Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger, and Rita Skeeter walked into the Wizarding Parliments' gallery.
They did so separately of course. Draco Malfoy sat on the right, Hermione Granger sat on the left, and Rita Skeeter sat in the middle.* They all came equipped with pen and ink, to jot down observations.
This was a normal meeting, in so far as any Parlimentary body ever had a normal meeting. The subjects up for discussion were cauldron bottoms and the efficacy of love potions - in particular, whether the Weasley Wheezes ones ought to be banned. These were close enough to things that Malfoy and Granger respectively might be interested in, that they would excuse the perspicacity of their attendance. At least until someone caught on, which would hopefully be a while.
Rita Skeeter attended every Parlimentary session, and so she sat where she always did, jotting lurid tales down on one sheet, while her other hand recorded pertinent observations.
They reconvened in a private room that Malfoy had rented, upstairs in the Hog's Head. Hermione, of course, had rented a second, and Rita had rented a third. It was no skin off Aberforth's nose if they met in one room, but going up to the same room would cause talk. Hermione had thought that Draco was going to turn as red as Ron when she'd asked about why they couldn't all just go up to one room. Rita, giggling like a schoolgirl, had attempted, in a quaintly Victorian way, to explain what a threesome was.
The conversation spun sideways from where Hermione had originally thought it would go. She'd wanted to count Arthur Weasley in her court - as he'd been the last time she'd suggested this. Malfoy had several points to counter this, including that Arthur had originally spoken in favor of population expansion. It was Rita, surprisingly, who make the obvious joke about the fecundity of his wife, and her constantly expanding waistline. Hermione had been so surprised to hear Rita tell the joke that she'd broken out in gales of wild laughter. Perhaps taking this as assent, Malfoy had joined her in laughter. Hermione had not taken this well, her sparkling eyes hid behind a wand as she commanded, "Stop! You can't laugh at them!"
Malfoy hid behind a veneer of snobbishness that was millimeters thick, "And why not? You just did, after all."
"That's different! I like them, they're friends. you're allowed to laugh at friends!" Hermione said.
Rita snuck in, "My dear, I laugh at everyone, friend or not."
Draco, however, wasn't done, "If I kiss the hand of Madame Weasley, may I tell her that joke myself?" And then he tried to turn innocent puppy dog eyes on Hermione, who was much too busy laughing to see.
*Yes. Historically significant. Hermione Granger, everyone. Easily amused by historical references, me too.
[a/n: Reviews, as always, get you more story. Do you like politics? As to the person who was wondering if this Dramione? I ask for a bit of patience before I even answer that question.]