This is the characters outside the Sasuke spectrum that's commenting on the wackiness that is obviously going on. Guys I have rewritten some parts of story so please go back and read.

Disclaimer: Belongs to Kishimoto, I can't afford a series soo big.

remeber this stopped making sense since shapter

1. Shikamaru.

Love, he decided had hit Uchiha Sasuke like a well aimed kunai.

Shikamaru held back the grimaced glancing at the Uchiha heir who in turn was staring at their favourite blonde with such a rapt attention; he could swear that the boy was praying to his patron god. The enamored expression that captivated his face scared him, but what frightened to the core were not the jealous looks of both Ino and Sakura, but the love stuck adoration that captivated the entire male population of their classroom besides him and Shino of course.

There academy break had wrecked, destroyed and completely gotten rid of the old Naruto. Instead it was replaced by this, "Female Goddess," whispered one of many worshippers. He shivered, the memories of this morning causing him physically pain.

"Holy shit!"

"Who's this beauty?"

"My eleven year old beating heart cannot take the sight of this whimsical maiden, whose golden light has enshrouded us all to bask in her celestial presence!"

It was then the young Nara decided to raise his completely disturbed by his classmate's imitation of poetry only to have his jaw ripped off and sewn back hastily witnessing this obviously new person, but the blonde hair did look familiar. His eyes widened, Naru-

"Naruto!'' screeched Sakura. "Get rid of that shoddy henge!"

"Shoddy!"The blonde starting advancing threateningly, waving her clench fist."I'LL SHOW YOU SHODDY!"

Shikamaru fascinatingly drank in the sight of this obvious destruction and reconstruction of the human body. From her blonde, now shoulder length hair with the curls coming inwards, to glossy sheen coating her lips, to lights that reflected off her ears. He nearly choked on his spit with her clothes. Gone was the abomination deliver via the Ninja Satan, instead it was replaced by an even bigger threat to his sanity.

She was wearing his cropped orange sleeveless orange hoddie, that's tight enough to show that she was far ahead of her female compadres in that department. Right now to the tanned smoothness of her navel, and Kami up above don't get him started on that atrociousness sanity diminishing mini skirt. Who wears orange mini skirt with short slits at the side?

He could clasp his hands in prayer. "Father up above give me strength."

Sakura's annoying screeching slammed his ass right back into the crock of reality.

"You common slut!"

"Up your ass pinky!"

Only for him to turn around getting an eyeful of Naruto's blue underwear. He groaned into his hands. Somebody just help him.

2. Iruka.

"I'm one of the four horse man of the apocalypse." He whispered in dread.

"I created this…I'm a monster."

"I should have never let him take her to the nurse."

Staring at his shakings hands,"I'm the root of all evil." He collapsed on the counter in a puddle of tears.

Ayame just ignored the school teacher focusing her attention on another customer, who obviously was a bit disturbed by the aura of depression that surrounded the young teacher.

"Iruka what's th-".her father, Teuchi placed his hands on her shoulder, shaking his head. He removed his hat placing it on his chest.

"With great power comes great responsibility," pausing dramatically." and Iruka here has abused his, he shall now learn from his mistakes."

Ayame sweat dropped. "I put up with too much."

3. Kakashi.

The smell of smoke permeated the air, Kakashi smiled poking the ashes of that orange abominate his pseudo sister had once called her ninja outfit. He wrinkled his nose and sighed at the thought of her entering the life of shinobi, the one that took everything from him.

Why couldn't she understand that this was for the best?

Let him keep her safe, but she persisted in her screams of fighting back against the harshness of the world.

Couldn't she understand that all he wanted to do was protect from every danger hidden in the shadows.

He sighed his shoulder slumping that's the least he could do for his sensei. Unlike he felt a rock slammed into the back of his head causing him to topple over in a heap. "Sensei forgive me."

"That's what you get for burning my shit asshole!" she cackled running away, leaving Kakashi socked, and surprised warmth fill his heart as he stood up looking at het retreating visage

"You're dead meat Naru."

4.Hinata.

The old witch was taken aback when the doll resembling the last loyal remaining Uchiha of the village was slammed onto her counter by the Hyuuga Heiress.

With a fierce byugukan induced glare pointed in her, she waited with the patience of a saint for the girl to start her infamous tirades. "All I ask is for one simple thing and that was for this doll to grant me the powers of destroying Uchiha Sasuke, that's it, that's all. But No! Instead you give me this crock of nonsense and expect me to work with it, how am I supposed to protect Naruto-kun from him, how? HOW!"

The witched sighed completely unperturbed by Hinata's rant, "Look you bi-polar weirdo, he's obviously protected by some God…I don't care if your faith in god is fickle…I just don't…do me a solid and stay away from me.''

"You know what I will!" Hinata hmphed and stamped out the small shop, vowing to find someone who can actually do something. Clutching the doll tightly in her hand. "Maybe I should take matters into my own hands."

The witch's eyes twitch dangerously. "This place is filled with crazy people.

5. Naruto with a hint of lazy.

She sneezed.

Sasuke sneezed.

She walked a little faster, he too walked faster.

She stopped, he stopped as well.

"Stop following me!" she screamed breaking off into a sprint panicked overtook her body remembering today's events. Until she slammed right into Shikamaru the two toppling over in heap.

She groaned rubbing her bruised head. 'SHIKA, you gotta help me, I could swear it on my parents' graves, he's stalking me, Sasuke-teme wants to sell my soul and give it to the devil in exchange for power."

Shikamaru blinked, "What?"

"He's one those people." She whispered conspiringly.

Shikamaru just flopped back onto the ground, folding his arms beneath his head and gazing at the clouds just tuning out his good friend.

"…I could just imagine it Shika, him dancing on my mutilated body…".

Pretending that world was normal.

"…He gonna eat my heart just like that cannibal on TV…".

That Naruto wasn't this pretty girl or that Uchiha didn't have issues.

"…I'm gonna die…".

Yep, Pretending.

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