If Only

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Thisis my AU version of an alternate ending to Love and Die in LA. Some Angst, some canon but mostly AU. All things are the same till the Gantz ending, Previously notes courtesy of Dust Jackets dot com.

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

Chapter 22

Previously

Kate takes two steps and hugs Darlene and whispers something to her,

"I know you will, like someone told me, if we weren't meant to be, at least I'm glad someone who loves him as much or more than me is going to be with him"

"Rick, this is your time to reconnect, I'm going back to the loft and start making arrangements for the changes, call me if you, any of you need anything, I love you all"

He holds her for a moment, "Best Friends Forever, Right?"

"Right" she says and gently kisses him good bye

********************************************************************************/

Outside Saint Michaels

25 Minutes Later

Rick, Kate, and Alexis were asked to step into a private room as the Honor Guard from the NYPD prepared to salute Martha on her final trek to the Hearse waiting in front of the church. Police lines had been formed to keep the crowd back and allow the procession to proceed.

There would be no gravesite services, in order to keep the privacy of the family's final resting place, so this would be the only opportunity for NYPD to honor Martha Rogers and in some manner thank her son, Rick Castle for all he had done for them.

The Pall Bearers accompanied the casket, followed by Father Francis, and Rick walking with one arm wrapped around Alexis, on the other side his arm wrapped around Kate holding her close.

As they proceeded to the open doors of the church, the Honor Guard came to attention, and proceeded to honor Martha with 21 gun salute, the guards all snapped to attention as the procession passed through their raised swords, a crisp salute offered to honor all this wonderful woman had given, It was a very touching moment for Rick, as he looked up to see LT, a huge patrolman standing so tall, erect with tears running down his cheeks. Rick gave him a sad smile as they passed.

The arrangements would be for Kate, Rick, Alexis and Darlene to attend a private ceremony as Martha was placed in the family Mausoleum, later that afternoon. Martha was insistent that the party come first, then hours later conclude the service. Her note to Rick, "I'm dead Richard, but there's always time for a good party, enjoy it, and know that I'd be there if I could."

Once the Hearse was on it's way, the family stood in a line to thank all those who attended and invite them once again to the reception across the street. It seemed almost natural and like they had done it a thousand times before, Kate standing by his side, her arm never leaving his back, or holding his hand. It seemed she needed the physical contact as much as he did.

After what seemed forever, they had finally thanked the last of the attendee's and proceeded across the street to the hall and reception. It was truly a celebration, not a sob fest, for a life well lived, one who taught her family that age was merely a number, and for her granddaughter, seize the moment, life owes you nothing, you make your breaks.

Rick had broken away from all of the guests, after whispering in Kate's ear and getting a nod, smile and quick kiss on his cheek. As he slipped out to a private space, he pressed the familiar number on speed dial,

"Hey, it's me, I just wanted to check to see if you made it back to the loft, well more than that I need to know if you're OK. I mean this all happened so fast, we really didn't get a chance to talk about it."

"Rick, you're the sweetest man I have ever met, thanks for checking and yes, I'm safe. I talked to the bank and the attorney so the paperwork will be ready to sign when ever you're ready. I took your advice, I called Jimmy and it seems he knew it was me that night as well, but he wasn't going to say anything to break up a happy couple as he put it."

"Darlene, I wish th*"

"Stop Rick, we're best friends first, last, and always and that's enough. Without you coming into my life I have no idea where I would be. I knew you loved Kate, I just didn't know how deeply. I'm glad actually, the way I see this, I got to spend 6 months of my life, and don't repeat this, with some of the best sex I ever had, with my best friend. That led us both to the person we were supposed to be with all along, but let human emotions almost spoil it"

"Yeah, you're right, I'm just so happy that we can still be Best Friends, oh by the way, Why didn't you ever tell me you talked to Mother, Kate, and Alexis every week?"

She laughed, "And feed the enemy, only kidding, Rick, I didn't want to bring up old wounds, when we got together you would hurt as you relived the whole experience all over again, I didn't want to do that to you. I did drop hints that Kate was doing fine, even had Alexis do some of the work, we just didn't want you to hurt again."

"You're something else you know that, Thank You for the compassion, Love and all you have done for me, Kate and my family, I can never repay you."

"Sure, you can, but it's going to be tough, I hope you can do it, I mean nothing in the works but IF the time comes, "

"What are you asking Dar,"

"Rick, Jimmy and I are going to start seeing each other again, and unless he's changed or grown an extra limb, I'm not waiting years. If he doesn't ask, I am going to so when and if we get married, I want you to walk me down the aisle if it's OK with Kate. Rick don't you and Kate wait too long either, I know let the dust settle, then make up for lost time, she truly loves you, more than anything."

"You're right, and when or if that day comes, I'm sure Kate will not only be there but support you as well, we want you to be happy, all of us. You're stuck with us now, part of this family. Speaking of that Kate wanted to know if we can pick you up for the private graveside service in a few hours, I mean you don*"

"Rick, I wouldn't miss it, text me when you're on the way. Now get back to the party and follow Martha's orders, you never know what powers she may have," as she laughs "Oh and Rick, Kiss Kate, don't hold back she's waited so long."

"Tough orders Boss, but I think I can handle it, he laughs, Text you soon, Bye"

Rick returned to the hall, and noticed Kate had been eyeing the door, and sighed in relief when she saw him.

"Babe, how did it go, you look a little worried?"

"Can we talk, there's a private spot right outside here"

Kate stands up and takes his hand, "Sure Rick, whatever it is please, let's work this out together, OK?"

As they entered the small room, Rick turns to look at Kate, took her hands in his, looked deep into those eyes that he had missed so much, not saying a word. He could see the worry come across her face, then he kissed her, Long Deep and Passionately.

She was startled at first, then she returned the kiss, pouring her love and devotion into her lips and her tongue demanded entry to Rick's mouth. Finally, after both were totally out of air she pulled back.

"Babe, what was that, I mean I loved it, it was everything and more I have been dreaming about for years, but what made you choose now, is everything OK with Darlene?"

Rick smiled, "Yeah, everything is fine with Darlene, that was her order for me to kiss you, she said to start loving you the way you deserve and stop holding back. She's contacted her first love, and asked if I would give her away should they get married, if you're OK with that"

Kate was shocked, "married, Rick, isn't that fast, I mean, well I guess not she did date him for three years and unless he's changed tremendously, true love never dies, and of course I'm OK with it, she's our Best Friend now."

"Kate, she also told me not to fall asleep at the wheel this time, how much longer do we need to know there is no one in this world I want to spend my life with than you, but I want you to take a few weeks. We'll proceed at your speed, just know I'm not running this time, I'm here till you kick me to the curb"

Kate breaks down in tears, kisses him again, with even more passion if it were possible, "Thank You Babe, I do love you with all my heart, but you're right, I do need just a little time, I mean one day I am crying myself to sleep over you, then next I'm by your side. I promise it won't be long, OK?"

"More than OK Kate, I love you, always have, always will and when you're ready we'll move ahead."

They return to the party, if the members of the 12th precinct noticed anything different between them, they were smart enough not to say anything.

Alexis had been monitoring her Dad, watching for signs that the death of Grams wasn't being hidden deep in his soul, a tactic he was so good at doing. What she saw when they returned was two people absolutely glowing in love. She smiled and looked upwards, guess her Grams really did know how to handle her Dad.

The party broke up about an hour later, with Rick thanking every member of the 12th who had come, even talking briefly with Espo and Ryan, hugging and kissing Lanie on the cheek and speaking privately with Captain Montgomery for a few minutes.

Rick texted Darlene they were on their way, and she was in the lobby when the town car pulled up. A short drive to the cemetery, after some evasive driving by Rick's security team to insure privacy, they arrived at the huge building marked Rogers on the outside.

A few moments later the Hearse arrived and for the last time, Alexis, Kate, Darlene and Rick bid their farewell to Martha Rogers, Actress, Mother, Grandmother, and architect of love to reunite the two people she loved so very much. As her coffin was loaded into the vault, a soft version of My Way played, which brought a smile to everyone's face. Yes, she lived her life to the end, doing things her way,

"Rest in peaceful sleep Martha, Thank You for showing me that loving someone and being in love were totally different, we did it, they're back together again" Darlene whispered not knowing that she had been heard by Alexis, Kate and Rick.

Rick smiled, even 2,000 miles separation couldn't stop Mother from having her say, but as always, She had been right all along.

TBC