Season 1, Episode 1:
Laughter
I
The night air was chilly. It reeked of smoke from cigarettes and taxis. Car horns, truck engines, shouts, and whispers echoed to the rooftops.
Even with the filthy orchestra blaring in his cowl-covered ears, Matt could still hear every thwip. He could also hear his friend's heart thumping like a jackhammer in spite of his words.
"I don't know which I hate more; people who put up their Christmas lights too early, or people who keep wearing their costumes after Halloween,"
"Personally, I'm taking more grievances with the latter at the moment," Matt replied, leaping a building gap that had long ago been tattooed onto his memory.
He found Peter's sense of humor childish, but felt a welcoming relief in it. Having heard more than enough of Jessica's attitude, Marc's obsessing, and Frank's grit for a dozen lifetimes in only the last few weeks, a little humor helped Matt maintain his optimism. It also helped him relax as he and Peter, the lawyer and the photographer, Daredevil and the Amazing Spider-Man, dived into a gaggle of warring pumpkin-heads and clown-masks for the fourth time that evening.
"You see Osborn around, hornhead?" Spider-Man asked. "You know what I mean." There were two skyrocketing pulses, which plummeted suddenly after a collective cry; Spider-Man had clunked their heads together.
"No. Nothing," Daredevil answered. He smacked a taser out of a hand with one of his billy clubs, then roundhouse kicked his opponent into the wall beside the ATM they had been targeting.
"What about the leader of these clown guys?"
"No." The Man Without Fear leaped into the air, making a perfect split and knocking out a clown and a pumpkin-head.
"Don't see why you guys should fight," Spidey addressed the criminals. "You've got lots in common. You're all great at getting your asses kicked!"
Daredevil grasped the jaw of a charging clown, then turned him around and slammed him against the locked bank door.
"Don't suppose you know where a certain Green Goblin is?" The Devil of Hell's Kitchen growled through his teeth.
"Or perhaps the new player in town? This 'Joker' character?"
"I-I-I swear I don't know!" The clown spat, his voice betraying the hollow grin on his plastic mask.
Daredevil drew his billy club back, and tightened his grip on the clown's jaw.
"Th-Th-The Joker comes to us! I swear!"
Matt felt the vibrations of the clown's gloved hands desperately prying at his outstretched arm. Were it not for his enhanced senses, he likely would not have felt him at all.
Daredevil threw the clown onto the sidewalk.
"I'm telling the truth, man!"
"I believe you." Matt slammed his billy club down on the clown's skull.
Amidst the descending pulses as the gang members were either beaten into submission or knocked unconscious, Daredevil could hear several clusters of more excited pulses from further away. He could also hear cheers harmonizing with them.
"Go, Spidey!"
"Get 'em, Double-D!"
"Jameson's full 'a shit!"
"You guys are the real Avengers!"
Matt smiled as he struck one last clown with the end of his billy club.
"What the hell is Norman up to that he can't come out and play with us himself?" Peter asked as he webbed two pumpkin-heads to the wall beside the ATM.
"And why do he and this Joker, whoever he is, leave their cronies to fight for them. Well, I use 'fight' loosely…"
"Aw, you're not enjoying the party, Spider-Man?!" A twisted, mocking voice whined like some demented cartoon character from across the street.
Matt heard the voice's owner's pulse; a steady one that had blended with those of the cheering spectators and the nocturnal passers-by. There was a vehement flap, undoubtedly a coat being thrown off, and then an orchestra of screams, fleeing footsteps, and accelerating heartbeats.
"Look at that!" The Green Goblin cackled. "Kids sneak into the R-rated flicks, then run out screaming once it gets gorey!"
Daredevil heard a click, and then a series of quickening beeps flying through the air above the Goblin.
"No!" Peter exclaimed.
The two vigilantes charged forth.
"I'll keep Osborn busy!" Daredevil declared. "You take care of the grenade!"
"Way ahead of you!"
Thwip.
Matt heard Spider-Man's pulse soaring above him and the beeping getting faster and faster.
Daredevil ran for the Goblin, and could not help but be disturbed by the villain's heartbeat. Even the likes of Wilson Fisk, Bullseye, and Typhoid Mary had higher heart rates in the heat of a battle. Matt wondered how much of this eerie stolidity was the globulin green formula, and how much was the already-twisted mind of Norman Osborn.
There was a roar like a mechanical beast charging from behind Daredevil; this must be the glider Peter had told him about. The Devil of Hell's Kitchen leaped onto the groaning glider, and the Green Goblin joined him. Daredevil blocked a punch as they zipped above the rooftops.
There was a bang and a hot vibration a few feet away; Peter had thrown the pumpkin bomb high out of the range of any civilians, but only barely out of the range of the twisting, turning glider.
"Oh, crap! You okay, hornhead?!"
"I'll be better in a second! Just give me a hand!"
Daredevil aimed right hook at the Goblin's rubber-masked jaw, and received an elbow in the nose for his troubles.
He felt Spidey land behind the Goblin, but did not feel the glider dip even slightly at the added weight.
This thing could give Stark a run for his money, Daredevil thought.
"I didn't realize you boys were into this type of thing," The Goblin sneered as Spider-Man grabbed him in a bear hug.
Daredevil punched Osborn square in his pointed, rubbery nose, but it seemed to do little more than wipe away his ghastly grin for a moment. Matt could not see it, but he could feel its gaze, its chill, its mocking immortality.
The Goblin retaliated with a kick to Daredevil's gut that sent the Man Without Fear plummeting to the smoke-scented street below.
For a few seconds, Matt's body was on fire. The pavement crept up behind him like a falcon closing in on a soaring dove. He was blind, completely blind, for only those few seconds.
Then he reached out and grasped the frigid metal of a street lamp. He used the momentum from the fall to swing himself up, and then perched like a crimson gargoyle.
He listened, and found Peter and Osborn again instantly. This time, however, the mechanical groan was replaced by a rambunctious buzzing, and Daredevil heard both of the glider's passengers' pulses accelerate as the glider spun down towards the street.
Matt heard another thwip as Peter swung clear of the crash. He also heard the Goblin's boots landing gracefully on the pavement moments after the glider's screeching skid.
Daredevil listened closer, and found another new pulse. This one was the opposite of Osborn's; it was speedy like a basketball being dribbled by an unstoppable athlete, and anxious like a child in bed on Christmas Eve. Daredevil had heard a few heartbeats like this before; Bullseye, Typhoid Mary. But this strange person, if it was a person, was somehow different, somehow worse than any of the others.
The Man Without Fear was filled with a sickening sense of terror.
"You gotta get your own material, compadre!" The heartbeat's owner spoke with a malevolent rasp, like a clown laughing while gargling blood.
"Just because you turn the skin green and hop on a flying tray doesn't mean that you're not blatantly plagiarizing my schtick!"
"You!" Osborn growled. "You're one to talk! You think you invented the scary clown gimmick?! You're almost as bad as Kingsley!"
Matt heard a threatening click; another pumpkin bomb.
"And you'll find that I'm so much more than a man on a flying tray." The Goblin darted forth, hurling his projectile straight at the Joker.
From his vantage point, Matt could smell the humidity of colored smoke. This bomb was not deadly, but the Goblin's ensuing attack on the Joker was very much so. Two hooks were followed by a backflip kick, which put the Joker in mid-air. A leaping back kick sent the clown hurtling into a parked car, which began honking repeatedly while sprinkling glass shards onto the Joker's suit.
"Call me crazy…" Spider-Man said, landing beside Daredevil, who could feel the resulting vibrations through the metal pole.
"But if it weren't for all those pesky things like public safety, I'd probably just let them kill each other,"
Matt felt tempted by the idea, but he knew that it wouldn't be long before the Joker and Osborn grew tired of fighting, and instead decided to see who could kill more innocent civilians. Or more costumed vigilantes.
"You have more experience with the Goblin," Daredevil said. "You focus on him. This Joker, crazy as he is, seems like just a guy with a gun. My specialty,"
"Whatever you say, hornhead,"
The two heroes leaped at the two feuding criminals. Spider-Man landed on the Goblin's shoulders, then webbed up his eyes as he swiped blindly up at his opponent.
"Yee-haw!"
Daredevil brought his billy club down on the Joker's jaw as he landed. He followed through with an upward strike with the club in his opposite hand.
"All these comedians, and not a single original joke to be found!" The clown spat, rubbing his jaw.
"What's your handle, then? Red Batman? Batman Sans Cape?"
Before Matt could even try to understand, he heard a powerful engine screaming like the groan of a ravenous beast. He felt it through the pavement like an oncoming stampede.
Daredevil grabbed the Joker and bounded towards the sidewalk, moments before the thundering vehicle screeched to a halt right where they had been standing.
"And here's the guest of honor, ladies and germs!" The Joker cheered, and then his voice dropped to a malevolent, raspy snarl, like that of a gremlin.
"Careful, devil boy. Ol' Batsy doesn't like the other kids playing with his favorite toy,"
Matt stood his ground, keeping hold of the Joker, and ready for whatever would emerge from this demon of a vehicle.
Whoosh.
There was a cape-flapping sound that Daredevil knew well from the likes of Thor, Scarlet Witch, Storm, and Moon Knight, but even with his enhanced senses, this cape's sound was much softer than any of those others. The man, or creature, or thing that landed in front of Matt landed with expert silence; the Man Without Fear sensed him purely by the flapping cape and the faint but bitter scent of paint on metal armor.
Steps away, Spider-Man continued duelling his nemesis, ducking and dodging bolts of electricity while shooting web lines at any glove, boot, or mask that he could get a clear shot at.
The man from the monstrous car drew a device that clicked and then fired a wirey zipping noise. There was another click as something that sounded like a metal hook caught something, and then Matt heard the Goblin grunt as he was yanked backwards, dragged across the pavement, and then caught in the armored gloves of this mysterious new vigilante.
"Hey, come on, man!" Peter shouted. "It ain't right to steal another guy's villain!"
"Hand him over!" The thing ordered Daredevil, who heard a rubbery rip as the Goblin's mask was torn from his face.
"You insolent cretin!" Norman Osborn spat, his voice descending from an elfish cackle to the berating of a powerful and wealthy man.
"Do you know who you're-" Another clicking device silenced him. There was a mechanical hiss, and then Matt heard the Goblin's pulse drop exponentially.
"I won't ask again," The thing pressed.
"Are you friend or foe?" Matt questioned, holding the Joker's neck under his arm as the other vigilante held Osborn.
The clown's low but childish snicker nearly drowned out all other sounds.
"That all depends on whether or not you do as I say,"
"Now, now, kiddies," the Joker snarled gleefully. "You can both have a turn with your new toy-Ack!"
Before Daredevil could move, the zipping hook was coming his way. It clamped onto the Joker's face, offering Matt some minor relief as the haunting giggle was finally silenced. The clown was yanked out of Daredevil's arms with force that reminded him disturbingly of the Kingpin. Then there was a sound which Matt recognized as that of an elbow striking a skull, and the Joker's heartbeat, like his laughter, grew quiet.
"I don't have time for this!" The thing growled.
There was a mechanical whirr, the ruffling of two bodies being shoved into something like a car seat or trunk, another whirr, and then the heartbeats stopped. Daredevil knew they were still there; they were inside the demonic vehicle, which, to both his shock and curiosity, was soundproof.
The almost inaudible cape flapped again, and then the vehicle roared back to life. Matt and Peter ran after it, but it was already a block away after their first step.
"Aw, that's alright," Spider-Man yelled after the car. Daredevil heard his web shooter click instead of thwip as the vehicle shrank into the distance.
"We'll call you!"
"You got a tracer on him?" Matt asked.
"Yeah. I'll follow up on our new friend later," Peter answered. Matt heard fabric rustling as his friend lifted his glove to check the quantity of his web fluid.
"I'd say it's nice to finally have Norman and that Joker guy dealt with, but you know what? I can't shake the feeling that Count Dracula back there was in cahoots with them, faking their capture so they can plan something big without pesky pests like us on their asses,"
"I have the same suspicion," Matt replied.
"Don't suppose his heartbeat told you anything?"
Daredevil said nothing. He faced the distance where he had last heard the beastly roar of the thing's vehicle, felt the heat and smelled the fuel of its thrusters in the moment it was near him. He did not want to tell Peter about the thing's heartbeat, about how it concerned him much more than the relaxation of Norman Osborn's or the speed of the Joker's.
He could not hear the thing's heart.
II
Dear Mr. Mudock and Mr. Nelson,
"Nelson and Murdock, please hold…"
I wanted to thank you again for everything you've done for me.
"Nelson and Murdock, with you in a sec…"
After my accident I was scared that nobody would help me. I thought they'd just say it was my fault.
"Nelson and Murdock, one moment please…"
But you showed me that I have more friends than I think, and for that I can't thank you enough.
"Nelson and Murdock, how can I help you?"
I'll send you guys my payment next week when I get paid. Keep doing what you're doing. There's lots more people out there like me who need your help.
"I'm sorry, we're all booked up today and tomorrow, but we can squeeze you in on Thursday,"
See you around. Signed, Phillip.
"Would Friday work, then?"
Matt did his best to drown out Foggy and the telephones as he ran his fingers along the braille letter. Doing so was hard enough while blind, with audio being one's primary perception of the world alongside touch, but when one also had radioactively enhanced hearing, the difficulty was doubled.
He had done this enough to be used to it, just as he had grown used to the smell of smoke in the streets and the sensation of being stabbed.
Though the boisterous bustling of Nelson and Murdock's Law Offices filled Matt with anxiety, the words under his fingers brought him an oasis of comfort. He smiled, and decided he had looked at enough paperwork from now, and got up from his desk to go help Foggy with the callers.
A phone buzzed just as he sat up, but it wasn't one that Foggy was juggling. It was Matt's cell phone. He pulled it out, and listened to the bland, unengaged voice of the text-to-speech program.
"Peter. 1007 Mountain Drive, Gotham City," The phone said in perhaps the worst impression of Peter Parker that could ever exist. Another buzz.
"Peter. Huge place. Rich guy. Thinking Dracula really in cahoots w/ Osborn and Joker,"
Matt initially thought about letting Peter handle it himself. It was his nemesis after all; Daredevil had mainly helped deal with the warring gangs out of heroic duty. And he had responsibilities as Matthew Murdock, as well. Then he remembered the caped thing in the monstrous car, and its speed and its powerful hook and its armor so thick it did not even release a single heartbeat. The Green Goblin was already dangerous enough by himself, as Daredevil had recently discovered first-hand. But with this thing by his side, Spider-Man barely had a chance.
And Matt knew that Peter would do the same for him.
"On my way," He said into the phone before sliding it back into his pocket. He reached under his desk to retrieve his walking stick and his briefcase, containing everything he needed for work; papers, contracts, statements, billy clubs, costume, cowl.
No sooner had he stood back up did his phone buzz again.
"Peter. Take the train,"
Another buzz.
"Peter. I'll try to save some for you,"
Matt chuckled as he passed Foggy's desk.
"I'm gonna go visit some clients," He said, patting his old friend on the shoulder. "You okay to hold down the fort?"
"Don't worry about it," Foggy replied, his voice rising immediately from a breathless drone to a friendly chirp.
"I'll just be here breaking the world record for most simultaneous phone conversations,"
Matt laughed again as he left the office, hearing the ringing and the repetition of, "Nelson and Murdock," until he was down the stairs and out the door.
III
Matt thought that it would have been nice of Peter to mention that Gotham was in New Jersey.
That wasn't all that was strange about the caped thing's address. Matt wondered why he had never heard of the city before. Though his life was filled with concerns infinitely greater than the names of cities in New Jersey, he was still bothered by the complete absence of any memory of even a passing mention of the name Gotham.
When Matt transferred from train to taxi, he discovered that it wasn't just the city he was unfamiliar with. When he told the driver his destination, he was met with intrigue at why someone "like him" was going to visit "the big billionaire" Bruce Wayne. All Matt had said was that he had some questions for a case. After all, that was the truth. More or less.
When he was finally dropped off at 1007 Mountain Drive, Matt almost thought that the cabbie had played some kind of prank on him. He walked for at least two minutes, drumming his walking stick along the pavement (which he couldn't help but notice was considerably less cracked than the rest of the city.), until he finally found a bottom step.
"You like to make sure people get their exercise, don't you, Mr. Wayne?" Matt muttered as he ascended to the door.
He went to knock, and his fist hit a handle of cold metal; one of those old door-knockers.
Perhaps Count Dracula was more than Peter's nickname for the caped thing, this Bruce Wayne.
Knock-knock-knock.
It wouldn't have taken enhanced hearing to hear that even from the deepest room. Matt thought that Foggy had heard it back at the office.
He heard footsteps. Hasty footsteps. The door creaked open, and Matt was greeted by a quick and unnerved pulse beneath the old voice of a calm Englishman.
"Good afternoon," He said.
Matt smiled. If it weren't for the pulse, this man would be a phenomenal liar. He was clearly putting up a front for his boss, who was most definitely contending with Spider-Man somewhere in the innermost sanctums of the manor. All Matt had to do was keep up the guise of the investigating lawyer until he could find his friend.
"You must be the devil chap," The man added, still sounding calm in spite of his heartbeat.
Matt's smile vanished. In all of either of his careers as lawyer or vigilante, he had never been silenced so swiftly. As he stood there at the steps of the gothic manner, this stoic Englishman's words echoing in his ears, he felt not only blind, but mute.
"Master Bruce told me about your encounter last night," The man continued. "Why don't you come in? Your arrival, as it happens, is most convenient,"
"Tell me where my friend is first," Matt said, now feeling very much like the man in front of him as he controlled his own disposition.
"Your spider friend is downstairs," The Englishman answered. "Working alongside Master Bruce to fend off the Joker and some new goblin menace,"
"Well…" Matt said. "That sounds about right." He entered.
The end of his cane echoed against the marble floor.
"You'll forgive my being blunt, I hope," The man said.
The creaking of a shutting door was followed by a click which Matt recognized as that made by a shotgun. He almost spun around to defend himself, but he did not hear anymore clicks besides the one the weapon made when being picked up.
"But having the likes of the Joker in the cave is a serious infestation," The Englishman continued. "And I should like to be rid of it as soon as possible,"
"Don't worry about it, Mr…?"
"Alfred Pennyworth," The man answered. "But we may save the formalities until the matter at hand has been dealt with. I trust that you've brought your uniform,"
Matt lifted his case.
"I shall allow you a minute to 'suit up', as they say,"
"Thank you, Alfred," Matt replied. Alfred's calmness was contagious; Matt found himself almost forgetting that Peter was trapped somewhere within this enormous building battling both the Joker and the Green Goblin. Or, rather, he found himself almost forgetting that he should be worried about it, that it was a danger and not an everyday occurrence.
Matt wondered, then, if this was not worthy of Alfred Pennyworth's utmost panic, what was?
"You said something about a cave?"
IV
The cold, damp air told Daredevil that he was in a cavern. The quiet clank of the steel beneath his boots told him that he was in a facility.
As he descended the metallic steps down to the hidden lair of what Alfred called 'the Batman', he still heard the butler's anxious pulse alongside the soft clicking of his shotgun.
Daredevil expected to hear the sounds of battle. The thwip of Spider-Man's webbing, blasting gunshots, the bursts of pumpkin bombs, the maniacal and haunting laughter of the Joker and the Green Goblin. But there wasn't so much as one of Peter's sarcastic comments.
All he heard was heartbeats. Excruciatingly fast heartbeats.
"What's happened?" Alfred whispered. "When I was last in here, just a few minutes ago, it was chaos,"
"They're still here," Daredevil replied, slowing his pace. Alfred did likewise.
"I can hear them...Spider-Man, Bruce Wayne...The Goblin, the Joker…"
There was another heartbeat behind them.
"Alfred-"
Something struck Alfred. Daredevil heard him falling against the metal railing. The thing landed in front of the Man Without Fear, but before he could attack, something like cold steam was sprayed into his face.
The damp aroma of the cavern became chilly. Coarse. Sweaty.
"Put 'em up, son!"
Matt was pelted across the jaw by something firm and rubbery. A boxing glove.
He stood right back up, his mind reeling with panic and denial. Please, God, let it be anyone else. Anything else.
Another blow. Not just any boxing glove.
"Come on, Matty! I know you can do better! I've seen you do better!"
"...Dad?"
"All that trainin' with Stick, all those trials against the Hand," This, without a doubt, was the haggered yet determined voice of Battlin' Jack Murdock; a voice Matt had not heard for twenty seven years.
"A little guy like me should be easy pickings for you. The big bad Devil of Hell's Kitchen,"
"No...No, this can't be real," Matt said. "You're dead. I know you're dead!"
Another punch, right in the cheek. No boxing glove this time, but the fist was so big that a glove would have been redundant. A ring hit a tooth through Matt's cheek, and immediately he recognized that familiar and condescending sting.
Wilson Fisk, the Kingpin.
"Did that feel real, Matty?" Battlin' Jack shouted.
"Fisk…" Matt coughed. "I know that's you!" He didn't know how the Kingpin could possibly have entered the Batcave, or how he was mimicking his father's voice, but he knew that he was. He must be.
He must be.
"Fisk's still in jail, son, right where you left him," Battlin' Jack replied. "It's just you and me. Father and son,"
Matt was struck again, this time by a leather glove he knew all too well from Frank Castle, the Punisher.
What shocked and terrified him, though, was that this fist, like Fisk's and his father's just before, had been a right one. Matt considered that it was simply multiple right-handed assailants, but he could only hear one heart pounding away in front of him.
"Come on, now! Put your fists up! I won my last fight for you, Matty! You damn well better win this one for me!"
The next punch came as quick as a bullet, and its haunting speed reminded Matt of the chilling precision of Bullseye.
"Deny it all you want, son, but this is real, whether you like it or not!"
Matt was struck by a four-hit combo; two hooks and two uppercuts. Bullseye, Punisher, Kingpin, Battlin' Jack. He was on his back. Before he could get up, he was pinned down with something sharp at his throat. It felt like a knife, but considering what everything else felt like, it could just as easily have been a dragon's claw.
"Disappointing, Matty," Battlin' Jack said through his teeth as Daredevil struggled against his Fisk, Castle, Bullseye-esque hands.
"But then I was always a disappointment to you, wasn't I? So I guess this makes us even,"
Matt pried at the hands with all his might. Whatever was holding him down, the sharp thing at his adam's apple was definitely real. His senses were overwhelmed with the smell of boxing ring sweat, the smoothness of a well-pressed suit, the repugnant smoke from gunfire and grenades and flamethrowers and rocket launchers, the chill of sharpened steel, and the pounding of an exhilarated heart.
The heartbeat.
That had to be real. Even if all the other sensations were false, there had been a heartbeat before, and it had not changed since.
Matt listened, listened for his life.
There was a heartbeat. He did not know whose it was, but he knew whose it was not.
It was not Bullseye.
It was not Castle.
It was not Fisk.
It was not Battlin' Jack Murdock.
Daredevil was able to gain enough leverage to bring his elbow into his attacker's jaw. After a firm kick to the gut, he was free.
"I'll hand it to you," He said as he stood up, regaining his breath. "I was almost scared for minute,"
"Oh, but you will be," A voice nothing like Matt's father's growled. It was deep and hoarse and muffled by something like burlap.
"Who are you?" Daredevil questioned. "And what have you done with my friend?"
"I am merely a curious man of science, but many know me as the Scarecrow." The attacker's voice came from down low, as if he were crouching. Matt was beginning to think of this Scarecrow as less of a man and more of a beast.
"Your friend is nearby, as is my dear old friend, the Batman. They are helping me with some critical research while I conduct my own experiment up here…"
There was series of menacing clicks. Knives? No; syringes.
"You are perhaps my most fascinating subject to date. A man without fear...Do not worry; I shall cure you,"
Daredevil felt the Scarecrow charging forth, and raised his fists to defend himself.
BLAM!
The Scarecrow was smothering a scream with his teeth, and the air was tainted with the hot scents of blood and gunpowder.
"Alfred!"
"In my defense, sir," Alfred said with all the panic of a man who had just squished a fly. "He was charging at you with every intent to inject you with an even deadlier dose of his dreadful fear toxin. He is also trespassing on private property and threatening a very dear friend of mine. Not to mention the myriad of even more heinous crimes he has committed for many years. Besides, it's only a leg. I could have gotten him in the head, but I did not think you or Master Bruce would approve,"
Daredevil opened his mouth to retort, but said nothing. Alfred seemed to have already responded to any possible argument.
"He's right," Scarecrow sneered, his breathing heavy. "I've come back from much worse than this. Your friends, however…" He laughed softly, as if he were about to deliver a twisted punchline, but he only kept laughing.
There was the thick smell of smoke, and then the Scarecrow's laughter and his relaxed heartbeat were gone.
"We'd best be on our way," Alfred said. "Our friends needs us,"
The butler and the Man Without Fear set off for the depths of the Batcave quicker than they had entered.
Daredevil kept a hand on Alfred's shoulder. He knew that they were in a facility, but he could still smell the sweat of a gymnasium.
V
"Why did you kill me, Peter?"
"I'm sorry…"
"Why didn't you save me, Bruce?"
"I'm so sorry…"
"Why did you kill me, Peter?"
"Oh, God, I'm sorry…"
"Why didn't you save us, Bruce?"
"Forgive me…"
The hero of New York and the Dark Knight of Gotham were on their knees, their palms flat against the hull of the Batmobile, doing nothing to defend themselves from the monsters in front of them.
A beast with long blonde hair and the wrinkled face of an old man breathed into Peter's face. Its body was a mess of limbs, some old and thick and others young and slender. They melted into one another like the wax of a melting candle.
"Why couldn't you save me, Peter…?"
"I'm sorry, Gwen...I'm sorry, Uncle Ben…"
A creature with three heads hovered menacingly above Bruce. The head in the middle was divided down the middle, one half black-haired and handsome, the other half white-haired and hideously scarred. It was as if parts of two different faces had been sewn together. The other two heads were skulls, coated in the crustiness of long-rotted skin. Their healthiest parts were their cracked red eyeballs, which were like torches branding Bruce's flesh. Its body was a bloodied and ripped red uniform, with a golden letter R on its left side.
"Why couldn't you save us, Bruce…?"
"Mother...Father...Harvey...Jason...Forgive me. Please…"
The creatures were each held back by a leash, held by two men like the villainous ringmasters of a nightmarish circus.
One had pitch black skin, with wide white eyes and a humongous jaw home to teeth of the same color. It wore a shirt of green stripes. From its back stemmed a long, pointed tail hovering like a snake homing in on a mouse, as well as a tremendous pair of feathery wings, and a quartet of long, metal tentacles ending in claws that surrounded Peter like a volt of vultures.
The other's face was hidden beneath a black mask with piercing red eyes. It wore a tuxedo, with vines entwining, caressing every limb. It also had a green cape stretching down to the floor, and it gripped a sword in its left hand.
"Why did you kill me, Peter?"
"Why didn't you save us, Bruce?"
"I'm so sorry…"
The monsters only laughed.
Bruce and Peter only sobbed.
There was a pair of crunching strikes, and the laughter was replaced by grunts.
Peter and Bruce looked up, finding that their oppressors had been knocked to the floor.
The two misshapen beasts looked to the new players, as did the two reduced heroes.
Reed Richards and Diana Prince.
Mr. Fantastic, however, was donning iron armor of crimson and gold, and carried a round shield of red, white, and blue bearing the comforting and inspiring image of a star.
Wonder Woman wore a red uniform with gold gloves and boots, and where Bruce expected to find a sharp and triumphant W, he instead found an equally heroic S.
VI
Daredevil and Alfred stood back-to-back as the Joker and the Green Goblin stood back up.
Matt kept an ear out for the two creatures still standing over Spider-Man and Batman. One of them was freezing, like a reptile; Matt wondered how it was even alive. The other one, Matt could not tell what it was, but he thought he smelled something like leather in the space under its arms. He was certain it couldn't be possible, that it must be only a remnant of the fear toxin's effects, but he thought that the creature had wings. There was also some kind of electric buzzing emitting from both of their necks.
"Master Bruce keeps antidotes for Crane's fear toxin on reserve," Alfred said, still calm but more vehement than before.
"If you can hold off these cretins, I can have it dispelled through the ventilation system,"
Do it," Daredevil responded. He felt Alfred break away, and heard the butler's heart hammering as his shoes did likewise against the metal floor.
"Looks like the butler did you, Jester," The Green Goblin snickered as he stood up.
"Oh, come on, Norman!" The Joker spat. "I'd expect better material from you!"
"And I'd expect both of you to get on with it!" Daredevil snapped. "Either give it up or start telling me what you've got planned!"
"Oh, not much planned this time, horny," The clown sneered. "Just some personal biz between us four, with some help from the kind doctor sackface. And, if I may say, it's very rude of you to butt in,"
"So you two have formed a truce?" Daredevil questioned. "Or was the gang war just an act all along? To lure out Spider-Man and Batman and get them right where you wanted?"
"Seems like our local Bram Stoker fan isn't the only detective around here," The Green Goblin said. Daredevil could hear a repeated clicking sound, like a device being tossed up and then caught in Osborn's hand.
"What I don't understand is why you two would work together," The Man Without Fear asked, his hands moving down to his billy clubs.
"Don't get me wrong; you're made for each other, but why would you bother crossing into another city's criminal underworld to help beat another city's hero? Especially if it's a city that I swear to God I'd never heard of until now!"
"Well, maybe you're just ignorant, Litewing," the Joker laughed. "And we could tell you...But honestly, I'm getting a little bored with this act."
There was a beep each from the Joker's and the Goblin's hands, followed by the buzzing of an electric shock. The creatures hovering over Spider-Man and Batman roared in agony, and then lunged at Daredevil.
Matt barely caught each chin as he felt the hot, moist breath from each set of chomping jaws that snapped at his face.
The one in his right hand was rough, like scales. Matt remembered more than once hearing on the news, or from Peter himself, of Spider-Man's many encounters with the unfortunate Dr. Curt Connors' alter ego; an enormous reptilian beast fittingly dubbed the Lizard. Matt was confident that this was the same Lizard whose saliva was now spraying onto his cowl.
In his left hand was a long neck coated in fur. Matt could also hear a leathery flapping from the creature's arms, and felt a breeze with each repetition, confirming his earlier suspicion of wings despite his continued disbelief. The creature also roared with a high-pitched shriek into Matt's face, reminding him of similar, albeit meeker shrieks he had heard from bats in the filthiest alleyways of Hell's Kitchen. If the other was a man transformed into a Lizard, then this man was mutated into a bat. A Man-Bat.
The monsters each grasped one of Daredevil's arms, lifting him up as if preparing him for crucifixion.
Matt smelled the putridity of sewage, humid breath, and beyond that, mint as the first drops of the fear antidote filled the room.
Beyond that, though, were hungry growls, electric buzzes, and hysterical, psychotic laughter.
The Man Without Fear struggled against the crushing claws as the boisterous and suffocating choir around him made him deaf.
"Langstrom!"
"Curt!"
Something pulled the monsters away, and Daredevil was freed.
"Are you two alright?" He asked, drawing his billy clubs.
"Never better, hornhead!" Spider-Man called from the screeching Man-Bat's back.
"Now, you relax, batty, okay? I'm gonna get this itchy collar off of ya." Peter strained, as did the buzzing metal around Man-Bat's neck. Another firm yank, and the collar shattered, and the screeching dropped to a relieved breath.
"Get the Joker and the Goblin!" Batman ordered, driving something sharp into the Lizard's collar, silencing the reptile's roars.
"We'll join you once we're done here!"
"On it!" Daredevil turned to the Green Goblin, knowing he was the more formidable combatant.
There was a relaxed heartbeat in front of him. Behind him, there was a mechanical roar beneath an ecstatic pulse.
Daredevil jumped, landing on the glider with the Joker right beside him. Seconds later, the Green Goblin joined them.
"You feeling snug in there, redsy?" The Joker snickered.
There was the clicking of a switchblade and the buzzing of a taser.
Daredevil blocked each oncoming strike with a swift swing of a billy club. The hits kept coming, and he kept blocking, tiring but keeping his commendable speed up. It was challenging with the speed of the glider coalescing with that of the villains' weapons, but not impossible for the Devil of Hell's Kitchen.
The Joker's knife cut through his costume. The Goblin's electrified hand barely singed his cheek. Daredevil fended off these attacks despite their slipping through the cracks of his defense. He moved faster, and went for a strike of his own when he could, but the villains blocked them and attacked more fiercely.
He got an elbow into the Joker's nose. The clown shouted before reverting back to his typical chilling laughter.
"Joke's on you! I've been hit so many times I can't feel my own face anymore!"
Daredevil stopped the Goblin's arm on his billy club, but then Osborn twisted around it and grabbed his throat.
"That was a bit of fun, kitchen boy," The Goblin sneered. "But now we have to get back to work!" With a single shove, Daredevil was sent plummeting to the metal floor.
It occurred to Matt that he had lost track of how high the glider had taken him. He also did not know if he was above metal floor or the dark, empty depths of the cavern below.
He reached out, and found nothing but wind rushing away from him.
He could smell the antidote all around him, and yet his fear was mind shattering.
He was blind.
He reached out and caught nothing.
Truly blind.
Something caught him.
The wind halted and Daredevil gasped all of his breath away.
His legs dangled beneath him. He had been falling for a few seconds, and still it seemed like ground, if there was any ground directly under him, was still a ways away.
Something was clutching his shoulders. Hands? No; claws. He could hear a gust of wind on either side of him every other second. He reached up with both hands and touched fur. He was in the clutches of the Man-Bat. Instead of screeching, however, the creature was silent, and its claws threatened to do nothing more than keep the Man Without Fear safely where he was. The buzzing of the electric collar was nowhere to be found. Daredevil sighed with relief; the Man-Bat was on his side.
"Get off, you stupid beast!" The Green Goblin demanded from somewhere in front of Daredevil and Man-Bat.
"My glider can't support your weight!"
"I told you we should've sprung for Croc!" The Joker shouted. "Same intelligence but much more cooperative!"
Something was holding onto the glider, making it droop as its mechanical roar became a whine. The Man Without Fear listened and recognized the menacing growl of the Lizard.
Daredevil tapped on Man-Bat's ankle.
"Swing me into them," He said.
The creature made a curt grunt in response.
Daredevil felt his stomach drop as they ascended. For the seconds he was allowed, he relished in that pleasant, almost joyous variation of fear.
Man-Bat swung his legs forwards, throwing the Devil of Hell's Kitchen, who made an X with his billy clubs before breaking it, smacking both distracted villains off of the glider.
Daredevil landed on the hovering machine. He felt the glider rise as the Lizard dropped to the floor, and then he heard a wirey zip and a thwip as the Joker and the Goblin fell to the floor.
"Wouldja lookit these here varmints a've lassoed!" Spider-Man declared in a mock Texan accent.
There was no clanking impact; Daredevil heard the two binded villains grunt as they landed in the arms of their nemeses.
"I'm getting sick of this, Joker!" Batman growled. "I can't have you threatening me in my own home! And I can't have you using my friend as your personal hound!"
"Oh, I know, Batsy! I know very well!" The Joker cackled, and then his voice dropped to a raspy whisper. Even up on the glider, the clown's whisper was like a snake hissing in Daredevil's ear.
"But what are ya gonna do about it?"
Daredevil could smell smoke, as if everyone in New York had lit a cigarette at the same time.
The Joker laughed.
The Green Goblin laughed.
The two laughs harmonized, like a single demented voice cackling to the sky.
"Why did you kill me, Peter?"
"Why didn't you save us, Bruce?"
"Disappointing, Matty!"
The Scarecrow laughed.
Daredevil stepped back, his senses smothered once again in the sweat and the dampness of a gymnasium. He almost fell off the glider, but was kept upright by a gentle push from the Man-Bat's foot.
He listened for heartbeats. Peter, Bruce, Man-Bat, Lizard, and Alfred walking towards them.
But the Joker, the Goblin, and the Scarecrow were gone.
Daredevil listened to Peter and Bruce's heartbeats. They were speeding, but dropping bit by bit.
As did his own heart.
VII
"So...That was the side effect of your cure for deafness?" Matt asked, leaning against the Batcomputer console before taking a sip of tea.
The Man-Bat nodded, perched on a nearby railing in front of Matt, who heard the creature sip his own tea.
"...You know, I have excellent hearing. Superhuman, actually...Perhaps my DNA would be safer than a bat's?"
The Man-Bat grunted. Matt heard his wing flap in the space in front of his face. His eyes.
"Oh," Matt smiled himself. "Yeah. That's just a trade, isn't it?"
He turned to Peter, who stood right beside the icy form of the Lizard. Despite the chilling presence of Dr. Curt Connors, Matt couldn't help but feel warmed at how close Peter stood to him.
"How did Osborn get a hold of you, Doc?" Peter asked his friend.
"Sssent Ssscarecrow…Found me in sssewers..." The Lizard answered. His voice, to Matt's intrigue, was less discomforting than the Joker's.
"Fear gasss...Made me see Billy…Gave Ssscarecrow the chanccce to capture me. He already had Dr. Langssstrom. Put collarsss on usss. Let Osssborn and the clown control usss. Made usss come here,"
"This wasn't the first time that poor Dr. Langstrom found his way into the Batcave," Alfred added. Matt heard a clink as the butler picked up the tray with the kettle.
"Supposedly, the Joker or the Scarecrow found out about this, and used it to their advantage,"
"Alfred contacted me shortly after our encounter last night," Bruce said to Matt. From the direction of his voice, and the constant clicking of computer keys, Matt knew that Bruce was looking at a screen and not at him.
"I intended to take the Joker and the Goblin straight to Arkham Asylum here in Gotham City. I couldn't risk the Batcave being breached, so I headed back here to deal with Langstrom, Connors, and anyone who had followed them in. My mistake was leaving the Joker and the Goblin unattended in the Batmobile. Turns out it was all an elaborate scheme to get in here and attack me; the gang war to get them captured together by me, and to throw off suspicion of their alliance, and Langstrom and Connors as a distraction so they could get in here,"
"I took the doctors' way in sometime after," Peter continued. "Not sure if they had planned that or not...It's hard to tell with Osborn,"
"There's just one thing I don't understand," Matt began, standing up and approaching Bruce, who still did not look at him.
"What is this place? This city? I've never heard of this Gotham before,"
"Neither have I," Peter added.
"Nor I," The Lizard said.
"We've never heard of Gotham, and we've never heard of you," Matt lifted a finger from his cup to point at Bruce.
"And in our line of work, people like you tend to get noticed sooner or later, but clearly you've been at this for ages,"
"The same goes for you," Bruce replied. "Because, while I have heard of New York, I've never heard any mention of you three, or the Avengers, or the X-Men, or the Fantastic Four, or any of the other costumed heroes you've told me about. And yet, I'm still able to pull up an endless amount of news articles and images of them, as if they'd existed all along. And, like you said, my line of work has me meeting each of these unique individuals in turn,"
"Perhaps it's another part of the Joker and the Goblin's plan," Matt suggested. "Or a side effect of the Scarecrow's fear toxin,"
"Perhaps," Bruce said.
There was silence for everyone except Matt, who had a choir of pulses to listen to. None of them were even remotely close to the rates they had reached before, but they were each jogging with anxiety.
Finally, Dr. Connors broke the silence.
"What did the Ssscarecrow make you all ssseee?" He asked. "If you don't mind my asssking…His toxin fassscinates me,"
Another short silence, which Peter volunteered to break.
"I saw some...Old friends. Friends who are gone now,"
"I saw my dad," Matt said. He felt Peter's warm gaze.
"Me too," Bruce replied.
Matt looked to the Batman, knowing that he was now looking at him. His gaze was not warm like Peter's, or burning like Elektra's, or freezing like Bullseye's. It was not a feeling that Matt knew well. The closest comparison he could make was Frank Castle; not the ruthless executioner known as the Punisher, but the scarred and beaten spirit of a man ripped of his humanity. But even that wasn't quite right. He thought about his father, and about the elder Wayne who the Scarecrow had shown to the Batman, the Dark Knight of Gotham City.
Perhaps this gaze was the one Matt would have had if he could see.
Matt opened his mouth to speak, but then he felt something like a fist-sized bullet rip through his back and burst from his chest.
As he screamed, he heard ripping from the others around him, and they harmonized with him.
It was agonizing. It was worse than any beating from the Kingpin, or any stabs or lashes from the Hand. And yet Matt could not smell any blood, nor could he feel any wounds.
"Are my test subjects ready for phase two of our experiment?" The Scarecrow snarled. Matt could not find the source of his voice.
"That was just a little warm-up, so our new business partner could see if you guys are really worth the effort!" The Green Goblin exclaimed. The voices were all around Matt, as if he were trapped in a circle of towering speakers on maximum volume.
"Not that you ever need to prove anything to me, Spidey, old friend!"
"This is the big one, dearies! I think even you'll get a laugh out of it, Batsy!" The Joker cackled. His laugh seemed to be inside Matt's head, battering his eardrums from within.
"Do not be afraid…" A woman's voice, like something out of a fairy tale. It was soft, and it slithered through Matt's ears even slimier than the Joker's laugh. The thundering echo still hammered against Matt's skull.
"I think you will find the experience to be quite...Exhilarating,"
Matt turned his head as best as he could, trying to look over his shoulder to see who or what had ripped through him.
He felt hollow, as if something inside of him had been stolen. In its place was only cold.
He turned and saw a figure shrouded in shadow.
He saw a whale crashing into the ocean.
He saw an old man picking wheat in a field.
He saw a comet pass by the stars.
He saw everything.
He felt nothing.
LAUGHTER, or DC x Marvel
Season 1, Episode 1
NEXT TIME ON JUSTICE LEAGUE INFINITE!
A book of the dead, never meant for the world of the living! A stylish demon hunter on his latest assignment! A half-demon in command of an army of darkness! And a department store clerk with a shotgun and a chainsaw!
Who ya gonna call?!
Coming soon!