A/N: Depictions of a panic attack in this chapter, plus some mild sexual content. If panic attacks trigger you, stop reading at "What about the drowning", and then control + F to start reading at "weight distribution".

Kageyama's POV

He was getting cabin fever. It had been a week since the attack, and he had yet to leave the confines of Hinata's apartment. Sure, he was forever grateful, and in the smaller man's debt… but damn if he didn't get outside soon he was going to blow a gasket. His mood had been slowly deteriorating over the past couple days, and he'd noticed how Hinata was extra careful around him, as if he could sense the tension radiating off the injured man.

"Alright, that's it." He finally grumbled, staring grumpily at the redhead who was reading his textbook in the corner of the room. "We're going outside."

Hinata raised his head and blinked at him. "You nearly passed out walking to the bathroom three days ago." His voice was even, and matter-of-fact.

Kageyama sat in silence for a moment, "Worth the risk." Was his final judgement. He had been sitting on top of the blankets, propped up against the small mountain of pillows; and now he was using that fluffy mound to force himself off the ground. He groaned loudly while he did so, feeling his stomach burning in pain with the strain. He wouldn't give up though.

Hinata was suddenly at his side, ducking his head under the man's arm and assisting his standing process, "Bakayama, you're going to tear your stitching, and Yachi-san will kill us both!" He scolded, shaking his head. Kageyama righted himself, allowing the smaller man to support him. Anything to get out of this room.

They took it slowly, easing the injured man into shoes, and out the entry way. Hinata locked up behind them and acted as a support. A thought came to the tall man, pointing out what should have been obvious from the get go- "This would be easier with crutches."

"We can pick some up? Though, you can only use one with your arm like that." Hinata nodded towards the splint that secured his wrist in place, a sling that Yachi had brought back from school was holding the arm across his chest. Kageyama nodded in simple agreement.

When they got outside, Kageyama couldn't help the sigh of relief that escaped him. He inhaled the early autumn air deeply, though instantly regretted it. His broken rib pained him greatly, and he ended up coughing. He felt the hand Hinata had thrown around him for support softly rubbing circles on his back while he coughed, and he felt his face heat up. If Hinata had noticed his flush, the smaller man didn't mention it. Instead, Hinata began leading him slowly down the sidewalk, towards the taller, newer looking buildings.

The pair walked in silence most of the way, Hinata being a steady support, and Kageyama enjoying this taste of sudden freedom he'd been longing for. He wanted desperately to go home, but he wasn't quite well enough to head back into danger just yet- god only knew what might be waiting for him back there, and he was in no shape to defend himself. At least he was back in his own clothing again, Hinata had gone back to Black Dahlia the day before and picked up some of his belongings, thanks to Nishinoya-san. That little bit of familiarity was enough to calm him some- besides, none of Hinata's clothing fit him.

Hinata had been leading the pair to a pharmacy. "Here, rest for a bit while I go in- is there anything you want? There is a convenience store attached." He lead Kageyama to a bench in front of the shop, and helped him sit. The taller man pondered for a moment, and then agreed to canned coffee.

He sat, watching the redhead disappear inside the glass door. The sun reflected his own image back at him; dark circles under deep blue eyes, hair dishevelled, arm bound to his chest in a sling, and generally looking like hell. At least his head wasn't wrapped up anymore. He looked like less of a train wreck without the bandage peaking through his hair, but just barely.

It didn't take Hinata long to exit the store, carrying a bag, and one crutch. "They sell singles?"

"Yeah! So handy!" Hinata approached, and set the crutch down next to Kageyama. He took a seat on the other side of the man and handed over the canned coffee before opening his own.

"Thanks" Kageyama mumbled, struggling to open the can with one hand. Hinata made a little 'oh!' sound before turning and opening the can for him. The taller boy nodded his thanks again before taking a drink.

They sat in silence for a while, watching the world go by before Hinata finally spoke, "I told myself when I found you that I didn't need any answers, but it's been eating me up inside."

Kageyama blinked at him over his coffee and scowled. He sighed heavily and shook his head. "I can't promise you answers." Hinata nodded at this, looking down at his feet. Kageyama was surprised at this acceptance, expecting the redhead to push harder. He noticed Hinata's hands fidgeting on the can, realising that he hadn't really accepted the answer, he was just trying to contain his curiosity. With a deep sigh he finished his coffee and handed the can over to the other boy, before taking the crutch under one arm and standing. It definitely helped, but the process was still uncomfortable, and borderline painful. "Come on, we'll talk while we walk."

Hinata nearly shot out of his seat as if the bench was suddenly lava. Quickly he finished his own coffee and recycled both cans before falling into slow step with his companion.

"Ask, I'll answer what I can."

Hinata walked in silence, pondering his question with the entirety of his attention. Kageyama had to stop him from walking into a lamp post twice along the way.

"Black Dahlia. What's the deal with that?"

"What do you mean?"

Hinata bit his bottom lip and rubbed the back of his head, "Well, I mean… some of them looked rather thuggish, and it's not exactly in a safe part of town… Are they… you know?"

"Affiliated?" Kageyama interjected, getting irritated at Hinata beating around the bush, "Yes and no. The owner Ukai, and his son are part of Sumiyoshi-kai… it's a branch of the Yakuza, and a big one at that. A few others at the lounge are considered Ukai's Kubon… but I've never shared sake. Most of us are just employees, but that isn't to say we are completely uninvolved." He trudged along slowly, his wounds feeling uncomfortable. Between him talking and Hinata's pondering, they'd been walking for about ten minutes.

They rounded a corner to an empty park, and Kageyama made his way to a spot of grass under the shade of a tree. He all but collapsed into the greenery with relief.

"You look tired, perhaps we should-" Hinata began.

"A little longer, just let me rest for a few minutes." Kageyama sighed, laying back on the grass and closing his eyes.

"Alright…" Silence fell between them once again, though it didn't last for long, "So how does that work? You not being affiliated but working for the Yakuza."

"There's a lot I can't talk about- but, really I'm just like any other employee," at first Kageyama was going to leave it at that, "Well, maybe not like any other employee- you see, I, uh… I was a street kid. Hell, most of us were." He could feel Hinata staring at him, and it made his face feel hot with embarrassment or shame, he wasn't sure which. "Ukai-sama… found me stealing a few years back, along with some of his Yakuza brothers. The others started beating me up, probably would have killed me had Ukai not stepped in and taken responsibility for me. He fed me, clothed me, and put me to work in his lounge as a dishwasher. That's where I met everyone, back before it was the Dahlia. It was just some grungy gang hideout kitchen at the time."

He twirled some grass between his fingers before continuing, " I was sixteen then, practically feral. The other kids had been picked up by him and his foster-father over the years, they raised us all, taught us to read and count, then put us to work. It was a system that was beneficial for everyone. Eventually some joined up, the rest just moved on when their time came, or stayed with Ukai-sama, as I did. He's the only father figure I've ever known."

Hinata was uncharacteristically silent. Kageyama opened his eyes and looked over at the man. He was sitting upright with his legs crossed, arms outstretched behind him to carry his weight. He looked relaxed, but his face was furrowed in a scowl.

"Those guys back there, they're my friends, the closest thing I've ever had to a family. We'd die for each other given the chance- which is a distinct possibility." This got Hinata's attention. His large eyes snapped down to stare at Kageyama, his face still screwed into a scowl.

"Why? Why do you put yourself in danger?"

"Why do you work too many jobs and exhaust yourself?"

"Because Nats-"

"Exactly," Kageyama cut in, "Your family needs you. I've got people at Dahlia who can't keep their nose out of trouble for more than a few days at a time, and we've got our own troubles we can't exactly run away from. We put ourselves in danger for each other. So we can all wake up another day together."

There were unshed tears in Hinata's eyes as he spoke, "Damn, I didn't know you were the poetic type."

The pair sat in silence for a moment before chuckling, "Yeah, I kind of surprised myself there too." He could feel his perpetual scowl melt away into a relaxed grin.

Hinata stared at him, and whispered, "That's nice."

Blue eyes blinked, "W-what is?"

Flushing, Hinata looked back at the sky, avoiding eye contact, "Your smile, it's the first time I've seen it."

"One in a million chance, consider yourself lucky." Kageyama attempted humor to shed off the feeling of embarrassment that was creeping up his spine.

They sat for a bit longer before Hinata helped the taller boy off the ground, and they set off towards the apartment.

That night after the ritual sponge bath (which was still embarrassing despite it being a daily event), Hinata sat next to him on the futon and redressed his wounds. The bruising had lessened in the last week, and the stitches were more itchy than sensitive now.

"So how did it happen?" Hinata let his fingers brush feather light over the skin next to the stab wound. Kageyama felt a cold chill run over his exposed flesh, making the hairs on his arms stand on end.

"I was out with Nishinoya-san," Hinata had figured as much based on his brief meeting with the short employee, "We were kicking around a hacky-sack he'd picked up in a small park by the river, and drinking beer. Night time, quiet, nobody around."

Hinata gently applied ointment to the stitching, pausing when Kageyama inhaled in discomfort, before continuing.

"Not much of a problem since neither of us are affiliated, but tensions have been rising between families, and non-Yakuza gangs. A group of guys, maybe six or seven came rolling up with some girls… most of them were drunk or high I think." Kageyama watched Hinata work, his voice was even, and slightly sluggish from sleep- the sponge bath always made him this way. Despite the embarrassment, it did feel pretty damn good. Soaking in relaxation afterglow, he continued; "They didn't like us being on their turf, Noya-san and I decided it wasn't worth our trouble, so we grabbed our cans and started to leave. We'd gotten out of the park and were about to round the corner when one of the guys started hassling a girl. She was clearly not enjoying the advances and was being rather vocal about it."

Hinata continued his work making sure not to interrupt the strangely talkative man. Perhaps he needed to get this off his chest. He'd been talking more today than he had in the past week they'd been staying together.

"Noya-san decided to be a white knight after one of the guys slugged the girl… sure I wanted to help but we were seriously outnumbered. Noya went running in, and I quickly called Daichi-san and let him know where we were and that we were in trouble, then I followed the idiot into the fray. By the time I got involved Noya had taken one guy down and most of the women had run off. That just made the brutes more angry. We fought, and got our asses handed to us- as to be expected. I think I at least hospitalised a few." He sounded almost proud of that; "I didn't see the last guy pull the knife though. He ran up with it concealed in his jacket, I felt it… but one of the other guys had grabbed something from the ground and bashed my head. I remember having a vague idea that I was bleeding, I could hear Noya screaming, and then other voices approaching- probably Daichi and the rest… I'll have to ask when I see them." He rubbed his head with his uninjured hand, thinking; "Everything after the blow to the head is kinda fuzzy. I must have stumbled near the water, and either fell into the river, or got pushed in. Not sure."

Kageyama stayed silent after that, looking down at his hands while Hinata bandaged his wounds.

"Th-that sounds terrifying." The redhead finally spoke, sitting back to put away the medical equipment.

"It certainly wasn't fun, but I've always been a scrappy kid. First time for getting stabbed through." Kageyama was so nonchalant about the ordeal, Hinata simply blinked at him.

"W-what about the drowning? You didn't have a nightmare last night I don't think…"

Kageyama hesitated, and chewed on his bottom lip, "The thought of being completely enveloped in water makes my lungs feel like they're filling, and like iron weights are attached to my legs…" His hands were shaking, and his chest felt tight even thinking about it. "I can't remember if I dream ab-" his breath caught in his chest and his eyes went wide. Why couldn't he breathe? His body was tense and his muscles felt like they were on fire.

"K-kageyama? Kageyama!" Hinata was at his side again, gripping his shoulders, "Take a deep breath-"

The taller boy gasped as if his life depended on it, his hands both grasped onto Hinata's wrists as he heaved, hyperventilating. He ignored the splitting pain in his injured wrist, focused entirely on the feeling of being out of water and still feeling like he was drowning.

Suddenly the redhead was wrapping his arms around him, his arm pulling free of Kageyama's injured and weak grip to snake around behind him and rub circles on his back. Kageyama was tense like a wire, shaking in the embrace. "In through your nose- out through your mouth, fill your lungs completely." Hinata's voice had a quiver to it, but he spoke calmly. His other hand he managed to wrestle free, wrapping it around the panicked boy to hold the back of his head. He made calming shushing sounds, slowly rocking the man.

Kageyama felt tears running down his cheeks, but he was focused now on Hinata's words. He forced a ragged breath in… held it for a moment, and slowly let it escape. His body began to sag in Hinata's arms, so the smaller boy began to adjust to the new weight distribution. Hinata sat back, and pulled on Kageyama to follow. "S-sorry, you're too heavy for me to kneel like that."

Kageyama didn't respond, he just kept trying to breathe, assisting with the movement as best he could. The goal was to get Kageyama in his lap- or so the taller boy assumed, but with their mismatched body sizes and weight, Hinata was pushed backwards further, until he was laying down with Kageyama resting his head on his chest. It… was actually very comforting, having the smaller boy rubbing his back and gently playing with his hair. Kageyama ignored the fact that they were essentially cuddling, and focused on stopping the panic attack. He closed his eyes and listened to the pounding sound beneath his ear, the soothing thrum of life beneath him.

Hinata's fingers were soft with their touches, his heart slowly calming down from the initial pounding. "S-sorry- I didn't mean to cause…" His voice broke at that, his soothing strokes hesitating for a moment before continuing. Kageyama slowly nodded against his chest, his tears staining the shirt beneath him.

"Mmhm, 's'okay," He mumbled, not opening his eyes. "S'rry for crushing you." His voice was raspy with fatigue, every ounce of energy had escaped him in the attack. Despite being calmed down, he still felt a pit of fear gnawing at his insides.

"N-no! It's alright, stay where you are as long as you want. I don't mind." The redhead exclaimed, sounding somewhat nervous.

A few minutes later, with Hinata still playing with his hair and rubbing circles across his shoulder blades, the smaller man shifted. Panic rose in Kageyama suddenly, as if the flotation device he'd been depending on was suddenly getting away from him. He wrapped his arms around the boy, taking care not to hurt his arm any more, his legs taking one of Hinata's hostage. Blue eyes opened to see Hinata reaching for a pillow with the hand that had been entangled in his hair. He pulled the pillow to him by the corner and stuffed it under the back of his head. The sky had grown darker in just the last thirty-minutes of his attack, the only light in the room coming from the dim lamp in the far corner. "Sorry, just needed this…" He explained, patting the pillow behind his head. His hand returned to the raven's hair, and slowly but surely Kageyama drifted off to sleep.

He was warm. Uncharacteristically so for mid October. He slowly opened his eyes, only to be greeted with the side of someone's neck. He paused for a moment, waiting for the world to come into focus, and began to survey his surroundings. He was half laying on top of Hinata, with his face nuzzled into the side of the smaller man's neck. He vaguely recalled getting into a similar position during the night when he'd had his panic attack, and based off of that knowledge he was able to deduce that in his sleep he'd managed to shimmy up the side of the smaller man to move his face from on top of his chest. During the process, he'd pulled Hinata's shirt with him, his hand pressed against naked flesh… under his shirt. He stared down at his forearm, which disappeared under the fabric near his wrist. He lay there completely frozen, staring at their bodies moulded together. Something in his lower stomach suddenly ached- which was not his stab wound, he noticed-, and he felt his face heat up with burning embarrassment as another part of his body decided to wake up once he was greeted with the naked flesh of Hinata's abdomen.

Hinata stirred under him, mumbling something in his sleep. Kageyama prayed he wouldn't wake up, his eyes flicking to the small digital clock next to the lamp which was for some reason off. Perhaps Natsu had come in to switch it off… then Natsu had seen them like this. How embarrassing, Kageyama internally groaned. His body reacted again to Hinata moving around in his sleep. He cursed his weak self control, and decided it would be best to move, whether it hurt or not.

It was only four in the morning, hopefully that meant Hinata would be in a deep enough sleep not to be woken by Kageyama's movement. The raven haired man shifted, using what little strength he had in his state, and rolled off of the redhead, onto his back.

He didn't realise that while he'd been holding onto Hinata, Hinata had also been holding onto him, his arm that had been under Kageyama was laced and tangled through the taller man's arm and was stuck. Kageyama's movement must have hurt Hinata enough to cause the smaller man to groan. The sound went directly into Kageyama's crotch. Dammit, how was he going to take care of this?

Hinata shifted further in his sleep, rolling one way to try to get comfortable, before rolling back towards Kageyama. In the end, they ended up in reversed positions, with Hinata half on top of Kageyama, and Kageyama laying on his back trying his hardest to mentally force away the growing problem in his shorts.

Hinata whimpered slightly in his sleep, drawing some curiosity from the raven-haired. He nuzzled his face against Kageyama's chest, his arm tightening across Kageyama's bare torso. This was not helping! Dammit, Dammit! Kageyama internally screamed. Hinata's own shirt was still pulled up, nearly to his armpits, a pink nipple was exposed to the air. Kageyama pinched his eyes closed and pushed the back of his sore head against the floor, seeing as he didn't have a pillow beneath him. He'd thought about men before, but he'd never actually done anything with one, yet all he could think about right then was how soft Hinata's skin was, how pink his nipple had been, puckered to the sudden exposure of air.

"K-kageyama…" Blue eyes shot open as he looked down at the smaller man. It had been all but a whisper, if not a whimper. A deep sigh escaped the small body, as he pressed his form against the injured man.

Kageyama sighed and shut his eyes again, "Fuck."

He didn't sleep any more that night.

A/N: Hmmm I wonder what Hinata was dreaming about?

Sorry about the fluff with lack of action - I wanted to embarrass poor Kags.

Next we'll be getting into some of the nitty-gritty of the underworld- so be prepared for some violence (evil cackle)