Edited: 2019/01/18 12:54am

I took it quite well actually, it wasn't like I didn't care, it just stayed at the back of my mind.

Certainly not denial though.

I really did take into consideration what was going on, and after a lon while I just accepted the fact that I had no choice, I should be happy that I've been reborn into a world with a second chance. No matter if there were ghosts or Shinigamis, I should just live my life normally.

If I'm afraid to die then I'll have to make damn sure I don't die.

Wow, such logic.

My embarrassing fainting incident was already at the back of everyone's mind after a month. Ichigo and I spent most of our time together because frankly, I was an introvert and if I had to deal with one more loud brat I'd actually consider ending my second life just to escape from it.

My parents were brimming with excitement that for once I held a conversation with someone my age and Ichigo's parents came to some delusional conclusion that we were soul mates

Every day there would be some- not so bright - excuse that Mama or Papa would make, commanding me to go next door, who the hell asks their neighbors for a cup of sugar?

It escalated to the point where I would be running an errand and find Ichigo at the exact location. Coincidence? I mean how the hell do our parents come up with these damn ideas? We were five, let me just stress that one fact. How in the hell Ichigo's dad got into his head that we'd spend the rest of our lives together even though we didn't get the birds and the bees talk, baffled me.

Eventually, Ichigo and I came to the conclusion that we couldn't escape our fates. That meant spending time with each other like two peas in a pod and letting our parents secretly- but not too secretly- coo behind our backs. About a year later Tatsuki came into the picture, and soon enough it was the three of us against the world.

She was not one of the other wimpy girls for sure and it was hilarious watching her completely wipe Ichigo's ass when they sparred. Surprisingly, she was a great person to rant to, although her advice would always involve the other party in some measurable amount of pain because 'punching them in the face always shuts them up' as she would say.

"Mai? You coming over tonight?" Ichigo asked, his backpack swinging casually from side to side.

I grinned, bumping shoulders with him, "Of course I am, the birthday boy always needs his best friend by his side."

Ichigo let out an overdramatic sigh, "Yes, but then you find out that your said best friend is an idiot."

I scowled, "I'm not an idiot and it wasn't my fault, how was I supposed to know Hana-san had a pet turtle."

"For the last time, it's a tortoise. And you know that wasn't the problem, you literally threw it into the lake thinking you were saving it from drowning."

"Like I said, I didn't know Hana-san had a turtle." I upturned my nose and gave a short sniff.

"You sure it wasn't because the tortoise ate half your sandwich." Ichigo drawled, his eyes shone with mirth, betraying the permanent frown etched into his face.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

He scoffed, "You can fool everyone in the class, but you can't fool me."

"Next time, don't bring a pet into class for show and tell, maybe then these things won't happen. I won't mistake a turtle for a tortoise."

Before Ichigo could counter me with logic, we had arrived at the school gates.

I patted him sympathetically, "Don't get into any trouble again, 'kay?"

"Hey! It wasn't my fault, he started it." Ichigo sputtered whilst I rolled my eyes, successfully changing the subject. Not wanting to further justify the fact that trying to teach a tortoise to swim was a lenient punishment considering the sandwich had prosciutto because god damn it was expensive and a luxury in the Akiyama household.

"Yah, yah, and I'm a genie from India."

He huffed, his ire rising as he continued to speak, "You should be thanking me that I punched him, he called you a p-"

I let the words process in my mind for a second longer before smiling at Ichigo and with sweet venom laced in my voice, I said, "What? What did he call me?"

He gulped, twiddling with his thumb and staring at anything but me, probably debating whether exposing the truth would end up with someone getting beaten up again. "Well, he...said you were a prissy little girl who probably cries to her Mama constantly, he also called you and Tatsuki..."

He looked around to see if there were anyone present as if anything he said could be worse than the insults thrown at Irina during her first life. "I don't know what it means, but I was angry already so...well...he said...whore."

I paused for a moment, trying to wrap my mind over the word, that's it? I honestly thought it'd be worse, but considering these kids were just seven-year-olds, I shouldn't expect much in the creative department.

I let out a small hum, tapping my chin contemplatively- I swear Ichigo just got a shade lighter.

"Mai...what are you doing?"

My sleeves were rolled up to my elbows as if I was preparing for a decade long war, my eyes set on the familiar school playground. See, Ichigo's a terrible liar through and through, eventually, the news would reach Tatsuki's ears. In retrospect, I was really doing the kid a favor because no one ever wanted to be caught in a fight with the She-Demon herself.

Or...it was just fun to punch the boy who somehow made it his mission to make Ichigo's life miserable.

"Me? Oh nothing, I was just going to have a nice chat with Aki." I singsonged with a slight spring to my steps.

Ichigo snatched my hand as a last ditch effort to hold me back, "Mai! Think this through, you don't want detention, do you? Besides, I already did him good and if you go at him, I'll get in trouble again. And your Mom is scary when she's mad."

I frowned, turning around so fast my hair gave me whiplash. "You want to know what whore means?" I asked, raising one meticulous eyebrow patiently. Ichigo's eyes widened comically before he gave a stiff nod.

I huffed, using his hand on my wrist as momentum to pull him closer to whisper into his ears. After which silence engulfed the air for several seconds.

"...You wouldn't mind if I get the first punch in, would you?"

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

A bruised rib and scratched face later, I glanced at an equally battered, if not worsed off Ichigo. Who knew Aki had his lil gang at his beck and call.

We sat together in front of our parents. Mother looked as if she was ready to butcher someone while father exchanged glances from mother to our slouched forms. He didn't make a move to help, no one did when mother was fuming. Isshin was at home taking care of the kids, but Masaki was casually leaning against our dining table, a grim line pressed on her lips.

"Let me get this straight, I come home to a phone call from the principle again stating that, there was an all-out brawl in the courtyard between you two and a few other kids?" Mom was pacing back and forth now, throwing a heated glare over her shoulder from time to time. It didn't help that the sheer intensity of her anger caused me to wince constantly. You really don't ever get desensitized to her anger, even if you live under the same roof. Ichigo wasn't doing so well either, however, he was able to contain his flinches and only tried to curl into himself as if he could disappear upon will.

I opened my mouth to speak but Ichigo beat me to it, "Sorry, Aunt Saeki, but it's all my fault. Mai had nothing to do with it."

Mom sighed, "Ichigo, I'm not here to wax poetry boy, I want the truth and I don't care how long we'll have to be here until you two spit it out."

"That stupi-"

"Mai!" Mom scolded.

"-boy, made fun of Tatsuki!" I continued, not feigned by her interruption. You see, even if you don't develop an immunity to the devil's incarnate, you do develop huge (metaphorical) balls to face against the said person.

If it weren't for the situation I would've commended my father for being such a courageous man.

Dad chuckled but immediately snapped his mouth shut with one withering glare from mother. "That isn't a good reason to beat some poor kid up! You should know better than this. And you, don't encourage their behavior." Mom scowled, pointing one accusing finger at Dad. Dad shrunk into himself, the gesture reminded me of Hana's tortoise.

"Ichigo, I hope you learned from this?" Masaki reprimanded, her face somewhat solemn, but nonetheless, gentleness was weaved into her eyes as she looked at her son.

Ichigo bowed his head in shame, "Yes, mother." Because although Ichigo wouldn't admit it out loud he was a total Mama's Boy - with a capital B.

I frowned, this was not supposed to happen. Aki deserved what was coming, always picking on Ichigo, with him coming back with new bruises from 'falling' and 'tripping' which both Tatsuki and I never believed. And now even going as far as insulting my other friend?

"Both of you are grounded for a month." Mother continued whilst Masaki nodded her head in agreement.

I waved my hand around frantically, "B-but, but, he called Tatsuki- he called her a-"

"Aki called Mai and Tatsuki a whore!" Ichigo blurted out, unable to contain his anger at the unfairness. They both knew that Aki would come out unscathed, his mother was some high up education official and Aki loved to rub it into their faces whenever he could.

Mother froze mid-step, the room enveloped in complete silence before a sudden crackling sound emitted from mom's presence.

"...He what?" She hissed through clenched teeth. I gulped in fear and stared at Ichigo who blanched. We both exchanged a resigned look at the face of death.

"H-he called Mai an-"

"HE DARE WHAT?!" Mom's hand came slamming down on the wooden table, "No daughter of mine is a whore! I'm gonna beat that kid to oblivion! Wring him dry and shred him to pieces with my cheese cutter!" Mother's hair levitated like snakes while I stared in awe and fear. Maybe when all this was over, I could ask her to teach me it. The party trick would definitely be a winner at our annual Halloween Costume Contest at school.

"Uh, honey...calm down...where are you going?"

"Where am I going? I'm gonna friggin teach that kid a lesson or two, that's what I'm doing!"

"Saeko...I...don't think beating up a kid your daughter's age will change anything... if anything... it's counterintuitive..." Masaki articulated, every word drawn out slowly as if doing so would calm Mother down.

"You're right...beating up a kid is not the right way. Yes, yes, maiming and torturing him will be just fine." Mother snickered evilly.

It took two men, Isshin, and dad to hold mother back and Masaki to talk mother out of it, but that was just mom. We still had the cracked door and strewn pans and utensils in the house.

Although it was a traumatizing experience, it was something that would be recounted for in the Akiyama and Kurosaki household for years to come. And if Ichigo ever mentioned the purple haired demon in his dream, we would kindly not point out the resemblance of said nightmare figure with one Akiyama lady.

With that said, we did learn a very valuable lesson that day.

Never mess with Saeko Akiyama.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Two days.

So much could change in the shortest amount of time.

The first time I saw him, he looked so dead. So cold, and so numb.

I felt as if someone wretched my own heart out as I stared at the damaged little boy who's skin looked too pale, whose clothes were painted with that crimson red, whose eyes looked withdrawn.

I was left speechless, my hands shaking uncontrollably as the information came crashing down.

It was my fault.

My fault.

I could've save her.

Could've saved him from this pain.

Could've saved everyone from this pain.

Could've save myself from this pain.

But I forgot. As foolish as it sounds,

I. Simply. Forgot.

A sudden bubble of shame started at the pit of my stomach rising up until I could feel it clumping at the base of my throat. I clenched my hands into fists as tears brimmed at the corner of my eyes. My hands wouldn't stop shaking, my tears wouldn't stop appearing-

And the guilt wouldn't stop coming.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

I silently entered the hospital room, Ichigo stayed emotionless as he stared into nothing.

Brown orbs sinking into oblivion.

My bottom lip quivered and I tried to bite down to stop myself from bursting out in tears. For god's sake, I wasn't the one who lost a mother and I'm still about to cry. I numbly clambered up into the hospital bed, the only sign of life was through the slight shift he made in order to give me room.

A living, breathing doll.

Pain laced itself into my stomach and I tried my best to ignore the feeling that's been plaguing me ever since.

I proceeded to envelop him into a hug, I could feel him stiffen under my touch but in a matter of seconds, he returned my embrace. I didn't say anything as Isshin came in, startled at the scene but smiled nonetheless before disappearing. Nor did I speak when my parents came in to check on me, nor did I ever move when my shoulder was coated with a strange sense of wetness.

You've got to fix this.

You've got to stop him from feeling this pain.

You have to be stronger.

You have to save him.

Because you're the only one.

The endless cacophony of laughter came to a screeching halt.

Because this was your fault, wasn't it?

A/N: Thank you for the lovely reviews and I'm going to start doing this on a regular basis, yes, that's my resolution. Update my stories daily!