3: IDENTITY ON HIS OWN TERMS
A/N: My FN muse comes and goes. It popped in during the summer months, slipped away around the end of last year. You'll have to bear with me with this story, but I promise I'll do all in my power to complete it—even if it takes me years! I have the whole thing outlined, and I've already posted some of it, so there's no reason why I should just leave it all hanging. Now if only life would understand that…oh well.
Gill didn't resist getting captured as much as he should have. Here was his chance to satisfy his curiosity about humans-the forbidden kind of curiosity, you know, that excitement to learn about something that nobody knows. There was that unspoken rule, though: ocean-dwellers and humans should never, ever meet-it will end badly. Only one way to find out if that was true.
In Gill's opinion, at least in the beginning, tank life became something akin to paradise quickly enough: there was always a perfect temperature, perfect chemistry, clean environment, and okay diet. The diver, who Gill soon gathered was named either Phillip or Dr. Shermann, was extremely miticulous about keeping the tank water feeling and tasting just right; a strange device kept Gill's new home spotless at all times (Gill would, of course, learn all about the filter later); and Gill was gently weened off of sponges and algae and on to some bland pellets that, while adequately neutricious, did nothing for flavor, and so Gill did not eat as often as this human expected him to. Gill learned quickly not to eat the fake plants or the fake coral that were purchased to decorate the tank. There was plenty of swimming space, despite the fact that the diver enjoyed adding tacky decoration after tacky decoration until the tank was divided in two by the fake plants: pretty shells and gems and bright little structures on one side, darker, sunken-ship-related décor on the other. After Gill discovered how convenient the skull with the eye patch was for a nice dark place to sleep, he didn't really concern himself with the other decorations.
The best part of this new life? here, it was okay to watch humans! And there were many, many humans to watch. Fascinating creatures.
On one side of the tank—the side with the brighter, prettier decorations, there were places for humans to sit and wait; there was a box with glowing pictures that talked and made weird noises that humans liked to stare at; there were a bunch of contraptions and objects in one corner of the room that the little juvenile humans seemed to really like; the adult humans always seemed less than happy about being there, and Gill learned why when he figured out what went on on the other side of the tank, where the sunken ship and pirate decorations were:
humans came to this place to get their mouths looked at, and the diver that took care of Gill's tank also took care of human mouths. Humans didn't like getting there mouths checked very much. Sometimes the diver—who the humans called a "dentist"—put tools into a human's mouth. Sometimes humans wanted there teeth shinier, sometimes they wanted them straighter, sometimes their mouth had made them sick somehow and the dentist made them better.
The activity in just one room could get sort of boring after awhile for Gill, so he moved back and forth between the rooms a lot to keep an eye on as many humans as he could. Gill liked to swim, and the humans liked to look at him…it seemed to make them happier to watch him instead of focusing on the reason they were at this place. Gill made sure never to make eye contact with a human and to seem nonchalant and indifferent to them—he tried his best, but at times he couldn't resist interacting with them—just a little. Rushing up to a juvenile and then darting away to make them laugh; staying by a scared human laying in the reclining chair so they wouldn't be quite as scared; he made it all look as if he wasn't doing it on purpose, but he was. But if nobody knew, then Gill wasn't actually breaking any ocean rules.
Here, surrounded by humans who liked to see him, Gill didn't feel as detached or small anymore. He found himself actually happy to wake up each day when the light made its way through the one open eye of the skull so he could see all the humans. After some time, some humans that came there often remembered Gill and were actually very excited to see him. This was amazing! Noone telling Gill he was weird for being close to humans, no need to hide from them, no need to explain the odd or questionable behavior here or there to anyone…it was so freeing!
It didn't last, though. Before Gill could even think about getting lonely (which would have taken quite awhile, really), there came news of more fish coming to the tank. The dentist casually mentioned it to a patient one day: "You know, I finally found some great deals on the kinds of fish I want in there. I've been looking for awhile, and I finally found 'em! Some of them'll start arriving Tuesday, I think. That little guy's not gonna be lonely in there anymore."
It was a Friday. Tuesday was four whole days away. For the first time, Gill was relieved when the dentist's office closed up that evening. He spent the weekend in his skull, not even coming out to eat. As Tuesday came closer, Gill became more anxious. Why did Philip have to go and get more fish? Gill was perfectly fine with just him in here! But the humans wanted more fish. And the dentist had been saying that research said that Moorish idols liked to have other fish in their tanks—Dr. Shermann thought he was helping Gill by getting more tank inhabitants. But he wasn't. Now there would be other fish in the tank…other fish to watch Gill and judge him, like back in the ocean…the dentist thought that human research could tell him how to take care of Gill, but Gill wasn't like other Moorish idols—Tyranos had emphasized that plenty. Gill couldn't guarantee there not being another Tyranos, but maybe he could change how he confronted the fish.
And so, on Monday, he emerged from his sleeping place with a high spirit and treated his humans like nothing was wrong: Gill had a plan for these new fish. He wasn't going to let anyone push him around anymore: he would be the boss in this tank, he decided. He would get to know his new tank mates and build a nice, safe identity that wouldn't get him hurt again.; he would be aloof and untouchable...and he would be the one doing the intimadating this time. Or he could be a fish who just stays out of everyone else's way…yeah, that sounded good too. He could intimidate just enough to get them to leave him alone and then he could peacefully go about his own business.
But for now, there were humans to visit. An adolescent and a juvenile human were standing at a corner of the tank on the waiting room side. When the adolescent saw Gill, she turned to the younger girl. "Look, Quinny, a pretty fish! Maybe he'll stay with you while you get your teeth cleaned."
The little girl, who looked to be not much older than a toddler, glanced shyly at Gill. "He looks pretty, but he looks scary too. His eyes are red, Shayleen."
Shayleen gave Quinny a look. "One day, sis, they'll come out with a fairytale about a hero who is ugly and lives in a swamp and a villain who is in this huge castle and wears a crown but is really mean…and a lady who farts and then laughs about it instead of insisting that ladies don't fart!"
"They already have a movie like that. It's called 'Shrek'." (A/N: don't own the creative rights to that, just an old VHS copy!)
"And what did that movie teach us?"
"That fairytales aren't all that's in the world, and you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, and there's more to someone than what they seem."
The big sister's expression softened. "That's right. So what do you think of that fish there?"
Gill glided up closer to the sisters and pressed his snout above little Quinny's finger. Quinny let out an adorable, overjoyed little giggle. "Hi, pretty fishy!" You know, your eyes aren't evil because there red…they're like rubies! And rubies are jewels! You have eyes like jewels, fishy!"
Gill smiled back at Quinny. Neptune, he would miss having these humans all to himself when the new fish came. Shayleen smiled briefly, but then Barbara, the dentist's receptionist, called Quinny's name.
The little girl's smile vanished and she looked pleadingly at Gill. "Could you stay with me while I get my teeth all sparkly? My sister's going to choir practice at the big opera house and I don't want to be alone."
Gill nodded and forgot about his future tank mates for a short time. Quinny and the dentist were chatting like old friends not too far into the appointment; but Quinny still made sure to look over towards the red glow of the aquarium for Gill every so often. And Gill didn't even bother to hide how pleased he felt; who knew if he'd ever get to be like this with humans again?
Later that week, Gill's first tank mate arrived: a pink seastar named Peach who had come from a place called EBay. She seemed very scared at first, and so Gill gave her some space for awhile. She hung out in a corner of the tank on the shipwreck side, opposite Gill's pirate skull home. At first there were only awkward nods between the two, Gill interested in discretely watching humans and Peach interested in the things humans looked at, but by the end of the second week, apparently she had had enough of the two of them just floating around each other. While they were eating, she looked Gill right in the eyes and said, "Hi. My name's Peach. What's yours?"
Gill stared at her for a moment. Her eyes were black and beady, yet she seemed to hold no hostility toward him—only curiosity. Gill knew from experience, though, that he shouldn't just assume. Tyranos had seemed nice enough at first too; but when he realized how passive the others were, he jumped at the chance to be the boss. Gill had made the mistake of telling Tyranos about his interest in humans before Tyranos had shown his true colors, and Gill was not about to make the same mistake with Peach. "Gill," he said quietly.
Peach seemed nervous under Gill's intense stare. "I…uh, I came from EBay. Where did you come from?"
Gill carelessly flicked his tail toward the window behind them that faced the harbor. "The rief."
Peach's eyes widened. "The rief—as in…the ocean? Wow. That's amazing."
Gill sure didn't feel the same. "It's just the ocean. Nothing too fancy." And nothing too pleasant mostly.
"Oh, come on. All that open space, all the different places to live…I bet the coral in the ocean doesn't collapse when a pregnant starfish tries to sleep on it! That happened to my mom. A couple of us survived, though. I was sent over here after my last human decided he didn't want starfish anymore. But I like it here. This place is way better than my last aquarium. The dining is actually tolerable and the temperature and the lighting and everything doesn't actually cause me any stress. I can't say I wasn't glad to leave. That guy didn't know how to take care of marine creatures. Sorry, uh, am I rambling?"
"You're fine. You're also in good hands. Our guy knows what he's doing."
"That's a relief. So what's your story?"
Gill sighed. "There's not much of one. My school all found mates, I was on my own, and eventually I was picked up by the dentist."
To Gill's relief, Peach seemed satisfied with that. The conversation moved on to what happened around here and why. Gill told Peach what he knew about dentistry—which wasn't all that much. But Peach told Gill that a relative of her previous owner had been studying dentistry and she knew quite a bit of vocabulary and was familiar with the basics.
"You really remember all that?" Gill asked, genuinely impressed.
"Well," Peach mumbled, looking away shyly, "They—they left their textbook open a lot, so I just read when I was bored."
"Whoa. You can read? In the ocean, you're only taught to read if you show enough intelligence and you have a genuine interest. I never did," Gill lied quickly. On the contrary, he had more than a little interest, but he had been afraid of fish asking the reason behind the interest.
Peach didn't seem too uncomfortable around Gill. Yes, she was a little nervous at first, but politeness and courtesy soon remedied that. Gill's plan of being polite enough wile still keeping his guard up, of allowing his tank mates to feel at ease while at the same time making it clear to them that he wasn't about to spill any secrets, seemed to work well enough. It worked fine with Bloat and Jacques, at least.
Bloat was a brown puffer from a pet store called Bob's Fish Mart. He adjusted really well to the tank; he got along well with Peach and seemed to respect Gill's desire for privacy. He was gentle for the most part (although theatrical and hot-tempered at times). Human children seemed far too interested in watching puffers blow up, which meant that Bloat's line of defense had become to easily triggered in captivity (luckily, it was just as easily reversed). Gill found Bloat's presence and relaxed demeanor soothing and Peach and Bloat soon found a great source of entertainment: the dental procedures. Gill only half followed them—he was more interested in the humans themselves—their behavior, their tendencies, their mannerisms—than he was in these specific and oddly detailed procedures that they performed on one another.
Jacques, a cleaner shrimp, was apparently a gift from the French prime minister (Gill only knew that because of how Excitedly Philip chattered about it several days before Jacques arrived). Jacques didn't really speak that much English at all, but was a fast learner at picking up a phrase or gesture here and there, so the language barrier never posed too big of a problem. The shrimp busied himself with cleaning, as most cleaner shrimps do, and Gill soon grew indifferent to seeing Jacques pop out of nowhere or invade a personal space momentarily just to clean and dash off again.
In regard to tank fish overall, Gill thought they seemed oddly…sheltered compared to what Gill knew; like juvenile ocean fish almost: naïve and trusting—unaware of the danger and deception of predators; placing all their trust in the creature who cared for them and becoming too used to it. But though humans were the source of food and health to tank fish, and although the quality of tank life depended completely on the human managing the aquarium, if the human made smart decisions about the fish and the environment like Phillip did, tank fish were free to be whoever they pleased; there was no need to hide or to protect yourself against your tank mates. Gill soon learned, however, that not all tank life was paradise. Tank life could require adaptation to a changing environment, much like the ocean. Philip called all of his fish "rescues," and the last three fish to join the aquarium had definitely been in need of one.
Bubbles was a Hawaiian yellow tang who came from fish o rama. Like any of his species, he was hyperactive and took as much advantage of the swimming space as Gill had. But Bubbles—well, they all assumed his name was Bubbles—he didn't say much unless it was something to do with Bubbles. He did respond to that name, which was good enough for Gill. This yellow ball of energy clung to the treasure chest in the tank (which released an endless stream of bubbles when opened) like it was his life line. It was like this fish considered bubbles the only constant thing he could rely on. This was probably true, Gill thought. Peach had explained to Gill earlier that a pet store was a place where humans sold animals to other humans, and often times, the time at a pet store and before a permanent home with a human was very nerve-racking and stressful. And if there were less than positive experiences with a human, it could negatively affect an animal's mind.
When Gurgle, a royal gramma, came from PetPalace, Gill began to realize how fortunate he was to land in Dr. Shermann's aquarium. Pet Palace had recently shut down due to poor management and badly maintained living conditions, and the dentist had saved Gurgle, who was one of the few surviving fish. Unsurprisingly, poor Gurgle had developed an intense fear of germs due to that experience and so he spent most of his time near Jacques. Fortunately, Jacques understood how traumatized Gurgle was and didn't mind being at his beck and call…mostly.
Debb was either a blue-and-white-striped damsel fish or a humbug—Gill was not sure. She was shipped here, like Peach. But she didn't really talk about where she'd come from. Debb was really quite cheerful and loved to join the others in watching dental appointments. And like the rest of the tank fish, she was very peaceful toward Gill (Bubbles seemed to care about nothing but his namesake, and Gurgle virtually ignored Gill, which Gill wasn't too sure what to make of yet). The only thing really strange about Debb was her…sister. She spoke to her reflection and called it "Flo." Flo was a coping mechanism, though, like Bubbles' bubbles, so Gill didn't really think much about trying to shatter Debb's illusion. Thankfully, the other fish seemed to think along the same lines .
Living in a tank could be safer than the ocean in some ways (food, shelter, health, etc.) but unstable in other ways. There was no guarantee of a home for life…or a long life. It all depended on the human whom you lived with. Gill did his best to reassure his new tank mates, though, that their dentist knew what he was doing and would make every effort to take care of them all. Fortunately that didn't need much convincing. It didn't take long for the fish to see for themselves how attentive Phillip was to their needs. Apart from Bloat and Gurgle getting into arguments which Debb usually settled, Gurgle's almost irrational attachment to Jacques, and Bubbles random outbursts of mania over his favorite thing, tank life quickly became peaceful once more.
Additionally, humans gathered around the tank more often to watch a favorite fish, so Gill could be even more discrete about his interest in his favorite species. Gill secretly agreed with his tank mates' overall view of humans: the good ones like the dentist would take good care of them. But even to these fish, humans were just there to feed them and keep them healthy and it was just a bonus if they were entertaining. Humans themselves weren't really creatures to interact with. So Gill was still different. Even fish that grew up and matured around humans didn't want to have any kind of relationship with them other than symbiosis. And Gill still had the ocean rules to follow. Yes, he only followed them out of habit and fear at this point, but he would be considered weird even in the eyes of the tank gang if they knew how much he liked humans, and so Gill's human-watching (which was taken advantage of as often as possible) continued to be a secret; and in the evenings, Gill limited his interactions with the other fish to avoid prying questions. Gill could just "not disagree" and then he wasn't technically agreeing with the idea of potentially good humans. As far as he knew, the humans here were mostly peaceful and kind enough toward marine life, unlike the nightmarish ones that ocean fish were taught to fear. And having tank mates who were indifferent to humans was far better than having schoolmates that were anti-human at least. So even though he still had to hide, Gill preferred this secrecy in a tank to the secrecy required in the ocean—much easier to handle. And much, much more to learn this way.
One particular afternoon, Gill was gazing out the tank wall on the tropical side, looking out into the waiting room. The human activity here was more interesting than on the other side to Gill, so the others watching the dental procedures worked out really conveniently for him. Today, he found himself staring at a mother human and her baby. At least, Gill assumed it was a baby: it was small and needy and mostly helpless. The mother was holding a long something to its mouth and the baby, who had been making distressed noises, quieted down and began working its jaw and the stuff inside the long something started to disappear. Baby human food, Gill guessed. A human male came toward mother and baby after a moment and the two adult humans stared down at the baby together and then gazed at each other. They were mates, then—the way they held each other's gazes was unmistakable. They were mates, and that baby human was theirs. Gill couldn't tear his eyes away from these three humans. He stared at the little human family until the receptionist called them in. Usually he would just let them go and look around to watch the other humans in that room, maybe the younger ones would play with the toys in the corner…but the humans in there now were adolescents or adults and all engaged in staring at what was in their hands: some had hard rectangular things they would tap here and there and some had big flimsy things that crinkled and had weird squiggles on them that had been picked up from the tables in the waiting room. Boring zombie humans. So Gill slunk back through the plants to the other side and slid behind his skull where the others wouldn't see him (one good thing about his time in the ocean as a youth: he got good at sneaking). He wasn't sure what it was about the idea of a family with humans that he liked so much…
In the other corner of the tank, the six other inhabitants were eagerly watching Dr. Shermann prepare for a surgery. Peach saw the IV stand and the O2 mask and gasped. "Someone's going under!" she said excitedly.
"Oooooo!" chorused the others. Bloat and Debb and Gurgle were huddled around Peach, trying to see as much as they could and Debb was whining to Flo about being in the way; uncharacteristically, Bubbles was still and silent, waiting in eager anticipation; Jacques was calmly resting on one of Gurgle's raised fins so he could see. Soon, much to the excitement of every fish in the tank, the family entered the office and the female adult human laid in the chair, looking a little scared.
As he bounced the fussy baby, the husband asked his wife softly, , "Love, which fish in the aquarium is your favorite?"
"I like all of them. I'm just gonna watch them until I'm out." The wife gazed into the aquarium as the dentist explained how the drugs for surgery worked and gave the husband a brief 'what-should-happen' with regards to the gause and the pain that came after wisdom teeth removal. After the husband and baby left, the dentist connected the IV and the gas mask. There was some idle chitchat to calm the patient down, but soon enough, she was unconscious and the dentist picked up something…sharp.
And Gill slipped back to the waiting room. He didn't like seeing humans getting cut up, even if it was to help them. He caught some bits of Peach's commentary and Bloat's and Debb's reactions ("Oh, I think he's got a tooth! Yup, there's that second impacted tooth. Wow, these are deep." "I wonder how many are in there? Does she need all four out?" "I hope so—this is actually fun to watch.") But Gill didn't really want to listen. So he watched the male human and baby waiting on the other side of the tank. Now that he was away from his mate, the male wasn't wearing his confident, it-will-be-allright face anymore. He took out one of those hard rectangular things from his pocket, and soon the door opened and an adolescent male came inside.
"Hello, little cousin," he cooed to the baby. "Hey, Uncle. You okay? She should be halfway done already." The father sighed, and his nephew gave him a sympathetic look. "I can take my little cousin," he said, reaching out for the baby and waiting patiently as the father handed her over. "You know me, Uncle: I love babies. I know how to take care of her. You just take care of Auntie. We're family: we can handle this together. But, Uncle, it is just wisdom teeth!"
Inside the tank, Gill heaved a sigh as he watched the cousins leave. Not for the first time, he wished to have that bond he saw in some human families…but the forbidden part was just this: he wished to be a part of one of those families. He could be happy…he could feel loved…he could be free to show his love for his humans. But Gill couldn't have his own human. He had to share the humans he did get to see with six other fish that wouldn't understand him, and that was just what he would have to live with.
On the other side of the plants, the gang were discussing the wisdom teeth. "I can't believe all four came out!" Bubbles said, excitedly swimming circles around the group. "That was—was—was crazy fast how he got them all!" That was it for Bubbles, though. He would happily listen to the others now as he played with his beloved bubble box.
Gurgle spoke next. "I can't believe she all thought we were all from the ocean. Can you imagine? I can only hope that there's more good bacteria in that place than bad!" And off he went, muttering about nightmarish germs and how he would go crazy without a working filter and a caretaker who knew how to feed him the right way.
Debb picked up the conversation. "Yeah, it's funny that she thought we were all from the ocean when we're all from pet stores!"
"Well, not all of us," Peach said. "Only one of us is from the ocean. And by now," she added, voice raised so Gurgle was sure to hear, "if Jacques hasn't decontaminated him enough, the filter definitely has."
And then Bubbles was back, and he and Debb and Jacque and Bloat and even Gurgle were gathering around Peach, asking for details. Peach told them that Gill came from a place called a rief and described pictures that she had seen, but couldn't tell them much else. To fish that had only known tank life, the ocean was this exotic place that everyone had only ever heard about; no one knew or had seen what the ocean was like, but it was something they all daydreamed of…the ocean was open water with many a place to call home and plenty to do…and there was exponentially more freedom, possibilities, wonder, beauty…but also danger. Exciting danger, but danger. "Gill lived in the ocean for a while, I think," Peach said. "He told me the rest of his school got mates before he was captured."
"Woooow," Bubbles murmured. "Some humans at FishORama called the ocean 'the big blue' once. I wonder if it's really that big and that blue. Gill knows a lot, I bet." And then he was swimming excitedly about again. "Hey, we should ask him!"
"Uh, I don't think that's a good idea," Peach warned, and Gurgle grabbed Bubbles before he could rush off. . "I think it might have been, well, I'm not sure if he really liked it there."
"What makes you say that?" Bloat asked.
"I don't know. He never talks about it. I mean, I know he doesn't talk much at all, but when it was just the two of us, sometimes he'd talk to me. And I got the impression that he didn't have the best time in the ocean."
"Yeah, but he could still teach us what he knows. That way, if we ever get out there, we'd be prepared," Bloat said. And, spotting Gill gliding toward his skull to wait till food came, Bloat called out, "Hey, Gill?"
Gill froze where he was. Great: they were trying to talk to him when he wanted nothing more than to forget they were there. All he wanted was to go back to his skull and only come out to eat before going to sleep, like usual. But he didn't want to be a complete jerk and ignore Bloat, so he turned and gave the puffer fish a weary, impatient sort of look. "Yeah?"
And now six pairs of eyes were drilling into Gill, who was stonily gazing back. Finally, Peach spoke. "Gill, what—what was life like in the ocean? If we ever ended up there, what would we need to know?" And then the words were tumbling from her mouth. "Is it really as magnificent as the pictures? How do we know how to avoid predators? How do we know what to eat and how to pick a place to live? Could you teach us? I mean, you used to live there. Could you tell us about it—what it was like there?"
What it was like…it was like nothing he would ever want to experience again. All that open water…all the beautiful seascape…and he hadn't really felt free at all there. Gill closed his eyes and sighed. He couldn't just tell them all. He had to keep his walls up lest someone find a crack and break through. Gill came from a fish-eat-fish world in more ways than one.
Bubbles watched Gill for awhile, who appeared to be deep in thought. Finally, Bubbles innocently asked, "Is it very blue?"
Eyes still closed, Gill said "Yeah" very softly.
"And…is it really so big that it's it's own world?" Debb asked. "Like it's completely separate from the world that has all the creatures of the air?"
"Yeah."
"Is the sea really that open and is every fish that free to swim anywhere?"
"Yeah."
"Is it beautiful like the pictures? Are there really that many colors and places and possibilities?"
"Yes."
"Is it safe?"
"Is food easy to find?"
"If we ever got there…would you teach us how to survive there?"
Gill opened his eyes and looked straight at his tank mates. "Sure. If we ever get there, I'll teach you guys all about food and safety and tricks for escaping predators." At the word predators, the gang visibly flinched. Gill continued speaking. "Yes, there are predators. There are bigger fish that will think of nothing else but eating you. But there are ways to know where a predator is and there are ways to escape them." As if they'd ever get to the ocean…what reason would they have to leave here? But the others just gazed at Gill intently, wrapped around his fin, hanging on his every word.
The fish food came raining down and everyone scrambled to have there share. Gill ate quietly like usual, but the others were animatedly discussing the ocean…or rather, what they dreamed about the ocean. Bubbles talked about how much space (and of course how many bubbles) there would be; Peach went on and on about how beautiful it must look and how many places there were to live; Debb gushed about the beauty and the potential for more friends and companions; Bloat was all about the variety of food; Jacques and Gurgle were passively listening but no less excited. And Gill tried to retire to his pirate's skull as quickly as he could.
But Peach stopped him. "Hey, Gill?"
"What?"
"Sorry if we were annoying you or something. It's just…the ocean's this amazing place that we've all heard about but never been, you know? You know, like that place you always wanted to explore but never could?"
"I know." Gill knew all too well. "And I meant what I said: if we ever get back there, I'll help all of you learn how to survive there. It'll be hard, but it won't be impossible."
Peach smiled. "Thanks, Gill." And she turned and attached herself to the tank wall. And Gill glided towards his nice dark skull.
They were looking up to him. They all thought that the ocean was this fish paradise (but Gill knew better). But all it took was a promise of helping them to survive once they got there and those fish-eat-fish concerns were not as concerning. They were putty in his fins now. Gill also knew that someone on top could make the rules of the school and pretty much not be hurt. He didn't want to be a Tyranos, but he liked the idea of not being bullied by his tankmates. So what if Gill was the mysterious, private ocean fish? Nobody could question him or emotionally scar him anymore. He promises them to guide them and assist them if they ever reach the ocean (like that should ever need to happen), and they will leave him to his own business. And then he could keep his secret and nobody would ever know that he doesn't agree with the traditions he was taught (or even what those traditions are). This could work; this was a role he easily fits into. And he didn't have to even do anything…it just sort of happened…so he'll just go with it.
this life was okay…for awhile. But a certain little female human soon shook up everything the tank gang thought they knew about their new home along with a water-and-fish-filled plastic bag.
A/N: I try to wring my brain out like a sponge to write well and…this comes out. I feel like this chapter could have been a gazillion times better. And it took for freaking ever! I hope it's not too bad or too long or too expositiony! I wanted to throw that beloved initiation ceremony in here, but I found a better place for it next chapter (I think.)