Death, Life, and the Between

She was flat on her back. She was neither warm nor cool and smelt nothing. Her fingertips rested on something flat, as did the meat of her palm, parts of her back, legs, and arms did the same. She was bare, but, no sooner had she thought of clothes, they were on her.

As she thought, she had to be, or so she figured. She remembered languages: English, Korean, the little Latin she started learning, and the Japanese for the red thread spell. Though not much, she heard. There were quiet, stifled cries that sounded far.

Her mouth tasted as it often did to her after a long sleep. She seemed to have all her senses, still. All that was left to check was sight. Siria opened her eyes into a glittering, almost snowy, mist. It loaded in pieces, almost how some a video games did. The ground was white and soft. There were vaguely tree-shaped things, as if someone who had only heard of them secondhand tried to make them from snow.

What interested her most, were the swings. Siria rose off the ground. She dusted the knees of her jeans, though they were clean, and approached the old swings. These were the swings from the park near Privet Drive. Sirius, disguised as Snuffles, used to watch her swing here. As she sat down, it creaked, as it always did. So did the one beside her.

From thin air, a man appeared. He had untidy dark hair and Siria blurted out "James?" The man smiled as he turned to face her. It was not James Potter. He was older than any photo of James. James had also only dressed nicely in the wedding photos. This man had fine, dark crimson dress slacks, a black button up, and a Gryffindor tie.

The man parted his hair with his fingers to reveal a scar similar to Siria's. His was a simple lightning bolt and started just a little higher; it didn't even touch his eyebrow, whereas Sira's left a piece of eyebrow missing and went down to her eyelid. In his almond shaped green eyes were the same flecks of almost-yellow and the rings of his irises were deep green, like hers.

"Hello," he greeted her like an old friend. "I'm Harry James Potter. What's your name?"

"Siria…" she muttered in reply as she squinted at his eyes. He chuckled.

"It's nice to meet you Siria," Harry said. "I don't suppose Voldemort just killed you?"

"He did..." Siria said. She leaned back on the swing, away from him. "Did I mess it up?"

"Not at all," Harry told her. The laugh lines of his smile were like Sirius's. "You did a great job."

"So," Siria planted her feet on the ground as she held the chains and leaned on the seat, "I'm dead."

"It's complicated," Harry said. "Why don't you tell me a bit about yourself?"

"Do you decide what happens next?" Siria asked. "Like, if I get to go back or stay here, or go somewhere else?"

"Not at all."

Siria raised her feet and swung low on the swing. Something still cried. The only thing that looked "alive" beside her and Harry, was a small crumbled skeletal cat looking thing beneath the slide. She dug her feet into the ground and pointed, with her hand still on the chain, at it.

"Shouldn't we do something about that?" Siria asked, her nose scrunched.

"There isn't anything that can be done," Harry said. His brow furrowed a bit at it. "I don't know how much you know, but that's the piece of Voldemort." Siria nodded.

"This might sound silly, but I was really scared," Siria confessed. "I'm a Gryffindor, so you'd think I'd be fine dying at fourteen for the greater good, but it took me a whole year to get here." She rocked on the swing, "It's not that bad."

"You're only fifteen?" Harry asked. Siria nodded. "Was Lily Evans your mother?" Siria nodded again. "Didn't she die to save you? Or do you not live with the Dursleys's anymore?"

"Oh," Siria planted her feet to stop the slow sway of the swing. "The Protection Charm…" Siria hummed. "Maybe because I wanted it? That's more a question for Hermione, Dumbledore, or Sirius—" Siria's throat closed.

The "No!" she heard someone scream echoed through her mind. Sirius saw. Sirius watched Siria accept death, but that wasn't how he would see it. Hermione and Ron might have seen to. They would have followed Sirius to her. Who would tell the Creevey brothers? Or worse, Hagrid and Remus?

"Harry, could you tell me how to get out of here?" Siria asked and rose to her feet. "I have to go back."

"Siria, there's no need to rush," Harry said. "I'm just here to explain some things to you, but it helps me to know how much you already do." Siria groaned and crouched down. She squeezed her eyes closed.

"Why don't we start with Horcruxes?" Harry suggested. Siria rose up. She looked him square in the eye.

"I'm not really a Horcrux," Siria said. "They're objects with the intent for evil, like Tom Riddle's diary. There might be a piece of Voldemort with me, but I'm not evil… though, I did just kind of… do something bad." Siria sighed. She curled back down and pressed her head to her knees.

"Mr. Potter," Siria said, "I don't need explanations or many questions answered." She looked up at him. "Can I go back?"

"Yes," Harry said. The furrow in his brow back. "But time passes a little differently here. You have time to get answers." Siria rolled her eyes, but she sat back down and started to tell Harry Potter the story of her life.

Occasionally Siria would pause to see if Harry needed more detail or wanted her to skip ahead. When she finished, he told her how he handled things. Siria tilted her head to the side and sighed at him when he finished explaining that he took the Thestrals to the Ministry.

"Harry, are you like 'parallel universe' or 'alternate timeline' me or am I A.U. you?" Siria asked. She wondered if, since he was older, if he was the "original" or if it was like in comic books and sometimes the older one was the revamp.

"That I don't know," Harry said. "I have met other Harry Potters, a Harry Evans-Potter, a Harry Evans, a few Harriets, but I met Dumbledore when I died."

"Well, my—" Siria stressed the word as though it was due to her "—Dumbledore is still alive, so I wouldn't very well meet him here."

"If you decide to return, you could ask him," Harry said. Siria gave a soft "hm" then shook her head.

"He might think I've been concussed," Siria said. "I don't even know if I'll tell Hermione. Ron'll believe me no problem… how are your Ron and Hermione?" She held out her hand to stop him. "No!" Siria clapped her hands over her ears. "I change my mind— I don't want to hear. I couldn't handle if they died or were miserable. Don't tell me!" Harry laughed.

"It sounds like you've lived a good life so far," Harry said. "You got to spend a lot more time with Sirius than I did. I'm a little jealous."

"I bet I spent the most time with him," Siria said with a wide smile, as she kicked off to swing.

"You'd be surprised," Harry told her. "A few of us have been adopted— right after James and Lily died."

"What?" Siria skipped to a stop. "That's not fair! What about the Protection Charm?" Harry shrugged. "Oh, Sirius is never going to hear the end of this," she shook her head and let herself swing again.

"You're sure I'll come back okay?" Siria asked. "Lily and James aren't expecting me, are they?" She shook her head. "You know what, don't tell me. They'll be there when I die-die, and Sirius is waiting for me, so are Hermione, Ron, and the others. Plus, I've got an O.W.L. tomorrow too."

"You're worried about O.W.L.s?" Harry chuckled. "Hermione's been a stronger influence on you than she was to me."

"Well, my Hermione's pretty amazing," Siria said and stuck her tongue out as she swung by. "She's learning Korean with me; started the Hogwarts Herald, the school newspaper; made informational flyers about Voldemort, the Death Eaters, and how to protect each other; she got the Hogwarts House elves set free at fourteen; has gotten really good at Legilimency— right" Siria said at the impressed look on his face.

"Sirius gets us all the books we want for it— he tells me about all the things he used to do with money and that he considers an investment in our education to be a better cause," Siria said and allowed herself a laugh. "Besides, he's been bringing me books since I could read."

Harry Potter used his hand to cover his smile, as Siria did when she knew she shouldn't be. She glared at him as she swung above the bar. "You're just, one of the more nerdy ones," Harry told her. Siria rolled her eyes.

"If you're not using your resources, why do you even have them?" Siria asked. "Hey," Siria leapt off the swing, to stop, and hurried back to Harry. "Does the Magical Community go public in your world?" Siria asked with a hand on his chain.

"No," Harry said. "I think there's only been one, a Harriet, but we never went into hiding in her world."

"Why?" Siria shouted. She covered her mouth and stepped back. "I mean, why are there so few? We could make people's lives better. We could help them, like Dumbledore considered, but he was only seventeen and his actual ideas were terrible…" Siria sighed and sat on the ground. "I'm fifteen and dead," she put her head in her hands. "What am I talking about?" Siria sighed again. "It isn't your fault."

She rolled her head back. "I suppose this is my last question. I don't expect you to know, but I would rather ask and you not have an answer than not ask and you know," Siria prefaced it. Her eyes mirrored his as she stared intently at him. "Have you ever heard of '힘의 변화'? It translates to 'change of power', and it might just be fairy tale nonsense," Siria said. "It's just, Baek is looking into it because she says there might be more to it, since she thinks 'A Tale of Two Brothers' is based on a real story…" she trailed off and let of the swing's chain as she stepped back.

"Never underestimate a fairy tale," Harry told her. "It's because of a 'fairy tale' that I beat Voldemort."

"How?" Siria asked.

"Through a lot a luck and a little coincidence," Harry said.

Harry got to his feet. "Siria," Harry said, "There are just a few things before you go back, if you really want to." Siria beamed and rocked forward onto her toes as she nodded. "There are a few Horcruxes left," Harry told her. "Dumbledore will get the ring, it sounds like he always does. You've got to get Hufflepuff's Cup, Ravenclaw's Diadem, and Nagini."

"Cup, Diadem, snake," Siria repeated as she bounced on her heels. "Got it."

"Now, next year, Malfoy…" Harry stared at Siria like he didn't know how to tell her. "You can't save Dumbledore," Harry said, "no one will believe you about Malfoy, but you're right."

"I am?" Siria asked. "Is every us right about him?"

"So far," Harry said. Siria smiled.

"So, he changed after all," Siria thought to herself.

"Okay!" Siria said. Any moment now, Harry would tell her how to get home.

"Now," Harry said, "I tell everyone a few things my Dumbledore told me." Siria took a breath and held it in, rather than sigh. "This is real and happening inside your head," Harry said. "Be forgiving, don't pity the dead, pity the living and those who live without love," Harry told her. [B7, 722-723] Siria looked a the piece of Voldemort.

"Can we really not do anything?" Siria asked. "I mean… if I should 'be forgiving'... no" Siria shook her head. "He deserves worse than death."

"Do you really believe that?" Harry asked. Siria clenched and released her hands.

"I have to," Siria said. "So, Cup, Diadem, snake, and Dumbledore will get the ring" Siria listed on her fingers, "I'm right about Malfoy, and might be onto something with [change of power]." She smiled, but it fell as she looked back to the piece of Voldemort. If she was really onto something...

"Actually," Siria said. She approached the curled up, skeletal figure that sobbed beneath the slide. Siria swept the figure into her arms. It felt almost like Dobby, but was somehow smaller. She looked back at Harry Potter. "Don't look at me like that," Siria said as she rose back up, the piece of Voldemort cradled in her arms like a baby.

"You'll have died for nothing if you bring it back," Harry said. Siria pulled on a smile.

"I don't believe that'll be the case," Siria shrugged a little.

"You said he deserved worse than death," Harry reminded her. He tucked his hands into his pockets.

"What I have in mind is," Siria said. She learned something about herself that she couldn't confess aloud. The part of her that wanted to hurt others got out. It was more malevolent than she anticipated. "While I don't know if what I learned is 'good' exactly, I'm going to embrace it," Siria thought.

"We can't all follow the 'Harry Potter' way, even if we all saved the Sorcerer's Stone, beat the basilisk, and entered the Triwizard tournament," Siria said. "There has to be a point where the road divides or why would there be others? It sounds like we've had our little differences, but it's time I really find my own way." Harry sighed. The furrow in his brow was so much like Sirius's, she wanted to tell him, but sensed that Harry's Sirius may not be around anymore.

"Thank you," Siria said with a smile, "Harry Potter, for everything you've done. I feel like I'll carry a piece of you around with me forever. Good luck."

"There's no Voldemort left in my world," Harry told her.

"There are worse things than Voldemort," Siria said. "So, what happens to you?"

"I'm just taking a nap," Harry said. "I told you, time is a little different here," he pulled on a smile that was almost familiar. "Good luck, Siria Potter-Black."

The snowy park blurred in a storm of mist. Then it was all gone.