Rashpaw: Hello my dearest viewers! It's War-Cats Confessions!

Chip: And Happy New Year to all of you!

Rashpaw: Welcome to the New Years Special, we sincerely hope you will enjoy it.

Chip: Ok enough formal, let's welcome the heck out of our guests.

Rashpaw: Alright, first, how about a scenery report? From non other than that great lug, Blackstar, reporting LIVE from Sin City, Las Vegas, Nevada! LETS GIVE IT UP!

(A screen is lowered down, and Blackstar is with this very cool microphone)

Blackstar: Hello viewers, it's a-me-ah, Blackstar.

Chip: How's the weather over there?

Blackstar: Uh, chilly. And a bit wet, I think it's raining! Oh wait no it's JUST SOME DRUNK PEEING ON MY NASTY MAN GET OFF!

Rashpaw: (whispers) Maybe we shouldn't have chosen Vegas for New Years.

Blackstar: Anyways, the scenery is BEAUTIFUL, many flashing lights from stores seeking your attention, songs sung from people seeking your attention, and performers seeking your attention. Honestly, it's a sight to see.

Chip: Wow, it's breathtaking! Hey look, you can see some guy doing the worm! Daaaaang he's GOOD.

Blackstar: But it smells HORRID over here. Unless you love the smell of cigars, this ain't for you. Hey man STOP SMOKING DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU ARE DOING TO YOUR BODY? DO YOU WANT LUNGS BLACK LIKE MY FEET? HUH DO YOU WANT TO DIE? Wait-w-w-wait is that a taser? Oh, it is? Wow, uh-uh fascinating! Ok you are getting too close now. Uh please stop looking at me like th-th-th-that...

Chip: BLACKSTAR, RUN!

Blackstar: (Runs away screeching) Ok (huff) I think he (huff) (huff) is gone now...

Rashpaw: That was a close one. Hey c'mon, it's New Years, let him screw up his lungs a little.

Blackstar: He can screw it up all he wants now for all I care.

Chip: So...uh, moving on to our list, it's interview time!

Blackstar: Right, right. So, young lady, what do you think about Vegas?

Blossomfall: Well OMG it's like totally perf. Like we just got totes wasted at the hottest party! And our hotel is like, GORGIES. It's so big and like, SHINY!

Blackstar: Uh, so how's the food?

Icecloud: OMG, it's like FABU! You should really totes try the sushi, it's killer. And the root beer floats, it's to die for.

Blossomfall: Totes.

Icecloud: Totes.

Blackstar: Thank you for that. What do you think is the best about Vegas?

Blossomfall: OMG.

Icecloud: OMG.

Blackstar: Omg what?

Icecloud: OMG, it's obvi the shopping!

Blossomfall: Yeah, like where have you been? Anyways, check out these fabu collars, it's so in.

Icecloud: Plus, it's got SPARKLESSSSS.

(They both squeal and do a Z formation, hip rotation, and a booty sensation.)

Blackstar: Wow. Thank you for that. Not really. Well, back to you, Rashpaw and Chip.

Chip: Thank you and I'm so sorry, Blackstar. Our next guest interview is with

Rashpaw: Wait that was my line-

Chip: MouseFURRRRR!

Rashpaw: Twerp.

(Canned applause as Mousefur creaks in.)

Mousefur: THANK YOU THANK YOU OH I SO DO LOVE FOR THE APPLAUSE.

Chip: Hello, Mouse-

Mousefur: Ew no please do not address my name, you are not worthy you little fleasack.

Rashpaw: Okay this is going to be a hard one.

Mousefur: Ok so what? We're burning daylight here!

Chip: Well technically right now it's night, and-

Mousefur: I'm leaving.

Rashpaw: No, WAIT! Hold on old lady we have some stuff to ask you, and THEN you can crawl in your troll hole.

Mousefur: What.

Rashpaw:

Mousefur: Did you.

Chip:

Mousefur: Call me?

Rashpaw:

Chip:

Rashpaw: Uh... you know what let's also invite the next guest in, the more the merrier right, haha so right, darn right...

Chip: Er, let's welcome BerryNOWSE!

(Canned applause as Berrynose walks in.)

Berrynose: Oh thank you so much oh thank you it's such an honor I love you! (Smooches and kisses)

Rashpaw: Geez, you are FULL of it.

Berrynose: Yes, full of pure PERFECTION! (purrs at camera, annnnnd smile)

Girls from audience: Awwwwww

Chip: Well! So, Mousefur and Berrynose, what was your best New Years memory?

Mousefur: Well-

Berrynose: Oh, it was when Firestar threw that wonderful party with the stuffed mouse, and-

Mousefur: SHUT YER YAP I'M TALKIN'.

Berrynose: (squeaks) Yes m'mam.

Mousefur: (Clears throat) Well, mine was when Firestar threw that wonderful with the stuffed mouse, because by StarClan's butt, they were DELICIOUS. Wow, I probably had like SEVEN.

Berrynose: (mutters) More like seventeen. I can't believe you stole my line.

Mousefur: Anyways, I loved the part when we all started the countdown and then when we got to one some loser farted.

Berrynose: That was you!

Mousefur: No. That was some loser who couldn't hold it in because they probably ate seven stuffed mice already.

Rashpaw: Very fascinating. Seemed like fun. In my Clan we did the countdown too, it was awesome. Cobrastar hosted the party, and all the clans in our forest came. He even let me invite Chip so he wouldn't have be a loner and like do nothing that day like a loser.

Chip: Uh, I am a loner. I live alone. Hence, a loner?

Rashpaw: Anyways, Mousefur and Berrynose, what are your New Years Resolutions?

Berrynose: Well

Mousefur: To-

Berrynose: NO I'M TALKING FIRST I CALLED IT

Mousefur: Ok, geez, calm your fuzz man.

Berrynose: Well MY resolution is to be even MORE perfect. And to get my fur in that hottest new style. Also, it's so improve my grooming schedule. My old current one, you see, is too lick paws, lick arm, clean head, clean ears-

Mousefur: NO ONE CARES

Rashpaw: No one really does, I agree with Grandma here.

Chip: Uh, so Mousefur, yours?

Mousefur: (grunts) I'm perfect. No upgrades needed.

Rashpaw: Right.

Chip: Uh, thanks for coming, here are your gift bags, and uh you can leave now.

Mousefur: Whatever.

Berrynose: THANK YOU THANK YOU IT WAS A PLEASURE BEING HERE DON'T WORRY I'LL BE SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS AFTER THE SHOW, THANK YOU MY SWEETIES MWAH MWAH KISSES!

Rashpaw: WAIT! Mousefur!

Mousefur: Wut.

Rashpaw: (whispers) Have you ever, frick fracked?

Mousefur: No.

Rashpaw: Like any cat?

Mousefur: No.

Rashpaw: Crush?

Mousefur: No.

Rashpaw: Friend zone?

Mousefur: No.

Chip: You are one heartless soul.

Mousefur: Didn't hurt me when my mom said it, doesn't hurt when you say it. GOOD BYE SUCKAS

Rashpaw: What about you Berrynose, did you likee Honeyfern better or the other one?

Berrynose: Uh, obvi Honeyfern! She's hot!

That other one whose name we have forgotten: (sobs) I KNEW IT I KNEW YOU LIKED HER BETTER.

Honeyfern: Hey I'm really sorry, sister, but HAHAHAHA HE LURVES ME BETTER! JUST LIKE HOW MOM ALWAYS LIKED YOU BETTER

Berrynose: Uh. How did they get here?

Rashpaw: No idea. Oh yeah. I might have had left the door open.

Berrynose: Gulp.

(The two she cats throw a hissy fit and then they had to call security.)

Chip: OMG THE COUNTDOWN TIME IS HERE!

Rashpaw: TEN!

Audience: NINE!

Chip: EIGHT!

Cobrastar (from backstage: SEVEN!

Berrynose (from being beat up by the she cats): SIX! (owowow!)

Mousefur: Four! Wait no FIVE!

Blackstar (form Vegas): FOUR!

Blossomfall and Icecloud (also from Vegas): THREE!

That guy doing the worm: TWO!

Satan: ONE!

Everyone: HAPPY NEW YEARS!

(Streamers and firecrackers and fireworks fill the stage)

Rashpaw: Hey, have a happy New Year, ya hear?

Chip: What she said!

Blackstar (from Vegas): AND DON'T SMOKE!

Have a fabulous New Years! Get rowdy ;)

~RashpawWrites