A/N: New chapter at last! A bit later than I wanted, but the holidays kept me busy, so you guys get a slightly belated Christmas/New Year's present. Hope you all had a great holiday and New Year's!
Anyway, this chapter turned out much differently than I originally planned. I meant to have it as half Ayla's POV, half Mardin's POV, but it turns out Ayla had way more to say and do than I was expecting. So in the end, I decided to cut it short or it would have been an enormous chapter. This means you'll get to see more of Mardin's turn of events in the next chapter. I'm assuming most of those following this story have also read Ayla's story, so hopefully you'll enjoy getting a chance to read her POV again. And if any of you haven't read my previous story, I apologize and hope you'll still enjoy it anyway! At any rate, Ayla and Alistair will continue to have some presence in this story, more so than the Origins characters do in DA2 normally. Their POVs will be infrequent compared to Mardin's and Brianna's, but they will still happen, so I hope everybody is okay with that!
Also, there is some smut in this one, so if that's not your thing, it's fairly obvious when it starts, so you can skip over it if you like down to the next break in the chapter. Everything after that is plot.
Thanks to everyone who has favorited, followed, and read so far, I'm glad you're enjoying it!
Extra special thanks as always to my loyal reviewers WolFang1011, Tactus501st, Lethal Dragon, LostSpace and ArmyWife22079. I always love hearing from you guys! Special thanks also to Guest reviewer - I'm glad you enjoyed the quick meeting between siblings and the chapter, and hope you like this next one!
PLEASE REVIEW EVERYBODY! GIFT FIC TO 150TH REVIEWER!
As always, Bioware owns any characters/parts you recognize. I own the rest!
Chapter 15: Legacy
Ayla sat on the edge of the bed in their room at the inn, waiting for Alistair to return. He'd gone to get the both of them a tray of food after she'd had an unfortunate bout of vomiting while they were washing up following their mission. She'd had a fair few bouts of nausea since the start of her pregnancy, which Neria, their recently recruited healer, had told her was quite normal. She'd managed to keep all but two bouts secret from Alistair, however; this was only the second time he'd seen her get sick. Which was good, because each time, it sent him into a near panic, even though she'd reassured him she was fine both times.
Once she'd managed to convince him that she felt better, which she did, the nausea completely gone once she'd thrown up and her appetite returned, he'd told her he would go get them some food to eat in the privacy of their room in case she got sick again, and had insisted she wait in the room for him. She'd given in easily enough, thinking that it would give her some time to decide how precisely to tell him she was pregnant.
She'd initially been planning to wait until they'd returned to the Keep again to tell him, but after meeting up with Mardin the other day, she'd decided it wouldn't be fair to put it off much longer, especially since Mardin knew now too. Besides, it was likely she would start to show any day now. She'd been fortunate enough that her stomach had remained almost completely flat thus far, but Alistair knew her body as well, if not better, than she did and would be bound to notice as soon as that changed. The only reason he hadn't noticed the increased sensitivity of her breasts during their lovemaking so far was that she'd worked hard to keep him distracted.
She'd worked quite hard to hide any symptoms of her pregnancy from him the last few months, in fact, and he'd yet to notice anything so far. She hadn't wanted him to know until the pregnancy was a little further along, for a few reasons. Not the least of which was that she knew he would have tried to take her off missions the instant he'd known, whether or not she was still perfectly capable of undergoing them. She hadn't wanted to argue with him every single time, and especially not this last time, when all the other Wardens had been gone on other missions when they'd got word of the possible talking darkspawn sighted just north of Kirkwall. She had not been about to send Alistair off alone on that mission, and she knew he would have tried to go by himself if he'd known she was pregnant.
So, she hadn't told him, and they'd gone together to investigate the possibility of another talking darkspawn, hoping to prevent the rise of another Architect or Mother gathering followers to a cause. They'd defeated both of the intelligent darkspawn several months ago with the help of the other Wardens, but they hadn't been able to track down all of the darkspawn the Architect had managed to convert yet. Every time they got word of one, they made sure to track it down immediately before it became too much of a threat.
Fortunately, though this darkspawn had indeed been one of the intelligent, talking ones converted by the Architect, it hadn't managed to gather many followers yet due to its lack of any real plan, only about a dozen darkspawn willing to go along with it. She and Alistair had been able to track them down and defeat them without too much trouble, and had returned to Kirkwall tonight, three days after they'd come across Mardin. She had considered going to find her brother right away at the mansion he'd mentioned he was staying in during the letter he'd sent, but had decided it was too late at night and she was too tired, so they'd simply found an inn to stay in for the night, deciding they'd go to visit Mardin and his friends tomorrow after they'd bathed and rested.
And Ayla had decided that tonight was the perfect time to tell Alistair, now that the bulk of the danger of their mission was over. She was hoping that would soothe some of his anger at her delay in telling him, and she wanted him to know before they saw Mardin again, in case her brother accidentally let something slip.
Still, despite the time she'd been given to think while Alistair was gone, she hadn't come up with a great way to break the news yet, and now it was too late; she heard Alistair's footsteps just outside the door, his tread lighter in the leather boots, tunic and breeches he'd changed into after their bath, but still recognizable.
He pushed open the door with one hand, bearing a tray piled high with food in the other, and she couldn't keep the sudden spike of anxiety from flaring through her at the sight of him and the realization she was out of time to figure things out. Alistair felt it; his head snapped up and he looked sharply at her, concern flooding from him as he shut the door behind him and set the tray down on the table.
"What is it, love?" he demanded, scrambling over to her, kneeling in front of her and taking her cool hands in his much warmer ones. "Are you feeling sick again?"
"No, no, it's not that," she answered hastily, cursing herself for the worry and fear she could feel shooting through him. She had to tell him, whether she was ready or not; he was getting much too worried about her nausea. "I have something I have to tell you."
His eyes shot up to hers, the fear ratcheting up in him. "Maker, there's something wrong, isn't there? Are you really ill? You're not . . ." he shook his head, answering the question himself before she could get a word in edgewise. "No, you're not tainted, I'd know. You've been anxious since we saw your brother, though. You're not . . . you don't have to go back with him, do you? To your world?"
"Alistair, stop!" She squeezed his hands, feeling guilt building in her at all the worry she was causing him. "Just . . . stop guessing and let me tell you." When he took a deep breath, nodding, she went on firmly, "No, I am not going back to my world. Not ever; I'm staying here in Thedas, with you. I told you that. And my brother's been given his own destiny here, so he'll be staying in this world too. Which means I have absolutely no reason to go back to my world, now. I am not leaving you, I promise, okay?"
He let out a relieved sigh, some of his worry and fear dissipating, though it wasn't totally gone yet. "Okay. But, what is it you have to tell me, then?"
Well, there was no putting it off any longer, she thought, taking a deep breath of her own. "Alistair, I'm . . . pregnant."
For a long moment, he simply stared at her blankly, and she could feel nothing but shock emanating from him. She'd almost begun to wonder if he hadn't heard her when he repeated slowly, "You're . . . pregnant?"
She nodded, anxiously waiting for the oncoming storm, and was completely unprepared for the reaction she got instead.
Alistair leapt to his feet with a whoop, joy flooding from him like warm summer sunshine and ocean breezes, and Ayla couldn't help the smile spreading across her face as he exclaimed, "We're going to have a baby?!"
"We are," was all she managed to say before he scooped her up, whirling her in a circle, making her shriek with laughter and surprise.
"Oh, Maker, sorry!" He halted after the first full circle, carefully setting her down on the bed again. "I shouldn't be making you dizzy."
"I'm fine," she reassured him, smiling up at him as he sat on the bed next to her, beaming with joy still. "I don't feel dizzy at all."
"Wait, is that why you vomited earlier, because of the baby?" His brow furrowed when she nodded. "That doesn't mean something's wrong, does it?"
"No, not at all. Neria said it's quite common during pregnancy to have sudden bouts of nausea and vomiting. It's supposed to mostly happen in the morning, but apparently any time of day will do for me." She rolled her eyes. "Anyway, she told me it was nothing to worry about; it's perfectly normal and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with the baby."
Alistair let out a relieved sigh. "Good. Wait . . . Neria told you this? Does that mean she already knows?"
Oh, Goddess. Ayla didn't feel any anger coming from him yet, but she knew this line of questioning was going to lead there. She'd expected him to be angry right away when he realized she'd come on this mission pregnant, but apparently his initial surprise and joy at the news had temporarily overwhelmed any other consideration. Once he realized just how long she'd known about the pregnancy, though, she felt sure the anger would come. She wasn't about to lie to him, however. She would keep things secret from him if she felt the need, but she would never lie if he asked her a direct question.
"Neria knows. I needed her to confirm the pregnancy and make sure the baby was healthy so far," she explained. "And I'm sorry; I asked that she keep it a secret until I was able to tell you myself."
"But . . . we haven't seen Neria since . . ." he trailed off as he clearly remembered the last time they'd seen Neria, well over a month ago before Alistair had sent her off on a mission with Oghren. "Just how long have you known, Ayla?"
His voice held a distinct edge to it on the last question, and she nearly flinched. Now she could feel the thunderstorm sensation of his anger beginning to gather as she confessed softly, "I had Neria confirm it for me about three months ago." Like Mardy and any other shifter with an enhanced sense of smell, she was able to scent the changes pregnancy wrought on a body, particularly her own, and she'd gone to the elven mage almost immediately to confirm that she was right when she'd realized her scent had been consistently different for two weeks. She'd had Neria check the health of the baby and herself a few more times after that, as well, and had sworn her to secrecy, explaining her reasons. Though the young mage had been reluctant to keep such a thing secret from her Commander, she had eventually agreed. Now, seeing the fury lighting Alistair's eyes, Ayla just hoped she could keep him from blaming Neria for her part in this.
"Three months?! You've known for three months?! How could you not tell me?!" Alistair shouted, his anger raging through her like the thunderstorm she'd expected, washing out any other emotions he'd been feeling prior to her confession.
"I . . . I'm sorry," she whispered, feeling only shame herself. Normally his anger triggered her own, like most strong emotions felt through the bond, but she knew she had absolutely no right to be angry in return. "I just . . . I wanted to wait until I was further along, until I was more certain that everything would be okay. Neria also said that it's not uncommon to lose a baby during the first few months, and I didn't want to get your hopes up only to . . ." she shrugged, not wanting to finish that sentence. That had been one of her biggest, deepest fears, one she'd not even confessed to Mardy. He was staring at her, some of his anger having vanished at her last words, and she went on, "I'll be showing soon, though, so even though there's still a chance something could happen, I thought I should tell you. Plus, you were getting so worried about the nausea, and Mardy said it wasn't fair to keep it from you any longer –"
"You told your brother before you told me?! I'm your husband!" His voice was a near roar now, and this time she did flinch involuntarily; she'd never heard or felt him so angry in all the time she'd known him, not even during their argument when they'd first met Sigrun.
"No, no, I didn't tell him," she scrambled to explain, realizing just how badly she'd screwed this whole thing up by mentioning Mardy. "He knew the minute he saw me; he could smell it on me. I would never have deliberately told him before I told you, I swear, but it's been so long since I've been around another shifter I didn't even think of it when I saw him."
"He could smell it on you?" Alistair repeated dubiously, sounding – and feeling – a good deal calmer, and she let out a small breath, relieved as she nodded at him.
"He's got an enhanced sense of smell, just like me; most shifters do. It's the most common side effect, and it lets us smell anything that changes a body fundamentally, like pregnancy or a severe illness. He noticed it right away; I would never have told him otherwise, not before you knew. I was actually . . . going to tell you before we left the Keep this last time; remember when I said I had a surprise for you?"
Alistair nodded slowly, his anger dimming with every passing second, allowing her to breathe easier. It was surprisingly painful, feeling such a flood of anger coming from him when she didn't have her own to combat it with. "Before you could tell me, Varel came to tell us about the talking darkspawn, and I said we should leave right away, that we didn't have time to wait to see if some of the others would be back soon. You said you'd give me the surprise later." He shook his head, the anger building back up a few notches as he seemed to realize the implications of what he'd just said. "You came with me on this mission – just the two of us – knowing that you were pregnant? How could you let me endanger you – or our child – like that? How could you endanger yourself like that?"
She sighed. "What was my alternative, Alistair? Let you go alone? That would have put me in greater danger, because if something had happened to you . . ."
He reeled back, looking as though she'd slapped him. "If something happens to me while you're pregnant – you could – the baby –" His anger was suddenly completely gone, horror and fear taking its place as he stared at her with wide eyes.
She scooted across the distance separating them on the bed, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it, now wanting only to comfort him, his horror and fear striking deeply within her. "It'll be okay," she reassured him softly. "There's no guarantee that I'll die if you do. I told you, my father survived my mother's death. And as long as we make sure nothing happens to either one of us, everything will be fine. We'll just have to be more careful. I know . . . I know I can't keep going on missions once the pregnancy slows me down. In fact, this will likely be my last one. I'll stay back at the Keep from now on, do my best to help out from there. But you have to promise me . . . promise me you'll be careful, that you'll come back safe to me, okay? It's going to be hard enough for me to stay behind as it is, without feeling you get hurt or something while I'm not there with you. That was one of the other reasons why I didn't tell you until now, because I wasn't sure how I was going to deal with staying behind, and I wanted some time to get used to the idea before I started arguing with you about it."
He lifted her into his lap wordlessly, cradling her against him as he held her tightly, and she rested her head against his chest with a sigh, wrapping her arms around him, allowing the comfort of the embrace to wash over both of them, relieved that his anger, at least, was gone. "Maker, I'm so sorry," he murmured into her hair after a long moment.
"Sorry? What for?" she asked, surprised. He'd had every right to be angry at her for keeping things from him.
"I . . . wanted to have a child with you, but I never thought about any of this. I didn't consider how the bond would affect things, or what we would do while you were pregnant . . ." His grip on her tightened. "Honestly, as much as I wanted a child, I don't think I ever really expected it would happen. At least, not so soon . . . it's supposed to be really rare for a Warden to have children. I thought if it ever happened at all, it would take much longer than a few years . . ."
"Well, you have Morrigan to thank for that," Ayla said lightly, trying to distract him from the fear and worry still swirling through him. She leaned back a bit to watch his reaction, and just as she'd suspected, his head jerked up at her words.
"Morrigan? What did she do?!"
"Don't worry," she said quickly, "it was nothing like she did to ensure Kieran's birth. No magical ritual or anything. It was just a potion she'd been working on, with several different herbs that would boost fertility. And maybe a bit of healing magic added in, I'm not sure. Anyway, she wasn't even sure it would work, so I didn't tell you that she'd given it to us last time she visited. Like I said, I didn't want to get your hopes up. But if my guess is right, it only took a few weeks after I added it to our drinks for it to work."
"Just a potion?" he repeated, tipping her face up to study it closely. "You're sure?"
She nodded firmly. "That's what she said, and my instincts didn't go off, so . . ."
"So she must have been telling the truth," Alistair finished softly. "Okay. Then I suppose we do have her to thank for yet another thing." He rolled his eyes, and Ayla smiled, pleased that her distraction had worked so well as he went on, "Since it does work, some of the other Wardens might eventually be interested in it, as well."
"They might," Ayla agreed. "And I thought . . . it couldn't hurt to try, if it was just a potion. You are . . . happy about this, right?" She hadn't felt that warm sunshine since her initial confession, and now she was growing worried she wouldn't feel it again after bringing up her own concerns.
"Of course I am!" Alistair exclaimed with shock, looking down at her. "I'm just worried about the next few months and what we're going to do, but you know how much I've wanted to have a child with you. Like I said, I just didn't think of how we would handle the details, but . . ." He trailed off, obviously considering something before he squeezed her again. "I'll figure something out, I will. I'll meet with Varel, Nathaniel and a few of the other Wardens that understand the situation when we get back, and explain that I might have to take on fewer field missions for a bit, at least try to avoid the riskier ones, or the longer ones. Once you've given birth, then I'll have to take on full duties again, since we have so few Wardens, but in the meantime, I'll see if I can't step back a bit, run things from the Keep a bit more. Will that set your mind at ease, love?"
"It will help," she agreed softly, touched at his consideration. He'd always been so careful to be as hands-on as possible with his duties, so that the other Wardens had no reason to feel that he wasn't doing his share, and no reason to feel that he wasn't a good Commander. The fact that he was willing to change things for her sake and for the safety of their unborn child relieved her as nothing else could, and touched her more than any other words that he could have said.
"Good. I still don't understand, though, why you didn't tell me as soon as you knew. Why you felt the need to hide it from me for so long." His tone held a bit of rebuke in it still, though he rubbed his hand soothingly over her bare back. She was only in her smallclothes and breastband, not having bothered to fully dress while waiting for him, and she was grateful for it now, very much appreciating the feel of his rough, warm hand on her bare skin.
She hesitated as she thought through all the reasons that she'd believed were perfectly acceptable at the time, tangled up as they were, some of them rooted so deep she wasn't sure she could give voice to them. "I had a few reasons, but mainly, as I said, I didn't want you to be disappointed. I know how badly you wanted to have a child, and I didn't want to get your hopes up if Morrigan's potion didn't work, or if I lost the baby before it was ever born. I didn't want to get your hopes up only to destroy them." She didn't meet his eyes, instead leaning her head against his chest, for while that was the truth, it wasn't all of it.
"And what about you? You wanted a child too. Were you just planning on dealing with the pain all by yourself if you lost the baby? You weren't ever going to tell me?" She shrugged, unsure what she would have done in that case. She'd spent most of her spare time busy praying to the Goddess that it wouldn't ever happen, not thinking about what she would do if it did. "I still don't understand what you were thinking." He sounded equally confused and frustrated right now, and more than a little hurt.
It was the hurt that finally drove her to say, "I was afraid."
"Afraid? Of what?" This time Alistair forced her eyes up to meet his with a hand on her chin, searching her face, and wouldn't let her look away.
"As soon as Neria confirmed I was pregnant, I was thinking about telling you right away, and then she started listing some of the things to watch out for, and told me that it wasn't uncommon to lose a baby in the early stages of pregnancy. That's when I . . . became afraid. Afraid that if I told you right away, and something happened and I did lose the baby, that you'd . . ." Her voice broke and she shook her head minutely in his grip. It was a ridiculous, irrational fear, and she was ashamed of herself for thinking it, much less for letting it be one of the main reasons she hadn't told him yet.
"Afraid I'd what?" he pressed when she didn't go on. "Please, love, I can see your fear. I can feel it and it's killing me." He brushed a thumb gently over her cheek, though he still didn't let her go. "Tell me."
"It was stupid," she told him. "It was irrational. But . . . I was afraid that if I lost the baby, especially if it happened while I was on a mission the first few months, because I wasn't about to stay behind when I was still fully capable of fighting, that you'd . . . blame me. That eventually you'd come to . . . hate me for it."
His hand dropped from her face as though it had burned him, horror and hurt swamping him as he scooted out from under her, backing away from her, shaking his head. "You actually thought . . . how could you even think that I would ever . . ." He buried his head in his hands, and she suddenly wanted to cry at the terrible hurt rising through him, the sensation like stabbing knives. He looked up suddenly, pinning her with a fierce look. "Do you not trust me? Is that it?"
"Alistair, how could you ask that?" she demanded, hurt piercing her in turn. "Of course I trust you! Have I not trusted you with my very life, soul, and heart? I told you, it wasn't a rational fear. I was ashamed of myself for even thinking it, which is why I didn't want to tell you about it, but I couldn't make it go away. And may I remind you, you once thought I would come to resent you for not being able to provide me with children. Did that mean that you didn't trust me?"
He blinked, looking a little stunned as he clearly remembered their first discussion about children, the hurt rapidly diminishing in him, causing her to take a relieved breath. "No. No, of course not. It was," he gave her a wry look, "an irrational fear. And as I recall, you still told me I was an idiot for even thinking it. As you are if you ever thought I could possibly hate you for any reason, but especially one that wouldn't even be your fault."
She smiled. "You're right. I am an idiot. Like I said, I knew it was stupid, but I couldn't seem to dismiss it, and so for that and other reasons, I kept the whole thing secret from you for as long as I thought I possibly could, hoping I'd be past the stage where I'd have to worry about it by the time I told you."
He pulled her closer again, so they were facing one another on the bed as he took her hands in his once more, squeezing them lightly. "Let me help you dismiss it then, so you never worry about it again. Because I'm only going to explain this to you once," he told her, echoing her words from their earlier conversation with a mocking grin. "Yes, I want a child, but I want our child, because I love you more than anything, as I've told you before. And even if we lose the baby, no matter the circumstances, I will still love you. I'd be upset if we lost the baby, of course, as I know you would be, but I'd be able to live with it so long as I still had you. Because you are my heart, my soul, my life, and I can't live without you. And you have no reason – irrational or otherwise – to believe that I ever could, do you understand?"
Ayla nodded, smiling. She'd been wrong to think before that he couldn't relieve her any more than he already had. She should have known her mate would find a way to turn her head even more with his sweet words; he'd always been so good at it. "Just when I think I can't love you any more than I already do," she teased him, tossing his earlier words back at him in turn, feeling more light-hearted than she had in months. "You always manage to surprise me, my love."
He grinned at her, and she could feel that sunshine welling up in him again, a welcome sensation after the turbulent ones they'd both dealt with for the past several minutes. "I'm glad to hear it. I won't be giving you up for any reason, but if I can manage it at all, I'll be keeping both of you." He let go of one of her hands to press his over her bare stomach. "Is there really a baby in there?"
"There is," she answered softly, seeing the awe in his eyes and feeling the glow of his happiness trigger her own as he rubbed gentle circles over her belly. "Our baby."
"Our baby," he echoed, looking up at her, and she nearly gasped at the sudden flare of heated lust that spiked through him as he said the words. "We made it together."
"We did," she agreed almost breathlessly, feeling an answering lust rise up through her. It had been a few weeks now since she'd last had his hand on her bare skin, and she suddenly wanted that hand – and that mouth of his – everywhere on her, very badly, the need nearly overwhelming in its sudden and surprising urgency. "I don't suppose you remember how we did it?" she added, striving to make her tone teasing instead of breathless.
"Well, I don't know if I remember all of the exact details . . ." His hand rubbed a little lower on her stomach, teasing its way below the edge of her smallclothes, while his other hand finally let go of hers in favour of trailing up her side, his eyes hotly following the path of his fingers as they came steadily closer to her breastband. "So I might have to make some up," he went on, his voice deepening to a low rumble, "but I'm sure I can at least remember the basics of how we did it."
"Good, because I think I need you to refresh my memory." She unwound her breastband hastily, allowing her already aching breasts to fall free. Now that there was no need to hide it, she wanted him to find out just exactly how sensitive she was to his touch there.
He didn't disappoint her, either; the hand that had been trailing up her ribcage immediately went to one breast, caressing it, his thumb rubbing over her nipple, and she cried out sharply at the lightning bolt of lust that shot through her at the touch. Her hips bucked, causing his other hand to slide a bit closer to her core, further beneath her smallclothes.
"Ayla . . ." His eyes shot up to hers, blazing with heat. "Something else you need to tell me, love?"
"I might . . . be a little more sensitive to your touch . . . there . . ." Her breath hitched out the last word in a long, low moan as his mouth closed over the nipple he'd been tormenting, sucking on it strongly, the pleasure flashing through her so intensely it was almost painful. She gripped his hair in her hand, pulling his head back. "Need you to stop," she gasped. "It's too . . . much."
He shook his head. "No." He pulled her hand free from his hair, and before she quite knew what had happened, she was flat on her back on the bed, pinned beneath the weight of him, one of his hands keeping hers pressed together above her head. "You, my love, need to be punished for keeping secrets from me."
She felt like she was burning up from the inside out at his words, at the half-wild look in his eyes, and at the throbbing arousal currently pressed against her thigh. "Do I now? And just how do you plan to do that with so many clothes on still?"
He raised his eyebrows at her. "You have a good point." He pushed himself off her, piercing her with a fierce glare. "Don't move," he ordered her sternly as he stood up, beginning to strip off the tunic and breeches he wore.
She couldn't help herself; she enjoyed it when he got all dominant with her, and she wanted to see just what he intended to do if she did move. Plus, she was about half-mad with lust herself, so as soon as he was naked, she was across the bed, gripping his fully aroused cock in her hand and stroking it, causing him to groan loudly as the fire swirled ever higher in both of them. She'd only got a few strokes in, and was about to take him in her mouth when she suddenly found herself pinned again.
"I thought I warned you not to move," he growled at her, sounding rather breathless himself, while she revelled in the feel of his warm, hard body pressing down on hers.
"So what are you going to do about it?" she challenged him, wriggling her body beneath his, unable to suppress a moan as her breasts brushed against his chest.
"I'll make sure you don't get to touch me while you're being punished." Before she could quite work out what he meant by that, he'd bound her hands together above her head with her breastband. She tugged experimentally, pleased and intrigued as she always was when he took control like this; the longer they'd been together, the bolder he had grown with it, knowing how much she liked it. He'd gotten better at the tying, too; it wasn't too tight, but she wouldn't be getting out of it anytime soon, not without a focus she suspected she'd soon be lacking.
As if to confirm her suspicions, he sat up a little, trailing his hands down her arms until he'd reached her breasts again, cupping them in both hands, kneading them and rolling her nipples with his fingers. "Alistair . . ." she moaned, her whole body alight with desire as she felt the liquid warmth growing between her legs. Then she shrieked when his mouth closed on her nipple again, licking and sucking strongly, the intense need throbbing through her with each pull of his mouth.
By the time he'd switched to her other breast, she was a writhing mess, trying to yank her hands free, aching to touch him and arching her hips against him, desperate to have her mate inside her. "Alistair, please," she begged. "I need you in me. Deep inside me."
He moaned against her breast at the words, flicking his tongue over her nipple, and the vibration combined with the sensitivity of her breasts and the fire raging through her was too much. She crested hard, fire and pleasure bursting through her body, making her see stars.
Before she'd quite recovered from that, he'd slid down her body, pulling her smallclothes off and parting her thighs gently, his hands sliding up her legs as he did so. "Have you been punished enough, love?" He played his fingers teasingly over her entrance.
"Yes," she gasped, lust rising in her again at the touch so close to her aching core, surprising her with how fast it was building up once more - though she wasn't going to complain about it.
"You'll never keep secrets from me again?" he prompted, his thumb flicking over her throbbing nub.
"Never," she managed, her mind addled both from the feel of his fingers and thumb lightly toying with her, and from the fever-pitch of the lust she could feel coming from him in spite of the calmness of his words. He was close to bursting, and his control was wearing thin. With that in mind, she pushed him a little further, arching her hips up in offering. "Take me, my love, my mate. You know how much I want you to."
"Ayla . . ." he breathed, and she could clearly see the struggle on his face. Just when she thought she'd won, though, he slipped two fingers deeply within her, making her cry out. "Maker, you're so wet . . ." he leaned up to murmur the words in her ear as he curled his fingers, stroking them deeply in her, over and over, causing her hips to buck again.
This time, when she screamed her release, he swallowed the cry with his own mouth, kissing her hard and thoroughly. She met his tongue, stroke for stroke as she rode out the wave, wishing desperately that she could wrap her arms around him, could keep his head in place when he pulled it away, but she hadn't worked herself loose yet.
He was just poised at her entrance, about to take her as she'd demanded, her body quivering with the anticipation of it, when he froze, his eyes widening as a sudden thought obviously occurred to him. "The baby . . . I'm not going to –"
"No, no," she interrupted him hastily, immediately understanding his concern and wanting to reassure him before he changed his mind. "You will not hurt the baby, no matter how far along I am, I promise you. You'll just annoy its mother if you don't bloody take me like I asked you to –"
Her words cut short when he thrust deeply into her, the hard length of him filling her in the way she'd so desperately missed these past few weeks while they travelled. She moaned in satisfaction at the feeling, raising her hips to meet his, wrapping her legs around him. "Punishment . . . over?" she got out between frantic thrusts, lifting her hands up. When he didn't answer immediately, she deliberately tightened herself around his cock, causing him to let out a strangled noise as he froze once more.
"It's over," he agreed quickly, untying her hands before he took up his rhythm again, thrusting in and out rapidly, his breathing becoming fast and erratic as he moved.
She sighed in relief, flexing her hands for a moment as she matched his strokes before she raked her nails down his back, causing him to growl and swivel his hips, making her moan. She could feel how close he was to his peak, how hot the fire of his lust was blazing, and it was only stoking her own again. She gripped his head in one head, taking his mouth in a heated kiss again as they moved together, before she jerked his head to the side and bit down hard on the juncture of his neck and shoulder. He let out a harsh cry before he erupted inside her, the pleasure bursting through him triggering her own final fall as her body clutched him tightly, deeply within her before they fell together on the bed, sweaty and spent.
He eventually rolled them over so she could sprawl on top of him as he cradled her against his chest, stroking her skin gently, massaging her muscles carefully. "I shouldn't have done that," he mumbled after a few moments, and she could feel guilt trickling through him as he rubbed her shoulders. "I might have still been a little mad."
"That's fine," she told him, flapping her hand, "because you absolutely should have done that, and I wanted you to. I enjoyed it very thoroughly, believe me."
She peeked up at him, noticing the smile that spread across his face as he breathed out in relief. "I suppose you did. Still, I shouldn't have been so rough with you –"
"Stop that right now," she ordered him. "I have not suddenly become more fragile now that I'm pregnant. The only reason I'm not going on missions anymore is that it will eventually start to slow my reaction time, and being even a few seconds slower could be dangerous. It is not because I am suddenly made of glass, and you'd better not treat me like I am, got it?"
He nodded. "Got it. Still –" he hesitated, and she raised her eyebrows at him, wondering what he was worried about now before he finally went on, "I should have thought about it earlier, but I wasn't exactly thinking clearly. Anyway, you are positive that making love is not going to hurt the baby, right?"
She laughed softly. "Completely positive, I told you. I knew pregnant women back home that continued to bed their mates right up until they gave birth. The babies were always perfectly healthy. You don't need to worry. We can make love as many times as we like and he will be just fine."
Alistair grinned at her. "He?" he repeated, looking curious.
"He," she nodded for emphasis, "will be a handsome, charming, stubborn boy just like his father."
"Really? Because I'm thinking that she –" he stressed the word, smirking at her – "will be a beautiful, brave, troublesome handful just like her mother."
"Well," she poked him in the chest, "I guess we'll just have to wait and see which one of us is right, now won't we?"
"I guess we will." He smacked her lightly on the ass, startling a surprised laugh out of her as he went on, "And when we find out I'm right, I believe I should get some sort of reward."
"Or I get a reward when we find out I'm right," she retorted, though she smiled at him. She could feel nothing but contentment and love at the moment, her worry and fear from earlier nothing but distant memories now that he had reassured her.
She could feel the same emotions flooding back from him as he squeezed her, pressing a kiss lightly to the top of her head. "Fine, then. Whichever one of us is right will get a reward from the other, if you agree." When she nodded, he went on teasingly, "It'll be me, though."
"Is that so?" She rolled her eyes when he nodded smugly. "Well, either way, your child and your mate are hungry." She pushed herself up, crawling over him to get to the other side of the bed, closer to the table and the food he'd brought in earlier.
"I'm hungry too," he agreed as he sat up, and then he scooped her up before she could protest, carrying her over to the table and setting her down in one of the chairs.
She sighed, pulling the tray closer to her and picking up one of the slices of bread. "You're not going to be carrying me everywhere, either," she warned him.
"Of course not," he said amiably, picking up one of the wheels of cheese himself. "I wouldn't dream of it."
She narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously as she took a bite of the bread, not believing him for a second, but decided to let it slide in favour of her hunger for the moment, which was suddenly intense, leading her to devour the bread and several other pieces of the food Alistair had brought, while he ate the remainder. They spent the rest of their night discussing their child and its future before Ayla finally succumbed to sleep, more exhausted than she'd realized.
She was a bit disoriented to wake up the next morning and find that Alistair was not in the bed with her, wrapped around her as he had been when she'd fallen asleep. She sat up and looked around the room, her heart spiking a bit in anxiety when the sunlight falling through the gap in the curtains revealed a room completely empty of her mate.
Just when she was starting to get a little worried, though she couldn't feel any alarming emotions from the bond, she heard his voice murmur quietly outside the door, "Just wait until I see if she's awake."
"I'm awake," she called back to him, wondering who he had with him at the door – Mardin, maybe? – as she scrambled out of bed, hastily tugging on Alistair's discarded tunic which still lay on the floor and would do well enough for clothing until she could get dressed properly in her armor again. "Just give me a minute!"
She could smell, though, as she neared the door, running a hand hastily through her loose hair, that it wasn't her brother with Alistair. There were two other men outside the door, one whose scent she knew immediately, though the other was unfamiliar, making her curious as she pulled open the door to admit Alistair and his guests.
Alistair stepped into the room, back in his plate armor once more as she'd suspected, smiling at her. Nathaniel entered behind him, still wearing the skirted leather armor that he'd always favoured, followed by the young, dark-haired man whose scent Ayla didn't know, who closed the door behind him. He couldn't have been much past eighteen, she thought, and he bore a greatsword similar to Aedan's strapped to his back, over what was very clearly a new suit of plate armor. A blush spread over his face as he took in her loose hair and the large tunic that fell to her knees, leaving her legs bare, and he quickly glanced off to the side, making her smile with amusement.
Nathaniel's expression, however, didn't change as he bowed to her; like most of the senior Fereldan Wardens, he'd caught both her and Alistair in various stages of undress often enough that it no longer bothered him. "My lady," he greeted her.
"Really, Nathaniel?" she said with a sigh. "How many times have we had this conversation?"
A small smile broke across his normally grim face. "Ayla. I'm glad to see you're well. And I'm simply trying to teach our new recruit some manners." He nodded at the younger man.
"I'm glad to see you're well, also. And don't bother, I don't want him calling me that either," she replied with a dismissive wave of her hand. "How did you find us here, anyway?"
"I didn't, actually; the Commander found us," Nathaniel said.
"I went to the dead drop here in Kirkwall this morning," Alistair explained when she turned to look at him in surprise. "I was going to leave word for whoever checked it that we would be delayed for a few days while we stayed to visit your brother. And I didn't want to wake you up just for that; I thought you'd need your sleep." His eyes were warm as they dropped to her stomach before he went on, "Anyway, I found Nathaniel there about to do the same thing."
"I was about to leave word that we were going to delay our return, as well," Nathaniel added. "The others are still at the inn where we stayed last night. We had decided to stay and investigate why we were attacked at the docks yesterday, and I went to the dead drop to leave word, only to find the Commander there."
"Once he'd explained what happened and who our new recruit is, though, I thought we should take care of it instead," Alistair told her. "Besides, it's been quite some time since Nathaniel and the others have been back at the Keep, and Velanna should be back by now as well. I'm sure she'd like to see you, Nathaniel."
"Well, I doubt she'll admit to that," Nathaniel said wryly, "but I'd like to see her. That is, if you're sure you can do without the back-up, Commander."
Alistair nodded. "I'm sure. With Ayla's brother and his friends to help –"
"Just what precisely happened?" Ayla interrupted, curiosity nearly overwhelming her. "Who attacked you? And you haven't introduced your new recruit yet, either."
"Actually, I was the one attacked, my lady," the young man said, finally looking at her, though the blush hadn't abated any. "My name is Carver Hawke, and I just recently went through the Joining after . . . getting tainted down in the Deep Roads. Anyway, we were attacked by a bunch of dwarves down at the docks yesterday, but they seemed to be mainly after me, and they kept saying something about the 'blood of the Hawke'. We managed to defeat them, but I think my sister might be in trouble too. And . . . your brother is Mardin, right?"
"He is, but how did you . . . Oh!" Ayla suddenly remembered the last name of the female mage she was sure her brother was interested in. Hawke, her name had been. Brianna Hawke. "Is your sister Brianna, then? That's quite a coincidence," she said in surprise when Carver nodded.
"So it would seem," Nathaniel agreed before Carver could say anything himself. "I was actually going to leave word at the drop as well that we'd met your brother down in the Deep Roads when we found Carver, but obviously I don't need to, since you've met up with him yourself. And," he hesitated for a moment, glancing over at Alistair, "it seems Anders knows your brother, as well."
Alistair's face went cold instantly, his jaw set with anger as Ayla felt the whirling storm rise up in him. "So he ran to Kirkwall, did he?"
"Alistair." She laid a gentle hand on his arm. "I'm fine, and I told you, I don't blame him for what happened. And may I remind you, I've done a similar thing myself."
"Well, I blame him," Alistair retorted, though he was already calming at her touch. "Not so much for attacking you; I know that was an accident, like what you did to Aedan, but because he didn't listen about Justice in the first place, and because he ran away afterwards rather than face me. And he abandoned us."
"I told him as much," Nathaniel added, his face set in equally angry lines. "He claims that he left for the good of everyone, though."
"Look," Carver said quickly, before Alistair could reply, "I'm sorry to interrupt, and I get that you're all upset with Anders, but my sister could be in real danger, here. And if she's with your brother, so is he. We were attacked by quite a few dwarves, and if they catch my sister alone, or just with your brother . . ."
While Ayla knew Mardin was fully capable of protecting himself, she still couldn't help but be worried at Carver's words. Mardin had always been a bit reckless when it came to protecting others, and even he could be overwhelmed by large numbers, just as her father had been. And that . . . well, she wasn't sure she could live with that, especially not so soon after finally seeing him again. "He's right," she agreed. "We have to go warn Mardy, and Carver's sister, right now. We might already be too late. We can worry about Anders later."
Alistair's face softened, and he pulled her closer, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as he obviously felt her worry and fear for Mardy. "You're right. Nathaniel, you go back to the others and take them on the next ship back to Ferelden. Let Varel know we'll be back as soon as we've dealt with this, but it might be a few weeks. And see if Velanna has figured out that message spell she's been working on once you're back; it would be a lot handier than the dead drop if we can send instant messages back and forth. I'm sure you'll do your best to manage affairs with Varel until I can return."
"Of course, Commander." Nathaniel snapped a salute before nodding to Ayla. "Take care, Ayla. I'll see the two of you back at the Keep." He headed for the door, waving in acknowledgement of the farewell Ayla called after him.
Alistair turned to Carver even as Nathaniel left their room. "Carver, you'll be coming with us to investigate these dwarves and why they're attacking you and your family, and once that's resolved and Ayla's had some time to visit with her brother, you'll be coming back to the Keep with us. In the meantime, though, I'll ask you to wait outside the room while she gets ready; we'll get to your sister as soon as we can, I promise."
The blush deepened on Carver's face at the reminder of what Ayla was wearing, she noted with a little amusement cutting through her worry. He was quick to nod, though, snapping a hasty salute in imitation of Nathaniel. "Uh, yes, Commander. I'll, um, I'll be right outside when you're ready. Thank you!"
He beat a hasty retreat to the door, and as soon as it closed behind him, Ayla stripped off Alistair's tunic, pulling on her smallclothes and breastband before hurrying over to the armor stand in the corner where she'd left her drake-scale armor and swords the night before.
"Don't worry, love," Alistair said soothingly as she tugged on her armor. "I'm sure your brother will be fine. In fact, having met him myself now, I'm quite certain he can handle an attack," he added dryly.
Ayla smiled, knowing that Mardy had probably been harder on Alistair than either of them had been willing to admit to, but the amusement still didn't dampen her worry completely. If Mardy had feelings for this Brianna like she thought he might, and considering his line of questioning when she'd seen him last and the fact that she'd caught traces of the woman's scent on him, she was pretty sure that he did, he was likely to be more reckless than usual while protecting her. And if she lost him . . . but no, she wouldn't think of that. She shook her head firmly. He'd be fine. He would.
"I'm sure you're right," she murmured as she finished getting her armor on and strapped on her swords, "but I'll feel better when I see him for myself. Let's go find that mansion he was talking about first, see if he's there."
"All right, love," Alistair agreed as he followed her to the door. They met up with Carver in the hallway before leaving the inn and heading through the streets towards the area of Kirkwall known as Hightown, while Ayla prayed to the Goddess as they went that her brother – and Carver's sister – would both be fine when they got there.
It was instinct that woke Mardin up, had him rolling his body over Brianna's to protect her before he even knew the reason for it. As soon as the cold steel pierced deeply into his back, though, he understood, as he roared with pain and rage.
A/N: The next chapter will flash back a bit on Mardin's POV to show what led to him sleeping in bed with Brianna, and will then go on from here. I just couldn't resist adding this little cliffhanger in at the end ;). Hope you liked it!