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"So how long are we going to be out here?" I sighed. We literally just arrived at the stream a second ago and he was already being a child. "I told you I don't know. I meditate for as long as necessary." He rolled his eyes at me, arms over his chest. "So annoying." He mumbled kicking a rock into the water. I glared at him for a moment but that didn't seem to affect him. "Well are you going do this or what?" It was my turn to roll my eyes, "What are you just going to watch? Don't you have some training to do?" He waved me off but didn't budge. I shook off the frustration, not a great way to start a meditation session. I walked out to the water, its down ward flow just enough that I had to push a bit more chakra to my feet.

I got comfortable. Allowing myself to become one with the flow of the stream. I brought my hands to my chest and started to knead my chakra. My breathing became steady and I - "How are you doing that?" I stumbled forward as my foot dipped into the stream. I was able to catch myself before I completely fell in. "What is wrong with you!?" I turned to look at the idiot sitting lazily next to the edge of the water. "You chakra is wild. Without the Sharingan I can still see it." He continued to talk completely ignoring my questions. I felt beads of sweet roll down my face when I realized I was becoming self-conscious about Sasuke watching me.

"You know what meditation is right?" His eyes narrowed at my voice. I was talking to him like a child. "It means I need concentration." I took a breath in and tried to steady myself again. "Maybe you're just not really good at it." I pinched the bridge of my nose this was turning out to be the worst idea of all time. I faced him with my hand on my hip. I wanted to smack the smirk right off his face. "Maybe you're just super annoying." He didn't seem affected by my words which made me angrier. "Maybe you're just easily distracted." He leaned back on his hands eyeing me. Okay Suiren, you have been through worse. Just don't punch him in the face.

I thought about that chakra, the purple powerful one and instinctively I reach for my neck. I had to meditate to control it; if I was easily distracted did it mean that it could still easily take me over? I caught Sasuke stiffen as I did. We hadn't really talked about it since the day of the preliminaries. "Did they seal it?" He asked and I turned from him. "They can't." I mumbled. Taking care to sit on the water with a thin layer of chakra separating me from getting wet. "What? Why?" I sighed not really wanting to have this conversation with him. "I really don't want to talk about this right now." I knew it was fruitless to even say that. He was too stubborn. "To bad." He said leaning forward again. It was easier to give him what he wanted then have him fight me on it.

"The bite infused unstable chakra to my chakra network. To seal it they would seal my network and id die. That's all anyone knows. I meditate to keep the chakra in check because whenever I use even a bit of that purple chakra it seems to rot some of my own." I snapped more then I wanted to at him when I thought about my own chakra rotting. I wasn't mad at him but the situation wasn't one I liked to think about. It put me in a sore mood. He pressed his lips in to a thin line. "Then what are you waiting for?" He said leaning back so his eyes were on the sky rather than me. His voice sounded agitated and callous. I shut my eyes hard and let me hands drape on my knees. My heart was racing and I could feel in in my throat.

I concentrated on my breathing to slow it down. My brain buzzed with thoughts of swirling purple chakra. I chewed the inside of my cheek and flinched at the cackle of evil laughter that echoed in my skull. A laugh that used to wake me up from sweat filled nightmares. Since I had started meditating the nightmares became less and sleep became more like death that I greeted kindly. Orochimaru and his plans always lingering in the back of my mind but I tried to ignore it for more tangible thoughts. Ones of training and getting stronger. Of passing the Chunin exams and training to join Anbu but the bad thoughts pushed through the good ones.

I saw those yellow snake like eyes plastered against my eye lids. His voice wondering what was to become of me. I was some enigma that no one understood. Like at any moment I could snap and let myself be over taken by power or maybe I would just die and my existence would be nothing but a stain on the tapestry of life. What was it all for? What was my purpose? I wanted to protect the village and my friends. I wanted to make something of this life but could I with the idea that this sannin corrupted the goodness that everyone sees in me. My head hurt from the thoughts. Things I didn't think about except for passing moments were now in the front of my head demanding answers I didn't have.

I wanted to clear my mind but I couldn't. There was a tug of war, my heart right in the center and it burned. I tried to push my chakra out and pull it back in. Usually it was enough to sooth me but I was having trouble. It swirled like a tempest, uncontrollable and I didn't' know how to tame it. It will be interesting to see if you even survive it. His word stirred in the pit of my stomach. "Suiren ..." My ear pricked at my name. The snake's voice echoing around me. "Suiren .." Distorted evil, I wanted to run from it but it didn't matter because it was everywhere I turned. "Suiren!" My eyes wrenched open. Sasuke...

My eyes locked on to those hard onyx ones. The air around me filled with raging water circling me, wild wind push and pulling this way and that with furious, burning chakra I almost didn't even recognize. I saw him mouth my name one more time and my brain stopped along with everything else. Water splashed back down, the wind stopped. I gasped for air jumping up, chakra rushing back into my body. My feet dipping into the stream as I made my way over to dry land. I tumbled to my hands and knees, trembling. My red orbs hastily looked around almost thinking I'd see Orochimaru before my very eyes. "Snap out of it!" He gave me a firm shake and the trembling stopped.

My eyes darted to the sky. It was high noon when we arrived and now it was well passed then "What happened?" My mouth opened and my voice was horse. "You were still and quiet, for hours. Your chakra orbiting your body." He looked over to where I was, the scene seeming to play over again before his very eyes. "You twitched and the water and air started to circle you. Like a storm. What happened?" He looked at me just as confused as I felt. "I don't know." I mumbled not knowing why it happened but that it was somehow linked to my thoughts about Orochimaru.

"I lost control. Im sorry." I pushed myself off the floor trying to ignore the fact that I started shaking again and I couldn't stop. It had been so long since his voice felt so real. I thought I had gotten past this but here I was again. I just couldn't understand it. All that hard work. "Let's get back." I said quickly. He followed close behind me without saying a word. Puzzled but I was glad he didn't push me. I felt one more push and id go right off the edge into insanity.

Kakashi didn't say anything when we got back. I quickly grabbed the first book I could reach and found my spot a top my favorite rock. My eyes felt glazed over as they scanned across the valley. I couldn't even tell you what chapter I was on if I wanted to. Trust in your instincts because they will never lead you astray. The Hokage's words echoed in my head. I had to trust myself right? Well my instincts were telling me that something was wrong. I wish I knew what exactly but I didn't. The advice seemed great but it was almost impossible to trust your gut when it couldn't speak.

I didn't move when Kakashi took the seat next to me. I could sense his chakra before he even got close. I could sense him pacing back and forth since I got back. "What's on your mind kid?" I sighed. What wasn't on my mind was probably an easy question to answer. "I had a really bad session today." I mumbled, my head spinning at the very thought of it. "Well what happened?" I shrugged my shoulders and let my eyes fall to my lap. "I think something bad is going to happen. Something really bad." I looked over at my sensei. His one eye scanned my face, "and why do you say that?" I shrugged my shoulders again. I had no proof anything was going to happen. "My gut." I mumbled and I swear there was a smile under his mask. "I know it's dumb but I just have a bad feeling Orochimaru isn't done yet." His eye hardened.

Pushing the book to the side I pulled my knees to my chest. Maybe I was still traumatized about what happened in the forest of death. Maybe it was all in my head. "It is good to listen to that little voice in the back of your head but you can't let it drive you crazy Suiren. If you think something is going to happen then don't forget it and keep your eyes open but don't let it take over everything you do." I nodded a bit. He was right and I thought that was what I had been doing up until this point. "Don't fall back on your training." I glanced back over to him. "I train every day sensei." He shook his head and tapped his temple. "Training your mind is just as important."

I understood what he was saying. I was meditating almost every day with Gai-sensei and now I wasn't mediating at all. Maybe my brain over did it from the lack of training to it. Like over using a muscles and it spraining on you. "There is a week left. Train your mind half of those days and you'll feel much better." I nodded and he ruffled my hair before getting up and going back over to make a fire.

When the sun started to dip I gathered around the fire with the others. I grabbed a ration pack and some fruit and started to eat. My body cried for the calories. "Tomorrow will be exactly a week till the finals." I glanced over at Kakashi. This last week went by so fast, almost too fast and I wasn't sure if I was ready yet. I glanced over to catch Sasuke smirk. Was he not worried at all or was he just concerned about fighting Gaara? "How do you think Naruto is doing?" I wondered if Kakashi knew anything but being up on this rock I was sure he was secluded from the world too. "I bet he is doing fine."

I took a bite of my banana, he did have a master on his side so that had to count for something. I stopped eating for a second, "What order are we going in?" I realized I only knew what Kakashi had told me and what information I was able to get from Shika and Sakura. "Well first will be Naruto and Neji's match. Then Sasuke and Gaara's and then then Shikamaru and the female sand ninja yours and Kankuro ." I nodded my head a bit, "What about Shino?" Kakashi glanced over his book, "He is supposed to fight whoever wins Shikamaru's match." I sighed a bit. "And then that winner will fight the winner of my match?" He eye smiled at me, "Correct."

"Great." I mumbled causing Sasuke to snicker. "You're not scared are you?" I snorted a laugh. He had to face Gaara and then either Neji or Naruto if he could win and he asked if I was scared? "Im not too worried, as long as I get through those two the final round should be a snap." I couldn't help but smirk. "How do you figure?" He said tracing the drawings out in his head. "Well I can either vs you, Gaara, Neji or Naruto. I've already spared against three out of the four so my odds are good." His eyes narrowed a bit. I was actually more worried about going up against Shika. He might be lazy but he was smart. To smart and I would have to be on my toes. First off I had to get through Kankuro, probably shouldn't count my chickens before they've hatched.

"You better not lose. I want to beat you in the finals myself." I chuckled but my insides burned. What a sight it would be, Uchiha against Uchiha. "Right back at you." I think I was more worried about him facing Gaara then anyone else. There was so much unknown about that sand ninja. The unknown was the scariest thing of all and the only thing I could remember clear as day was the smell of death on him.

The only thing I had to make sure I kept an eye on was that chakra. If there was anyone who could bring it out of me it would be Kankuro of the Suna. I just hope it wouldn't be a repeat of my preliminary match. If I slipped up and let that happened again there was no way I would get promoted to Chunin.

"What are they going to look most at during our match?" Kakashi's eye peeped over the book again. "Well it's really over all. How diverse and affective you're fighting style is as well as how you think in the midst of battle." I nodded my head. "It's not about who punches the hardest or has the strongest justus. A Chunin will be able to lead missions and have other ninja's lives in their hands. It's a big responsibly and only genin who are truly ready will pass." I frowned, the last 'mission' we had didn't go accordingly. During the second exam my team looked to me for leadership and I almost got everyone killed. Was I ready to lead a team into a real mission?

"How long will have to be a Chunin before I can join Anbu?" Instead of merely looking over his book he put it down. His eye looking into mine. I almost had to glance away from the intensity. "Why would you want to go and do a stupid thing like that?" I could tell he really didn't like the idea. "I want to protect my family and the Village sensei. That doesn't seem stupid to me." He sighed a bit and rubbed the back of his neck. "Anbu aren't like your average ninja. Anbu are recruited from their village's standard shinobi forces, hand-picked by their Kage for their individual capabilities and special skills. Age, background, gender, or previous ranks bear no significance in this decision." I thought about what he said. It was the Hokage's decision on who wasn't or was Anbu. I caught Sasuke shift uncomfortably. I could tell he wanted no part in the conversation.

"Anbu wear masks and use code names to conceal their identity with only the Hokage knowing. Anbu protect the village from exceptional threats, conduct high-risk missions into enemy territory, and deal with extremely strong ninja. They are also responsible for carrying out assassinations, tracking, surveillance, and missions requiring specially trained ninja and Anbu even serve as interrogators." He voice was almost robotic as he spoke. Like he was reading it straight form the dictionary. "So like Ibiki. He has special Anbu who work under him right?" I remembered the Hokage telling me about it before I had left. Kakashi nodded. His eye holding worry and I wasn't sure why. Wouldn't it be an honor to be chosen to be this kind of asset to one's village?

"Sometimes Anbu carry out mission or are asked to do things that a standard shinobi would find erroneous." He chose his words wisely and my head fell to the side, "But it's ultimately for the good of the village right?" He sighed a bit, "Well yes." I shrugged my shoulders, "Well then it wouldn't matter what anyone else would think." I caught him shaking his head slightly. "You don't think I have what it takes to be in Anbu? Do I only have an average skill set?" Kakashi shut his book completely and put it in his vest pocket. "It's not your skill set im worried about Suiren." I wasn't sure what the problem was then. "You need to really think about your choices because if you are asked to join the ranks of Anbu you can't just go back. It will change you forever and mostly it's not for the good." It was like I struck a nerve mentioning Anbu. I thought that I would get Kakashi-sensei's full endorsement to do this but it seemed he was more against it then ever.

"It's getting late." He added in before I could say anything else. Getting up he went over to the side of the peak where his bed roll was. "Night." I mumbled but if he heard me he didn't bother responding.