Before departing her snowy cabin for Shikkotsu, Sakura opened the scroll that held her next target. It held both a man's name and a specific village - while better than a general mountain range, she still very nearly started hyperventilating at the thought of going after another target. Katsuyu, reading the scroll from a perch on Sakura's shoulder, promised to accompany her and help if necessary; while this made Sakura feel significantly better, it hardly dissolved her dread.

The target had been easy to find. The village, while not quite on the way to Shikkotsu, was only a detour of a few days, and boasted pleasant weather and vibrant markets. Unlike Kano, this man did not keep to himself, and did not live in a cave; he boasted his name everywhere he went, and the villagers, who had been largely left alone by the war, were happy to point her in his direction. He stole and fought and killed and slept in inns or with his drunken face pressed into a bar. He wasn't careful, and when Sakura had disguised herself as a pretty blonde with soft brown eyes and sat next to him in a tavern, he spent too much time looking at her chest and not her hands. He'd been drunk beyond thought when she'd sprinkled the powder into his drink. It didn't need to be tasteless; if it was tasted, then it was already too late. He died alone in his room an hour later, after Sakura had excused herself to go to the restroom and didn't return.

It had been a clean, easy kill, done within two days of her arrival in the village. It made her uneasy to think that all it had taken to turn her into a killer had been a few months in the snow and one butchered assassination, but she felt undeniable relief at how smoothly the mission came and went. Her respite was quickly quelled with the thought of how many more missions were to come, and how unlikely it was that they would all be drunks with a soft spot for pretty, chatty girls.

The next day, she pressed onward with Katsuyu on her shoulder. It had been nearly two weeks since then, walking through grassy fields with no shelter from the blistering sun. Sakura had draped a shirt over her head and the slug's body; somehow, the back of her neck still burned and blistered.

Now, per Katsuyu, they were drawing close to the human entrance of the forest; no more than an hour's journey at a leisurely pace, and the slug began to tell her what to expect in Shikkotsu.

"You will go through a cleansing period in the forest," Katsuyu murmured in Sakura's ear. "It will last many days."

"Like a bath?" Sakura mumbled. A bath would be nice. "Are there hot springs?"

"Not a bath. There are no baths. They are a human invention."

"Oh."

"A spiritual cleansing. On all levels of your being, you must be clean."

"Not the physical level."

"We don't care so much about the physical level, no."

Sakura sighed. She cared deeply about cleanliness at the physical level; she suspected that the longer she went without a bath, the more her humanity seeped out of her body.

"You can see Shikkotsu now, Miss Sakura," Katsuyu murmured. Sakura squinted into the distance; the forest had come into sight, dark and massive and foreboding. A large, decrepit stone arch stood at the very edge, decaying and crumbling. Sakura had a feeling she was going to have to walk through it.

After they had traversed nearly three quarters of the distance to the arch, Katsuyu spoke again. "I will leave you here, and go alert your hokage and his superiors to your plans, as we discussed."

Sakura stopped walking and bowed her head in thanks, her eyes staring into the greenery.

"As soon as you step foot in Shikkotsu, it will try to spit you out. You must be strong. Especially now, in the beginning, it will be difficult for you. Keep moving toward the center; that is the home of my family and we will greet you at the temple there."

"I will," Sakura promised, and gently lifted the slug off of her shoulder and placed it on the ground. "Will I be seeing you soon?"

"I would not say particularly soon, no. But that depends on you," The slug said cryptically.

"Then I will see you not particularly soon," Sakura smiled, and bowed to the slug. "Safe travels."

"You as well."

And with a poof, the slug disappeared into thin air.

Alone again for the first time in weeks, Sakura stood at the edge of the forest for a few moments; there was something different about the trees here than the trees from home. Like they were sentient. She shook her head; trees were trees, no matter where they were. She stepped into the woods, holding her breath.

Nothing happened. She took a step.

Nothing happened again.

She took another step.

"What are you waiting for?" a small voice called out, making Sakura jump out of her skin.

"Who's there?" she called back, palming a kunai at her waist. There was no discernible source for the voice. Unless… the trees? She squinted at the trunks surrounding her. She knew something was different about them.

"Oh, relax. There'll be no need for that," the voice replied. "Stop glaring at the trees. It's me, your friendly forest slug guide. Over here. No, over here. That's it. A few steps closer."

As Sakura walked towards the voice, a small form began to distinguish itself from the bark of an old birch. Perhaps half the length and twice the girth of her forearm, Sakura could tell it was an older slug despite its small size; the brown spots that mottled its ivory skin gave it away.

"Oh!" Sakura exclaimed, and bowed before the slug as she had been taught by Tsunade. "I'm sorry. I didn't see you there."

"Is that so," the slug said dryly. "You may pick me up. Careful, careful. My back isn't what it used to be."

Sakura gently pulled the slug from the bark and allowed it to slither around her wrist creating a perch in her palm.

"I'm sure Katsuyu told you that you will train while you journey to the home of the slugs in the center of the forest. Well, today, you train with me while I guide you to the next post. There, your next guide will meet you. And so on, until you reach the temple of the sages."

"Uh, no, Katsuyu must have forgotten to mention that. I thought I would have to find the center of the forest myself?" Sakura inquired, entirely unsure of whether or not to feel relieved.

"No, no. You would most certainly die," the slug said conversationally, almost jovially. Sakura decided relief was not an appropriate emotion. "Guaranteed! So for now, I will be helping you. Now, we will begin without delay, before you go any further."

"Okay," Sakura said cautiously, still holding the slug an arm's length away from her. This slug seemed too casual about her demise for her liking. "Will this be the same training as on the top of Mount Myoboku?"

"You know of the training undertaken by the Toad Sage candidates?" the slug asked, and if it had eyebrows, one might be raised at her.

"My friend is a toad sage. He told me about it."

"You are friends with the host of the nine tails?"

"I forced it out of him. We were very close."

"Were?" the slug inquired, but did not pause for her answer. "Training here is both very different and very similar to the rituals performed atop Myoboku. We have no toad oil, nor will you be doing silly things like balancing atop pillars. We have some strict requirements - all sages must come to us as healers, for instance - and we are less strict in others; we do not need you to have boundless chakra levels. We can work around that. You are still likely to be hit with a stick, however."

"Oh."

"And things will be different for you than they were for your friend, as well. He had both advantages and disadvantages from having a tailed beast; while he has exponentially more chakra than you, making it easier for him, but more chakra is more difficult to control, making it easier for you. He was learning how to be a sage for two beings, and you must learn for only one."

"It took him nearly no time at all."

"It will take you much longer than it took him," the slug said solemnly. "And even after you leave here, being a sage is a lifelong journey. Now, are you ready to begin your training? We must not delay."

"Yes," Sakura straightened her back. "What do I need do?"

"For today, we will begin your training with with sage meditation and chakra processing."

"Meditation," Sakura repeated. She was going to train in relaxation? "That sounds nice."

"Your predecessor thought the same thing," the slug said fondly. "Until he very nearly drowned. And sage meditation is quite different from regular meditation."

"My predecessor?" she repeated. "Drowned?"

"Let us walk. Or rather, let you walk and let me be carried. I will guide you to the rocks of rumination, and then we will begin."

Sakura allowed the old slug to slither to her shoulder, where it settled contentedly on the strap of her pack, and began directing orders at her. Walk forward, turn left, turn right, over this fallen tree and under these branches.

As she walked, Sakura took in the forest around her. The ground was damp earth and moss, littered with leaves and mottled with sunlight. The air was humid but cool, and although there were recent signs of life adorning the dirt and the branches, the forest was completely silent.

"There aren't any birds in Shikkotsu?"

"Oh, there most certainly are! All sorts of birds."

"I can't hear any."

"Yes, they are all silent. Your chakra is loud and unrefined and it is causing a great disturbance in the forest, scaring the birds away from us. Your chakra is considered quite rude."

Sakura accepted this silently; even though her chakra control was a point of pride, the slug must know better than her. She conducted the rest of the hike in silence.

When they reached a river, no wider than 20 meters across, the slug directed her to walk north along the bank for a short distance, promising her rest at the end. As she drew closer, her ears began to make out the sound of water thrashing against rocks. Your predecessor thought the same thing, until he nearly drowned. She shook the words out of her head. She was a strong swimmer.

"Those are the rocks of rumination," the slug said, peering directly ahead at the rocks at the base of the waterfall. "They are the place of the foundation of your training, and possibly the most sinister, unstable place in all of Shikkotsu. But for now, we will stop here, and we will hammer out some of the basics. Find a shady place and stop walking."

Sakura did as she was told and stopped under a tree along the river bank. They must have been walking for several hours; her feet ached.

"Have you ever meditated before, child?"

"Not really," Sakura answered honestly. She didn't consider herself to be the meditation type; her mind was always running, and she didn't see a problem with that.

"Why not? Your master meditates. She must have tried to teach you."

"I haven't had much time for any sitting and thinking."

"Sitting and thinking?" the slug laughed. "That is what you think meditating is? Then your master has failed you. Find a place you like, sit, and then I will tell you what meditation is."

Deciding not to respond to the slight against Tsunade, Sakura looked around; she settled on a patch of grass that was dappled with both sunlight and shade, only a few feet from the edge of the river. She settled there, plunking her pack down and then leaning against it. "Is this alright?"

"A good choice," the slug said approvingly. "I will tell you what meditation is. It is thoughtless awareness. It is the deep inner peace that can only be a product of the mind being calm and completely silent, but simultaneously alert. And when you do it for the purpose of channeling sage energy, it is called sage meditation. It is the key to unlocking your sage state."

"That all sounds pretty nice," Sakura admitted. "So how do I do it?"

"Before I tell you how, I will tell you why you must do it. You are going to be confronted with a chakra that will be overpowering to your own. Overpowering to your very existence. It will want to take over you, want to confiscate your mind and body and disintegrate you. So you must become so strong in mind that you can quell every wayward thought and control this new chakra, so that it wants the same things that you want."

"I don't love the pitch," Sakura said dryly, pushing her trepidation down. Remember why you're here. Remember who you're here for, and images of her old friends swirled across her mind. "I don't want to, uh, disintegrate."

"So let's have a start, then!" the slug agreed. "Now, this is going to be a highly uncomfortable process. In order to achieve a true meditative state, you must be calm in the face of great fear, even more so than required for medical jutsu. You must be at peace with yourself. You, child, have arrived at no such peace."

Sakura could not argue with that.

"There is a deep undercurrent of despair, anger, and grief punctuating your being. The whole forest has known this since you stepped foot in our home. How can you expect to achieve calm and silence of the mind with those kinds of thoughts running through your head?"

She shook her head, unable to answer, slightly unsettled that the forest seemed to know much more about her than she did about it.

"You will confront those things at the rocks. But for now, we will cover the very basics of the process of sage meditation. Sit up straight, place your hands in your lap, and close your eyes."

She did as she was told.

"Good. I assume that Tsunade has taught you how to sense the position and condition of your own tenketsu?"

"Yes."

"That is good. I was beginning to wonder about that girl. So now, send a small pulse circulating through all of your tenketsu, and follow it from start to finish. Do not let it dissipate."

"All three hundred and sixty one?" Sakura asked, astonished.

"How are you going to conduct an unbroken stream through less than that?" the slug groused, impatient. "Just try it."

So she did. With her hands in her lap and her eyes closed, as she had been instructed, she let every one of her tenketsu flare up, like three hundred and sixty one stars creating a constellation of her body. As chakra was easiest to concentrate in the hands, she formed a small bolus of energy and began to guide it linearly through her tenketsu up her arm. She made it nearly to her shoulder before she could no longer hold the chakra together, and it fizzled away.

"That was not horrible!" the slug exclaimed when she opened her eyes. "You really do have excellent chakra control, for a human. Of course, your predecessor made it all the way through his head and across both arms on his first try, but he was much more talented than you, so don't be discouraged."

"Why would I be?" Sakura grumbled sarcastically, finding herself out of breath from the short exercise. "Who was my predecessor, again?"

"All in good time. Again!" the slug demanded.

So she closed her eyes again, and began to pull her chakra from the same speck on her fingertip. When she finally lost control, it was somewhere in her neck.

"That was eighteen more than last time," the slug commended her. "But the arms contain the most accessible tenketsu. You will find more difficulty when you encounter the midline torso."

"Any tips?" she gagged, her heart beating out of her chest. "I'm going to pop a vessel."

"No tips!" the slug said. "You will figure it out. I am going to go eat some leaves. You will continue to work on this until you are finished."

Sakura groaned, staring at the water in front of her. It seemed impossible. But she closed her eyes and tried again. Several hours passed before the slug came back for her. She was able to report that she had successfully painstakingly navigated the same ball of chakra through her head and arms, but no further. The slug offered her no help and bid her continue before going off in search of more leaves.

She worked through the night, and it wasn't until the sun started peeking above the trees that she finally understood what she needed to do.

For the first time, and with astonishing ease, she navigated through each and every one of her tenketsu. It took her less than a minute. Exhausted, she collapsed onto the soft grass, each of her tenketsu buzzing in unison, leaving her feeling electrified.

"Well done!" the slug cried when it found her some half an hour later, morning now in full swing. "How did you finally do it?"

Slowly, Sakura pulled her spine straight, sitting and gazing into the rushing water that had been her companion through the night. "I realized I needed to make a river."

"A river?"

"Instead of trying to force it through, I let it be carried by a stream. I'm used to diverting chakra streams from my seal, so when I did that... It was easy. Is that the right answer?"

"There is no correct answer, so long as you arrive at the correct outcome. Although that is only true in this instance, so don't take that to heart or anything. But now we may cross the river to the rocks."

Leaving her pack at the shore, Sakura waded through the waist-deep water with the slug on her shoulder. It directed her to a small, dark cove behind the waterfall, with hardly enough space to stand and water up to her mid-calf.

"Here you will make peace with yourself in order to achieve sage meditation," the slug said somberly, quietly. "This is a sacred space, imbued with the chakra of forces more ancient than any of us can know."

"That is, uh, pretty terrifying." Sakura said honestly. "What kind of ancient forces are we talking about? Like, sudden death forces?"

"This is not a trivial undertaking, Sakura. If you are unsure, it is better to turn back now," the slug warned. "Many before you have been driven insane at these very rocks, seeking exactly what you seek. Inner peace does not come peacefully. Not here."

"So there's only two options? Make peace or go crazy?" she hedged, not liking what she was hearing one bit.

"There is a third option. You can leave. But you will not be able to return to the sage path ever again."

"Maybe I should just go," Sakura said. She could become strong enough to complete her mission through other means; she didn't know what they were, but they must be there. Her heart ached too bitterly, too aggressively for it to ever settle; she knew she could contend with it for the rest of her life and it would not budge an inch.

"Child," the slug said, it's voice taking on a heartfelt sympathetic tone. "You do not have to forget your pain, or even stop feeling it, to be at peace. You do not have to forget your love or your grief. It may always be a part of you. But if you are to become a sage, you must accept these parts of yourself, and end the war that is in your soul, or it will consume you."

She rubbed the back of her neck, looking around the damp, dark cave. At once it seemed both innocuous and perverse, shallow but unfathomably deep. Something about it made her want to run and never look back; something else beckoned her inside, bade her curl into a ball and remain forever in the watery tomb.

Sakura closed her eyes. She thought of the things that had given her strength in the past few months. Ino's blond ponytail flitted across her mind, followed by Kakashi's single smiling eye, the glint of her first hitai-ate in the Konoha sun, Naruto's rough hand in Hinata's small one, the swish of Lee's ridiculous hair. The walls of the village she laid down her life for time and time again. The thick, dark eyelashes framing the black eyes of the only man she ever loved, unendingly and without reservation.

When she spoke, her voice was steady and resolute.

"How do I start?"