Here is Chapter 15, finally! I aplologise for the incredibly long wait between chapters. Due to course work for college
and applying to universities I barely found the time or the will to write just about anything, but since I finished mostly all
of that over the christmas holidays, I'm now able to focus on continuing this story.

I can't promise that updates will be as regular as they were, but I will try to push a new chapter out as often as I can.

Thank you all for reading and I hope you enjoy the chapter.

"So, what exactly is the problem Mr Mayne?" The doctor sits comfortably in his chair, folding up his glasses and placing them neatly on his desk.

I hesitate to tell him my problems, largely in part to my history with other doctors here. After I was rescued from the Capitol by Plutarch and brought here by Boggs, I had to spend a short while here in the care of the good doctors. As far as the physical injuries went they were great, but when I started telling them about the nightmares and the occasional flashback during the day the only thing they could offer me was a worthless "It'll be okay now." or "They can't hurt you." I understand they were just doing their jobs, but it sure as hell didn't help me. It makes me wonder why I'm here now, aside from Coin ordering me to be.

"Nightmares." I put it bluntly, earning a look off of the doctor.

That seems to clear it up for him as he smiles and nods. "You had this problem before?"

I nod my head. "Not as bad though."

"Hmm." He taps his pencil on the arm of the chair a couple of times. "Explain these nightmares to me."

"Do I really have too?" I've speant the whole day trying to keep them off my mind. Describing what I go to sleep too every night doesn't exactly excite me.

"If you want me to help you then yes, you do."

I sigh, resisting the temptation to tell him I didn't actually want his help, it was Cressida and Coin who wanted it for me. I go on to explain the nightmare in full, during which he occasionally stops me to prod until he's learned every single detail, no matter how small. What intrigues him the most is the part about Commander Thread, the man who's always been in the nightmares, then and now.

"Are you afraid of him?" The doctors eyes bore into me.

It feels like I should say yes, but in the back of my mind there's a little voice yelling no. No, if I ever see him again I'll glady kill him, slowly, like he would have done to me had I stayed in that hell any longer then I had. I don't say that out loud - I'd be getting treated for something else if I had - but I wanted too.

"I'm more afraid of what it is he's doing right now." I settle for something slightly less psychotic. "I close my eyes and it's all I see, like I'm actually following him for real."

"That's nothing out of the ordinary, considering your own experiences and ties to the captured victors." He waits for a moment before correcting himself. "Or one of them."

I'm half surprised he used the word victors and not traitors, almost everyone else in the District does. It seems one person sets the standard for the whole of their kind. Peeta is apparently a traitor, so now Johanna and Annie are too. What's next? Is Katniss a traitor for loving Peeta? For a bunch of people so hell bent on change we have a really hard time looking at the bigger picture. The victors don't need our petty hate, they need our help.

"So what can you do to help?" I ask, trying to rush this along so I can get back to Coin. "Tell me that i'm gonna be fine? Talk some more?"

The doctor, believe it or not, actually starts laughing at me. "No, i'm not going to tell you that. Coin did instruct that I simply council you but I don't think that will work. You're suffering night terrors, in turn this is causing your anxiety during the day."

"Then what?"

"I'll give you something to help you sleep. Diazepam." He explains. "This should also calm you down during wake hours."

Will it stop the night terrors though? What if I take these things and have the nightmare, only I can't wake myself up from it? I realise I should be asking him all of this but I don't want to sound any crazier then I already do. He writes my next appointment down on a piece of paper before handing it to me, telling me how he still wants to speak to me occasionally just to check the perscription is working. With that done and agreed too, he leads me out into the hall, where he tells me to wait whilst he fetches my meds.

I take seat along the far wall, closest to the set of stairs that lead back down to the first floor of the hospital. The doctor is gone for at least ten minuets, most of which I sit there looking dumb or playing with the zip on my ugly grey suit. That is until someone makes their way down the hall, then I can't do much of anything but stare. It's shock more then anything else, shock at watching Finnick Odair stumble aimlessly down the hall looking as though he wants to curl up into a ball and just cry. It's a big difference to what I saw during the Quell, other then the time with the Jabberjays of course. All that confidence and swagger is lost in the form of a broken, distraught shell.

He slowly sits down next me, his hands clasped together tightly around a short length of rope tied like a noose. He pulls at it constantly, undoing it and tying it again, tighter and tighter until there's actually marks left on his palms. It doesn't take him long to realise I'm watching him and when he does I almost feel guilty for doing so. He just looks so sad, so out of it, to an extent where I don't even think he's even in there anymore.

I tear my eyes away so not to make him feel uncomfortable, it's then I hear his voice, low and raspy, mumble. "What do they have you up here for?"

I look his way once again, trying to hide the surprise of hearing him speak to me. "Night terrors." I answer.

His eye twitches a few times as he nods his head. "I get those. It's why they keep telling me I can't leave."

I don't think it's the only reason. Rumours around the district say he's suicidal, letting him out of the eyes of the doctors is just an all round stupid idea. In some ways so is letting him have that rope, though I suppose it's not enough to actually fit around his neck.

"Do they stay with you during the day?" Finnick unties the noose once more and starts over. "Everytime I blink I see what they're doing to Annie. I can't stop it."

"They do." It sounds awful, but you've no idea how relieved I am to hear I'm not the only one who can't get those kind of thoughts and images out of my head. "It feels like you never actually wake up."

"Exactly." He smiles, as though his feelings are mutual when it comes to understanding what it's like.

Things go quiet for a while as he goes back to his rope and I to tapping my finger on my arm to stop myself from getting extremely bored. The doctor is still nowhere to be seen, and neither is whoever Finnick is waiting for. I'm starting to think the doctor was lying to me, just telling me he'd give me something in order to get me to agree to counciling. It wouldn't be the first time they've pulled something like that.

My thoughts are cut off by an extended, rope marked hand as Finnick says. "I'm Finnick by the way."

I shake his hand and introduce myself. "Ethan."

"If you don't mind me asking Ethan, what exactly are your nightmares about?" He puts down the rope and begins fiddling with his fingers. "I know it seems nosey of me, it's just nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like they're going insane."

"I understand." I smile, and I'll openly admit I wouldn't mind explaining things to him like I did the doctor. Mainly because I know he'll agree with everything I say. I don't have to explain it in full though, he pretty much already knows. "Would you believe me if I said it's pretty much the same as yours, only with someone else?"

He watches me for moment before chuckling. "I'm hardly in a position not too."

He's right, he doesn't know me. I could have spun any bullshit story I wanted too and he would've had to take it as gospel. I don't see the point in making something up though, it's hardly like he'd judge me for it.

"Is it a family member? Partner?" He asks.

I chuckle and shake my head. "No, just someone I care about. Despite having not seen them for four years."

"Time can't stop you caring about someone." He looks down at his hospital issue shoes and smiles. "Doesn't matter how long or short, once the feelings are there."

I agree with him, and before I can stop myself I say. "I guess time in the Hunger Games can be a week but feel like a year."

That gets the gears turning in his mind. His eyes widen and lock onto me like a hawk. "You were in the Games?" He stutters a little, reminding me of Blight.

"Yeah." Unable to take back what I said I decide to be honest with him, entirely. "You ugh, you actually wanted your tributes to ally with me and..."

"Johanna." He finishes for me. "I remember you."

I'm guessing it was the beard that made it harder for him to recognise me, or just the four years between now and then. The latter seems the more obvious one I know.

There's a flash of anguish across his face. "I'm sorry. I wanted to go back and get her but..."

As he trails off my mind flashes back to when Plutarch informed us that he had failed to recover Johanna and Peeta. All the anger I felt at the drop of the bomb returns in full force, so bad I actually want to go find the gamemaker and give him a piece of my mind despite the definite reprisal. I try not to feel distain towards him, I know he wouldn't have left them if the circumstances were any different, but it's hard. I wonder, if it had been Johanna they rescued and Katniss was captured would I still feel the same? Would I be this mad at everyone? The answer is likely no, I wouldn't, but if it was Katniss that was captured we already would have stormed the Capitol to rescue her by now. She's too important to lose, anyone else is expendable.

"I wanted to go back too." I mumble to him.

He looks at his hands and nods slowly.

Hurried feet tapping on the marble floors approach us. The doctor - carry two perscription bottles of Diazepam - stops in front of us, bowing his head to Finnick with a warm and gentle smile. I get up out of my seat to greet him and he hands me the bottles - telling me that they should help - along with a note that I was supposed to give to Coin as soon as possible. It's probably his verdict on my sanity. I'm almost tempted to unfold the paper and read it, maybe change it if necessary, but I restrain myself.

"Right then, Mr Odair." The doctor claps his hands and gestures towards his room.

Finnick grabs his rope off the chair next to him and stands, shuffling over to the door hesitantly. The doctor never takes his eyes off the rope, watching carefully how Finnick guarded it close to his chest like it was his child. I can't tell if it's worry I see in his eyes or pity.

Before following the doctor through to his room, Finnick turns around and smiles at me. "It was nice to meet you, Ethan."

"You too." I can't help but laugh to myself as I add. "Finally."

I see him laughing too as he disappears behind the cold steel door.

I hide the bottles of diazepam in by pockets before setting off towards Coins office. I can't wait to hear what she has to say to me when she reads this note. It could be bad or it could be good. I count being asigned to toilet cleaning duties as bad, for the record. Still, in some ways Coin is an agreeable woman and I know she wants me for something other than just sitting around all day. She would have gotten rid of me a long time ago otherwise. Unless that is her plan, to kill me as an example of the enemy in cahoots with Snow. Most people don't trust me, it wouldn't be hard to plant a seed in their minds. That's being a little paranoid though, she wouldn't really gain anything from killing me - it's not exactly like Snow cares about what happens to me is it.

I brush the thoughts away and sigh as I approach Coins office door. There are voices inside, three of them, one unmistakably the authoritive tone of Coin and the other the confident sound of Plutarch Heavensbee. The third is too quiet to make out. I calm my nerves at the sound of Plutarch's voice and knock on the door gently. Coin calls me in.

"Ethan." She smiles. "Just in time.

"In time for what?" My question is answered when I follow Coins line of sight. I feel stupid for not recognising Katniss sitting there at the table the second I walked in here.

I imediately turn to Coin to apologise for intruding on the meeting, but the President holds up her hand and waves it off, gesturing me to take a seat on the other side of her. I ignore the grin forming on Plutarch's face as I sit down, thankful that Coin is sitting inbetween us at least for now.

"Now, Ms Everdeen, you were saying?" Coin smiles at Katniss as she motions for the girl on fire to continue.

I can see Katniss watchig me cautiously for a time, before her eyes drift back to the small sheet of wrinkled paper she holds in her hands. She rises out of the chair she sat in and clears her throat. "I agree to be your Mockingjay, on the following conditions."

Coin nods for her to continue.

"Peeta and the other victors - Johanna Mason and Annie Cresta - will be rescued from the Capitol at the earliest oppertunity.
If and when Peeta is liberated, he will recieve a full and uncondtional pardon and no punishment will be inflicted. The same goes for the other victors."

I stare dumbfounded at Katniss, shocked and elated, that she would even ask Coin to do those things. Coin made it clear to me that she was more then okay to leave those captured to their fates, asking her to rescue them - and then pardon them - was a bold and daring move. Even for someone like Katniss, who right now could probably demand whatever she wanted and get it.

I can see Coin's gears turning in her head as she stares Katniss down, forcing me to wonder what exactly it is that has her debating against the idea. Pardoning Annie would be easy, she knew nothing about the rebellion so therefore can't tell the Capitol squat about us. Johanna is complicated because she did know about everything - the plan in the arena and the plan to overthrow the Capitol - and whilst i'm certain of her enough to trust that she wouldn't say a damn thing to those bastards, Coin isn't. Peeta is the real problem. People are already calling for his head here in thirteen, if Coin was to outright pardon him from everything then there could be another revolt on her hands, with people wanting her head instead of Snow's.

It's still an easy decision for me, taking everything into consideration, but the decision isn't mine to make. Unfortunate as that is. If it were up to me I'd have them all rescued and pardoned by morning.

Coin breaths out heavilly, her steely eyes giving nothing away in regards to how she truly feels about the situation. She contemplates for a moment longer. "No." She says bluntly.

In some ways I knew that was coming. I think Katniss did too, considering she showed little to no reaction at all on the surface. She was feeling it though, that anger and annoyance that I too can feel bubbling back up again. I have to force myself to look in any other direction but at Coin right now, otherwise I think I'll have another outburst and Boggs isn't here to stop me this time.

"It's not their fault that you abandoned them in the arena." Katniss is able to keep her emotions in check better then I am, as she continues to speak calmly, looking Coin in the eyes as she does so. "They're doing and saying whatever they can to survive."

"Individuals don't make demands here in thirteen." The president writes something down in the book in front of her before continuing. "There will be a tribunal, and a fair judgement."

Fair judgement? By a court made up of people who have already made their voices clear on what they think of the victors?
That doesn't sound fair to me. I have to resist the urge to say anything as Coin just directs her head down to her book like she has already decided she wouldn't accept any demands Katniss made. Thankfully, Katniss steps up and says something first.

"The victors will have immunity and you will announce that in front of the entire population of district thirteen." Katniss'
voice is stern and demanding, awe inspiring really that she dare to use that tone with Coin. "You will hold yourself and your government responsible or you will find another Mockingjay."

"That's it!" Plutarch bursts out excitedly, drawing my eyes to him for the first time since entering the room. "That's her. Right there."

It takes me a while to clock on to what he means. Katniss - from what i'd heard - was a mess when she first got here, they had to keep her in the hospital for a few weeks before they felt it was okay to release her. She was a shell of the girl we saw during the seventy forth hunger games and the quarter quell, timid and quiet. The girl on fire has just woken up again when she stood her ground against Coin - even the President herself seems impressed.

Plutarch mutters to Coin, looking as though he's about to jump out of his seat he's so excited. I manage to catch something about impact and propaganda campaigns before they both look back to Katniss, Coin now grinning ever so slightly.

The President nods her head, agreeing to the term. "Do you have any other demands?"

Katniss checks the sheet of paper and looks back up to Coin. The serious, sterness to her tone has disappeared entirely as she rolls her eyes. "My sister gets to keep her cat."

I burst into a fit of laughter