Aaand here we go with another chapter. Don't hate me...all will eventually be resolved...in due time.

Stoick stood on the docks, remembering the events that had unfolded only a few hours ago. The boards were still burnt and destroyed where Hiccup managed to fight off his captors with one final blast, sending both the dragons far enough away. Hiccup saved his mate, and himself, but Stoick knew that when his child awoke, he would have contempt towards Berk and it's leader. The old chief sighed inwards and turned away from the ocean, heading back towards the Great Hall.

"I let them escape with two innocent boys," Stoick said aloud, as if he were talking to someone right next to him, "I need to own up to what I did and get them back. I need to own up to my mistakes and quit being the Stoick that used to exist. I can't be that Stoick again. I can't let myself become the same Stoick who disowned Hiccup, who nearly killed Toothless, who made foolish and reckless decisions. I tried once before to change and I failed. Not anymore. I can't. This isn't an option. I have to change."

Several villagers stared at their chief as he walked towards the Great Hall, talking to himself and to the world around him. They felt uneasy, yet at rest. They had faith in their leader, they had faith in Stoick. They know more than Stoick how much he had changed. He was far from the same man that long year ago. He had a stronger will, stronger morals, stronger mind, stronger love. He had become more powerful than he had ever been before. His mind was clearer, and he let his heart guide him rather than his instincts. He relied on his mind and those around him. Most importantly, they knew he had a greater grasp of what was at stake every day. He had so much more worth fighting for.

"Today is the day when everything changes."

The first sensation Hiccup felt when he was woken from his deep sleep was an uneasy feeling. The slight movements of his body were rewarded with slight stings and aches that sent shivers through his being. It seemed like every inch of his dragon body had some injury, whether it be a small scratch, bad bruise, or just plain in pain. Hiccup felt mildly unhappy with himself, realizing that even with better healing capabilities, this body still had its limits. Hiccup slowly moved his head around, getting used to the sensations pulsating in and around his neck and head. It wasn't so unpleasant as it was annoying. Anther hindrance to be added on top of the unfortunate situations he found himself and Toothless in countless times.

It took a few moments for his eyes to adjust before Hiccup realized he was in his old room. A dim candle was the only source of light that flickered around the room. The room hadn't been used in so long, yet seemed to be exactly the way he left it. His bed was still a mess, pillows upturned and tossed around, sheets and blankets thrown about, random claw marks and singes around the bedding thanks to nightmares. His book shelf was barely filled with anything besides old books his father had kept there. Hiccup remembered how his father would always glance at the books, keeping his gaze there for a short while before he looked away. He would always whisper how much he missed her. How much he longed to hear her voice reading out those words once again.

Only the dragon and his thoughts were present in the otherwise vacant and bare room. Anything of value had been in Hiccup's home before it was lost, all consumed by the fire that plagued the village not too long ago. It still stained the minds of the Berk inhabitants, but no matter how much they wished it was a harsh nightmare, reality always brought them back into its harsh and cruel grasp.

Hiccup felt so impressionable, as if his surroundings were slowly becoming him. Any bit of emotion, any bit of personality could be reflected onto him, even if it was totally opposite of who he was. He was grieving, and angry and wanted to escape who he once was. He didn't want to feel weak. He was scared that his mind would pull him into a fantasy where he would become a jaded dragon who just wanted to kill those who did him harm. Even worse, he was scared that fantasy, would become reality in some way.

Hiccup tried to pull himself up off the cot he was laying on when his legs gave out under him. The dragon felt weak and numb throughout his lower body as if he'd been dunked into freezing waters. He fell back onto the cot with a soft thud and let out a short cry of surprise. Hiccup sat there for a few moments, staring at his own legs and realizing how weak he felt. He knew all he'd been through, but he thought, no, he wished he was stronger than that.

Staring at his legs, Hiccup noticed a small sack next to his cot. Swiping it closer with his tail, Hiccup picked it up and slowly undid the strings keeping the contents from spilling out. The dragon peered inside and saw books and papers neatly strung together. Hiccup turned the bag upside down and let the contents fall into his paw, grabbing them as firmly as he could. Laying them down, he realized what these were. They were the books he'd left on the hill that night when the flames ravaged his once beautiful home.

"How?" Hiccup thought with astonishment and curiosity. Footsteps attracted Hiccup's attention as they made their way up the stairs. They stopped for a moment, as if hesitating on whether or not to enter or leave. Whoever it was chose the first option as they slowly pushed open the door with a loud and slightly sickening creak.

"Hiccup?" A soft voice called out. Hiccup immediately recognized it as Astrid. The young viking slowly pushed the door open more, peering into the room as if she was a shy little girl. Hiccup blinked almost blankly at her before he let out a somewhat monotone reply.

"Hello," the dragon said, almost unaware that he was talking, "How is Toothless?" Astrid stepped into the room more, closing the door behind her.

"He's okay, resting over with Svelta. You've been out for a good twelve hours," Astrid said softly and quickly as if to avoid much conversation. The viking girl messed with her shirt before she walked closer to the dragon, sitting on the bed near him. Hiccup could see that she was fiddling with her thumbs as if she was nervous.

"Is everything okay Astrid?" Hiccup asked, finally able to bring back some emotion into his voice. Astrid glanced over at him and nodded her head quickly. The viking got up quickly and went over to him. Hiccup felt a bit confused as the girl bent down and stared into his eyes. He could see sadness, anger, frustration, and so many more emotions as swimming in her eyes. Slowly but surely, Astrid moved in closer and brought her arms around the dragon softly, hugging him gently.

"I know Hiccup, I know what they did to you," Astrid whispered softly as if it was an ultimately taboo to ever mutter those words. Hiccup understood what she mean't, but honestly, he really wished and hoped he didn't. He hoped she was talking about something completely different.

"They tortured me," Hiccup said, "I've taken a beating before and I'll continue to do it." Astrid let her hug slowly loosen as she pulled back to look into the dragon's eyes. She shook her head with this face that struck into Hiccup's core. The way her eyes became sullen and lifeless. The way her face suddenly seemed so pale and ghostly. The way the few tears rolled down her face seemed so icy and rigid with anguish.

"I helped Svelta take care of you Hiccup. She's seen it before. She says it happens to prisoners of war often. She told me to keep quite. Hiccup I'm so sorry," Astrid said, holding back tears, "I should've been there, Berk should've been there for you two, but we waited and waited and it happened and I-" Hiccup raised a paw up to the girls mouth, not wanting her to speak anymore. He didn't want anymore grief in his life. He knew she mean't well, but right now, all he wanted to do was feel normal again, see Toothless, and get stronger. He had to get stronger so he wouldn't get hurt, so the people around him wouldn't get hurt, so he could stop all the horrid people in the world. He felt so weak. He didn't want to be weak. He didn't want to be this Hiccup anymore, he wanted to change who he was, yet he was scared of losing all of what he was. He wanted to be someone else, he needed a personality to adopt.

"I know," Hiccup said, "It's our fault really." Astrid looked at Hiccup with cold surprise. She hit him hard, eliciting a loud cry from him as she punched a heavily bruised area. She stared at him, her cold sadness turning to cold anger. Cold anger. It made Hiccup feel a little different inside. That pain made him angrier. That pain made him want to hunt them down.

"Cold...hard...detached...I could kill them like that...the Hiccup I know wouldn't have to bear that burden...that kid wouldn't be able to take the guilt," the dragon thought to himself.

"Don't you ever say it was your fault," She said softly. She looked at him for a few moments then hugged him again, whispering another apology into his ear. Pulling away, the viking made herself comfortable in front of the dragon and looked at him with expecting eyes.

"Tell me everything," Astrid said softly, "You need to tell me everything. We need the information, and I want to help you Hiccup." The dragon stared at the girl and processed the information slowly. He understand what was needed from him, and he understood Astrid's intentions. In order to grow, he had to first get passed the obstacles and the emotions that kept him stunted. He nodded.

"I woke up in a cell, alone and chained to the ground. I don't know how long I was in there alone, only barely getting food. It was always just enough to keep me alive. I was always being guarded and kept an eye on, but I never did anything. There was nothing I could do. All I had was one window high up off the ground that gave me a little light and just enough hope to keep me moving forward. I didn't give up, but I came close many, many times. There was one kind guard that always gave me more food and water, taking care of me. He or she always gave me just a little more hope. Then, Alvin came into my cell and questioned me. He used everyone against me, saying he had you two and that he would kill every one of you guys if I didn't talk. I thought they killed Johan's dragon before...I thought they killed a few of you guys. I couldn't take the risk so I answered whatever question they had. They never asked about Berk and its defenses, nothing useful that would benefit them during a battle or invasion. All they asked about was Ryuu and that boy. I don't know why they wanted them, but they have them now. I saw them get dragged off right in front of my eyes. I watched as Berk traded their souls for ours. How could dad do that Astrid? How could he even think about doing it? I know he didn't, but that fact is, because of us, because of his moments of weakness, two innocent kids are in Outcast hands! Astrid, we-," Hiccup softly confessed, cutting himself off. He knew venting wasn't the right course of action at the moment, and there was always going to be time for him to do that alone. He didn't want to burden anyone, but with each passing word, it was like weights were being lifted off Hiccup's shoulders. Astrid only watched, occasionally nodding as she received the information, offering an brief moment of weakness before returning to her cold state. Hiccup sighed softly before returning to his words.

"After I told him what he wanted, he left. I did hear him say that Ryuu and Tatsuo would destroy the village. I don't know why he would say that or why he would think that. I don't know why they would. They have no reason. Tatsuo lost his father, Ryuu lost his family. Berk seems like the only place for them now. Why would anyone want to destroy their home? Why would Alvin? Why would any sane person?" Astrid held up a hand and silenced the dragon quickly.

"Hiccup, stay on topic," she said softly. Even though she kept a cold appearance, Hiccup could see in her eyes those feelings of anger and vengeance as they cascaded through her eyes. Hiccup stared at her for a moment and then nodded softly, returning to his story.

"Then after a while, I heard forces outside again. It was the one kind guard and Toothless. I didn't quite believe it at first, then the door was unlocked and...and there he was. My dragon in shining scales. He came over and undid my chains and we quickly followed the guard. We got outside when alarms suddenly went off and the guard disappeared and we were caught. After that, I was thrown back into my cell and beaten, tortured," Hiccup stopped for a moment, taking a few deep breaths and continuing on, finding it difficult to admit what happened, "When Alvin thought I had learned my lesson, he told them to stop. He left saying to tie me up and leave me alone for a while and to not feed me until absolutely necessary. They all said they were gonna leave but they didn't. They chained me up and exposed me. They were laughing and joking about all the things they were gonna do to me. I was terrified..." Inside Hiccup's head, the entire situation was running on replay over and over again, reliving the worst parts.

Hiccup remembered how he was tied down. He remembered how it felt when each one had their turn with him. How they kicked him, how they punched him. He watched in agony as they set out a table. He remembered how it was filled with all sorts of instruments of torture. They took knives, and axes, and maces, and hammers. They never cut too deep. They never hit too hard. They never left scars. They never gave the dragon a fatal injury. They wanted to have fun, blow off steam. No, they weren't going to kill him. He knew they wouldn't kill him. They wanted him alive. They wanted to hear him scream out in agony, to call out for someone, to scream for anyone. They were angry and they needed a punching bag. That he remembered clearly. Every punch, every kick, every cut, every bruise, every smack, every hit. He remembered each and every one of them. He remembered how dazed he'd become. He remembered how his body was completely covered in pain. It was the first time in his life he wished he would die. It was the first time in his life where he honestly wanted it to all end there, just so the pain would stop. Unfortunately, he never got the luxury of ending it. He was only met with pain, again and again. He had been broken, and then, rebuilt. Then, something inside him snapped.

"Hiccup?" Astrid asked softly, snapping him out of his daze. Hiccup looked at Astrid quickly, bringing his full attention to her. Astrid stared back into those green eyes, scared of what she saw. An emotion she never saw before in his eyes, even when Dagur was mentioned or around, she never saw it on this level before. It was pure hatred. He wanted to kill the men who did this to him. He wanted to watch them suffer the way he did. It was something so unlike Hiccup that it was like she was looking at a completely different dragon. Some feral beast out for blood and revenge.

"Astrid?" Hiccup asked sharply when Astrid continued to stare.

"Don't," Astrid said softly, "You know killing them won't solve anything."

"It would be a nice start though," Hiccup said coldly.

"This isn't you Hiccup," Astrid said roughly, "This-this dragon isn't the Hiccup I know. Its some devilish being that really is the offspring of lightning and death itself. Some demon that craves blood."

"Maybe that's a good thing Astrid," Hiccup said, almost smiling a bit, "I'm dealing with my problems by killing the people who started them. It shows how much of a viking I really am. I'll kill those Outcasts and get Ryuu back. If they touch him in anyway I'll spill their guts onto the ground. I'll let their blood return to the mud from which it spawned."

Astrid stared at Hiccup, hardly able to contain her emotions.

"How could've he changed so much?" Astrid thought, "From that scared kid who turned into a dragon, that was physically weak and kinda incapable but had such a strong heart, set of morals, and will, that was kind, generous, and willing to help any and everybody no matter who they were or where they came from, he became this detached angel of death who craved the taste of blood." She couldn't see compassion in his eyes anymore. It was just blank. It was all just blank.

"The Hiccup I know doesn't kill people," Astrid said firmly. Hiccup stared at the girl, his gaze softening for a few moments before becoming razor sharp once again.

"Maybe the Hiccup you know doesn't exist anymore," the dragon called Hiccup said flatly. Astrid stared at Hiccup, unable to comprehend what her friend was becoming. The viking stood up quickly and ran from the room, kicking the door open and sprinting down the stairs and out towards Svelta's. She knew at this point, there was only one person who would ever be capable of mending Hiccup's shattered self.

She needed Toothless.

Hiccup sat alone in the room, staring at the door that was kicked open and left barely hanging from its hinges. Scattered on the floor were tiny wet splotches where her tears fell in rapid succession. Her heart was on her sleeve for those few moments, letting the world gander at her innermost feelings. Hiccup saw how terrified she was of him. He saw how angry she was, whether it was at the world, herself, the Outcasts, or at him, it was nearly scaring him.

The one thing he never showed to Astrid, however, was the just below the surface, the feelings he kept just out of sight, were scaring him the most. He truly felt hatred and anger, and that scared him. He wanted revenge, he wanted to see them dead, and that scared him. He knew what he was becoming and the person he was losing, and that scared him. He wanted to be himself again, he wanted to have to rely people, to know someone has his back, yet, that still scared him. He wasn't who he once was, and that scared him, terrified him, made him think twice about everything he thought about up until that very point in time. He wanted so badly for that Hiccup he had once been to return.

That anger kept him from his true self.

That cold, barren heart kept him from his morals.

That heart that was growing more detached kept him from his true emotions.

That person he was now, wasn't Hiccup, and that scared him.