Chapter 3: Lone Sitter

Marge was in the kitchen dressed for church when she heard Homer entering behind her. "Well honey I'm off to Moe's"

"What about church?"

Not seeing it as a big deal, Homer explained "I skipped going to the bar last night, so I could watch that heartfelt movie with you. If I don't make up for it soon, I'll miss out on all the gossip."

After confronting Homer, Marge saw her kids enter the room (also not dressed for church).

"Why aren't you kids ready for church?"

"Grace's band needs me for the concert they're having to save Springfield Forest."

After listening to her daughter's legitimate excuse, Marge turned to face Bart and listened to him say "Milhouse and I are working on our plan to get back at Damian."

Patting his wife on the back, Homer said "That's why we have you Marge. You can be the one person to sit through the boring services so that the whole family can get free passes to heaven.

Crossing her arms at his selfish reasoning, Marge scowled "OHH!"

Church

Marge sat alone in the aisle as she listened to Reverend Lovejoy's sermon.

"Today's lesson reminds us that while God wishes us to treat others as we would want to be treated, there is a point reached when He tells us to let our enemies have it!"

Hearing this made her think of the threatening films she had seen the past few days, as she began to slide down in her seat.

"I read to you Deuteronomy 7: 1-2 "When the Lord your God brings you into the land you are entering to possess and drives out before you many nations… then you must destroy them totally. Make no treaty with them and show them no mercy!"

Moe's

Sitting at the bar with his friends, Homer listened to Lenny ask "So Homer, how did Marge like movie night?"

"Just great. I don't think I've ever had her hold me so tight!"

"Yeah, nothing turns a girl on like a romantic movie and a bottle of champagne." Moe added, not knowing it was a horror film.

Filling him in on all the details, Carl added "Nah, Homer took the romance one step further, by showing Marge a scary movie to shake things up."

"And it worked perfectly."

Lenny smiled at the memory of the movie he suggested and said "That Anthony Hopkins really knows how to win a girl over."

"Actually, they didn't have "Silence of the Lambs," so I had to go with "Saw IV and V"

Finding it suspicious, Carl asked "Marge was turned on by stabbings, blood gushing, and haunting deadly threats?"

"Oh yeah, I've never felt so close to her."

Leaning over the bar towards his customers, Moe snapped "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! If you really want to turn a girl on with terror, show her 'The Exorcist!' Guy practically lived in here for two weeks after he watched it, 'cause he was too scared to go to sleep!"

Homer's eyes lit with anticipation as he replied "Wow… it'll be like a second honeymoon for us!"

Springfield Forest

Jazz Fest

Eyeing the open land, Lisa said excitedly "Wow! I've never come this far out here."

"Yea, my brother and I used to come here when we were little."

"It's beautiful! You guys play here every year?"

A somber look formed on the teen's face as she said "Yea, but that might not continue to happen."

Bruce then arrived where he saw his sister standing with Lisa. "Thanks for your support Lisa. The better the music, the longer the guys will be able to stand being tied to those trees."

Still impressed by the activity, Lisa asked "Do they volunteer for this every time you need to save a location?"

"They all volunteer, but for different reasons. Half are just as concerned about saving the land as we are. The other half is suicidal."

Unsure of what to say, Lisa rubbed her neck and muttered "Uh huh…"

Turning towards the band, Grace asked "So, you guys ready to rock?!"

"WAHOO!"

Stage

The pronouncer stood on stage in front of the crowd preparing to introduce the band. "Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for…The Clean Slates!"

Grace then stepped up to give a brief announcement before beginning the music. "Hey everyone, before we start, I want to give a shout out to our inspirational group… The Tree Huggers! So if you like saving land as much as this band, grab a rope and promote our hope. And a one… a two… a one, two, three!"

"Well I know this pretty place…

That means the world to me.

28.

Spent my best days in this space…

Now my happiness can't be."

(Tommy with a keyboard solo)

"To tear down this special part

Replaced with modernity

Would take a piece of my heart

For all of eternity."

(Lisa with a saxophone solo)

"Springfield Forest is the best place that I know…

Springfield Forest, where the trees will always grow!

Springfield Forest, we'll never let you go…

Springfield Forest, the best place for a show!"

(Chuck with a trumpet solo)

"We will not surrender…

We will not back out.

Bring on the contender…

We'll win without a doubt!"

(Chris with a drum solo)

"The trees will stand tall…

The land will stay clear.

The workers will fall…

We'll stay with no fear!"

(Whole band plays)

29.

"Springfield Forest is the best place that I know…

Springfield Forest, where the trees will always grow!

Springfield Forest, we'll never let you go…

Springfield Forest, the best place for a show!"

After listening to the crowd's loud applause, the band left the stage to hear Bruce say "Check it out guys, over 200 signatures!"

"See what a little contribution from others added to your own hard work can accomplish?" Lisa pointed out.

Bruce informed them "Yea, we even got The Tree Huggers to sign while you were playing."

"How did you manage that?" the skeptical girl asked, before turning to see The Tree Huggers signing with a pencil in their mouths.

Looking down at the signatures, Grace said "Well, this is more than we ever could have hoped for. Thanks Lisa!"

Bart's Room

Sitting in his room with his friend, Bart said "Okay Milhouse, there's only one way we're going to be able to get back at this kid."

"Tell his mom?"

"No…"

"How?"

With an evil smile on his face, Bart said "Let's just say, Damian's going to be sorry he didn't buy a copy of Bart Simpson's 'Awesome Answers.'"

"Are those answers really correct?"

"Wait and find out on the tests tomorrow."

Staring sadly at the floor, Milhouse sighed "I'm not getting my money back am I?"

:

Video Store

Homer was searching for The Exorcist when he ran into a familiar face.

"Homer, great to see you neighbor! Picking out a video for the old family?"

"Actually, it's for me and Marge".

Ned's eyes lit with excitement as he said "Oh even better! Nothing like spending time with your wife-diddly-ife!"

"Yea, these scary movies have really been doing the trick. I may use them to turn our romance time into family time. You ever watch scary films with your family?"

"Oh no sirrey! The boys aren't allowed to watch those until they graduate from college!"

"Ned, maybe someday you'll wise up and get a life… a scary life!"

"Ha-ha, oh Homer… the only life anyone needs is one that's filled with joy and doing good deeds!"

Rolling his eyes at his overly enthusiastic neighbor, Homer replied "Yea… I got to go."

Not taking notice of his neighbor's lack of interest in him, Ned eagerly waved "Good luck with the movie friend!"

"Stupid Flanders."

Later That Evening

The Kitchen

Marge was nervously preparing dinner when she heard "Honey I'm home!"

"AHH!"

Not caring for once about the food, Homer began to explain "I've been thinking about those movies we watched, and I realized I may have been going the wrong way with the romance. For that reason, no more Saw movies."

Marge sighed with relief at the news as she replied "Oh thank goodness!"

The eager man then pulled out the new film and added "Instead of face stabbings, say hello to demonic possessions. I present to you… The Exorcist!"

The fearful expression returned to Marge's face as she nervously gulped "Homer, I have to tell you something…"

Shushing his wife, Homer said "Uh-uh-uh… don't spoil the movie."

"Hmmm… kids dinner!"

Dining Room

Eyeing the tasty meal, Homer said "Great looking dinner sweetie. My stomach's possession of this food is a great preview for the demon's possession of that girl."

Doing her best not to think about the movies, Marge asked "Hmmm how was your day you two?"

A smile lit up Lisa's face as she replied "Great! The band's performance was a huge hit! We received over 200 signatures for our petition to save the forest!"

Marge patted her daughter on the back and excitedly said "That's wonderful sweetie!"

"Yea, it feels great to be accepted while knowing you're making a difference in the world."

After hearing about her daughter's successful day, Marge turned to her son and asked "How was your day Bart?"

Feeling optimistic again, Bart replied "Milhouse and I have been coming up with a plan to get back at Damian… tomorrow he's going down!"

Listening in on the conversation, Homer smiled at the thought and added "Good for you boy. There's nothing sweeter than revenge! That and doughnut day at work."

Bart's Bedroom

Lisa was walking down the hall when she heard Bart singing to himself in his room...

*Do-do-do-do-do*

Entering the room, Lisa couldn't help but ask "By the way Bart, what exactly are you planning on doing to Damian?"

Smiling innocently, Bart said "Lis', all you need to know is a lesson will be learned through no physical violence."

Crossing her arms at the sad excuse, Lisa asked "What kind of lesson?"

"One that involves my best three schemes: cruelty, framing, and vengeance."

Not being one for violence, Lisa replied "Sounds to me like this kid has some deep, psychological issues. Have you thought about talking things over with him?"

An awkward silence occurred until Bart at last decided to continue on with his plan "So tomorrow we're going to walk up to Damian…"

After rolling her eyes at her brother's inability to think rationally, Lisa turned to leave and sighed "UHH Good night."

Homer's Bedroom

Homer walked in with the movie to find Marge shaking on the bed.

Taking a seat beside his nervous wife, Homer said "Well sweetie, tonight's romance picture is going to make the other's look like first base films. I got the popcorn for you to feed me, the sexy underwear for you to wear for me, and of course… the movie to scare them right off of you for me ha-ha."

Carefully getting off the bed, Marge crept away and said "Why don't you get started while I go change? Watch as much as you want without me."

"Okay, but hurry. This popcorn's not going to feed itself to me!"

Demon: What an excellent day for an exorcism.

Father Damien Karras: You would like that?

Demon: Intensely.

Father Damien Karras: But wouldn't that drive you out of Regan?

Demon: It would bring us together.

Father Damien Karras: You and Regan?

Demon: You and us.

Laughing at the words, Homer called out to his wife who was shaking in the bathroom "It's almost like there's a movie demon that keeps bringing us closer together… right honey?"