"It's not that it's-" Jane tried to think of the right words, her mouth opened in vain as she struggled to put her thoughts in order.

"That he's more like a brother to you" Pepper finished at the other end of the phone.

"Exactly!" the redhead was grateful she had understood, but sighed despite it all. "Linus is a good man. He's intelligent, and kind, and funny-but I can't see him as anything more than just my friend." She brought up the wooden spoon to her mouth, taking a small taste of the sauce she'd concocted with the help of a YouTube tutorial. It was, without a doubt, disgusting. No recipe in the world would ever make her a good cook! She turned off the stove with more force than necessary, practically hearing her mother's chastising voice in her ears. "Does that make me a horrible person?"

"Nooo Petal" Pepper said in that long drawn out way she did when she was lying to her.

"Pepper."

"I mean-listen love-you are not a bad person for turning down any man. You know I love your sense of independence Jane-"

"-But?" Jane knew a 'but' was coming whenever Pepper mentioned her 'sense of independence'.

"But, I think you shouldn't turn down every man in the world just because you find some kind of fault with him."

"Are you calling me picky?" the redhead tried to sound insulted as she threw the pot full of sludge into the sink. It would be another night of Chinese take out.

"Nooo, all I'm saying is that you have very high standards and that maybe you should consider...I don't know...lowering them for once?"

"I just don't see the point in it all" Jane balanced the phone from one ear to the next as she opened the fridge. It was almost empty. Her free hand grabbed for the milk, but when she shook it she didn't like the sound it made. Eck. Something else to toss in the trash. "I'm in my final year now and classes are starting to really buckle down. I have test next week on Medieval government and two papers on the Renaissance. I don't have time to date!"

"That's what you said when you were in your first year and then in your second year" Pepper criticized in between bites of something. Jane wondered what she was eating, though she knew it was probably much better than whatever she had attempted to cook tonight. She'd kill to have some of Pepper's cooking right now. "When will you have time to date Jane? When you're in a senior home?! Having a degree in Ancient History doesn't mean your romantic life has to be left in the past."

"Clever" Jane raised a brow, even though her friend couldn't see it.

"Thank you" Pepper chimed "Maybe one day I'll take a history course and see you in the textbooks."

"Don't push it" Turnkey warned, but smiled anyways.

"But honestly Petal! When's the last time you went out on a date?"

"Uhmmm...I want to say…prom?" Jane acted as if she couldn't remember, but the memory was crystal clear in her mind. John Johnson had been as dull as his name sounded. He'd worn a tan tuxedo (of all atrocities) to the dance and stood next to the snack table for most of the night. Jane had never known the human body was capable of storing that much punch in one night.

"Mhm" Pepper said as if she'd expected as much "And the last time you shagged someone?"

"Pepper!" She could feel her face grow hot, and Jane looked around her apartment as if fearing someone had overheard her friend's blunt question, but she lived alone so her worry was for naught. The tall woman stayed silent for a moment before finally groaning, her palm coming up to rub at her cheek. "Prom."

"Well that is about to change Jane Turnkey! I can't sit idly by and watch my Petal collect dust like some old, unused tissue! You're going on a date and that will be the end of it. No more 'if's or 'but's from you until after you've given someone a chance."

"I get this dreaded feeling that you've already had something planned in advance." The pit of her stomach turned cold from the thought of it. That's exactly something she'd do.

"Yes, if you must know I've planned a date with Drake tomorrow, and he has a rather handsome friend he can bring along."

"Who is it?"

"A man with a respectable job-"

"-like who?"

"-and who is also very into his studies-"

"Pepper, you better not say who I think you're going to-"

"-and his name may or may not be Gunther Breech."

"NO. No. DEFINITELY NOT" Jane put her mouth directly into the mic of her phone "I refuse to go anywhere near that rat! Let me invite Linus instead, at least he doesn't give me the urge to choke him where he stands."

"Well that is tough turnips Jane" Pepper tried her best to sound snooty. It reminded her of her mother. "Because I've already invited him, and Drake is looking forward to seeing you tomorrow. So...there!"

"Compelling argument" Jane replied sarcastically.

"You might as well start to get used to him anyways" the brunette warned "One day he might be teaching at the same university as you."

"You know very well that if he were to get any type of position in any university it would be because-" Jane could hear her friend start to quote her verbatim on the other side of the phone.

"-his father bribed the staff to put him there. He's not competent enough to pass on his own."

"his father bribed the staff to put him there. He's not competent enough to pass on his own."

She heard Pepper sigh as if she was a million miles away. "I know Petal, but I'm not asking you to marry Gunther-just humor him for one night. He does seem to like you."

And that was the real problem, because Gunther made it abundantly clear to her that his hatred had turned into something else. He had been particularly cheeky the past few weeks, though Jane was sure it was simply another tactic to get under her skin. Apparently her dry spell was more public than she might have figured, and Gunther was enjoying every bit of it.

"If it helps any little bit, he is looking a bit more attractive than usual-"

"-Pepper-"

"-I'm just saying! The other day Drake and I had run into him at that little coffee shop by Fifth Avenue-what was the name? Kipper...something...Kafe maybe...well in any case, he had just come from the gym and-"

"-Pepper-"

"-I'm just saying! He was practically glistening in that grey tank top-"

"-OK, OK I get it-" Jane could feel her face grow warm. Despite her will power, the image had popped into her mind more clearly than she would've liked. Gunther was good looking, there was no denying that...and yes maybe recently she had noticed he looked more...in shape than usual.

"Dumb or not, the boy can turn heads."

"Gunther isn't dumb" Jane sighed, already tired of talking and thinking about Gunther for one day "he's just lazy. He's a rat remember?"

"But a hot rat."

"I'm not going validate that statement with a response."

"That's fine" Jane could hear the smile on Pepper's lips "either way you do owe Drake a visit. If I remember correctly, someone promised to see his new spring potatoes last week but didn't show up?"

Jane stayed quiet. Suddenly she didn't feel so hungry.

"I'll be making your favorite-Eton mess with extra strawberries" Pepper sang tantalizingly.

Disobediently, her stomach growled. Maybe she was a little bit hungry. "Fine, fine" Jane messaged her aching temple "but don't expect me to play nice. I'm going there to eat and look at potatoes."

"Perfect!" Pepper practically squealed "See you tomorrow Petal!"

Jane was sure her groan could be heard in the apartment room above, but she didn't care. When she finished, she called Chinese restaurant from across the street and tried not to think anymore about Gunther and his grey tank top.

"Come in! Come in!" Pepper rushed Jane inside without letting her get a word out. She looked almost as stressed as she sounded. Her over-sized and stained shirt hung off of one shoulder, the words 'Be Happy!' printed in a bright purple across the top of it. The bright yellow smiley face on it beamed eagerly at Jane. She frowned.

"For a second I thought there was a war going on in here" the taller female teased "with all the disturbing noises I heard coming from the other side of the door."

"Don't mind the racket coming from the kitchen" Pepper put her hands on her hips "I'm wrangling with a couple of my pans right now. I've lost one of the bloody ones I actually need!"

"Can't you just use another one?" Jane asked casually, closing the door behind her. The look of disbelief from Pepper was a clear enough answer. "OK, I get you-foolish question. My sincerest apologies chef."

"You are forgiven" the short girl smiled amusedly before it turned back into a frown. "This whole ordeal has me falling a bit behind schedule" she blew away a wild strand of hair from her eyes "But it's okay! Drake told me he and Gunther were running behind too, so hopefully everything will be done by then."

"Do you need some help? I could help you cook or-"

"-Oh nonono! I mean-no need Petal, please just enjoy yourself."

"Nice save" Jane's eyebrows furrowed with both humor and insult. She couldn't blame her, the last time she helped Pepper cook Jane had managed to burned down half the kitchen and overflow the other half with water. "I brought this, if this..helps at all I guess?" she motioned to the bottle of wine wrapped in a paper bag "I know I'll be drinking some tonight for sure." She mumbled the last part.

"I might just be having two cups right now if you don't mind" Pepper winked, as she gratefully took the bottle from her hands. When she opened the door leading to the kitchen, Jane could see the mess of pots and pans and spoons that littered the counters. Yeah, she definitely wasn't touching that. Maybe she'd help clean, but her services would only make matters worse.

"Can I put my jacket in your room?" she called out to Pepper, who popped her head out with a cup of wine in hand.

"Of course! Oh and I uhm, got you a little something." Her smile was practically devilish as she sipped her drink. Jane didn't like it one bit. She squinted her eyes at the brunette, but the girl spoke no more before she turned and headed back to the kitchen.

"That Eton mess better be the best damn dessert I've ever had" Jane mumbled as she walked into Pepper's room. Completely contrast to the kitchen area, it was impeccable, and she almost felt bad throwing her jacket onto the crisp bed sheets. Next to her jacket lay the gift Pepper had gotten her. The gift box alone was lovely enough to make her hold her breath for a second. It was creme colored and elegantly wrapped by a black silk bow. The redhead touched the bow gingerly, turning one of the ribbons over to read the label 'GWENDOLINE DESIGNS' printed on the end. The company sounded familiar, but not enough to where Jane could place the product. It all looked a bit pricey, enough to embarrass her a little. Pepper really did spoil her too much sometimes.

From the other side of the door she could hear the loud clanking of pots and pans, strung with a couple of color curses from her friend.

Opening the box, Jane found another bow, this one a light pink, wrapped around black tissue paper. "Jeez" she mumbled, finding it a bit of a shame to take apart the pretty wrapping. Her fingers skirted over a a small sticker that kept the tissue paper from opening at the bottom. On it was a small picture of a cup with a heart etched on its surface. She peeled the sticker off, and to her surprise she noticed a word printed on the back side. 'COFFEE' it read in simple, black font. Confused, Jane quickly undid the last bow and separated the paper. Inside was...well...she didn't really know. It was a vibrant brown color with a lot of lace and straps that she couldn't quite figure out. Was it some sort of strange dress? A jumpsuit maybe?

From the kitchen she heard Pepper turn on some music. A bouncy little tune she usually played when she was trying to calm herself down from an anger spell.

She dug around until she found two straps that she believed were for the shoulders and pulled the piece of fabric out. Soon enough it became crystal clear what she was looking at.

Lingerie.

Pepper had bought her brown lingerie with all the works. The network of straps connected one of the main pieces together, and to her pleasant surprise Jane found small bows adorning the lace here and there. A little embellishment of dark brown crystals were sewn into the dainty, tiny three piece ensemble, and she watched as they sparkled under Pepper's bedroom light. From the corner of her eye, Jane caught a small white card with her friend's cursive written neatly on it.

'For you Petal~! Call this a good luck charm for things to come. ;) May it spark a whole latte love!

Xoxo,

The most caring friend you have.

PS No need to thank me.'

Jane stared dumbfounded at the note. Oh, she was going to start 'a whole latte' something alright!

"No, no Jane. That's exactly what she wants." Pepper knew how to tease her just as well as Gunther sometimes, especially when she knew she could get her all worked up and flustered. If she retaliated now with a slew of words, then Pepper had gotten the upper hand between them. She needed to be smart-she needed to beat her at her own game. Jane pressed her ear the door. The music still played, but aside from that it was relatively quiet. "I'm going to give her exactly what she wants. Two can play cheeky Pepper, just watch." If there was something she didn't like, it was being made a sport of, and admittedly that was sometimes a rather easy thing for someone to do. It did take Jane a while to catch up to pranks and jokes. She wasn't half as witty as Linus, or as spunky as Pepper, but eventually she could play with the best of them. "Okay" she said to the lingerie as she held it back up "time to put you on."

The task proved to be as daunting as it felt. It had taken her about ten minutes to figure out what body part went where and what bit went over what, and in the end she learned that not very much went over any bit. However, after much of the struggle was over, Jane took a look at herself in the mirror. It felt like ripping off a very painful band-aid; she wasn't really used to wearing anything like this. The thought of going out to buy lingerie herself was mortifying enough, but this was a new level of humiliation. Still, what she saw in her reflection didn't look...all that bad? The pieces fit her very well, and the color did compliment her skin tone surprisingly well. The rich brown was strikingly similar to coffee beans and she appreciated the attention to detail put into the small beads. If she had become a housewife like her mother wanted her to instead of a history professor, perhaps she would have learned to make things like this. Her bum didn't look half bad either.

"Petal?"

Pepper's voice took Jane out of her thoughts, and the ginger smiled impishly at the thought of surprising her. 'She's going to have a stroke when she sees me in this!' Jane almost laughed, the thought of her friend's shocked face too sweet an image to take in.

"Coming!" she called out as innocently as she could. Without giving herself a chance to regret her decision, Jane opened the door and stood in the hallway with her hands on her hips. She made a mocking attempt at a sexy pose just as Pepper set down a tray full of rice on the table.

"What do you think Pepper? Is this cute enough for my date to enjoy? Or should I wear something else?"

The brunette's expression was just as good-no-so much better than Jane could've imagined. Pepper's mouth dropped open at a speed that Jane had yet to witness even on rocket ships. Her eyes, which were already pretty large in comparison to others, grew twice their size. She looked almost cartoonish!

"Uhhhh" was all the girl was able to muster, and that was enough to send Jane in a fit of laugh and snorts. Jane laughed until tears pricked at her eyes.

"And I thought you were under dressed Pepper-" a familiar voice cut Jane's laugh short "but it looks like Jane has taken the meaning to a whole new level."

No. Nonono. No. It can't be.

But it was.

Gunther stood at the other end of the hall, arms crossed as he brazenly drank Jane up with his eyes. The smirk on his face was sharp with amusement. "And no Jane, I can't say I have any issues with this get up. It looks simply peachy to me."

Jane felt-felt with every single fiber in her being-the color drain from her body. She stood there, frozen like a deer caught in headlights but silently begging to be hit by a semi.

"Our guests...arrived a bit earlier...than expected" explained Pepper slowly, her eyes still glued to Jane.

"Oh hello Pepper. Hello J-bouncing blueberries!" Rake stammered as he walked in, also catching a glimpse of her. He quickly covered his eyes with his hands, albeit he had grown a few shades redder. "H-hello Jane. I'm sorry. I didn't know we were having a sleepover kind of party?"

"Now that sounds fun" Gunther continued, pointing to Rake but not turning to look at him. "Is that suddenly on the table? Because I call dibs on sharing a bed with Turnkey here."

"G-gunther" Jane finally managed between her gritted teeth "you complete b-b-biscuitweevil."

"No?" Breech acted genuinely surprised before returning to his shit eating grin "then perhaps I could take you out to get a cup of coffee sometime? There's this quaint cafe on Fifth Avenue, have you heard of it?"