Zuko sleeps in again, and this time Sokka, Toph, and Suki stay huddled around him for warmth while Aang goes off to practice firebending and Katara works on getting breakfast started.
Her Dad is up and tending the fire by the time Katara makes it outside. For a while they're quiet, content to simply enjoy the morning. Katara realizes she's missed this-overseeing mundane tasks together, as a family. The only thing that could make it better would be if Sokka were here, hunched over his weapons, making sure they're in perfect working order.
Dad catches her eye and smiles, and she thinks he's missed this as well. A moment later his smile fades as his gaze drifts over her shoulder.
Katara looks; Zuko is standing there listening to Toph complain about something. He's still wearing Sokka's coat, but the front is open instead of fastened up to his chin. His expression, as Toph continues grumbling, is one of mild bemusement.
Katara tries not to think about the fact that he seems more relaxed around the young earthbender than anyone else in their group. She also tries to ignore the fact that right now, as he smirks and offers some sort of response to the girl's complaint, he looks more like just another kid than he does a former prince of the Fire Nation.
She turns away only to realize her dad is still watching the two of them solemnly. After a moment he shifts and meets his daughter's inquiring gaze.
"I know what Chit Sang said yesterday," he says softly, his tone serious. "But he is Fire Nation. And a member of the royal family. Can we trust him?
He looks back over her shoulder, and Katara looks too, just in time to watch Toph punch the topic of their current conversation.
Zuko winces and rubs his arm, and Toph laughs. Katara can tell even from where she's standing, though, that the other girl didn't hit him near as hard as she usually does, and she knows for a fact that Toph never hits him as hard as she does anyone else.
She continues to watch them as they make their way over to where Chit Sang is working with Aang, stopping far enough away that they won't interrupt, and doesn't answer her dad, because she doesn't know how to.
She wants to say no, that he betrayed them once-betrayed her-and he'll do it again if he gets the chance. If he thinks it's worth it. That he's made their lives miserable for the last three years, and he hasn't done anywhere near enough to redeem himself yet. That he's Fire Nation, and the Fire Nation took first her mother, then her father when he went away to war, and will continue to take whatever it can for as long as it can.
They watch as Zuko obligingly leans forward so Toph can press the back of her hand against his forehead as if checking his temperature, and as Toph grabs his hand and starts dragging him in their direction, presumably toward the fire.
"I'm fine," he protests as she pushes him toward the flames, but still sits down. It doesn't escape Katara that he drops down closer to the fire than is normal for him.
Toph plops down beside him and turns her empty gaze in the direction of Katara's father.
"Sparky left everything behind to come help us," she says, and Katara is completely unsurprised that Toph overheard even as her father blinks. "His family, his people, his position. Nobody made him do that. He chose to leave on his own, and find us, and now he's doing his best to make things right."
Zuko's shoulders hunch forward as he stares at the fire. Katara notices, but her dad is still trying to figure out whether or not it's rude to stare into the blind girl's eyes.
"So you trust him," he says, his voice even for all that he's still not entirely certain where to look. It's his first real conversation with the earthbender, and Toph isn't making it easy for him.
"With the Avatar's life," Toph confirms. Beside her, Zuko's cheeks take on the slightest pink tinge. He clears his throat.
"Toph," he says, because she still has unseeing eyes leveled in the direction of Katara's dad as if they were a weapon, and the man doesn't seem to know whether or not to look away.
She turns the same empty gaze on him, but he's still staring at the fire, the scarred side of his face towards her.
"I'm not looking at you," he says without looking up, and Toph lets out a cackle. Her arm brushes his ever so slightly, then-
"Ow!" he yelps as she digs her elbow into his ribs, and Katara resists the urge to smile-she does not want to be caught smiling at him.
Zuko looks up. First at her, then at her father.
"I'm here to teach the Avatar firebending so he can stop Firelord Ozai," he says, his voice steady. "Aang trusts me."
Katara's dad raises an eyebrow in response. "And my daughter? Does she trust you?"
Zuko meets the older man's gaze evenly. "She has every reason to be wary. Nonetheless, she's giving me a chance to prove myself."
Zuko's answer is not remotely accurate and has left out a lot of background information. It certainly doesn't even begin to cover the way she's treated him. Katara doesn't correct him, though, and for some reason neither does Toph.
"He did just save all your butts back at that prison," the younger girl points out instead. Katara's dad glances at her uncertainly, but concedes the point.
They all flinch as a panicked shout reaches them from across the courtyard.
Aang. Katara is suddenly running, breakfast forgotten. Out of the corner of her eye she watches Zuko not-quite bank the flames as he turns and darts after her, and a small part of her mind, the part that isn't worried about Aang, wonders if that counts as firebending and whether or not he should be doing it.
By the time Katara reaches the practice yard Aang has bolted halfway up the side of the temple and is refusing to come down in spite of Chit Sang's best efforts-the man is pleading with him in a way that if Katara didn't know any better would think sounds more than a little frightened.
"What happened?" Zuko gets the question out before Katara can, and Chit Sang flinches.
"He lost control. I don't know how bad it is-he bolted before I could get a glimpse of it." The older firebender looks worried.
Zuko tilts his head back to stare at Aang, half perched on a tiny ledge along the side of the temple and sighs. "I should have told you, he's-a little bit nervous around fire still." That was probably the understatement of the year, but neither Toph nor Katara made any effort to clarify the matter. "Maybe it would be best if you gave us some space."
Chit Sang looks suddenly relieved, and Katara isn't sure why. Maybe he just doesn't want to have to face Aang after him getting burned. Or maybe he just doesn't know what to do. He leaves fairly quickly, though, and gives Zuko a wide berth as he goes.
"How do we get him down?" Katara's dad wants to know.
"Aang?" Katara calls.
No response. She tries again.
"Aang, we know you're hurt! Come down so I can take a look at it?"
Nothing.
Katara looks at her dad, but he doesn't seem to know what to do any more than she does.
Zuko lets out a long, irritated sigh and takes a deep breath.
"Aang!" The sudden bellow startles everyone around him and reminds Katara uncomfortably of days not long enough ago when he was still chasing them and all he seemed to do was shout and throw fire.
"Give him a break. He's probably scared right now." Katara's glare is a little harsher than she means it to be.
Zuko shakes his head and turns his attention back to Aang. "Do not make me come up there!" He shouts, and Katara might be impressed by the way his voice carries and seems to echo off the very stone around them if she weren't busy grappling with the absolute absurdity of the threat he just delivered.
"Fine." Zuko growls and starts stripping off Sokka's coat. He's grumbling under his breath as he does it, unaware of the looks he's suddenly getting from the people around him.
He steps up to the wall and looks over it with a critical eye, and Katara can't help but wonder how far he's going to take this, and whether he thinks this is actually going to work on Aang-
And suddenly he's moving, climbing up the side of the wall as if it offers no more resistance than a ladder.
All Katara can do is stare in open-mouthed shock at the firebender scaling the side of the temple like some kind of lizard-monkey. Her father is staring too, and Katara has a feeling Toph would be equally dumbfounded if she weren't busy monitoring his progress up the stone wall and looking slightly perplexed.
He's about eight feet up when Aang decides to come down after all, dropping and landing in one quick, easy motion that leaves Zuko suddenly still and glaring down at him from his current position. Katara's still having a hard time accepting that he's hanging off the side of a stone wall as if it were nothing, even though the evidence is right there in front her.
Zuko pushes off and lands with a soft thump, sinking into a half crouch that Katara cannot help but think is practiced, and straightens as if nothing out of the ordinary just occurred. He retrieves Sokka's jacket and slips back into it as he approaches Aang.
The Avatar cringes, but doesn't back away. He even offers his arm to the firebender, revealing a patch of angry red skin running along his forearm.
"What happened?" Zuko asks, and there's an edge to his tone as he cautiously reaches for Aang's hand and draws the injury toward him for closer inspection.
Aang visibly resists the urge to pull away as he answers. "I'm not sure. The flames got big when they weren't supposed to, and then my arm was on fire."
Zuko nods as if it's exactly the sort of answer he expected. "It's easy to lose control, when you're just starting," he says. "A momentary lapse in focus, a little too much breath-or too little, it only takes a second."
"I've never burned myself before when we were training," Aang admits. Zuko shrugs.
"It looks worse than it is," he says. "Probably feels worse, too. This wouldn't leave a scar though, even if Katara weren't here to take care of it." He offers the twelve-year old a tight smile that is most likely meant to be reassuring. "I've had worse just for missing a step, back when I started learning.
Katara has no idea what that's supposed to mean, and apparently neither does Aang, but Zuko's moving back so Katara can step in and actually heal the injury, so she doesn't get a chance to ask.
A moment later the burn is healed Aang is darting off across the courtyard like nothing happened.
Zuko watches him go for a moment, then sighs.
"Back to basic forms without fire," he mutters under his breath, and Katara is pretty sure he isn't talking to her. "At least a week, I guess." He catches her watching him, her eyebrows raised. "We'll see how he does around Chit Sang, and around fire in general."
"Is that normal? For students to get burned during their lessons?" Katara wants to know, and there's a bite to her words, but Aang just got hurt during firebending practice, and even though it's not actually Zuko's fault, she's still a little bit angry.
His eyes widen just a bit, and he nearly takes a step back. It makes Katara feel a little guilty-it's been a while since he's reacted that obviously to the not-quite accusations that sometimes slip out around him even when she doesn't mean them to.
"He's still learning control," Zuko reminds her. "Accidents happen." He shakes his head. "I honestly didn't think I'd have to worry about it," he admits.
"Why?" Her father's eyes widen at the accusation in her voice as she asks. Zuko himself flinches.
"I thought Chit Sang could handle it. I should have made sure." He frowns. "As Aang's teacher, it's my responsibility to make sure he doesn't get hurt."
Zuko sighs and looks across the courtyard at Aang, who is talking animatedly to Sokka and Suki, then looks back at Katara. "Most beginners would have picked up at least half a dozen burns during their first week of practice. I've been trying not to let that happen, since I found out about the incident with Jeong-Jeong."
"That's..." Katara's surprised. "thoughtful of you."
"I don't want him to be afraid of fire. It's not really safe, for one thing. And it makes it difficult to learn when you're afraid of accidentally hurting yourself-or anyone else." Zuko looks away again, uncomfortable, and it suddenly occurs to her wonder if he was afraid of his element, after his face was injured.
She can't imagine being afraid of water.
Katara spares a moment, as they sit down to eat, to appreciate that Zuko took the time earlier to bank the fire. Breakfast would have been thoroughly burned by the time she made it back had he not.
She tries not to think about the way Aang winces, when Chit Sang brought it back up to temperature. Or the way Zuko scowls at the Avatar's reaction.
Toph elbows him, not as hard as last time, but still with quite a bit force.
"So, when were you going to tell us you were part gecko?" she asks, grinning. Zuko looks over at her briefly, and then her question seems to register, because he immediately ducks his head and looks away.
Toph laughs, and nudges him again. "Come on, spill. Where'd you learn to climb walls like that?"
Zuko purses his lips together in what can only be described as a pout while Sokka frowns.
"When you say climbing walls-" he begins.
Katara huffs. "She means Zuko literally started climbing up the side of the temple after Aang when he wouldn't come down."
Aang looks over at Katara, then at Sokka, who is now laughing as if she's just told the funniest joke he's ever heard in his life. "He really can scale walls, Sokka," he says. "That's why I came down. I knew if I didn't, he'd eventually make it up there anyway." He shrugs as Sokka stops laughing and stares.
"You're serious?" Sokka looks over at his sister as if to confirm that this is not, after all, a joke.
Aang nods. "That's how he got into the Fire Nation stronghold, when he rescued me as the Blue Spirit."
"Say what, now?"
"Why did you leave the palace?" Katara's dad asks halfway through breakfast, and Zuko nearly drops his bowl.
Toph is glaring at the Water Tribe Chieftan, but he's watching the young former prince intently and waiting for an answer.
"Dad," Sokka says.
Zuko takes a deep breath. "It's okay," he says quietly. "It's a fair question." His gaze drifts to the fire, and for a moment he's silent.
Trying to decide how to answer, Katara suspects.
"Even before I was banished, I was never really Da-my father's favorite," Zuko says at last. "I wasn't as smart as Azula. Or as strong. Or as good at firebending-she was a prodigy, you know. Never let me forget it." He's still watching the flames, avoiding looking at any of them as he speaks, and the vulnerability in the words makes him sound impossibly young.
"I tried to make up for my shortcomings by working even harder. I stayed up late into the night studying, and I practiced each new firebending form until I could do it with my eyes closed. I thought, if I just worked hard enough, that I could prove myself. That he would be proud of me, just like he was of Azula. That maybe he'd even lo-
Zuko breaks off and takes a deep breath. The fire, just starting to flicker as he spoke, steadies. Katara wonders what he had been about to say, but knows better than to risk breaking the spell that seems to have settled over their group.
She also knows that Zuko is being uncharacteristically open with them, and that one wrong word is all it will take to get him to clam up.
"I was banished for speaking out of turn at a war council," he continues a moment later, and his voice is steady, if soft. "Stuck on a boat in the middle of the ocean with no home, no honor, no family but Uncle. With one chance to redeem myself. I became obsessed. Finding the Avatar was the only thing that mattered to me."
He spares Aang a brief glance before turning his attention back to the fire.
"I spent three years travelling the world, searching for him, refusing to admit that I had been sent on a fool's errand. No one had seen him for one hundred years. My father looked for him, and never found him. His father searched, and never found him.
"And then, there he was. Past all hope, beyond all probability, the Avatar was within my grasp. I had a chance to redeem myself. To return home. To make my father proud-how could he not be, if I managed to succeed where even he had failed, and brought the Avatar back to him?"
Zuko scowls, and the fire suddenly seems hotter, though the flames themselves remain calm. His head jerks up to meet Katara's eyes, and there's something hard in his gaze.
"When Azula showed up in Ba Sing Se and made her offer, that was all I could think about. With the Avatar in our grasp, I could prove myself at last. I could restore my honor. I could go home. I betrayed you."
He means all of them, Katara knows: her, Sokka, Aang. But something in the way he refuses to look away suggests that he also means her specifically, as if he understands that his betrayal hurt her in a way it did not hurt the others, after their conversation and the closeness she thought she had only imagined between them before he turned on the Avatar.
Zuko's shoulders slump. "I was welcomed home as a hero. My honor restored, my place as father's heir confirmed. I had everything I thought I ever wanted."
Here he hesitates, and the flames flicker uncertainly. Toph shifts, nudging him in the way she does when she wants to reassure someone but doesn't want to be caught acting sappy. Zuko takes a steadying breath and goes back to staring at the fire, but not before Katara catches a glimpse of sorrow in his eyes.
"It didn't change anything," he admits, his voice roughening. "Azula was still-Azula. She wanted the Avatar, and she used me to get what she wanted. She didn't suddenly care about me, or even respect me. And my father-" Zuko shrugs.
"I had forgotten what it was like, in the Fire Nation. In the Palace. The propaganda. The superiority." He shakes his head. "I spent too much time away, I guess. It's one thing to grow up constantly being taught that the war only started because we wanted to help, and the other nations were too stubborn and stupid to admit they needed it and let us, and another thing completely to see people fleeing their homes with little more than the clothes on their back out of fear."
Zuko looks up. His back stiffens, he pulls his shoulders back as if bracing for a fight, and forces himself to finally meet the Water Tribe Chieftan's gaze.
"I saw the truth of the war. Children sent off to die in battle. Families torn apart. People fleeing their homes, if they were lucky enough to leave before they were dragged from them. Villages burning. Refugees, battered and scarred and burned and starving, while in the Fire Nation palace we feasted every day. And I-I've done my share of terrible things, in the name of the Fire Nation, for reasons that turned out to be purely selfish."
Zuko's voice hardens, and for a moment he looks-and sounds-every bit like Warrior Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation, son of Firelord Ozai, heir to the throne.
The blood turns to ice in Katara's veins.
"This war is wrong. It must be stopped. My father-Firelord Ozai must be stopped. So I left, and again went looking for the Avatar, to offer to teach him, in the hope that it will be enough for him to put a stop to it."
Katara's father meets Zuko's gaze evenly. "And you didn't dare try to stop him yourself, while you were still in the palace. Didn't dare face him."
Katara knows her father is testing the firebender, to see how he'll react. Sokka knows it too, and that's possibly the only reason he keeps quiet. He certainly doesn't look happy about it.
"I'm not good enough to beat him in an Agni Kai," Zuko admits quietly, the hardness leaving his voice in an instant. "Even without-" he raises his hand halfway to the scarred side of his face before he catches himself. "Even if I had the skill, I doubt I could do it. I couldn't even turn his own lightning back on him when he threw it at me."
Katara blinks.
"Hold on-" Sokka is suddenly on his feet. Aang is staring at Zuko.
"He hit you? With lightning?" Toph demands. "When?"
"How are you not dead?" Sokka wants to know. "Wait, was he trying to-?
Zuko scowls. "On the day of the eclipse. I told him I was leaving, and where I was going. He tried to kill me by shooting lightning at me. I don't think he realized I could deflect it."
"You can deflect lightning." Katara's voice is flat. Zuko shrugs.
"Uncle taught me. It seemed like a good idea. Father can shoot lightening. So can Azula." He shrugs again.
"And your dad tried to kill you, and you deflected it, but not back at him." Katara's voice is still strangely even as she tries to process this new information.
Zuko looks away. "I missed by about a foot. I just-couldn't do it."
Katara doesn't like Zuko. She's still not sure she trusts him.
She's not sure she can fault him for not being able to kill his own father, even if his father is Firelord Ozai, and even if it would have made things a lot easier.
She wonders when she became comfortable with the idea that at some point they're probably going to have to kill the Firelord. That doesn't seem like a normal thought for a teenage girl, but they are fighting a war.
She also wonders if Zuko's okay with it, as long as he doesn't have to kill the man himself.
"Can you teach me?" Aang wants to know. He's excited now, and Katara's not sure if the twelve-year-old is ignoring the part where Zuko's dad tried to kill him or if it's just not registering properly. She's pretty sure that while sometimes Aang sometimes misses stuff, he also intentionally ignores things so he doesn't have to think about them-or talk about them.
"Now?" he asks, when Zuko nods, then looks at the firebender's half-finished meal. "When you're done eating?"
"Meditation first." Zuko says gruffly, as if he hasn't just essentially bared his soul to everyone present, and Aang groans.
"Or we could take a break," he suggests, and Katara is almost certain he's trying to distract Zuko, if not the rest of them as well, from the previous conversation. "I was injured this morning, you know. I could use some time to, uh, recover."
"In which case, learning to redirect lightening should probably wait until you're feeling stronger," Zuko points out. "But meditation is actually beneficial when you're injured or recovering. It helps clear the mind, and it helps the body heal faster."
Aang's eyes flicker over to Chit Sang, and Katara realizes he's nervous about training with the man after this morning. Zuko's eyes follow.
"Chit Sang is welcome to join us, but he doesn't have to." Zuko says, and Aang relaxes. The older man looks away.
Author's Note: I have no idea where this is going, I'm just along for the ride.
Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender does not belong to me.