"Good morning", Diane said as she came into the kitchen and saw Alex staring at her coffee cup with a slight frown.

Alex startled out of her thoughts and looked at her mom. "Morning."

"You okay?"

"Yeah. I just thought about Piper", Alex said like it would explain everything.

Which it kind of did for Diane. "She's been acting a little weird after the panic attack."

"I know. It's not like I mind her spending most of her time with me but I'm worried about her. She looks tired like all the time and when she spends a night, nightmares wake her up every time. She never talks about them and just insists she's fine but she obviously isn't. I don't know what to do", Alex sighed.

"I know it's hard for you. Not knowing what's really going on with her but you just need to give her time", Diane said sympathetically.

Alex nodded. "I guess."

"It might help if you talked her about how you feel?"

"Ugh, no thanks. She would just feel bad and think she's a burden for me. I don't want her to feel forced to talk with me..."

Suddenly something clicked and Diane broke into a wide smile.

"What?" Alex asked confused.

"You've fallen for her." It wasn't even a question.

Alex frowned. "What? Why do you think that?"

"It's written all over your face", Diane grinned. "Have you told her?"

"No! Of course not. I... don't want to scare her off."

Diane laughed. "Why would it scare her off?"

"Have you ever met a person who's running from her feelings more than Piper?" Alex asked with raised eyebrows.

Diane thought about it for a while. "Okay, I guess you're right. But I think that's something she would want to hear. I know she feels the same but she's probably just defiant. Or too afraid to tell you herself."

Alex made an unconvinced sound. "Maybe after whatever is going on now. I think she is already overwhelmed enough."

"Whatever you think is best", Diane said with an encouraging smile. "But seriously you need to talk with her. Just don't force her to talk if she doesn't want."

"Yeah..."

[Piper] - Can I come over?

[Piper] - Polly went to a job interview. I'm bored.

[Alex] - Of course. You're always welcomed, Pipes.

[Piper] - :)

[Piper] - I'll be there in 20

[Alex] - See you then

Piper knew that she was making excuses. She knew that Alex knew it too. She had been alone for so long she had started to enjoy it. Had started to need it. But now with Alex she would always pick Alex over being alone. She just hoped that Alex didn't mind.

When the bus had dropped Piper off to the bus stop near Alex's and Diane's house, she quickly crossed the road and walked the few ten meters.

When she reached the front door, Alex was already there, opening it for her.

"Hi", Piper smiled.

"Hey", Alex greeted softly, adoring the way her girlfriend broke into a wide smile as soon as she saw her. Maybe her mom wasn't so wrong after all.

They hugged tightly like they had done so many times during these few past days. Piper sighed contently before tilting her head upwards and kissing Alex softly.

Alex smiled into the kiss and placed her hands on Piper's hips.

"Jeez, girls. You're going to let all the flies inside!"

Alex chuckled and Piper looked over Alex's shoulder to see smirking Diane standing behind her. Piper was pretty sure Diane's favorite hobby was to interrupt their kisses.

"Sorry", Piper said, trying to sound even a little bit apologetic as she stepped inside with Alex and closed the door behind her.

Diane just laughed and went to a living room to continue watching TV.

"Do you want anything? Food? Drink?" Alex asked.

"Nah, I'm good. I'm already stealing all of your time, wouldn't want to steal all of your food too."

It was said in a light tone, attempting to be a joke but Alex knew better. Knew that Piper didn't mean it as a joke. Piper's avoided gaze and her balled fists that she was trying to hide in her jeans back pockets were enough proof that she really thought that, at least sometimes.

Alex wrapped her hand around Piper's shoulders. "What else would I be doing with my time than letting my lovely girlfriend steal it?"

Piper turned to look at Alex somewhat surprised. Alex sounded sincere. "Really?"

"Of course. I like having you around", Alex smiled as they started to walk towards her room.

Piper smiled at herself. It didn't feel like Alex was only saying that so Piper wouldn't feel bad.

When they got into Alex's room, Piper unceremoniously crashed down onto Alex's bed and Alex chuckled before joining her.

"So, where did Polly find a job?"

"Oh, she tries to get a deal with Target that she could work like two or three weeks there. I already told her that I'm not driving her out to live at a hotel anymore but she wanted to be able to 'pay me back' or something like that", Piper explained with an eye roll. She was already thinking the ways she could say no.

"Okay. You two are good then?"

"Yeah... yeah. I'd say so. It's just so weird. It's so natural to be with her but at the other hand so awkward. I don't know how to act around her but I notice I'm slipping everyday more familiar behavior with her."

Alex nodded in understanding. "Do you think you've forgiven her?"

"I guess... I mean I still am a little unsure about her and don't trust her 100% but she really does regret what she did and I just want to think she has changed... I think you've made me soft", Piper chuckled.

"I think you're doing the right thing. She really seems like she has changed", Alex smiled.

"Yeah."

Alex played with Piper's hair as she tried to figure out how to start the conversation she knew they had to have.

"What are you thinking?" Piper asked, interrupting Alex's thoughts. She was currently curled up against Alex's side but lifted her head to look up at her.

Alex sighed. "I know you're probably already sick to this conversation but I really am worried about you..."

"Alex-"

"Just listen to me for a moment?"

Piper furrowed her eyebrows but nodded nevertheless.

"You keep saying that you're fine but I know you aren't. And it's fine to be not fine, Piper. I can see you can't sleep. I mean, have you gotten more sleep than 4-5 hours a night?"

Alex didn't let Piper answer before continuing. "I'm not saying that you need to talk with me but please, Piper, talk with someone. With my mom or with Cal. Hell, talk even with Polly if you feel like it, but you need to talk with someone. It pains me to know that you're trying to handle it on your own."

Silent tears left Piper's eyes as she listened to Alex speaking. She knew that Alex was right.

"I know that you're not used to talking about these things but you need to understand you have people around you that care about you. That doesn't mean you have to talk necessarily with them but that means you need to start taking care of yourself if you don't want them to be constantly worried", Alex tried to explain.

Piper was quiet for a while and Alex started to worry she had pushed her too far.

Piper cleared her throat as she started to fiddle with the hem of Alex's T-shirt. "They're about the accident... the nightmares, I mean. And the night when I got the panic attack, you were in that car. I couldn't do anything but watch when the car crashed..."

"Oh, Piper-"

"And suddenly I was running through the hospital corridors and Diane was there. She was crying and then there was this surgeon who looked apologetic and I just... It was just a nightmare but it felt so real..." Piper continued, ignoring what Alex was saying because if she didn't say this now she might not get herself to say it later. Her voice was shaky and tears kept running down on her face.

Alex stayed quiet and hugged Piper more tightly as she let the words sink in.

"I don't know what happened but now I just feel... It feels like every moment with you could be the last", Piper said as she buried her face into Alex's shoulder.

"Hey, hey. I'm not going anywhere. I promise", Alex tried to reassure her gently.

"But you don't know that. My parents weren't supposed to go anywhere either and look what happened anyway. This is exactly why I opted to stay unsocial because now when I have created this... this meaningful connection with you, I can't help but think always the worst."

"Okay listen there is a possibility that something would happen to me. But that possibility is fairly small. You're rational person, think about it. There's about 7.2 billion people in the world and there is what, about 1.3 million deaths caused by car accidents per year? It means that under a percent of the population dies in the car accidents. And especially as you've already lost people to the car accident it's highly unlikely that I get into a serious car accident."

Piper chuckled regardless of the serious conversation. "I like when you speak nerd to me."

"Sometimes I feel like nerd is the only language you understand", Alex smiled before turned serious again. "But yes, there's a possibility. Anyway, we can't do anything to really prevent the car accident or any other accident. So, thinking about it constantly is not going to anything else than make you paranoid and worried."

"I know", Piper sighed.

Alex looked at her girlfriend with soft eyes for a while before spoke again. "But I promise to be extra careful."

"Thank you", Piper smiled at her lovingly. She should've talked with Alex sooner. Piper regretted thinking that Alex would think her as a burden instead of helping her to see the right perspective. Of course, Alex would help. Because Alex just was like that. And that was one of the things Piper loved about her.

"You're welcome. Now, I have a question."

"Shoot."

"How common are your panic attacks?"

"They are uncommon", Piper answered, purposefully avoiding the question.

"I know that you're aware that people define 'uncommon' differently."

Piper groaned. "It really depends on the situation and my stress levels and my periods but the average is about one in a couple of months? For example, the last one was almost three months ago. I think that being with you has decreased some of my anxiety."

Alex smiled, she had known that she and her mom had helped Piper but she was happy to hear that there had been such a significant effect. Though she was still a bit worried about the panic attacks, she left the topic for now at least. "I'm really glad."

"Me too." Piper was quiet for a moment before opened her mouth again. "I- uhmm... never mind." Piper hadn't planned to say it. She almost said it but chickened out at the last moment. She couldn't bear the thought of Alex not saying it back.

"What is it? You can say it."

"Nothing. It's nothing."

Alex chuckled. "Okay then, weirdo."

Piper grinned as she changed her position and straddled Alex. When she was comfortably on Alex's lap, she kissed her passionately. "Thank you."

"For what?" Alex asked smiling widely.

"I don't know. Just being you, I guess."

"Well. You're welcome", Alex responded as she connected their lips again.

After a while of steamy make out session, Piper pulled back. "If we're not gonna stop, we're gonna end up having sex with Diane in an earshot. Again."

Alex laughed. "Okay, yeah. You're right. We should stop."

Piper gave one more kiss on Alex's lips before rolled off of her.

"Are you going to stay a night?"

"I think I'm going back to my place. See how it went with Polly and Target."

"Right", Alex nodded. "Are you coming to see Nicky and Lorna tomorrow?"

"Of course. I wouldn't miss it", Piper grinned.

"Hello? You here, Polly?" Piper called out as she entered her apartment.

"Yup, I'm here", came the answer, most likely from the couch.

"How did it go?" Piper quizzed as she entered the living room.

Polly shrugged. "The manager wasn't too happy with only getting an employer for two weeks but promised me the job with the minimum wage. I'll start tomorrow."

"What kind of days will you have?"

"Pretty basic, from eight till four. I work on Sundays, so I get a double wage but I have Saturdays off."

Piper nodded. "It isn't a dream job but it'll give you a start."

"Yeah..."

"I can't believe that your parents threw you out..."

"Me neither..."

"Look, I know this might sound harsh but... Think this as a way to start living your own life. I know your parents are like super controlling. This is your change to live your own life just like you want without them criticizing your every choice."

"I guess your right..."

Piper gave her a small smile before changing the subject. "So, what do you wanna eat today?"

On the next day Diane was making chicken soup and Alex was helping her to set the table as they heard the doorbell to ring.

"Finally", Alex uttered as she left the kitchen and went to open the door.

"What took you so long? You left like five hours ago", Alex teased immediately as she saw her best friend.

"Firstly, we left an hour ago and secondly, Lorna insisted to drive and she actually follows the speed limits, so..." Nicky laughed.

"Ah, that explains it all", Alex grinned before turned her gaze to Nicky's girlfriend. "It's so nice to meet you Lorna. Come inside."

"You too, Alex. I've heard much about you", Lorna greeted cheerily as she came inside with Nicky.

Alex chuckled as she closed the door and glanced at Nicky teasingly. "All the good things I hope?"

"Of course not, what did you think?"

Alex laughed. "Should have known."

"Is the blondie going to turn up at some point?" Nicky asked curiously. She would consider Piper as a friend now.

"Yeah, she promised to pay a visit at some point."

Nicky nodded but didn't have time to say anything else as Diane emerged from the kitchen with a wide smile. "I'm so happy to have you girls here!"

"And here, Lorna, is Diane. Since we know that my parents would only criticize you even if you were the fucking president, Diane here gets to do the judging", Nicky grinned.

"Don't take her seriously, I'm not judging anyone", Diane reassured Lorna laughing. "But I'm honored."

"I'm glad to meet you. I've heard much good about you", Lorna smiled as she offered her hand.

"Likewise", Diane smiled, ignoring the offered hand and pulled the girl into a hug.

When they pulled apart Diane went to hug Nicky too before informing that the food was ready.

"Thank god, I'm so hungry. Lorna refused to stop at the McDonald's", Nicky exclaimed as she went to the kitchen.

Lorna followed her with a pout. "Because I knew that the food was waiting for us here!"

"Nicky could eat two Big Macs and still be able to eat a full plate of food. I swear her stomach is endless", Alex quipped behind them.

"You're the one to talk! I've witnessed you eating ten meals a day. TEN MEALS."

"They were small servings!" Alex defended. "And if I eat one banana it isn't a meal, smartass!"

Diane just chuckled at their banter. "Let's eat. With or without endless stomachs."

All four of them were sitting in the living room after the dinner. They were getting to know Lorna better and just talking generally as they heard the doorbell ring.

"I thought Piper has a key?" Diane asked.

"She does. She just doesn't feel comfortable using it", Alex told her as she got up and went to open the door.

"Hey", she greeted Piper smiling as she had opened the door. Even though Piper had slept well the last night the restless nights before that were still evident in her eyes.

"Hi."

"You know if you just used your key, it would save me the trouble of getting up", Alex joked grinning.

"Well, I have to make sure you stay fit now when you don't play basketball anymore", Piper bantered right back.

"I knew you had to have some wicked plan", Alex laughed.

Piper looked at her smiling face adoringly, thinking that she would never get tired of that sight.

"Stop making out and come here!"

Alex took Piper's hand. "And that's how you know Nicky has arrived."

When the two of them appeared into the living room Nicky was immediately speaking. "Piper, heyyy. How has my favorite blonde been? Wow. You look like shit."

Lorna slapped Nicky's arm and Alex sent a warning look towards her best friend but Piper just raised her eyebrows amusedly. "And still manage to look better than you."

Nicky placed her hand onto her chest in mock hurt. "Damn. You're harsh today."

"Not more than any other day", Piper said with a slight smirk before her eyes found Lorna. "It's pleasure to meet you."

Lorna jumped up and went to hug Piper. "Nicky told me about and your visit in Hartford and I'm so glad you went there and I just wanted to thank you", she rambled, completely oblivious of the death stare Piper was giving at Nicky over her shoulder.

Nicky just grinned and blew a kiss towards her.

"It really isn't that big deal", Piper said as Lorna pulled back.

All four gave the same slightly judgmental look. She seriously was giving herself too little credit.

"If you're forming some kind of gang against me, I'm leaving", Piper said, only half joking.

"No. No gang. You can stay", Lorna rushed to say before took her place next to Nicky again.

Alex tapped the very narrow place between her and the armrest of the couch. Piper settled there comfortably, so her legs were on Alex's lap.

"I didn't fully believe that Alex had broken that shell of yours but I guess she did", Nicky commented as she watched them amusedly. "I'm glad she did though."

Piper glared at her half-heartedly. "Why are you focusing on me?"

"Just wanna make sure my favorite blonde is all right."

"Or you are just distracting me so I can't get a chance to ask Lorna how she has managed to put up with you", Piper quipped.

Alex laughed and Nicky glared at her jokingly. "Et Tu, Alex? Thought you wouldn't be that kind of friend who ditches me as soon as she gets a girlfriend."

"Me? I called you one time and you literally said that you can't talk because you're about to have sex. And then just ended the call. I could have needed you", Alex argued back playfully.

"Oh my god! You did that?!" Lorna exclaimed horrified as she turned to stare at Nicky.

"Well... Yeah? But only because you were like super hot and if Alex would have had something urgent to say she could have just called again. SO, you can't blame me for that," Nicky said as she pointed at Alex.

"Jeez, is there some kind of competition about 'who can make someone mad first' that I'm not aware of?" Diane said chuckling. She knew that the girls were only joking around but decided to put stop at this before it would get out of the hand.

"If we're about to have a competition I'm in!" Piper exclaimed like she would actually be excited about the idea. Which she probably was.

"What I am going to do with you?" Diane groaned as she threw her head back.

"Awww, I know you love us", Nicky grinned and they all laughed at that.

They spent the rest of the evening talking and watching TV until Piper went back to her place to interrogate how Polly's first day went.

The clock was already way past midnight and Nicky and Alex were the only ones up anymore as Lorna and Diane had gone to bed earlier.

"So, what's up with the blonde?" Nicky asked curiously.

Alex cleared her throat. "She's been having a bit of a hard time lately..."

"There's something bigger going on with her, isn't there? Not just a random fight between her and her parents?"

Alex flinched and thought for a while before answered. "Well, she doesn't have any parents to have fights with."

Nicky sat upright and looked at her with wide eyes. "Shit. I didn't... fuck, I didn't realize it was that bad..."

"Yeah. Just don't tell her that I told you. I just didn't want you to accidentally say something that would upset her", Alex asked with pleading eyes.

"Of course not", Nicky nodded as she examined Alex's face. "You really love her, don't you?"

Alex nodded sighing. "I really do."

Nicky smiled at her. "Look at us now. We've both come a long way from just sleeping with a bunch of people."

"I'm glad you met Lorna. I think she's exactly what you need, something stable in your life", Alex smiled. "I'm really happy for you."

"I think it's kind of the same situation with Piper. You're the stability she needs in her life. Are you happy with her?"

Alex nodded, an involuntary smile spreading on her face. "Yeah. Like so fucking happy."

"Me too."

The two best friends looked at each other smiling before Nicky got up. "Jesus, when did we come this sappy? I'm going to bed before this is going to become a habit", she yawned as she turned around to walk upstairs.

Alex chuckled and followed her. "Or you're just tired. Can't hang out with the big kids anymore?"

Nicky just flipped her off and that got Alex to laugh even more. "Remember, no sex in our sheets!"

"Please. I bet you and Piper have had fun in those sheets too", Nicky grinned and turned around just in time to see Alex's sheepish look.

"Knew it!"

Alex huffed as she turned towards her own room. "Night, Nicky."

"Night, Vause. Don't have too dirty dreams about your girlfriend now when she isn't here to make them true", Nicky grinned before quickly hiding in the guestroom from either the quip she knew Alex has ready to throw at her or then an actual object that would be thrown towards her. Or knowing Alex, it could have been both.

Thanks for reading! Like always, please review and tell me what you thought. It keeps me motivated :P I feel like that there's going to be only one more chapter... Well, let's see how things go. Thank you for all the positive feedback! Love you.

-Iina