Bellia was very special to me. It seemed like she grew up in a blink of an eye, she was a baby in my arms one minute and a young woman the next. I was blown away by how fierce and fearless she became. She took on every challenge, every assignment from our father with determination and ferocity. I was her teacher and her commanding officer, but it didn't take long for her to start doing whatever she wanted, taking unnecessary risks and ignoring my advise. She was the first of my siblings to openly be in a relationship. She and a boy on Titan fell in love and Bellia never hid it from anyone. She had no fear, and she hadn't lived long enough to see the reproductions of these actions. I warned her to stop, to end it. But she never listened.
With a good book, Kara tipped toed from Thor's room out into the common kitchen and lounge space of the tower. It was her latest favorite ritual: a white Russian and a classic book by the fire place. Usually, she would continue her studies with all of her free time while the world slept at night. But lately, she had been getting so much done during the day, at night, she did what she thought would be more fun. She chewed on her lip as she excitedly went to reach for the vodka on the top shelf when she heard a noise behind her. Spinning around, she saw Steve lounging back in an armchair, facing the fire. She headed toward him, "Hey," she said in a hushed voice to not wake the others, "I didn't know you were here."
Steve nodded solemnly, "Just got back."
"Wanna drink?" Kara held up the vodka bottle, shaking it slightly.
"I'm ok." He answered shortly. After pause, he said, "I can't get drunk. Even if I wanted to."
Kara smiled again and plopped on the couch beside his chair, "Me either. I just like the taste."
Stoic, Steve didn't respond. He just kept looking into the fire. Kara felt slightly annoyed at him for ruining her plans for the night. She would have to find somewhere else to read if he was going to be bringing down the mood in this room. She was about to get up to leave when he spoke.
"Why are you up so late?" he asked, still not turning his vision from the flames.
"I'll let you in on a secret: I actually don't really sleep. I mean I can, sometimes, but I don't need to. I get most my energy from the sun." She waited for a response that didn't come. "Why are you up so late?"
"I couldn't sleep."
More silence.
"Why do you hate me?" Kara felt the words come out of her mouth and realized she couldn't take them back. She didn't really know where to go from there. After a little bit, Steve answered.
"Don't you know that what I feel for you isn't hate?" Steve shook his head slowly, then finally, lifted his eyes to meet hers.
She realized then what she hadn't before. She went over the time she had known him. He was friendly to her in the beginning, she even felt close to him. But he started pulling back the more she grew close to Thor. She realized it was only since they made their relationship public to the team that Steve had spent most his time away from the tower, out on missions for S.H.I.E.L.D. The realization hit her like a truck. She didn't know how to respond.
"Steve," she started, cautiously, "I didn't know…"
"It's fine," Steve shook his head again, "I just don't really like spending time around here, seeing you with him. I thought maybe, when you first got here, that we felt the same way. But you ended up with him."
Kara bite her lip and furrowed her brow. She didn't really know what to say. If this were a different situation, if she was a different person, she could have seen herself with someone like Steve. He was strong, and dependable and honorable. She cared for him and she never wanted him to be hurt. She didn't want anyone to get hurt.
"Steve, I care about you—" she could just muster a whisper, but it wasn't enough. He got up and walked out of the room before she could say anything else.
Kara continued to think about that night into the next morning. She was finding it difficult to concentrate on the conversation Nat, Bruce, and Thor were having. She hugged her knees to her chest and took sips of her coffee as the others laughed and talked.
"Don't you wish you could go?" Bruce laughed to Kara. His question pulled her mind away from last night and into the present.
"Sorry, what? Go where?"
Nat shot her a quizzical look, but answered the question, "Thor was just telling us about Asgard."
"Kara is bored because she has heard it all before," Thor said, smiling and taking another bite of toast.
Kara just shook her head with a small laugh. She didn't want to explain what she was thinking about.
"A city of gold, palaces, a rainbow bridge, it sounds amazing," Bruce added.
"And don't forget the beaches," Thor added proudly, "The softest sand and the clearest water you have ever seen. I will take you someday, Kara."
"Well, I want to go," said Natasha.
"Fine! We will all go!" Thor cheered with a pound of his fists on the table, shaking all of their beverages.
"I've never really been to the beach." Kara admitted, losing her mind to her thoughts a bit, "I think there's so much on earth I've never seen or done yet."
Nat could tell Kara was closing in on herself. She put a hand on Kara's knee, "Then let's go. Let's go see a beach, we'll take a little trip. Tony's got an island I'm sure he would let us stay at. We can get away for a few days." The guys nodded in the background.
Kara smiled at the idea, a chance to get away is just what she wanted. Her smiled faded as Steve walked into the kitchen.
"Would you like to come?" Thor yelled out to him.
Steve poured himself a cup of coffee while Bruce added, "We've decided to go on a trip for a few days to the island. You wanna come? Relax for a bit?"
Steve looked up at Kara before he shook his head, "Sorry, S.H.I.E.L.D. wants me to come back. I don't think I could take the time away."
"Well," Natasha stood up from the table, "Could you give us a ride?"