By the time Raven came out of her meditative state it was already dark outside, she could tell by the lack of light that was seeping underneath her door. Stretching herself out on her bed, she sighed deeply. That was exactly what she had needed and she felt ten times better, although the thought of her and Beast Boy still played on her mind. She needed to not think about it for her own sanity.

Standing up she flicked her wrist, turning on a dim lamp that sat on the other side of the room. She walked over to her dresser, looking down at the clock that sat there. It read 11:52pm; she had been mediating for almost 8 hours. She had definitely needed it.

Feeling her stomach growl, she sat there for a moment, debating if she was brave enough to venture out of her room and get food. She hadn't eaten since Robin's breakfast and she supposed it wouldn't hurt. Besides there was a good chance that everyone would either be asleep or in their own rooms settling down for the night. After about one minute or so she decided that food was definitely what she wanted and she opened a portal leading to the kitchen, just in case. She stepped through it, a cold chill falling over her as she quickly passed through the unknown. Once she was in the kitchen she shivered, trying to shake the cold off of her, before walking to the fridge. From the living room she could hear the TV playing, letting her know that someone was either still awake or had fallen asleep in front of it. She would have to be quiet so as to not draw attention to herself.

Grabbing some pasta sauce from the fridge and placing it on the counter, she quickly filled a pot with water and put it on the stove, cranking the heat as far as it would go, then she took down some dry pasta, making sure to keep her subconscious attention on the living room. She was positive the being on the couch was Cyborg, which she didn't mind too much. Even though the big goof did annoy her sometimes with his loud way of speech, he usually kept out of her way, unlike the rest of her teammates. Not that any of them necessarily bothered her, but they could be…abrasive.

The water began to boil and Raven dropped the pasta in, careful not to splash herself. Something cold and smooth brushed across her left foot and she jumped back, almost letting out a scream. She looked down to see Silkie crawling in circles around her feet, his mouth gapping like a fish out of water. She frowned, her shoulders slumping.

"Didn't Starfire feed you?" she asked, squatting herself down closer to the floor. The grub stood up at her knee, its pointy legs clawing at her through her sweatpants. Quickly she brushed him away with her hand. She had never been a big fan of their larva pet, and she absolutely hated when he touched her. She stood back up and decided to ignore him. There was no way Starfire would have forgotten to feed her precious companion. He was just being a bum.

A rough snore gargled from the living room, proving Raven's theory that it was Cyborg who was in there. Quickly giving her pasta a stir she tiptoed to the door frame a peered out. Sure enough he was sitting on the couch, head leaning back, eyes closed and mouth wide open with a slight trace of drool slivering down his jawbone. She couldn't help but smile.

When her pasta was done she quickly drained it, threw it on a plate and drowned it in tomato sauce before sitting down at the table. She sat in silence while she ate, her mind bouncing back and forth between the grub that was still annoyingly rubbing against her legs, the snoring from the other room and the events from the other night. She knew she had promised herself to try her best to not think about it, but her wondering thoughts couldn't help it. She kept imagining their talk on the roof and pressing her lips to his and asking to go to his room. She shifted uncomfortably in her chair as her imagination trapped her.

What had it felt like to have him guide her to his room?

What sounds did she make when he had kissed her neck and ran his hands all over her?

Did his fangs hurt when he nipped at her skin? Had he been gentle or did his rough, animal instincts take over?

Raven felt a slight ping in her lower abdomen and the lights of the kitchen flickered. She looked up, realizing she was getting carried away. She shouldn't have been thinking these thoughts anyway. She was not interested in Beast Boy. It was just her raging hormonal body that was trying to do her in, and she wouldn't allow it.

When she finished her food, she rinsed off her plate and reopened the portal to her bedroom, stepping through and closing it quickly before Silkie could follow her through. Her room was dark as usual but she found her way to her bed no problem. She was going to try her best to sleep away her lingering anxieties. However, when she crawled onto her bed, readying herself to get under the covers, her hand brushed against something furry and warm. She immediately retreated to a standing position again and leaned her body to the side, stretching her arm to feel for the lamp on her bedside table. She found the switch no problem and pulled it. The dim lamp flicked on, and the small green cat that was sitting on Raven's bed clenched its eyes shut, shying away from the sudden change.

Why wasn't Raven surprised?

"Why are you in my room?" she asked, monotone. She was too tired to even be annoyed. The cat stood up and walked over to the edge of the bed, its long tail swishing behind it, its green eyes focused on her.

"Raven, we need to talk about last night." Beast Boy said, his voice the most serious Raven had ever heard it. She crossed her arms over her chest.

"I thought I told you not to bring it up again."

"I tried, but I-"

"It hasn't even been twelve hours. That's not trying. Now leave, I'm going to bed."

Raven bent forward and picked up the cat, turned to her side and tossing him at the floor. He landed on all fours before turning back into a human so quickly that if you had blinked you would have missed it. He turned to face her, watching as she climbed into her bed.

"I'm serious, Rae. Can we please talk about it? Please? It's driving me crazy to just ignore it." He began to beg, something she hated. She rolled her eyes.

"Beast Boy, it was a drunken mistake. One I really, really want to forget about. What is there to talk about?"

Beast Boy walked forward and sat on her bed, looking down at her, the mattress sinking slightly at the sudden weight change. She swallowed, feeling slightly uncomfortable with him on her bed, so close to her; especially since she still hadn't fully recovered from her thoughts in the kitchen. He looked at her sternly.

"It was more than that Rae. I know it, and I think you do too, you're just too afraid to admit it. The stuff you told me on the roof, that stuff felt real, like it was from your heart."

What the hell had she said?

"And do you really think you're the kind of girl who would just drop your pants for any guy, even if you were drunk? Because you don't really strike me as someone like that. Also, Robin and Cyborg were there flirting with girls too. Hell, Robin and Starfire are dating but you didn't get upset at that. It was only when Wonder Girl started getting touchy feely with me that you got pissed and stormed off. Why is that Rae?"

Raven didn't say anything. He wasn't…wrong, with anything that he was saying. For the first time ever, Beast Boy was talking sense. She would ignore the lack of class, but he was right, she wouldn't have gotten jealous of Robin and Cyborg flirting with other women because frankly there was just no spark between them. As much as she hated to admit it there was something between her and the changeling, even if it was only her adolescent body yearning for his touch.

He waited for a moment for her to answer, but he got none so he continued with an awkward throat clearing. "I…I have liked you for a while Raven…" his voice trailed off, killing a part of her. Her violet eyes dropped to look at her hands that were resting in front of her. God…a confession was the last thing she wanted, especially because she had no idea what to say in response. She felt awkward and wanted nothing more than to open a portal into another universe and disappear forever. "I think I've known ever since that Malchior dude hurt you…I was so angry when he did that to you, and I-"

"Beast Boy…just stop talking and please…just leave." She demanded abruptly, cutting him off. He looked at her. She had no idea what to say or do, but she could already feel her cheeks burning and her stomach twisting in on itself. If she rejected him now it would break his heart, and though she did care about that, there was something else deep within her that was keeping her from doing it as well. She absolutely didn't know how to answer his question, she didn't know how to respond to his confession, she felt completely at a loss and awkward. She just wanted him to leave and never bring this up again like she had originally asked. For the sake of God why couldn't he have just done that in the first place, why was he like this.

Beast Boy's eyes furrowed and he stared at her for a minute before straightening his usually slumped shoulders and slowly leaning forward. She looked at him again and internally panicked when she realized he was getting closer to her, his eyes dropped to look at her lips. She froze.

Oh God.

He was going to kiss her.

Raven's heart began hammering as she felt his warm breath against her face, but she didn't move. She watched him carefully, his eyes going back and forth from her eyes to her lips, trying to read the situation and see if she was going to let him continue.

Was she?

Was that what was happening?

She wasn't moving, or protesting. Her body was betraying her. Beast Boy inched even closer to her until their noses were ghosting against one another. He was so close that her vision burned her eyes and she closed them. She could feel herself shaking. She had no idea why she wasn't saying anything. Beast Boy inhaled and tilted his head to the side, pressing his lips to hers. It felt strange to her, foreign. His lips were much softer than she had imagined them to be, despite the slight poke she was feeling from his bottom fang. But it wasn't unpleasant. They stayed like that for a moment and she wondered if he could feel her heart beating through the touch of her lips. She hoped not.

Beast Boy pulled away and Raven opened her eyes, a bit confused that it was already over. A light blush fell over his green cheeks.

"You can't tell me you didn't feel anyth-"

Raven's hand moved on its own and bolted to press her index finger against his lips. "Stop talking." She repeated, but her tone was hushed and much gentler than it had been before. Her mouth felt dry, and she had no idea what she was doing. She couldn't have a relationship; the last time she had tried it had broken her and sent her emotions into a wildfire of a mess. And with Beast Boy it was different. First of all, they had very little in common, in fact, he wasn't her type in the least, and she worried that it was only her attraction for his appearance, which she was embarrassed to say attracted her, that was tricking her into thinking she had feelings for him. But on the contrary, she did care very deeply for him and he seemed to be one of the only Titans, other than Robin who truly understood how she felt. She was confused, and she now knew that he liked her. Would leading him on really be a good idea if her feelings weren't sincere? But in this moment she wanted more, she wanted to test her own limits, and he was here in front of her.

Raven lowered her hand down his face and then onto his chest where it lingered there, pressing against his firm muscles. The pounding that she could feel in her groin was hard to ignore, and so was the blood pumping through her veins. That's why it took everything in her power to lower her hand and turn her gaze away. "Just leave."

Beast Boy stayed quiet and even though Raven refused to look at him, she could only imagine his hurt expression. He leaned away from her.

"Okay then…sorry to bother you. Night…" He said in a whisper before morphing into a snake and slithering away, squeezing himself under her door. Raven sat there looking down, she felt miserable. It was true that every girl, and boy for that matter, her age didn't completely understand their feelings, especially when it came to romantic ones. But for her it was dangerous to not understand them, and that was what was keeping her at bay. She couldn't jeopardize her, or Beast Boys safety or friendship just to see if what she felt for him was real.

She wouldn't.

And it killed her.

Sucking back a sob that desperately wanted to fight its way up her throat, Raven leaned towards her table and pulled the light switch, making the room pitch black once again.