"Connor … Connor."
Connor's eyes flew open at Jude's frantic whisper. Wrong. Something had to be wrong. They were in his bed, it was morning. Had Dad come home early?
"Connor, look."
Connor turned his head to the side to see Jellybean sitting near Jude's head, sniffing his hairline.
"I think she likes you now, Jude."
"She's pulling my hair."
"It means she definitely likes you."
"I'm … glad she does," Jude whispered. He reached his hand up and Jellybean watched very movement he made. "Can I pet you now?"
Connor almost held his breath until Jellybean settled down under Jude's hand, letting him gently scratch behind her ears. It was funny to watch how awkward Jude was with Jellybean but he also really liked it.
"I think I like cats," Jude mused, his hand on the back of her head.
"Good, that's a requirement you have to have for us being friends."
"I didn't know that," Jude said. "I don't know if I would have passed that when we first met. I think you're the first cat I've met, Jellybean."
She tilted her head toward him and he scratched her ears.
"I'm scared of hurting her," Jude confessed to Connor. "She looks old."
"She is old but she's tough. Dad says I used to drag her around by her ears when I was little but I don't believe it. I don't think Mom would have let any kid abuse an animal."
Jude bit his lip and Connor's hand clenched around his sheets. "Um. Are you hungry? I know you said you want to be out of here before Dad got home."
"Yeah, let's make breakfast," Jude agreed. As they sat up, Jude added, "Your house makes me not want to go back to mine."
"You can always come here. Whenever you want."
"It wouldn't make my guardian happy," Jude admitted.
Connor frowned and followed Jude down the stairs. "But she let you come here."
"Well, she doesn't know," Jude said. "Other things came up and I realized she wouldn't notice if I was here and so I didn't ask."
"Oh," Connor replied. "No one knows you're here?"
"Nope. So, if you want to kill me, now is your chance."
Connor laughed awkwardly. "Jude, it took me fifteen years to make one friend. What am I going to do if I kill you?"
"You've had friends before me," Jude said. "You'd probably make one again."
"Probably," Connor agreed, "but no friends like you."
"None as dumb as me," Jude agreed.
"Don't underestimate yourself," Connor said. "What beginner reader could get through To Kill A Mockingbird?"
Jude pulled a face as Connor piled things for French toast on the table.
"Well, I'm not through it yet."
"You will be," Connor said. "By the time we get near the end, you won't need me to help you with the rest."
"I'll still read it to you. It wouldn't feel right to not to."
Connor managed a weak smile, wondering how long it would take Jude to get to the end, wondering how long it would be before Jude realized he probably wouldn't get to hear it. He kept his thoughts to himself. It wasn't time yet.
"I've never made French Toast," Jude confessed. "I'm not sure what I'm doing with the ingredients."
"Oh, let me look it up," Connor said, reaching for his phone.
He propped his phone up on the counter so that he and Jude could both see the screen and then they started working away. After two days, they had figured out. They could work in tandem and work as a team and Connor really liked it. He wasn't sure he had ever been so in sync with anyone before. Not his mother, not his father, not any of his friends from his former life. Jellybean, maybe, but he wasn't sure that she counted this time. At any rate, Jude was the only human that he had ever felt this way with and it paid off, in Connor's opinion, since the French toast was the best he'd ever had. No exaggeration, even though Jude accused him of doing exactly that.
Between cooking and eating, it was time for Jude to go before Connor was ready for it to be.
"See you on Tuesday?" Jude asked, his bag on his shoulder and his shoes on his feet.
Connor nodded. "If I survive Michael and Mary."
"I'll come early, help you fight them off."
"Knock on wood we won't get there," Connor said, rapping his knuckles on the doorframe. "Thanks for staying with me this weekend. I don't know what I'd do without you here."
"Sleep more comfortably, probably."
"Maybe. Jellybean wants her spot back but I really didn't mind at all."
Jude nodded and Connor wondered what he was thinking. He could imagine Jude brushing him off if he asked and so Connor held his tongue. He didn't think Jude was a liar but he knew that there were things Jude would never tell him and he was almost glad for it; they were the same that way.
"I should go," Jude said.
"Get home safe."
"It's the middle of the day."
"Bad things happen all the time."
Connor could tell from the look on Jude's face that he had managed to surprise him.
"What's the worst thing that's ever happened to you?" Jude asked.
"Would you answer that question?"
Jude paused and then shook his head. "You know, I liked being here with you this weekend."
"I liked you here too. Maybe Dad will go away again and you can come hang out. Or you can hang out with him here. He really won't mind."
"No? Grubby kid with blue hair?"
"No," Connor assured him. Dad would probably just be glad that he had a friend and if Dad did get sour about anything, Connor would remind him of that fact. "No, he wouldn't."
"Well, maybe. I'll have to get up my courage first."
"I thought you were dangerous."
"I'm more of a danger magnet," Jude snorted. "Okay, I've really got to go. I don't want to meet your dad today."
"Okay," Connor agreed, feeling like he should hug Jude or something. He was sure Jude wouldn't accept it. He was sure that it would be too gay for Jude. The words bit at him and he tried to push that out of his mind too. He couldn't let himself dwell on it, otherwise he knew he'd feel different about Jude. He and Jude had gone through different things – Jude had valid reasons for saying what he did, or, at least, as far as he had explained that he did. Connor had to accept it. He really didn't think that Jude was malicious. He didn't think Jude hated any part of him. "See you Tuesday."
"See you Tuesday."
Jude slipped out the door and Connor was alone. He turned and pick up Jellybean, going to the side living room window to watch Jude head down the street, staring after him until he was long out of sight. With a sigh, he scratched the top of her head and thought about how he had to move. He should do dishes but he was tired. He didn't want to have to stretch to the cupboards to put the plates away. He –
He had forgotten his meds. He had done exactly what his father was afraid of. He was hours behind and he wondered why the pain hadn't set in yet. It might be good news, it might be bad news, it might be nothing but luck. Connor carefully put Jellybean on the couch and then he ran as quickly as he could, his fingers shaking as he reached for the bottles on the shelf. Dad would be home soon and he would have to confess he had forgotten, if he wasn't curled up on the floor in so much pain that his father immediately knew. It wasn't easy to take his medication with the lump in his throat but he forced himself through it, and then he went and sat on the couch. He didn't think he had ever been late with them before and he didn't know what would happen.
He threaded his fingers through Jellybean's fur. It would be fine. It would be fine. It would be fine.
(-.-)
Jude crept up the attic stairs. He hadn't heard anything when he'd snuck through the main floor. He was going to be fine; he was going to get away with it. Callie wouldn't be home for a while, he'd have time to adjust to all of the thought in his head, she would never expect a thing. It was best case scenario. Jude adjusted his bag over his shoulder and pushed his door open.
"Where have you been?"
Callie was home. Jude didn't even have a lie prepared.
"Why are you here?"
Callie crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him. "It's early for you to be up and out somewhere."
"Maybe I just didn't feel comfortable without you here."
Callie didn't appreciate the words. "You hide up here when I'm gone, Jude. You don't even go to the Centre. Also, I got home last night. Do you know how worried I was? I thought they had killed you or something."
"Couldn't have been too worried or we still wouldn't be living here," Jude muttered.
"I belong to him for our protection," Callie said and the words fell too heavy against Jude.
"I know."
"So, where were you?"
"I was with a friend."
"The boy?"
"If you don't ask, I won't tell, but you have nothing to worry about, I promise. It's not what you're thinking."
"What if it is?"
"Trust me," Jude said. "Please, just trust me, for once."
"I don't think you should have this particular friend."
Jude's heart hurt. He wanted to always have this particular friend. "No, you can't tell me that."
"Jude! That wasn't a question."
"Are you ordering me around?" Jude demanded and before he knew it, he and Callie were in each other's face.
"I'm protecting you!" Callie cried, jabbing Jude in the chest. "And you're just too naïve to figure out what from!"
"They beat me! I know what's going on! But you can't tell me what to do or not to do! I can make my own decisions!"
"They're going to kill you!"
"Maybe you should have thought about that before you brought me here and put me in danger!"
Callie punched him in the face; his cheekbone ached. Jude brought one hand up to his skin and stared at her. She had been violent before but was never quite so violent.
"Do you like it or something?" Callie asked, her face dead, none of her usual guilt after she hit him. "Is that what you want? Do you want them to do it again?"
"Callie –"
She grabbed his arm and Jude didn't even think to stop her because he was supposed to trust her. She was supposed to be his protector and his everything. And then she hit him again in nearly the exact same spot. His lip quivered and he straightened up. He was going to grow a spine.
"Callie, enough."
Her jaw was set and he realized that she didn't care anymore and that almost broke his heart.
"You're turning into the people you wanted to save me from!" Jude shouted.
She shoved him back into the wall. "Don't you dare!"
"Don't you dare! Leave me alone!"
Jude escaped into their bedroom and forced the door shut, sitting back against her. He didn't think that she would. In fact, he hoped she wouldn't. He hoped that she was sitting on the other side of the door, filled with guilt and remorse. He wanted her to feel bad and he wanted her to feel sorry because he didn't know what to think if she didn't feel that way. He couldn't picture Callie honestly not caring because Callie loved him. Callie was always supposed to be the one who loved him. It was the code he had lived his life by and, sometimes, it was the only thing left that he could truly trust in. Everything would be fine because Callie loved him and wanted to protect him and would protect him. That was what was true.
Jude had never considered a future where he might not think that it was true or it might not actually be true. He and Callie were always supposed to have each other. But if she kept hitting him, if things kept breaking down, then what did he do? Where did he go? Without Callie, who would he be? How could he be? He wrapped his arms around himself. Would he ever really be without Callie? Would she turn him away, could she? Didn't she love him? He loved her. Did she know that?
Jude tilted his head back until it thudded against the door and he reached his fingers up to touch his skin. His cheek felt hot and stretched under the bottom of his eye. It was going to bruise. He knew what bruises felt like. And, for the first time, he wondered what someone else was going to think of it. He couldn't hide from Connor and he couldn't hide it from Connor. He could hide in the house, as he always had done with injuries, but he didn't want to spend that much time with Callie, if he were being honest, and he didn't feel like he could give up being around Connor. He had a point to his sister, now. He and Connor were friends and Jude was going to keep it that way. Even with no badgering or bullying from Callie, Jude had been intending on keeping it that way. She had nothing to worry about. He was the one who should be concerned and he was the one who was dealing with those concerns.
"Jude," Callie called. "Can I come in?"
No, Jude thought but he just stayed still, listening intently. Callie remained on the other side of the door for a few long minutes and then she sighed.
"Later, then. We'll talk later, then."
She left him alone and Jude pulled his legs up to his chest.
Alone was the last thing he wanted to be.
So, on tumblr I'm: we are all of legend now (with dashes between every word). If you want to find my replies to anon reviews, add backslash tagged backslash anon dash replies. If you want to see anything I post about The Island Of Misfit Toys, go to my tumblr URL and add backslash tagged backslash the dash island dash of dash misfit dash toys. Punctuation is spelled out due to Fanfiction's restrictions. If you're having any trouble accessing the tumblr content please send me a pm and I can format it for you in a different way.
~TLL~