If Only

by Castlefan6

Authors Note: Thisis my AU version of an alternate ending to Love and Die in LA. Some Angst, some canon but mostly AU. All things are the same till the Gantz ending, Previously notes courtesy of Dust Jackets dot com.

I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only

Chapter 26

Previously

"Darlene, ?"

"Yes Kate? Level with us, where's the ring?"

"What do you mean?"

"Detective, Duhh, your finger has a ring imprint"

Jimmy starts laughing and says "that's twenty bucks Darlene, told you she would spot it"

Darlene takes a chain from around her neck and places a beautiful diamond back on her finger,

"I didn't want to crowd you and Rick's day, Jimmy asked last Friday and it's all new to me."

Another round of hugs and squeals from the ladies

Three Weeks Later,

Wedding Day – 1 day 5:30 AM

Hamptons Beach Home

Kate couldn't believe it; the three weeks had flown by and as she looked out the patio of the Hamptons home in 24 hours or so she would be marrying the man of her dreams. She's lost in her thoughts when her daughter slips in beside her on the glider,

"Hey Mom, everything OK? The limo picked up Darlene and Jimmy and they are at the wedding suite at the Hampton Inn, with the driver standing by to bring them here. Their fight was delayed so I just made alternate arrangements for housing for them,"

Kate looked up with tears in her eyes, and pulls her close to her

"I really don't know what I would do without you, Alexis you have been a God Send to me and your Dad handling this for us, I love you, but I want you to know I appreciate the hard work you have done. Sweetie you've made this a wedding full of love and family."

"Mom, you and Dad turning the full wedding planning over to me, in place of that Wedding Planner with so many big events in her experience, gave me the confidence that you had in me.

Thank You for allowing me to pay back some of the Love I've been given through the years. Dad loves you more than anything in the world, and you make him happy, happier than he's ever been. You complete us both Mom, you didn't know it, but you were the missing piece to make this family complete."

Kate's tears spill down her face as she holds her daughter a little tighter,

"OH Lexi, you, your Dad, and your Grams have made me the happiest woman in the world, I never want to forget that. For years I thought I was chasing happiness, but now I see if your Dad hadn't been, well your Dad, I would still be on that journey to lonely life if I survived. Thanks for being patient with me, and your Dad, I know we frustrated the hell out of you often." As a teary smile breaks through.

"Grams used to say, Patience Kiddo, keep leading the jackasses to the feed trough, they'll eventually figure out what to do." As both break out in laughter,

"Well your Grams was right, as usual. If only I hadn't been so stubborn, *"

"Mom, you weren't the only one, and if I recall I had some attitude adjustments that were needed pretty badly at sometimes, I'm glad Grams was as tough as she was. She knew you were the one, that's why she loved you so much. She left me a note, and told me if you ever married Dad I was to give you these, as your something old and blue," as she opened a box of beautiful sapphire ear rings, with a matching necklace.

"They're not pierced so if you want, just wear the necklace, but she was insistent you received these."

"They're beautiful Lexi, are you sure, I mean these belong to you, you are blood*"

"Grams said you would say something like that so there's a note under the holder in the box, it's from Grams to you. I'm going to go see about some things but Mom, I'm happy you're going to be Dad's wife, we love you." She kissed Kate's cheek and set off with her clipboard by her side.

Kate struggled with trembling hands, to finally pull up the lining of the box, and there in her stationary, was the note folded with Katherine, on it.

Kate took a moment to remember the sweet lady that she loved, almost like her mother, then began to read the note.

"Dearest Katherine,

If you're reading this, two things have happened, you've agreed to marry my son and I'm gone from this earth, but with you all in spirit. I wanted you to know that Richard has loved you since he first met you, a Mother knows her children, and he changed when he met you, my boyish little man grew up. Thank you for all you have done for this family, Alexis has wanted you to be her Mom since you stayed with us, you have done more for her than her well I'll stop there.

Please do me one favor, always remember to put each other first in everything, and never stop dating. If you do that Alexis will have some little siblings as she has always wanted. You may think your Mother and I are gone, but we're not, we're the wind blowing through the pines, we're the clouds floating in the sky, and the wave crashing the beach. Live life Darling, we'll be here to back you up, as you used to say have your Six, I think, anyway.

Have a wonderful wedding, and always remember that it's the first day of forever for you both. Wishing you both happiness, know you both are loved still,

Martha"

Kate smiled through tears at Martha's referral to having your six, she was still with them. As she looked up the sun broke through the clouds, a gentle wind blew through her hair, and she had goosebumps run over her arm, and she knew her Moms were there for her.

7:30 AM

Kate thought Rick had been asleep but in reality, he had witnessed Alexis and her on the glider and her reading the note. He knew from the box, what it was, and also just how much Martha had valued that set. Rick had a surprise of his own, he had enlisted the help of his future father in law, but together they were able to put together a montage of pictures from little Katie's days in the tub, to the day she graduated from the Academy and the badge pinning ceremony.

There was a break in the timeline, obviously the tough times Jim had suffered, so Rick had music overlaid with her parents favorite song, then the pictures resumed all the way up to her saying yes, he had captured that on the security cam and had it cleaned up and edited.

There had been enough footage of home movies for Tori to capture her Mom's voice and she then used technology to simulate a wedding day message to her, one Jim wrote.

Rick really hoped it would make her happy not sad but he wanted to give it to her today so she wouldn't cry all day tomorrow, her wedding day.

Jim and Darlene's limo pulled up just as he had finished the final edits, and place the thumb drive securely in his pocket, he'd pick the time to show her when it was right. Squeals come from the house as both Alexis and Kate made a beeline to the car.

"Darlene, I'm so glad you made it, I'm sorry I had to change arrangements but I thought that would give you more privacy coming in late, and you could arrive when you woke."

Darlene pulled her into a hug, on Alexis, it's so good to see you, My Gosh, you've grown so much, and the arrangements were perfect. This is Jimmy Barnes, my fiancé, Jimmy this is Alexis, Kate and Rick's daughter."

It wasn't lost on anyone that Darlene had made it known she was Kate's daughter, she knew just how much love the two had for each other.

The day flew by, since it was only going to be Alexis as Maid of Honor, and Mayor Bob Weldon as Best Man, the rehearsals were over and done in less than 45 minutes. By 4:00 PM all the guests from the city had arrived, Captain Montgomery and his wife, Kevin and Jenny, Javi and Lanie, and Maddie and her guest. Alexis had set two empty chairs facing the altar, one to represent each Mom, and rather than present a rose to the parent, Rick and Kate would lay the rose on the empty chair and return to the altar, yes Alexis had even thought of that.

Alexis checked in on Kate who was with Darlene, Maddie, Lanie and Evelyn Montgomery taking advantage of the in-home massage service.

"Mom, you OK, do you need anything?"

"Just one thing Sweetie,"

"What do you need Mom, I'll get it right to you?"

"Baby I need you to relax, you have worked yourself to death, it's perfect, I couldn't have dreamed it any more perfect than you've made it. Would you join us now that massage table is yours"

Alexis walked over kissed Kate on the cheek, "Sure Mom, be right back."

Hamptons Beach House,

6:30 PM

Rick had chosen to have catered meal brought in, and after it was complete, he asked Kate to come with him as the rest followed. Jim was on her side as they walked into the theater room, and all filled in behind.

"Kate, I hope you like this, I'm giving it to you today because I don't want all our wedding pictures with you crying, people will get the wrong idea" as the crowd laughs.

Jim sits in a chair on one side, Rick on the other side. Can we have the lights please, then he presses the small remote, the pictures begin to appear floating on one at a time to form the montage,

"Dad, I should kill you, my baby pictures in the nude," she laughs with tears in her eyes,

As she continues to watch her eyes tear as Mike Royce pins her shield on her, and salutes, then the music of her parents as musical notes float across the screen, then the picture of her Mom just three weeks before she was murdered sitting on the couch,

The tears are pooling but not falling yet, then she hears a voice she hasn't heard for years,

"Katie, you know I'm with you in Spirit, and if these words are messed up, blame your Dad, I didn't get a vote in what I was saying, then her beautiful laugh echoed out. We want you to know how proud we are of you, your decision, and the woman you are. Always chase happiness over anything my Darling Daughter, you're in good hands now, just be there for your family, it's time to live your life, and remember, I'm always only a breath away, we love you, don't we Jim, as Jim's voice could be heard Yes Dear"

Laughter gently spreads, as Kate, looks at Rick then her Dad,

"How did you do that, it really is Mom's voice and Dad's standard answer yes dear" as she turns to hug him.

Rick see's that the gift is priceless and not hurtful as Kate turns to him, "I love you more than you'll ever know, Mom would have loved you, and Rick, this gift if priceless. How did you do that, Mom never recorded anything."

Rick smiled and gave his answer, "I know a guy,"

Kate smacks him and then kisses him forgetting there was anyone else around finally when they broke for air, there was applause coming from their friends.

At 9:00 Rick and the Gentlemen guests were headed to the hotel, to allow the women to finish the preparations, in reality a chance to gossip more about them. The next morning Alexis had arranged a light breakfast for the ladies at the Beach House, and Rick for the men at the hotel. The ceremony began at 11:00 AM, and Alexis was firm, "be here no later than 10:30 AM, don't make me look for you", as they all laughed but knew she was serious.

Hamptons Beach House

Wedding Day 10:30 AM

The car carrying Rick and all of the male guest who had stayed at the hotel arrived right on schedule. Rick and Uncle Bob were ushered to a side room, by the pool, as Alexis came in to check on them both, looking lovely and far more mature than the 16 years of age she was,

"Alexis, your beautiful pumpkin, and Thank You for all of your hard work to make this day special, it means so much more than you know,"

"Thanks, I know Daddy, Mom deserves happiness, and that's what she's going to get starting today, Uncle Bob let me straighten your tie and we'll be ready to start in just a few minutes, listen for your cue OK Daddy?"

"I will Sweetheart, Love you"

"Love you too," and she was off,

As Rick and Bob double check, yes Rick had his vows, Bob had the rings, what was the cue again, oh yes, the song From This Moment by Shania Twain.

Across the house on the other side, Kate and Alexis were going through a similar check list, as Kate was a little nervous,

"Mom, your beautiful stop worrying and enjoy your day, please." As she kissed her gently on the cheek, making sure not to disturb the makeup.

The music begins to play as Rick and Uncle Bob walk slowly down the white draped aisle on the grass, to take their positions by Reverend Bleeker, once they are in position, the music fades and Alexis steps out to I Will Always Love You, and begins her walk down the aisle, a short distance behind is Jim and Kate, looking more beautiful than Rick had ever saw her. After all are at the altar the music fades and the Reverend steps forward.

"Dearly Beloved we are gathered today to witness, celebrate and support the forming of one union from two very dear friends, Richard Castle, and Katherine Beckett. I ask at this time, who giveth this woman to be wed?"

Jim answered in a firm voice, "I, James Beckett her father do", as he placed Kate's hand in Ricks, lifts her vail and kisses her cheek, she returns the kiss, and Jim sits beside the two empty chairs.

"Friends, for all who know this couple, we all applaud, and say About Time", as laughter rings out from the crowd. "For all the guests who are here, and if you look around you, each are very special to this couple who wanted this service to remain as intimate and close as they are to each of you. We are missing two very huge components of the couple's life, Johanna Beckett, and Martha Rogers are with us in spirit today, the bride and groom will honor their presence now,"

Rick and Kate join hands, each with a rose, walk to the two empty chairs beside Jim, placing a rose, on each chair, and returned to the altar.

Friends, family, join with me as we say to Rick and Kate,

Your wedding day is one that seems to fly.

It's a day filled with emotion, friends, rings and dances.

Many people remember how fleeting their own wedding day was.

So, I want you to take a few seconds to look onto each other's eyes.

Think about the happiness that you're feeling in this place, in this moment.

Really let that feeling register in your heart and your mind.

Now, I want you to think about your life together in twenty years.

Where are you?

What are you doing?

We all know that your visions of the future are not identical, but always complementary.

Someone once said, "a dream you dream alone is only a dream.

A dream you dream together, that is reality."

And for Kate and Rick, that reality starts now.

Each have prepared their vows, Katherine, please turn to Rick and recite your vows of marriage to him;

The moment that I met you, my life became extraordinary. You taught me to be my best self. To look forward to tomorrow's adventures. And when I was vulnerable, you were strong. I love you, Richard Castle. And I want to live my life in the warmth of your smile and the strength of your embrace. I promise you, I will love you. I will be your friend. And your partner in crime and in life. Always.

They take a second to linger before CASTLE pulls her ring out of his pocket and slips it on her finger, right above her engagement ring.

The moment we met, my life became extraordinary. You taught me more about myself than I knew there was to learn. You are the joy in my heart. You're the last person I want to see every night before I close my eyes. I love you, Katherine Beckett. And the mystery of you is the one I want to spend the rest of my life exploring. I promise to love you, to be your friend and your partner in crime and life, 'til death do us part and for the time of our lives.

By the power vested in me by the state of New York, I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss your bride, as cheers erupt from the small crowd.

They made it, all the way to husband and wife. Their journey had been filled with many twists, turns, hurts, and miscues, but they kept battling, and as a good friend once said, now they would never have to look back and wonder If Only.

A/N The vows are directly quoted from Dust Jackets Dot Com, Epd 7 06, couldn't write anything better.

This concludes If Only, Thanks to all those who stood by me, supported me, even when you had your doubts where the end would wind up at. Thanks for trusting in my judgement.

This story took a toll on me, in patience, in trying to understand the human psyche, and in the attitude of many readers, some in 4 different languages to feel they have the RIGHT to say anything at all, including wishing I was dead. What a sad sick lonely mess of human cells you must be.

I was disappointed with the number of Favorites and follows, I never plead for them as some authors do, and some reviewers concentrating on the nitpicking when I churn out 2-3 chapters daily, there is a recent update from a story started in 2013, which to me is ludicrous. I'm not quitting, but I am stepping aside, just as Pen to Paper said, there is a limit we all can tolerate.

For those loyal enough to stick with me all the way your kind words meant more to me than you know. For those who have sent apologies, all is forgiven but like nails in the fence once said the hole stays.

Later,

Tim