"You're so stupid sometimes it's unbelievable!" you're not stupid at all, you're brilliant.
"Well you aren't always that smart either sunshine!" you are my sunshine and without you I'd be lost.
It's one insult after another, each new one hitting harder than the last.
Their mouths are letting out the hurting words and their minds are trying to make them say what they're really thinking.
They don't mean it.
It's a slap to the face.
"You're never here!"
"I'm trying to make a living and give you a decent life as I promised I would!"
They may as well have been throwing newly sharpened knives at each other.
"You aren't even here so you can't!"
"Wow."
The door slamming was the last sound to echo through the little apartment.
The second Addison realised that Zed had really stormed out on her, she slumped against the wall, her shoulders dropping and tears welling. She hadn't meant for it to go as far as it had when she had mentioned to her husband that she didn't get to see him as much anymore. His 9-5 work timetable had escalated and more than less days he was 7-8. He had accepted a lot of overtime recently and it was killing her that he wasn't around. She missed him. She knew he was only doing it to support them, and more importantly her, as she was on her maternity leave. The only days she got to see him was Friday, Saturday and Sunday. During those three days Zed would be so exhausted that he would always end up falling asleep on the couch. And then it was when he would get home in the evenings. She was always asleep when he left in the mornings and she'd wake up alone. When he would return in the evenings, he had have dinner with her, and then head to bed. He was exhausted beyond belief and she could tell.
He had lately been sporting a set of dark bags under his eyes and even though Zed was quite tall, you couldn't tell as he would be slumped most of the days. His body screaming for a break.
If only she could make him see that.
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Anger was running through him as he marched down the street, not really caring where he went, but his feet was guiding him down a familiar path. When he reached the little garden he went to the tree and slid down against it. Letting his head fall back against the tree trunk, he closed his eyes. He wasn't angry at Addison, he wasn't even sure he was cable of ever getting angry with her. He was angry at himself.
He wanted more than anything to scream right there and then. He had so much he needed to let out, so much he had let build up inside him but had stayed quiet to not stress Addison. His wife. The woman who was carrying his child. She already had enough to deal with.
He didn't blame Addison at all, she had only said that she missed him and that he had spent more time at work than at home. It wasn't a lie. It was a wonder he still remembered the colour of the walls in their apartment.
He had started to hate his work, he hated leaving in the morning and he hated every hour spent at the damn place. He used to love his work but now it felt like a prison. He hated coming home to her and being too tired to function. He wanted to be more at home than anywhere else, he wanted to be there for her and their unborn child. She needed him and he had let her down. He was convinced though that what he was doing was right, blind to the obvious truth right in front of him. He had, had money on his mind and the need to make as much of it as possible than being with his wife.
If he didn't stop it anytime soon he would miss out on everything. He would miss out on birth because he would have a meeting, or miss out on their child's first steps because he had to go in early. He might even lose Addison. He couldn't let that happen. He hadn't meant to get this far out. He hadn't meant to lose his way.
He knew he was an idiot. He had really gotten carried away after the one evening, where they had announced together at a shared family dinner that they were expecting their first child. Of course there was some worries about the whole pregnancy since Addison was the first to ever carry a zombie/human hybrid inside her. But they were just as excited as well and devoted their endless support to the couple. It was after dinner when Dale had pulled Zed aside, stepping up to show his protective-father mode that had kicked it all of.
"I know you are already taking well care of my little girl Zed but this is a whole new level to that. She will need you more than ever now and you need to take on more to support her. I know from when Missy was pregnant she felt so helpless and I did majority around the house. How is your money situation? maybe you should consider taking on some over time up until Addison reaches around 6 months and then take leave to be there for her. I had 6 months leave with Missy but I would suggest you might do a year? Your case is slightly different than ours was..." Dale trailed of. It's very different than yours.
"Thank you for your advice Dale, that means a lot to get from someone more experience during this time. I will take care of your daughter I promise."
He had broken that promise whilst trying to keep it.
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He has no idea how long he's sat there, he had left his cell at home on the kitchen counter and he had taken his watch of after his shower. His only idea of how long has gone is the lowering sun down had disappeared. It's only the little lanterns illuminating the garden that he turned on upon entrance that's leaving a dim light.
He's thinking about getting up and making his way home. If Addison will even let him return home that is. He was about to open his eyes and stand up when music reaches his ears, a sweet voice singing out the words to him.
When tomorrow comes, I'll be on my own.
Feeling frightened of, the things I don't know.
When tomorrow comes
Tomorrow comes
Tomorrow comes
He knows that song, it's one of Addison's favourites. He would sing it to her when she was scared, when she was distressed. When she's broken down. When she's lost.
He's the lost one now.
And though the road is long
I look up to the sky and in the dark I found,
I lost hope that I won't fly.
And I sing along, I singalong.
And I singalong.
The lanterns illuminate her shape as she comes into view. Her white hair shining in the light, her soft smile visible to his eyes. She's singing to him. Just like he would sing to her on her darkest days. She's still wearing one of his hoodies that's too big on her but she says she prefers them over maternity clothes. She says it fits perfectly on her bump and that it smells like him. It calms them both down she had said.
I got all I need when I got you and I
I look around me, and I see a sweet life.
I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight,
you're getting me, getting me through the night.
Kick start my heart when you shine it in my eyes.
Can't lie, it's a sweet life.
I'm stuck in the dark, but you're my flashlight,
you're getting me, getting me through the night.
'Cause you're my flashlight,
you're my flashlight,
you're my flashlight.
She's in front of him now, her eyes that he expected to be filled with sorrow, held nothing but love in them as she looked down at him. She's so much stronger than he is. She reaches her hands out for him, he pushes himself up, knowing that Addison shouldn't carry any more weight than what she is, before he accepts them. Her soft smile is still there, she let's go of his hands to guide them to her waist before placing her own around his neck. She starts the movement, she guides them along to the music as she continues to sing.
I see the shadows long beneath the mountain top,
I'm not afraid when the rain won't stop.
'Cause you light the way,
You light the way, you light the way.
He spins her around, and then pulls her back against his chest. She smiles widely when he does that and he can't help but smile himself. He starts to sing with her, the sorrow in his eyes gone and replaced by the same love that she has in hers. She's brought him back.
Back home.
She's shown him the way home again.
I got all I need when I got you and I,
I look around me and I see a sweet life.
You're getting me, getting me through the night.
Kick start my heart when you shine it in my eyes.
Can't lie, it's a sweet life.
I'm stuck in the dark but you're my flashlight.
You're getting me, getting me through the night.
Light, light, light, you're my flashlight.
Light, light, light, you're my flashlight.
They stay like that, rocking back and forth to the music, singing to each other. Zed will every now and then pull back to spin Addison around. Addison will laugh as he does so and he will smile wider each time.
They guide each other and they need each other. When one is lost the other will find them and guide them home again, and the other will return the favour. They always will.
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The next day Zed told his work that he'd go down to three days a week, 9-3 and that two weeks later he would take leave. His work is happy about him and everything he had done and is aware of everything and simply nod their head in agreement. They too have noticed one of their most impressive employees use up all of his energy trying to keep everything together and they do not want to be the fault of his break down.
Before he leaves they tell him that they look forward to meet their child and makes him promise to bring him/her in.
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