Previously...

You were suddenly filled with dread. You hadn't realised how badly you didn't want to go back. During the past three hours, there hadn't been anyone to stare at you or make comments. You'd been completely alone with your thoughts. Now, though, you had to eat with the whole camp where there were hundreds of eyes looking at you. You desperately wanted to skip, but if you didn't show up then Rex and Charity would be worried and you didn't want to do that to them.

Plus, you were starving.

Sighing deeply, you twisted your crutches in the direction of the mess hall. It was now or never.

Surprisingly enough, lunch wasn't as bad as you thought it would be.

It was worse.

The second you came into view of the tables, peoples' conversations died down until nearly everyone was looking at you. Whispers were passed from mouth to ear. You shrunk down under their gazes and made your way to where your siblings were seated. After a few moments of silence, the noise levels slowly rose to where they were before. Either way, it was pretty awkward. You appreciated how Rex glared at anybody who stared too long and Charity would stare right back, not breaking eye contact, until the person got uncomfortable and shifted their view.

As they did that, you were looking around for a certain somebody. Percy wasn't anywhere to be seen- not at his table, Annabeth's, or with Nico. The empty seat at the Poseidon table left you with an odd feeling. You shook your head, tearing your eyes away from his spot. Why did you care where he was? You were mad at him. No, you were furious at him. The dormant emotion in your chest re-ignited with a burning anger. There, that's more like it.

People eventually returned to their own conversations as you felt gazes leave your body. You figured now would be the time to escape and nudged Rex. "Hey," you whispered. "I'm gonna go back to the cabin. Maybe take a little nap."

The corner of his mouth quirked up in a mischievous smirk. "So you're saying that you'll be sleeping and unaware of what's happening around you? Bold of you to give me this information."

You glared at him. "Rex, I swear to all the gods if you prank me I will guarantee you won't be able to sleep for a whole week."

He raised his hands up in the surrender sign. "Hey, just having a little fun."

You laughed and ruffled his hair. He scowled and swatted your hand away, fixing up the mess you made. "See you later, Rex."

"Yeah yeah, see you."

You ended up in your cabin a few minutes later. True to your word, you quickly fell asleep, the only thought on your mind being that you hoped you wouldn't wake up with some sort of slime on your face.

(~)

The days passed quickly, quicker than you expected. One moment you would be at the tree, the next you would be sitting at dinner, wondering where the day had gone.

You spent your time doing one of two things. A portion of your day was dedicated to working out. Now that you had settled into life back in camp, you figured it would be a good time to re-start building up your strength. You couldn't stay in the crutches forever, after all.

You didn't work out in the arena like most campers. For one, that was primarily a sword-fighting place, not a doing-push-ups-on-the-floor kind of place. Secondly, the number of eyes on you would be immense. You could't deal with so many people looking at you. You feared you would snap and scream at them all, then be forever known as the "crazy girl". So, you opted to find some spacious area on the grass, hidden behind the amphitheatre, where no one passed and no one could see you. There, you would work out for about two hours in 20 minute chunks, since Will forced (read: threatened) you to promise you wouldn't strain yourself. Stupid Will and his stupid boyfriend who stood watching you make the promise and now you were too afraid to go back on it.

Or, you would be lost in thought. You knew it was bad for you to do that, but you figured- what was the harm in doing it? What else would you do for the rest of the day? This was a perfect way to let the days pass by when you were all alone. You could simply sit back and relax, then have Charity rouse you back into reality when it was time for supper. Besides, it was hard not to lose track of time when you didn't have anything to do for the whole day. And you didn't realise it was happening when it happened. You would just think about one memory, and suddenly you went speeding down the memory lane, veering off the road and crashing into a pit you couldn't get out of. No worries, though. You were positive that it would all stop and get easier to control when you actually had something else to occupy your thoughts.

Sometimes you stayed in the amphitheatre, resting on the top seat of the bleachers. Other times, when you knew there would be an event taking place there, you would venture to your tree. You tried not to go there too much, or at least not get lost in thought whenever you were there, because you inevitably started thinking about your friends. It was always a fine line between a happy memory or a sad memory. You didn't want to risk remembering something bad.

Also, you had started to develop some... fears, you could say. Most of them had to do with being in large groups. You had started to hate eating at the mess hall with the whole camp. It wasn't just because you felt people looking at you- that had actually begun to dial down. It was other things that you couldn't quite explain.

Sometimes, everything would suddenly become too loud. The sounds were drowning. People's voices carried across the whole mess hall, mixing in the air and becoming an unmanageable noise. The sound of cutlery scraping a plate, food being chewed, benches and tables creaking, it suffocated you until you couldn't stand it for another second. You would stagger out of your seat, having only eaten half of what was on your plate, and whisper to Charity that you were going to take a nap. Even your own voice felt too loud.

Other times, or even at the same time, everything was too bright. The colours felt like they burned your eyes, and even when you squeezed them shut, you felt they were penetrating the darkness and filling up your whole brain with their light. Touch became incredibly sensitive as well. Much like the colours, anything touching you felt burning. You sometimes had to unstrap you crutches because you would become increasingly aware of the way they rubbed against your skin. Even Charity brushing her hand against your arm slightly was enough to ignite it with tingles, each one feeling like a stab with a needle, only fading away when you swatted at it a few times.

You were only mildly concerned about it. You figured that it was understandable that you didn't like being around people, especially after all the "special treatment" people gave you. They would stare, obviously, but also walk away quickly when you hobbled in their general direction. There were those who whispered and eyed you, obviously talking about you. Some would offer to help if you appeared to be struggling in the sand, to which you would politely decline. It made you feel weak and helpless. And, of course, the rumours. For whatever reason, people would always spread rumours, even when they already (somehow) knew about the whole incident. You would hear people talking about how you actually left camp to fight the primordial in person. They would speak in hushed tones, saying how it was impossible for something like that to happen, and that you were making it all up. Even worse than that was the rumour that you planted the darkness there in the first place then removed it to make Percy like you for saving him.

You tried to ignore it all. And the best way to do that was to simply remove yourself from reality.

Currently, you were at your tree. The Apollo kids were practicing in the amphitheatre for tonight's campfire, so you had to kick yourself out of there. You were lying on your back, staring up at the leaves that encased you like a globe. The crutches lay discarded to the side. You were thinking. Not about anything specific. Life in general. Of course, that was a huge mistake, because you felt your thoughts eventually lead you to Percy.

Gods, how you were angry. You couldn't stop thinking about your rage. It was all you felt when his name popped up in your dwellings. You wanted to blame him for everything that had happened. It felt like the easiest way to deal with it. But you couldn't bring yourself to that point. You were angry for a different reason. Not because you felt it was all his fault, which it wasn't. You were angry that he didn't visit you and left you feeling scared and hopeless. You had already established this with yourself, so why couldn't you accept it and move on?

You groaned and closed your eyes, rubbing them with your hands. Why were emotions so confusing? Why wouldn't your mind just understand that it had happened and it was over with?

What if it didn't happen?

Your hands stilled. What was that thought?

It didn't happen. It wasn't real. It was a dream.

Arms dropping to your sides, you frowned. That didn't make sense at all. Obviously, it had happened. You lived through it- something you really didn't feel like thinking about. It stressed you out to the point that you would get a massive migraine and feel like your emotions were attacking you all at once.

Are you here? Are you (Y/N)?

You felt seriously creeped out from these thoughts of yours. A ball of dread began to form in the pit of your stomach. They didn't make any sense-

Or is this a dream?

You shot up into a sitting position, eyes wide.

You're not real. None of this is real.

You started to shake.

Move your hand. Move it. Move it.

Your hand lay limp in your lamp. You stared at it. It was the same hand you had always had. You stared at it longer. Something clicked in your mind. Suddenly, it felt... gray. It was there, yet it wasn't. It was real, yet fake. Is this real life? Or is this a fantasy? It started to tremble. Before your very eyes, it started to come undone, the atoms that make it up buzzing, distorted, shimmering like they couldn't hold together.

Panicked, you urged yourself to feel the thought- move your hand! -sensing the command go from the nerves in it to your brain then back to your hand, and then you saw it lift. The process was supposed to be automatic and unnoticeable, you knew that, but at that moment it was all broken down into its barest form.

You brought your other hand next to the right. They were shaking. They were gray. They weren't real.

The world exploded.

(~)

When you came to, it was because someone was shaking your shoulder.

"Hey. Hey, (Y/N). You there?"

You blinked. Your eyes felt stiff and dry, like you hadn't blinked in hours. You blinked again, then looked up from your slouched position to see Will, kneeling down in front of you, one hand on your arm.

He smiled. "Hey, (Y/N). You were gone for a pretty long time there."

Your eyebrows furrowed together. "What d-d-do you mean?"

"Oh, you know, lost in thought. I hear it's been happening quite a bit these past few days."

Sighing, you straightened up, rolling your shoulders to relieve some of the stiffness that had built up. "I mean, yeah. It's n-n-not like there's anything else for me t-t-to do."

"Well, I have been informed that it isn't a healthy thing to do for children of Morpheus." His eyebrow quirked up in that annoying way that meant he knew you were doing something you shouldn't be doing.

You raised your own eyebrow in response. "Charity t-t-tell you that?"

"Rex, if you'd believe it. He's actually quite concerned about you."

Hearing that, you stilled. Rex was concerned? You didn't think that what you do every day would worry him so much.

"And," Will continued, "I can see why. You were pretty far gone. It took several minutes of shaking and snapping my fingers in your face to rouse you."

You stared at him indifferently. What he said didn't trouble you. That was exactly what normally happened when you got caught up in memories. It was no different in this case. "That's normal. B-But if you're so worried, then d-d-do you have a better way to make use of mmmy time?"

His mouth stretched into a grin. Oh no, you thought, dread seeping into your stomach. You didn't think he would actually have an answer.

"Well, I think it's time you get back into camp activities." You tried to protest. He kept talking. "As far as I can tell, your hands are perfectly fine. In fact, your whole upper body seems to be doing great. So, I talked to Chiron." He picked up your crutches and handed them to you with a large smile. "Have fun in Arts and Crafts."

(~)

"We have a bunch of things here for anybody who comes in! There's sculpting, which we have real marble and sharpened tools for, though it's a long process and we usually don't recommend it to newbies. Drawing, of course, is a classic. We have all the mediums you could ask for- pencil, graphite, chalk, charcoal, ink. Ooh, there's tons of paint too, like acrylic, watercolour, oil paint, airbrush, gouache, pretty much everything. Weaving is a favourite of the Athena kids, but that takes a certain skill that not everybody has. Oh! Ceramics is always fun-"

This. Was. Torture. Why would Will ever think that arts and crafts was the way to reinstate you into normal life at camp? You couldn't remember the last time you picked up a pencil and drew a sheep, let alone tried to sculpt. Your creativity levels were off the charts, and by off the charts you meant so low they were nonexistent.

"-all types of yarn, which are naturally dyed, by the way! So you don't have to worry if we use chemicals if you're allergic or something, since it's all organic. The corner over there is meant for architecture, which we added in ever since Annabeth was asked to redesign Olympus. You wouldn't believe the amount of people who wanted to try their hand at designing landscapes and buildings after that! So yeah, there's always that-"

You stifled a groan. You were being led around the Arts & Crafts building by this bubbly Demeter girl who would not stop talking. She probably hadn't taken a breath in the past seven sentences. Her quick, chipper voice was beginning to give you a migraine. You appreciated the effort to get you engaged, but all you wanted to do was be given a pencil and paper and left alone to do your own thing.

You couldn't take it anymore, and interrupted her in the middle of her sentence. "You know what? I think I'll stick to the b-b-basics for... now. C-C-Could I just draw with a pencil?"

The momentary surprise of being cut off disappeared and she shot you a dazzling smile. "Sure thing! You could just sit over there and I'll set you up with the supplies in a few minutes."

"Great, thanks." You hobbled over to the desk and made yourself comfortable. True to her word, the girl brought over the materials a few minutes later.

"Let me know if you need anything else. I'll be over by the sculpting section, 'kay?" You nodded and she bounced away, finally leaving you alone.

Staring at the paper, you made no move to pick up the pencil provided. Like you said, you weren't creative in the slightest. What was there to draw?

A minute passed. You sighed. This was boring as hell. Picking up the pencil, you flipped it around your finger, looking around the room for inspiration. Nothing popped out at you. Eventually, your gaze returned to your hand spinning the pencil. A thought struck the back of your mind. You remembered how you felt under the tree, hours before Will found you. The strange thoughts you had had jumped around in your mind. Above anything else, you were confused and weirded out by them. Why on Olympus were you wondering whether or not you were real? It was a stupid thought. You quickly dismissed it, however, assuming it had something to do with the memory you were thinking of. Your brain did strange things when you were lost in thought, after all.

Another minute passed. Still nothing on the paper.

A few minutes later, and Karlee, the girl, ventured back to where you were sitting. Her smile faltered slightly when she saw your blank page, then grew back full force. "Having trouble thinking of something to draw?"

You shrugged. "I'm just n-n-not an artsy t-t-type of person."

"Well, I could help you, if you wanted."

There was nothing more you wanted than for her to leave you alone. But then you looked at her bright eyes and happy grin, and felt ashamed for wanting to crush her lively spirit, just because you were feeling bitter at Will. Plus, now that you think about it, she wasn't acting any differently towards you. She wasn't acting like you were (Y/N), the girl who faced Tartarus. She was acting like you were any other camper who was forced into the arts and crafts building. She was acting like you were (Y/N), child of Morpheus and avid Pegasus rider. She was acting like you were you. The least you could do was accept the help she had been generously giving you this entire time.

You looked her right in those shining blue eyes of hers and smiled, shifting over to the side to let her sit. "Actually, yeah, that would b-b-be great."

Oh dear lord I did not realise how long it had been. Does time fly by quickly for anyone else? I've had this chapter written for a long time, but I guess I forgot to post it. I'll definitely set a reminder for next week.

What do you guys think about the whole reality spiel? Do you think it's actually something serious, a new problem she might be facing? Or do you think it's nothing and just an effect she has always been facing because of her fatal flaw? Either one is entirely possible.

My story kind of reminds me of Julius Caesar, the play, in the sense where one of the main characters isn't actually a main character. Caesar had basically no lines compared to Brutus, like how Percy, the love interest, has only been shown for like a chapter. But they're both there in spirit.