Chapter 29

Small Heath - Birmingham

Thursday Feb. 12, 1920

Grace POV

She hadn't seen Tommy around the last few days. He'd returned from a trip to London, apparently to see the Camden Town man and seemed to just disappear. Granted she couldn't keep watch on his coming and going constantly. She needed to work in order to pay for the flat she was renting and to have food to eat.

She was at work now repairing a woman's dress. The hem had come undone at the seam so it was an easy fix, just time consuming. As she worked the needle evenly through the fabric she thought back on her last interaction with Tommy.

She'd been walking home after her visit to the market to pick up essentials and the handle on her basket had finally given way. She hadn't planned it but it had turned out to be perfect timing as Tommy had been coming out of the building she'd been in front of. He'd always been a bit of a gentleman and when he'd seen her he'd let out a soft sigh before coming over and helping her pickup her spilled items.

Looking at the basket he'd shaken his head before picking it up. "Come on then Grace, I'll help ya home."

"Really you don't have to Tommy, it's my own fault I've known the damn basket was on its last leg."

He'd finally really looked at her, into her eyes, studying her face. She still couldn't see past the wall he'd erected against her but at least he'd finally looked at her.

"...Grace. I said I'll help ya home."

She'd nodded and given a him a small thankful smile, one that she knew had once given him enjoyment.

"It's just down the lane off of Fazely Street."

He nodded at her and they started walking. When they got to her building he carried her things up the stairs to her flat. She hadn't wanted him to leave right away and so she'd tried to make conversation.

"It's not much of a place really."

"It's all right."

"Would you like some tea?"

"Tea? No."

"I have some rum?"

"That's all right Grace, I don't want anything. Where would ya like me to put this?"

"The tables fine Tommy."

"Right."

After he'd set the broken basket down he'd taken a more in depth survey of her one room flat. His voice was quiet, soft, almost as though he was speaking his thoughts out loud and not meaning to.

"It's better than the place ya lived last time you were in Small Heath."

"It is. Do you remember how the door would stick and I'd have to do that pattern of twisting the knob and knocking my hip into the side before it'd open?"

Grace noted a tiny quirk of his lips as he recalled what she was speaking of.

"Aye. It was always amusing watching ya do that."

"We had some good times didn't we Tommy? Some good memories."

"...Aye we did Grace."

"Do you ever think of them... of me?"

His sigh was quiet as she watched him close his eyes and tilt his head back, revealing the long line of his throat. His head slowly shaking just a bit from side to side. He righted his posture and when he opened his eyes he was looking at her and his walls were finally down. She could see him again.

"Grace... We're not doin this. I already told ya, we can't."

His tongue swept out to moisten his dry lips.

"Why not Tommy? Because of Lizzie? Can you honestly tell me that her past doesn't bother you? That you're in love with her?"

He took a deep slow breath before he answered her.

"Everyone has a past Grace, why should I hold hers against her? I didn't hold yours against you did I..."

This time his scoff was loud in the room.

"Who's to say that the past I know of yours is even real. As I recall I'd called ya out on lying to me about working in that pub in Dublin. Ya never answered, because I did for ya. I was the one that came up with the idea that ya were an upper class girl from a good family that had gotten herself in trouble, and having a wee one on your own had ruined ya, so you'd found your way here... I said that, not you. I somehow doubt my version held any truth to it either."

"Tommy...You were right in some ways. I was from a good family and obviously I wasn't innocent you'd have known if I was the first time we were together. I was never pregnant, it wasn't getting into trouble that way that sent me running from home. My parents were... my Father was a respectable man that stood against the IRA. They killed him for it, my mother had been with him when it happened, they killed her too. I had no one left and just wanted to get away from it all."

"Would it really have been that hard to tell me that back then?"

This time she was the one that scoffed. "Tommy, you had IRA members coming into the Garrison wanting private meetings with you."

"I recall. I also recall you asking me if I had sympathies for them and me telling ya I didn't have sympathies for anyone."

"...I didn't know if I could trust you at the time... by the time I realized I could you already believed an alternative version of my past. I didn't see the harm in letting you think you were right about me being in the family way, after all you didn't care, it didn't change the way you looked at me. Didn't change you wanting me in your own bed."

"No it didn't, but it was still a lie."

"Like you never lied? You lie all the time if it'll get you what you want."

"In business, yes. In my personal life, no. I never lied to ya about me self, hell I never even lied to ya bout business, if I didn't want ya to know something I just didn't tell ya."

"...Omission Tommy is still a lie."

"In a way I suppose. I need someone in my life that I don't have to lie to or even omit to Grace. Our past together already proves that that is not you."

She had moved toward him then, aware that she was losing the foothold she needed. He didn't move away from her, just stood there like a statue watching her.

She slowly lifted her hand to cup his cheek.

"You said yourself that we are not the same people we were. We can start over and we can do it right this time. No lies, no need for you to keep the truth from me. I can help you Tommy, with all of it."

She leaned in closer as she gently ran her thumb over his lips. Her hand running up and behind his neck to hold him close as she closed the distance between them. Her lips landing lightly on his, hesitant.

When he made no move to pull her in or push her away she slipped her tongue out to run along the seam of his lips. He breathed out hard and his lips parted enough for her to dive inside.

For a brief moment she felt him respond. His hands pulling her closer to him, his head tilting and his lips finally participating.

Then in the next instance he was pulling away and turning from her. Breathing hard he started to shake his head almost as though he couldn't believe he'd wanted to kiss her.

"... I already have someone that's helping me Grace, with all of it. Business...fuckin life, all of it."

Grace had nodded, she couldn't over play her hand here or this conversation would really mark the end.

"So you say Tommy. I only have one question for you then."

He turned back to look at her quirking his brow waiting to hear it.

"Is the one you have helping you, really the one you need. The one you want to be helping you. Is she capable of holding your heart and soul safe, capable of standing beside you through everything that will come?"

Tommy had stared off at nothing for a good long moment before he'd taken another deep breath and answered her.

"I guess I'll find out. I 'ave business I need ta tend ta Grace."

She watched him as he'd nodded to her and headed for her door. She had planted the seed she needed to and knew that it would rattle around his mind hopefully opening the door to herself a little bit more.

Their conversation hadn't gone as well as she'd hoped but it wasn't a complete disaster either. She'd managed to plant the seed of remembering their first time together, of him wanting her in his bed.

She'd gotten him to respond to her kiss which would make him question why he kissed her. A good way to ensure that he thought of those times now in his quiet moments. Remembered how enjoyable their times in both their bedrooms had been and still could be again.

He would also be thinking about if Lizzie was really the one he needed, wanted to have by his side. If she was the one that was cut out for helping him with everything. She had no doubt that she, herself would be playing a fairly prominent role in his thoughts now.

He'd once told her he'd needed someone with class by his side, Lizzie certainly lacked that. Next time she ran into him hopefully she'd be able to find a way to bring that memory to the forefront of his mind again.

#6 Watery Lane

Monday Feb. 16, 1920

Polly POV

It had been quiet without Tommy's presence. He'd left a list of instructions, things that needed to be taken care of while he was away. Everything needed to be timed perfectly and of course it all hinged on whether the Adelisa was capable of coming through with what they needed done.

He seemed to have faith that it would be possible, being him he had an alternate plan laid out just in case the original became unfeasible. She hoped she'd hear whether it was a go or not this evening, but there was no telling on if the Adelisa even knew what was what yet.

John was setting up and getting ready for what they were calling black star day. Making sure the men were getting prepared and that the equipment they needed would be ready. Running through timelines and tasks with everyone, including their new allies the Lee's.

Tommy had told Arthur he wanted him to concentrate on getting the Garrison up and running. He was in charge of making sure all the legal paperwork was sent through for approval so when the building was ready they'd have all the required licenses from the government that they needed. When the time came there was a letter Tommy left in her care for him and it would have specific instructions on his part in black star day.

Tommy had assured her, he would return in time to make sure their plans proceeded as they wanted. His presence that day was after all key for Inspector Taylors benefit. Tommy also wouldn't send the boys out to take care of this without him by their side.

She was to maintain the daily operations of the den and their legal pitch. Along with making sure the paperwork they'd needed drafted was done and delivered to them. The paperwork had to be top notch perfect, it would need to stand up to the closest scrutiny. They'd found and hired the best forger that they could afford. For the price they were paying it had better be fucking perfect.

Vatulele Island - Fiji

Morning

Aoife POV

Aoife was inside her thatched roof hut tucked away in the dense tropical foliage of the island. They'd arrived late the previous evening. Thankfully their cousins ship had arrived earlier that day and they were more than happy to help everyone get situated on land. Eirnin had thought ahead and made sure that two additional huts were made available and ready for the Shelby's.

She'd traded her ocean front hut with Ada. She'd after all been to Fiji more than once herself and thought Ada would probably appreciate the location and view more than she would at this point. She had actually found the privacy of her current hut rather nice, hidden from view and a bit away from everyone else. Not that she wanted to be away from her family, just she knew they could get rowdy and having a slice of quiet would probably be a nice respite.

The beach front hut was also slightly larger which would make accommodations for Ada and John's girls a bit more comfortable. Michael, Finn and the boys were in their own larger three room hut, just down the beach from the others.

Her cousin Cam, who sailed on The Frigg had helped her cart her things to her hut late in the night. They were close, had always had an affinity to one another. They'd been lucky, their parents were close and they had spent most of their holidays together. He was a year younger than she but as all the boys in her family did, he towered over her at six foot four. He'd gone to school to become a doctor and had been a surgeon during the war.

She had always found it a comfort to know she could share everything with him. Their trek to her hut had been filled with light hearted questions and updates about the goings on in their lives. When they'd finally found her hut and were placing her things inside he'd stared at her and told her it was enough, she needed to tell him what was bothering her.

"I don't know what you mean Cam, nothings bothering me."

"Nothin's bothering you? Then what is going on with you? You're off kilter, I can sense it and I can see it Aoife. Tell me what's been happening with you lately that's different than normal."

She heard herself laugh and realized she had crossed her arms, closing herself off from him. She consciously dropped them to her sides and scoffed at herself. She moved out to the deck and flopped herself down on the daybed there. Cam joined her and they stared up at the stars that would peek out of the foliage above them.

"Is it Jasper? Are you worried about having to see him this week?"

She scoffed lightly this time, really only an exhalation of breath.

"I could care less about Jasper. I hope he's managed to find a way to... find the happiness he was looking for."

"So if it's not Jasper, then what is it?"

"I think I've done it this time... I've gone and fallen in love."

Cam was silent beside her, they just laid there listening to the wind glide softly through the trees. The leaves rustling and the slight creak of a branch every now and then filling the air around them. Finally Cam replied to her comment.

"Is this a bad thing?"

"...No."

"So why do you not seem happy?"

"I am... I am happy about it. He makes me happy, makes me feel things I haven't before. I think that's it."

"The new feelings?"

"Yes. I don't know how to... to deal with them. I feel... I feel like I'm all over the place... adrift in a way. Before, I understood my own feelings, I knew myself, what I wanted from my life. It's like when we're together everything makes sense and I'm good. The longer we're apart the more uncertain I seem to become about myself. I don't understand it."

"... you don't?"

"I just said I didn't Cam, keep up."

"Sorry?... Aoife it sounds pretty simple to me."

"Well thank God for that...explain it to me."

Cam laughed softly, "I'm afraid you'll have to bear with me for a moment. Explain to me what it is about the two of you that you're concerned about."

Aoife turned on her side and placed her head in her hand as Cam did the same to face her.

"He's a Grounder Cam. His whole life is on the ground, family, business, his future. He has so much. I won't ask him to leave it and I know he won't ask me to leave mine. Fifty six days out of three hundred and sixty five. That's how many days I'd be in English airspace... not even all of those fifty six days would be near him, with him...just in the same country. One of us will need to compromise and I know it'll be me."

"Do you not want to compromise?"

"It's not that, I know that compromise comes with any relationship."

"What is it then?"

"I've only ever really known the sky Cam. I hated boarding school, I don't know if it was because it was on the ground or because we were away from everyone we loved or if it was just because it was fucking school. What if I compromise, I leave the Adelisa, my home, my family, my job, my way of life... what if I do all that... what if it's too much? What if I can't handle letting all of that go."

"You're right, it's a lot to leave behind. Remember though the Adelisa will always be yours, they'll always be your family. The question that you need to answer is not whether you can handle letting go of the life you've lived thus far. The question, is whether this man that you are in love with, is worth letting all of that go for... Do you think he is?"

"...I do."

Aoife could feel her eyes pooling and normally she'd get mad at herself for showing a damn weakness, but she knew she was safe with Cam. She felt his arms pull her into his chest as they fell gently down to the beds surface. His hand ran soothing circles on her back as she let the tears fall.

His voice as soothing as he could make it sounding in her ears.

"Life changes constantly, it takes us to unexpected places, locations we never thought to see. We must remember that the next adventure in our lives, can be just as beautiful as the last."

Aoife couldn't help the laughter that erupted from her, "You've obviously never been to Small Heath."

"Judging by your reaction I'm guessing it leaves something to be desired... I wouldn't worry though, you've always been good at finding beauty in the unlikeliest of places. Now the reason why everything is good when you're together is because when you're together you're whole once more. You've given a piece of yourself to him Aoife, when you're apart, you're missing that piece and you're adrift till you return to each other."

"... Oh, FUCK... fifty six days out of three sixty five."

"Yeah? You've already decided to take the plunge when it comes time Aoife. What else is holding you back? Tell Dr. Deveroux and I will cure what ails you, cousin."

"Grace. You remember Grace?"

"How could I forget slim blondie."

"They were together."

"She got back with Carrick?"

"No... She and Tommy were together."

"Tommy? The man you're in love with?"

"Yes."

There was a beat of silence before Cam's laughter filled the night air, "This Tommy must be something bloody special if you even considered him after you'd found out he even knew the woman."

"In the beginning I was determined to stay away from him."

"Yeah? So what changed?"

"They were a long time ago. Before the war. He told me they had an 'affection' for one another. What does that even mean Cam, an 'affection', I'll tell you... he loved her. She betrayed him in some way. Sounded like she'd stolen from their business and rabbited. It would appear to have ended badly. He'd had no contact with her since then... till recently."

"She contacted him recently? After all that time."

"Oh, that's how I found out he knew her. He was looking to hire a shipper. His brother came storming in shouting about a letter and wanting to know why she was writing him after all that time. I recognized her handwriting and when they said the name Grace I knew it was her. I tried to back out of the deal we were making and he told me that Grace was in his past and had nothing to do with his present. I took it back to everyone and we voted to continue on with business."

"What did the letter say?"

"I don't know Cam. I didn't read his fucking mail, I don't even know if he did."

"Okay. So your current issue stems from the fact that this Tommy had a serious relationship with Grace six years ago?"

"No...Cam, ugh... okay. I got past the fact that Tommy has a past that involves Grace. Everyone has a past and if he hadn't...had a relationship with her... then he wouldn't be the man he is today, the one I happen to love. I accepted that everything he's done, everything he's gone through, everyone who's been in his life has played some part in making him who he is... My problem is that the last time we spoke he told me she's back in Birmingham."

"Why?"

"She told him it's because she wants him back. The bloody little chit even kissed him. He told me not to worry, that she's not what he wants anymore, and I believe him."

"Ah. I see. You trust him, his word. But that doesn't change who you are. You're upset because she's there with him, while you're here. You'd much prefer to be there so you could kick her skinny little arse for having the gall to kiss your man."

"Right, thank you! I mean I know she isn't aware of me but she thinks he's fucking seriously seeing Lizzie and she went after him anyway."

"Wait, hold up. She doesn't know that you and Tommy are involved now? And who the bloody hell is Lizzie? Why does Grace think her and Tommy are together?"

"Grace assumed he was seeing Lizzie, his secretary slash ex-whore because of some expression she saw when she showed up looking for him. He decided to let her believe what she wanted to. His family is aware of me and once we finish this business of dealing with his cargo so will everyone else."

She watched as Cam took a deep breath before he uttered his next question under his breath almost like he was afraid of her answer.

"His secretary slash ex-whore... you need to explain that to me."

"I know, it's complicated. The more I speak of things out loud I realize how bad it all sounds."

Aoife's sigh was tired and grumpy but she answered Cam's question knowing it wasn't going to make anything they'd discussed sound any better.

"Tommy began visiting Lizzie for her services after he returned from war up until this past September. Lizzie has taken courses to better herself. Tommy offered her a job as his secretary, knowing how difficult it would be to overcome her previous profession and that she could be trusted to hold her silence when it came to the illegal portion of his business. He has assured her that nothing personal will be happening between them."

"Why would he need to do that Aoife?"

"She may have feelings for him, I don't know for sure, I never met the woman."

"For fucks sake, Aoife! These are the actions of a man that you trust?"

"Cam... He's never lied to me. He's always been upfront about everything. He could have hidden the fact that Lizzie used to be a whore, one that he frequented. Hell, he didn't even have to tell me Grace had returned. Yes... I know how it sounds, I know how it looks and I know that I may have made the biggest mistake of my life by allowing myself to fall for him... I need to believe that he's different. That he's being honest with me. I need to trust him Cam. I have to... otherwise what we have together will never work."

"... Is he in love with you?"

"I believe so."

"He hasn't told you?"

"It's not like that Cam. I haven't told him how I feel either. We both know that we care about each other, that there are feelings involved. It's not like we've known each other that long but we both decided we wanted to give us a chance."

"Well fuck...okay. So you'll enjoy the rest of your time on the Adelisa. When you return to Tommy you will feel whole again. If Grace is still around you'll kick her arse all the way out of town. Doctors orders."

She'd stayed up long after he'd left, contemplating what he'd said. Once she realized that she believed Tommy was worth leaving what she knew behind, her emotions seemed to settle into something she could begin to understand. And she had given Tommy a piece of herself, her heart. It was logical that she would feel off with it missing. At least now she understood and she didn't feel quite so... not herself.

Once she'd managed to fall asleep, she apparently slept for awhile because she'd woken well past breakfast. Judging by the placement of the sun that she could just make out through the canopy of leaves above her it was getting on towards time for the afternoon meal.

She felt refreshed and content with her decision about Tommy. She knew what she wanted and she knew what she was going to do with it. She had a plan and her life was back in the orderly fashion that she preferred for it to be in. And if Grace was still in Small Heath by the time she returned she would indeed be happy to show her the fastest way out of England.