Note: Sorry for that long break, but I couldn't find the time to write something. Also, I tried to figure out where I want to take this story, so it took me a while. I hope I didn't write Jane and Lisbon OOC, but honestly – I didn't plan to make this story that long, so it may be a little messy. Just bear with me, ok? Reviews are more than welcomed. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own The Mentalist.

Oranges. A lot of juicy, fresh oranges hanging on the branches, which almost created a green rooftop above her head. She walked barefoot between two rows of trees, blinded by the rising sun. Her feet were wet from dew. A brisk sea breeze played with her ivory sundress and that unique salty scent entered her nose.

She was amazed by the ravishing beauty of that garden. It felt like paradise. She stopped to pick an orange from the nearest branch and then, as she turned her head, she saw him.

He sat on the grass, leaning against a trunk, head tilted back. Rays of light hit his face and made his hair shine like pure gold. He was smiling faintly and looking directly at her. She could see in his blue eyes a hint of an unfamiliar feeling. She hadn't seen it before. What was it? Amusement?

In a split second after their gaze met, a sudden gust of wind hit her and made her hair flow in different directions. She tried to tie a ponytail, but the wind was too strong.

What was that look in his eyes? What was it? If only she could see him one more time.

The wind grew more and more boisterous, until she couldn't see or hear anything.

Then, she opened her eyes. And she saw him, but this time his eyes were closed and he was fast asleep. She couldn't tell if she was still dreaming because the sunlight made his skin glow exactly like in that garden.

He looked serene. Not troubled by anything. Not analyzing everything and everyone, not plotting against people, not dealing with his demons. Just asleep. Dreaming, probably.

"I hope his dreams are as beautiful as mine", she thought, taking in every feature of his face. She noticed how well-rested and relaxed he seemed, so different from what he usually looked like at work.

"For once he won't be tired. This insomnia has to make him go insane at night".

She gently caressed his cheek, which was a little rough from his five-o-clock shadow. As she was about to move her hand away, he clasped it with his own, not letting her go. This sudden movement made her heart skip a beat.

- Hi. - She whispered, smiling.

- Mhmm... - He mumbled. Still half-asleep, he put his arms around her and pulled her closer to him.

- Did you sleep well?

- I always sleep well when you're around. Even on that awful couch of yours at the CBI. - He answered honestly, without even a slight hint of cockiness, which she'd expected. - Weird, isn't it?

- Yeah...

- What have you dreamt about this time? - He asked, finally opening his eyes. The light made them an even more exquisite shade of blue.

- A garden full of orange trees. Sunrise... - She started, trying to remember everything. - Me barefoot in a light dress, which is weird, because I can't remember the last time I wore one -

- The Doverton case. - He mentioned immediately. - You wore a black dress to that charity event.

His answer made her speachless. She just laid there with her mouth open, a hint of smile in the corners of her eyes.

- Did you waste a room in your memory palace just to remember this? - She finally spoke.

- Obviously.

They both chuckled.

- So, back to your dream...

- Right. - She closed her eyes, struggling a bit to picture that scenery. - I was in a dress. It was somewhere near a shore. I turned to pick an orange and then I saw you. You were sitting against a tree, looking at me. Then the wind started to blow and I couldn't see you anymore, because hair were covering my face. I... I wanted to look at you to check something, but... I can't remember what it was.

- Interesting.

- Maybe I'll remember it later. - She said hopefully.

They cuddled in silence for a bit, lost in their own thoughts and still a little sleepy. Jane noticed that his heart hadn't beaten that calmly in a long time.

- I like how the sun hits your face. - He whispered, playing with her hair.

- This golden sunlight makes anything look more beautiful than it actually is. It's a weird illusion. Like, for a couple of minutes right after the day starts and right before it ends, everything has it's time to shine. Even a bag of trash or an old house.

- You don't think you're beautiful? - He said more than asked.

- W-well... I'm obviously not Kate Moss - She tried to look for the right words, as Jane's statement caught her off-guard. She hadn't really cared about her appearance, being too practical and busy to care about what to wear. On a daily basis she tried not to notice early wrinkles on her forehead or dark circles under her eyes.

- You really don't! - He exclaimed, completely taken-aback. - Lisbon, you have no idea-

- You don't have to do that, Jane. - She awkwardly cut him off. - I'm hungry. Let me go make some breakfast. I'll be right back.

In a matter of seconds, she was gone. "What's wrong with me? What's going on?", she thought as she put on the kettle. That look in his eyes... Just like in her dream. She still couldn't tell what it really was, but it was so intense and sincere that it made her uncomfortable. She realized what was really happening: her and Jane, lying together in her bed, cuddling. Him telling her how beautiful she was would be too much. So much had changed in their relationship during those past two days that she had no time to think it all through. They went on a date, kissed a couple of times, even slept in the same bed.

Then, the weight of their situation hit her and her breath quickened. "What are we doing? It's not right. It's irresponsible. It's... terrifying".

She made some sandwiches, tea for him and coffee for herself. She carried it back to her bedroom, trying to control her shaking hands and not to spill anything.

- Here. - She said, handing him the cup and faking her smile. She wanted to scream.

- Thanks.

Lisbon sat on the other side of the bed and put a plate with sandwiches between them. She was staring into her cup, trying to ignore Jane's intense stare. "He knows".

- Ok, what's going on? - He finally spoke, shifting into more comfortable position. - Did I say something wrong?

- No! - She burst, forcing herself to look at him. - No, of course not... I just...

Once again, she was lost for words. She didn't want to hurt him. Only two days ago he stood there in her living room, broken to pieces, crying uncontrollably. And now he was finally at peace.

When she dared to look into his eyes, she felt an immediate wave of heat come to her cheeks.

- Be honest with me, Teresa.

There was no turning back.

- I'm scared. - As she mumbled it, tears appeared in her eyes. She quickly wiped them away. - Damn it... I'm sorry, Jane, I just...

- Just say it. - He said firmly. Under his intense gaze, she almost forgot how to breathe. When she finally spoke, words became one incoherent mumble. She just wanted to take everything off of her chest.

- I can't do it. We can't do it. We've been reckless this whole time. I mean, don't get me wrong, I've enjoyed every moment with you. Damn it, this weekend has been the best thing that has happened to me in a really long time. I want to be with you, but most importantly – I want you to be happy. To have your closure. To not be broken anymore. But so many consequences come with that and it terrifies me. It literally makes me sick to think about what could go wrong if we continue this.

- Teresa...

- Please, let me finish. - She said desperately, feeling tears come down her cheeks. - Since I opened that door time has stopped in place. It felt like there's only the two of us and our feelings for each other, but just before I went to the kitchen, I saw something in your eyes that made me realize that we're not alone. There's CBI, crimes, Red John... Your past... There are so many things that stand against us being together that trying to forget anything ever happened seems more possible. I know you said to just enjoy the moment, but I can't. All I can think of right now is what will happen when we come close to catching Red John.

As she finished that last sentence, she took a deep breath in. They both sat there, taking in her words, not even looking at each other. A plate of sandwiches between them. The heavy silence in the bedroom was suddenly disrupted by her sob.

- It's my fault... - She cried. - I shouldn't have kissed you. I took advantage of you. And now... Oh God, I'm so sorry... It's all my fault.

- No. - He breathed, staring blankly at a tree outside the window. - It's nobody's fault. It just happened.

After her weeping stopped, Jane finally looked at her. She was curled up at the corner of the bed, picking the edge of her jersey and occasionally tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. He felt empty inside. He should've known better.

They sat in silence, both heartbroken and lost. The sun had finally risen and the golden sunlight was gone.

For once in a long time, Jane didn't know what to do. Maybe it was him who took advantage of her? Maybe he'd been selfish and had thought only about himself? Did he even love her? Was it really love? Or just comfort? There were so many questions running through his mind and he couldn't help but doubt everything that he'd done.

- We're both pretty messed up, aren't we? - She smiled sadly.

- Yeah...

He looked into her eyes and immediately felt a chill run down his spine. The shadow appeared again.

- Do you love me? - She whispered, not looking away even for a moment.

- I don't know anymore.

She nodded and stood up.

- I'm going to take a shower. Close the front door on your way out.