French Extremism
Catullus 85
I hate and I love. Why do I do this, you may inquire.
I do not know, but I feel it happening and I am tortured.
-Catullus
X X X X
"Now, as we all know, the diamond in this scene is meant to symbolize baseball, which, as is common knowledge, has a field in the shape of a diamond. There are four bases on a baseball field, which is frequently-invoked imagery in order to explain how far a person and that person's partner have advanced sexually. There is first base, usually kissing. Then second base, when you and your partner buy a young Russian doll to foster into its adulthood. That, of course, means adding layers when you feel like your doll has reached a certain level of maturity, but that's another lesson altogether. Anyway, third base is telling your partner that you don't like Christmas movies when you know that they have a very deep love and nostalgia for Elf. Fourth base may or may not be sex," Tsuna explained. "But anyway, it's clear that in Titanic, the ocean and the Titanic are meant to be lovers and larger symbols used to embody the love between Jack and Rose."
"Sawada, this was supposed to be a book report on A Farewell to Arms," the teacher sighed.
"Which leads me to my next point, the screenplay for Titanic is better than anything Ernest Hemingway ever wrote in his life!" Tsuna gestured very ambiguously. In truth, she had not read A Farewell to Arms at all. There were multiple reasons for this: 1.) She had a lot of better books to read. 2.) Hemingway was kind of a dick. 3.) She was busy not reading it. "First of all-"
"Sawada, you have taken up a whole class period explaining how the ocean and Titanic in Titanic were romantically and sexually involved. While it is an interesting point, and your classmates are probably pleased that we had no classwork today, it's time to wrap it up. Please return to your seat. If you actually want a grade, turn in an actual book report tomorrow. Class dismissed."
"Love you so much, Hyuuga-san!" Tsuna walked out of the door backwards, her hands held over her heart. Turning to the boys that had appeared on either side of her, she said, "Hyuuga-san is the coolest cat in school! I have no idea why she indulges me like that but she should really stop."
"Maa, she's too old to care anymore. And anyways, I think she likes you," Takeshi said, stretching his arms to the sky.
When Tsuna thought about it, Hyuuga-san really never had been mean to her. Even when she was dame, she always treated her the same as she treated everyone else. Tomorrow, maybe she'd stay after class and talk to her for a while.
The world in front of them exploded in blue flames.
"Oh my god why."
Tsuna's Fight Highlight Reel! *。 ﾟ* ヾ( ゝз・)ノ
Ouch! Fatality!
This concludes Tsuna badly summarizing her own life events. Come back next time!
"Goddamn, we just got beat, my guys," Tsuna said, lying on the ground bonelessly. Sincerely, the fight was the embodiment of the word "yikes!" Considering it was a bunch of young teenagers fighting against an experienced, long-haired man the outcome was not very surprising. "Thank God Dino was here, I guess."
"Yes, there's something we need to talk about regarding that encounter," Dino said. He then explained the affair, which boiled down to a man with a certain motivation: Xanxus di Vongola, leader of the Varia.
"So why isn't he the heir? Isn't he the ninth's son?" Takeshi asked.
"Years ago, Xanxus orchestrated a major coup d'etat to take over the Vongola after his brothers died. It was violent and bloody, and ended with the ninth imprisoning his own son in ice. Not only does the Vongola not trust Xanxus, but many would rather have it fall then hand it over to him, who would inevitably ruin the work of previous bosses and throw it back into chaos," Dino explained.
Deep inside of her, Tsuna knew there was more to it than that. But she also had a feeling that Dino and most other people weren't aware of any of the true reasoning behind the coup or the current challenge. 'Think,' echoed inside of her head. It didn't feel like her voice.
But in her core, a deep feeling of dread was building.
X X X X
"I do not want Lambo in this fight. Choose someone else," Tsuna stated, arms crossed and unyielding. A deep scowl was etched on her face. Across from her sat her father and Reborn. They'd been arguing for over an hour on the issue, even though Tsuna thought the solution was apparent. Lambo was five years old, obviously he shouldn't be put against a grown man. Either choose another person, or forfeit the match.
In fact, all of the guardians had already been chosen without Tsuna's knowledge or input. She could only hope that Reborn had some influence on the decisions. Though, looking at him now, complacent in the indirect murder of a child, she doubted his judgement for the first time since she met him.
All she knew about her guardians was who their trainers were. Reborn's friends, referred to as the 'Arcobaleno' had come, though Reborn had muttered under his breath about Skull's presence. In fact, Reborn had grumbled a lot in the process of getting them to come. Apparently Verde had been quite difficult and Viper was not available at all. In addition to them, Shamal, Dino, and Takeshi's dad were helping out. Tsuna wasn't sure what the use of the Arcobaleno was, since there wasn't going to be much flame training, but apparently the Cervello were very persistent in suggesting it.
"We're not discussing this any longer," her father said. "Lambo is your lightning guardian; he'll fight for you." For a man she hadn't seen in ten years, he was awfully controlling.
"Fine!" she stood abruptly and stormed to her room, closing the door behind her. Obviously she would never slam a door, her mother would hate that. She sat on her bed, tears slipping unprompted from her eyes.
Who was he to come into her house and order her around? Most people's deadbeat dads left and stayed gone, she didn't know why she was cursed with one who obviously didn't care about her, but hung onto her like a leech anyway. The Vongola's intrusion into her life brought only misery.
"Oh, poor little Vongola~" came a voice in front of her. Hesitantly, she lifted her face from her knees. "Did the bad man hurt your feeliiings?" Mukuro mocked.
"If you're only here to make fun of me, I'd appreciate it if you just left." The first time an illusion of Mukuro had appeared in her bedroom, she had sprayed bleach on it and hoped it would die. But still, he lived on like a cockroach, while she just ended up with a bleached wall.
"Why ever would you think that?" he asked. "There are some ways to defy your dear old dad's whims though…" He leaned in to whisper to her.
"Where would I even find one?" she asked after he was done. "Actually, nevermind, I know where. Do you wanna watch Die Hard with me? I'm very sad." And so they sat side by side in bed, watching Alan Rickman's debut film AKA the best movie ever.
"I'm sorry," he said as the credits rolled across the screen.
"What for?" she asked, confused. She turned to him slightly. The room was dim in the night, but she could still see his face.
"I shouldn't have made you relive the memories you did. That was overly cruel, I suppose." At his words, her mind flashed back to her time in Kokuyo. If she had to guess, that would be her hell, with the addition of Imagine Dragons playing constantly in the background. Sorry not sorry, my man.
"I think...that reliving those memories, even though they weren't from so long ago, helped me remember something truly important," she said. "With my new friends and all this mafia business, I forgot what happened. I forgot that I was Dame-Tsuna for a long time. I've lived longer sealed than I have as a normal person, and that's important. I hated myself so much…" she whispered.
Tentatively, Mukuro put his hand on her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her. He really wasn't very good at being nice. Tsuna looked up so she could meet his eyes, unshed tears blocking her vision and hair falling over her face. He hesitated for a moment, but brushed it back over her ear, long fingers lingering over the side of her cheek.
She lifted her own hand to cover his, curling her fingers and searching his eyes for something deeper. The mismatched eyes held something that she recognized: a heat, almost. Carefully, she leaned closer and brushed her lips over his. Before anything more could occur, she retreated slowly to study his reaction.
"Little Vongola…?" he said. Mukuro wasn't one to let confusion cloud his eyes. Instead, they sharpened, burning to find out what her motivation was. Seeing her expression, open in a way that it hardly ever was, his shoulders relaxed unconsciously. Even when they fought, Tsuna wasn't one for underhanded tactics. If she was, Mukuro couldn't see her end goal in this scenario.
"Was that okay?" she asked.
He leaned in this time, pressing his lips to hers more firmly instead of answering. Tsuna tilted her head so the angle corrected itself. Mukuro's hand found purchase in her hair, curling it around his palm while Tsuna grasped his shoulder gently. Her lips parted against his slightly, her arms moving to wrap loosely around his neck.
"Tsu-chan, can I come in?" there was a knock at the door before it opened slightly. Tsuna's eyes opened in panic. She made severe eye contact with Mukuro.
"Oof!" she exclaimed as she suddenly hit the bed face first. Apparently, Mukuro deemed it fit to leave very abruptly. She sat up, rubbing her nose and wondering why she was always injured when she kissed people.
"Tsu-chan?" She turned to look at the figure in her doorway, finding the form of her puzzled mother.
"Hiiiiiiii…" she said, waving pathetically.
"My poor girl…" her mother said, sitting on the side of her bed. "I'm not exactly sure what you and your father were arguing about, but you have to realize that sometimes he knows what's best for you."
"Mom! I-" she protested. She hadn't seen him for a decade and now he comes into her life to tell her that he's sacrificing a five-year-old for a dumb competition! How is that fair?!
"I know, I know. But I'm not here to talk to you about that," she said. "Your father's asleep, so I thought you and I could hang out for a while?" Tsuna looked up, searching her mother's face and recalling all the times she had cried over Iemitsu's absence. But every time he called or visited, Nana would act like nothing was wrong, instead complacently ecstatic at her husband's presence. Her mother, despite being the only person who ever loved her for a long time, was not her ally in this fight. She couldn't deal with that right now.
"I can't. Um, homework, you know," she said. She heard the door click as her mother left the room quietly. Staring at her bedspread in the dim light, she thought about how she didn't really love her dad.
X X X X
Tsuna didn't interfere when Lambo shot himself with the bazooka in the ring. She waited, up until the giant Levi was about to strike a killing blow.
A gunshot rang through the arena.
Tsuna stood, a gun smoking in her small hand, pointed straight at the other Sky's lightning guardian. He dodged; in the privacy of her own mind, Tsuna let out a sigh of relief. There was no sound.
"We forfeit the lightning match," she said in the silence.
"Sawada Tsunami, for your interference-" the Cervello judge began.
"Just take it," Tsuna sighed, holding the sky ring out.
And she walked away.
She didn't look at anyone, not Reborn or Takeshi or Hayato or even Hibari. Because the truth was, even though she was glad she didn't, she was ready to kill another human being. Never point a gun if you're not prepared to shoot, Reborn had pressed upon her. The mafia was definitely eating her soul.
X X X X
"Nee-chan!" Lambo exclaimed later in the hospital room. Although Tsuna had stopped him from being killed, he was still injured in the fight. Looking at his bruises, Tsuna's throat tightened and she found herself with no regret for her actions earlier that day.
"Oh, Lambo-sama, will you ever forgive your loyal servant for landing you here?" she sighed, collapsing onto the hospital bed limply. Her mother was busy seeing her father off with the rest of the kids, so it was just her and Lambo. He giggled at her words.
"Nee-chan, Lambo-sama's sleepy," he yawned, crawling to curl up on her chest. While he slumbered, Tsuna stared at the ceiling and thought. She'd been doing a lot of that lately. The door creaked open.
"Hi, Reborn," she said, not turning her head.
"I'm sorry, Tsuna," he said. She could feel the hospital bed dip from where he sat next to her. She rested her head against his arm in melancholy.
"I don't understand...why did Lambo have to compete? There was no way for us to win, why couldn't we just forfeit from the beginning?" she asked.
"The Cervello were being difficult. They wouldn't let us move forward if we forfeited. In addition, the Ninth's orders were for Lambo to compete, and your father favored that course of action. I didn't have a choice in the matter." Tsuna had also been crying a lot lately. Maybe she had Seasonal Affective Disorder, because she was SAD—capital S, A, and D.
"I'm glad I met you, Reborn," she said.
"I'm glad I met me too, Dame-Tsuna."
X X X X
Tsuna's Ring Battle Highlight Reel! *。 ﾟ* ヾ( ゝз・)ノ
Ryohei barely wins against an offensive, inaccurate stereotype of a gay person. Victory!
Hayato barely loses against a princely kinkster! Fatality!
Takeshi and shark-man's battle is actually pretty lit. Victory!
Goddamn! Chrome and Mukuro are my mist guardian! Victory!
Hibari wins against the Ninth boss! What an accomplishment?
I get my Sky ring back! Victory!
This concludes Tsuna badly summarizing her own life events. Come back next time!
"Alright, boyzzz. I'm gonna have to win against this Xanxus guy or we're toast! Literally, because he's going to set us all on fire…" Tsuna thought for a moment. "Perhaps still figuratively though, since we aren't actually bread…Give me a sec." She played around on her phone for a moment. "Ok, so toast does have to be bread. Alrighty, I am ready to throw down! Let's get this bread, sweatys!"
"That's cringey," said Mukuro, possessing Chrome's body.
"Um, actually, cringe culture is toxic and not something we approve of in this household," she paused to reconsider. "Unless it is directed specifically at the phrase 'spooky season.' Anyway-"
"Tsuna, just get on with it," sighed Reborn.
"Good luck, Tenth!" erupted Hayato, visibly vibrating from nervous anticipation. Tsuna blew him a kiss with a wink. He blushed but caught it and turned to put it in his pocket.
"Yeah, good luck, Tsuna-chan!" Takeshi echoed. Following encouragements were made by Ryohei and Chrome. Hibari said nothing but made intense eye contact with her for a while. After a awkwardly long time, she turned away and looked to see Reborn tip his fedora to her in acknowledgement. Tsuna bravely resisted the strong urge to make fun of him for doing that.
Walking up to the ring, she surveyed the crowd around her. Obviously her guardians and those who trained them, including the Arcobaleno, were present. Except for Yamamoto-san, since he had to mind the store. Glancing at the Cervello, she was startled by the intense look in their eyes. If she really focused, she could even sense that their auras were faintly familiar. What-
"Sawada," her train of thought was interrupted. "It's nice to see you even showed up," Xanxus taunted, standing cockily in front of her, completely relaxed. "I don't know how they think a tiny thing like you is going to beat me." He chuckled.
"Oh, shut up," she complained. "Listen, can we just fight?" she called to the judges over her shoulder. Usually, Tsuna talked a lot, but she couldn't see how it could help in this situation. If she was gonna die today, she might as well get it over with.
There was a tight sensation in her stomach, then orange flames burst into life around her. The mittens on her fingers melted into gauntlets. She could feel everyone and everything around her. The ring halves on her and her opponent's necks called to her. On a larger scale, she could feel her and Xanxus' flames, how they might fit together if given a chance. Shaking her head and dodging a hit, she forced the topic from her mind.
But on the edge of her senses, she could feel something else. Hidden under illusion so tight she would not have noticed before Mukuro's mental imprisonment, there was that familiar presence again! It was dark, stifling, and completely baffling. Strangest of all, it was definitely coming from the Cervello.
There was nothing she could do, however. She was engaged in a fight-to-the-death with a very angry, older man. If she called out, he'd probably just use the opportunity to kill her. There was that calm voice in her head again, telling her to wait it out. Her immediate reaction was doubt, but there was really no other choice and the voice never steered her wrong before.
With a clash, the steel of her gauntlets met a fist on fire. Although her physique was not terribly suited to her position as a brawler, it was apparently a style made for her. While he was open from his previous attack, she swung her fist and aimed slightly to the left of his head. Predictably, his nose gave a satisfying crunch at the force of her attack.
Using flames to propel herself backward, she took a moment to assess the situation before he could retaliate. Taking a deep breath as he drew his pistols, she built a wall of ice in front of her, saving her from instant death.
She took a step forward, her shield moving with her. She could't hear anything over the gunshots. Seeing Xanxus preparing to charge, she closed her eyes for a moment before dropping the ice. Propelling herself forward, she met him a crash of conflagration and pure power. On the outskirts of her senses, she could feel both a stirring of the Cervello's flames and the Varia's mist flames at work.
She could worry no more about that, however. There was a split second in which she could perform the maneuver that, in her soul, she knew would win the fight. When the smoke cleared and Tsuna could see beyond the spots blocking her vision, she saw Xanxus' hands encased in solid ice. Not even the flaring of his flames could melt them.
Ice spreading from the soles of her shoes, she trapped his feet so he could no longer move forward. While he wrathfully struggled, she let her flames dim until she stood as a normal teenage girl once more.
Walking up to him, careful not to slip on the ice covered arena, she carefully unclasped the necklace he wore, removing the half-ring and connecting it with her own. In her hesitation putting it on, it was snatched from her hand by a shadowy figure, revealed to be Xanxus' mist.
"That's totally against the rules!" she exclaimed as the mist revealed the other rings as well. In the audience, there was a murmuring as her guardians discovered their rings missing. She was going to make a scene, when the united rings began to work in union, melting the hard-earned ice that imprisoned Xanxus.
"I am the Vongola Tenth!" he exclaimed, slipping the ring on his finger. For a long moment, nothing happened. When there were no adverse effects, Xanxus began to laugh, a wicked cackle that spoke of retribution. Tsuna shivered at the sound. Soon, though, a long chuckle was interrupted. Tsuna paled as blood dribbled out of his mouth.
It began with a low cough, but soon Xanxus had collapsed to the ground. His drawn-out, hacking coughs were disturbing and sounded painful. 'What's happening?' she wondered. In the back of her mind, connections were being made. There was a reason she was the only candidate until now, and she didn't think it had much to do with Xanxus' violent tendencies.
No one better qualified could be chosen because Tsuna was the only person related to the Vongola Primo by blood. And there Xanxus was, clearly being rejected by the Vongola ring, a ring designed to only connect to people with the right blood.
"He's..." she hesitated. "He's not the Ninth's biological son, is he?" she realized, horror dawning on her as she covered her mouth with her hand. She rushed to him, kneeling to pull the wretched ring from his finger before it purged all the blood from his body. She let the ring drop to the ground between them. It splashed in the puddle of blood it reaped.
"No, dear Tsuna," a soft voice rang out. The Ninth, tired-looking and physically wrecked, stood at the edge of the arena. "You're right. Xanxus...Xanxus is adopted." Pinching the bridge of his nose. "Let's just say that he didn't take the news well."
"...the coup?" escaped her mouth before she could think more of it. The Ninth nodded with a grimace.
"In light of this new information, the Cervello must formally declare Tsuna as the heir of the Vongola famiglia," the judge said. "Now that that business has concluded, however, we really must tell you all why you're truly gathered here." Her eyes widened as the forms of the Cervello judges morphed horrifically into the familiar forms of the Vindice guards.
"What?" Tsuna whispered.
"Bermuda, what is the meaning of this?" Reborn demanded. Tsuna wasn't aware that they were acquainted, but seeing them now, there was definitely some history between them. It was almost like an electric current in the air.
"Reborn," her eyes widened. "You never told me you were an ex-lover of this weird Vindice guy!"
"Dame-Tsuna, please shut up," he sighed. Tsuna thought it best to be quiet, since it was obviously a sensitive subject. "What's your plan here? I thought you were happy with our arrangement?" At this, Tsuna's thought process shifted. Perhaps not an ex-lover, but a jilted hook-up?
"Yes, I was content to remove Kawahira's influence over those dreadful pacifiers, but now I'm feeling a little jilted. Why does your generation get to age and live the rest of your lives while I am cursed to this half-life in the prison? I was thinking, and it just didn't seem fair."
"Can't you see? You've let the nature of your flames influence your actions! This is completely-" At that moment, the Vindice's strange flames were released, forming a blast so powerful that Tsuna completely blacked out for a moment, but not before holding on to whatever was nearest to her tightly.
When she came to, she seemed to be in an abandoned part of the school. The entire ceiling was wrecked by the explosion, beams sliding in to reveal the bright sunlight of midday. Tsuna tilted her head to look at the sky from her position on the hard ground.
Looking forward, she started at finding her fist closed tightly over Xanxus' wrecked form. His eyes were still closed from the ring incident, but she worried that he might be more injured than he looked.
"Xanxus-san? Xanxus-san, wake up!" she said, shaking his shoulder desperately. Maybe he was dead? She checked his pulse hesitantly, but a quick hand snatching her wrist halted her progress. Looking down, she saw Xanxus' eyes opened and narrowed in a fierce glare.
"Who said you could touch me, brat?" he demanded.
"Dude, sorry for caring if you were dead? Jeez..." she huffed. "Well, at least neither of us were injured too badly. We should probably get out of here to look for others...What?" she asked, finding his gaze locked on her abdomen. Looking down slowly, her jaw dropped.
Her body must be in shock or something, because she couldn't even feel the beam of steel impaling her body.
A/N: Alrighty, I actually wrote something down! Sorry it took me more than a week to update, I am a very bad person. Also, I am breaking the law by combining the Varia Arc and the Rainbow Arc, but too bad. And this won't really be the Rainbow Arc but you know, it be that way sometimes. Don't worry, I will do the Inheritance Arc at some point?
Did u guys notice that I am not good at romance? I try because I like reading it, but I sincerely have no idea what genre this even is. It's sure not humor lmao. This chapter was kinda action-y, right?
Side note: right now I have 69 favorites. Nice.
Thank you to everyone who followed, favorited, and reviewed! 3
To answer some specific reviews:
SilverLight70- Yeah, those were her memories in the beginning of the chapter, but nobody saw them but her and Mukuro. At the time, I don't think he would have cared at all because his trauma, in comparison, is so much worse, I guess? Like bullying shouldn't be taken lightly, but it's much better than being experimented on. Her and Mukuro's relationship is kinda complicated. Thank you so much for all of your lovely words!
Thanks also go out to PortgasDTatze, decimo2750, lovelydragonfly, Foxluna, yachiru-chan92, and foxchick1! ( ˘ ³˘) 3
See ya next time!