More than anything I am overwhelmed by the number of different species, races and creatures that were spread across the huge fields and plains in front of the city. I could see the burning of parts of the city and desperately prayed that the innocent women, children and men were safe and protected by Gandalf and the soldiers that were not fighting or dying on the fields.
Panic rose in my chest so quickly that for a second I lost sight of what I was doing, who I was, what I was fighting for. For a split second everything around me stilled, everything was silent and I gazed around wildly aware that my horse was galloping beneath me but unable to hear anything above the pounding of my own heartbeat. Then just as suddenly as it had started the silence and stillness is over and the clashing of metal on metal, flesh against flesh sets my teeth on edge. Taking a deep breath I throw myself into battle before I am able to talk myself out of it and barely pause to breathe as I fend off attack after attack.
It cannot have been more than two hours but I am exhausted, I am covered in the blood of my enemies and it has mixed with my own from the nicks I have received. I lost sight of Eowyn and Merry some minutes ago and am trying desperately to concentrate on my own battle and not to become distracted with looking for them but it is difficult.
"Peyson," the shout is panicked and causes my own heart beat to speed up as I spin breathing a sigh of relief as I see Ewoyn and Merry riding up beside me both looking terrified but unharmed.
"Look," Merry shouts and I turn my head in the direction he is pointing and gasp out loud as I see the huge creatures hurtling towards us. They are the biggest things I have ever seen, great legs as thick as tree trunks holding up a body the is bigger than a ship and so thick and heavy that it could surely break through any barrier. Their heads complete with huge sets of tusks which had been adorned with deadly wires designed to wipe out as many of our horses and men as possible. My blood runs cold as I see atop their backs basket type contraptions housing men armed with deadly bows.
"Re form the line," the command comes and I obey, with Haldir beside me and Eowyn and Merry on my other side.
"I wished all my life for this chance and now I do not know if I am ready," Eowyn says to me quietly and I glance at her before setting my gaze ahead.
"You have survived this far and we will survive the rest together, Aragron will be here soon we will win this fight," I say somehow managing to inject a conviction and confidence I'm not entirely sure I feel into my voice and I am glad of it as I see their own resolves harden a little.
"Charge," the cry is deafening even over the sound of battle around us the cry to charge seems to echo in my own ears as I find myself screaming out in response and kicking my horse into action. It seems like seconds later that I have lost sight of the others and a force so strong it vibrates through me as it throws both me and my horse to the ground. Grunting I try desperately to fill my lungs with the air that has just been knocked out of them.
"Female," something snarls behind me and on instinct I roll to the side and thrust upwards with my sword managing to impale the orc on it and I relish the slight look of shock on it's face as I kill it before I push it off and pull myself to my feet. Gazing around I realise that my poor horse would not be getting up again and feel a sudden pain in my chest for all those innocent beings that now lay slaughtered on these battle fields but before I can spend too long thinking on it I am thrown back into battle.
On the ground I am forced to engage in hand to hand combat more than I had wanted to and I am already feeling the pain in my back as the fighting pulls on my wound. I am tiring quickly and beginning to lose hope of this ever being over, I had thought that watching wave after wave of orc attack Helm's Deep had felt desperate and futile but it had been nothing compared to this. I longed for Aragorn's face to appear before me and for some salvation to arrive but I felt as if it never would.
"That still only counts as one," wait a minute, that voice. I know that voice. I spin wildly looking for Gimli hope blooming in me with every heartbeat.
"Gimli," I shout the word dying on my lips as something heavy hits me and blackness descends upon me quickly as the ground flies up to meet my face.
As thoughts begin to seep back into my mind and the power of my limbs seems to return also I roll onto my side slightly trying not to hiss as the pain in my back, the wound was on the verge of splitting again if it had not already I was sure of it. I manage to somehow get to my knees and I sit for a while trying to stop the earth from spinning beneath me, my hand reaching up to touch the wet blood on the side of my face and head. It seems that an enemy had thought that blow was enough to kill me, I have been lucky so far this fight, I do not seem to be injured anywhere else and after a second of searching I locate my sword and pull myself to my feet. It is only as I do this and begin to stumble around that I realise there is a hush over the fields. The battle is over and I had no idea if I was the only one who survived or not. A sudden rush of fear engulfs me as I imagine a world where I was alone again at the mercy of Sauron who seemed to constantly be in my head since the incident back at Edoras.
"Peyson," I am startled out of my panic at the sound of the voice and look around to see Pippin rushing towards me and I collapse to my knees as I embrace him trying to soothe his anguish as he sobs into my tunic despite the desperate need to ask who has been injured or killed for there could be no other reason for such grief.
"What is wrong my friend?" I ask in a whisper and after a while he pulls away enough to look up at me,
"It's Merry, he's hurt Peyson I think he might be dying and Lady Eowyn too they have been taken to the houses of healing," he replies in a broken voice and his eyes are so full of pain that my heart breaks.
"Then we must go and be with them so they can see us when they wake up," I say trying to be strong for him although guilt and fear filled me as I stood and took his hand in mine.
"You truly think they will be okay? Aragorn looked so worried," he says and I almost stop breathing at the sound of his name, he is here then and he is okay. I sped up a little although my steps were still faltering my breath almost a wheeze as we make our way through the city.
"This way," a woman directs us and we follow quietly and obediently until we find ourselves in the doorway to the healing houses. Pippin suddenly pulls away from my grasp and darts towards a pallet on which I can see the tiny form of Merry lying and I am about to step in and follow him when I see him. My whole world stops for a second so great is the relief that I feel knowing that he is safe and alive. His brow is furrowed as he is bent over the body of Eowyn attempting to heal her but he looks relatively unharmed and for that I instantly send a thank you to the Valar and it is in this moment that he glances up as he finishes with Eowyn and catches my eye. His mouth opens slightly and his entire body shifts the tiniest amount, from the outside, for an onlooker it may not look like much but if you could see his eyes, you would see the joy and love and relief in them as I do and I feel like I breathe the first true breath since he left and Valar did it hurt. I sit suddenly slumping against the wall and hissing slightly in pain as I do so and he is beside me in a second.
"Little one?" his voice is tight, too tight like he is exhausted and worried, and doesn't know what to do and I feel my heart break a little more than it already had done at the thought of him being so troubled.
"I am well, just tired and relieved," I say looking up at him and offering him a small smile, "Go do what you do best," I add and he lets his hand linger over mine for a second longer and I shiver at the feel of his body so close to mine despite the fact that we cannot touch, or kiss or do anything especially here, and then he is gone and I sit still watching the blur of people wash past me.
"Peyson," I wake with a start at the sound of my name and rub my eyes as I gaze around blearily before focusing on Legolas' face in front of mine.
"You're safe," I breathe feeling more relieved than I can say as I see the evidence of what I had thought. I had known that he was safe, I would have seen it in Aragorn's face were it otherwise but to see him in front of me confirming it was the proof that had me finally relax a little.
"I am well my friend," he smiles, "but we must be somewhere, there is a meeting being held and Aragorn has requested your presence," he says and holds out a hand to me. I take it and pull myself up wincing at the pain in my back. "You are wounded?" he asks looking concerned and I shake my head quickly.
"I am fine, just tired and sore from a long day of fighting," I reply quickly and after a second longer he nods his head and we move off, navigating our way through the network of corridors until we eventually reach the throne room from which I can already hear voices.
"Legolas, Peyson we were just discussing the idea of a nice ride to Mordor," Gandalf says as we enter and I stop and stare at him as if he is completely crazy and assume that Legolas is doing the same until he shifts beside me and heads further into the room.
"A diversion, for Frodo," he says slowly and Gandalf nods as I feel a small smile spread across my face, finally I can do something to help Frodo, really help him.
"I'm in I say immediately and feel the slight stiffening in Aragorn's posture as I do so but I decide to ignore it for now, I'll tackle him later.