things had just been razed to the ground. And although she deserved this, she couldn't help but feel stung at being promptly abandoned. Would Cass also leave her behind once the truth came to light? A pang of fear shot through her and she shuddered at the thought.
With a determined breath, she walked over to her end table and withdrew a hunting blade. She sat at the foot of her bed and faced the door. The Frumentarii were smart. They would've followed Boone to this hotel, especially if they'd had the intention to spy on him for information. Boone was smarter than that. Maybe he thought he'd be here to protect her once Vulpes and his gang had zoned in on her.
She twirled the blade in her hand absent mindedly. If they were going to come for her, she wouldn't give up without a fight.
Then she heard it, the doorknob began to turn. It was so slow, but she could hear it. Her heart leapt into her throat and she gripped her weapon, her knuckles turning white against the blade. After a few painstaking minutes, she watched as the door slid open.
"Hello, Courier."