Hello my fellow readers!
Here's another funny chapter for all of you enjoy.
"Sing to Me" belongs to Evanescence.
Rayne's POV
"I cannot believe I got invited to this damn thing" I told the Fate's as I watched Hercules talk with Merv Griffin. "The four of us already know that my mate is going to take over the show"
"Well you are friends with Hercules now and the whole points is for you to get close to him" Lachesis stated as I turned to her and her sisters.
"I have the feeling you three had something to do with this" I growled.
The three of them chuckled just as Merv suddenly called out my name.
"Ladies and Gentlemen now it's time to meet another one of young Hercules's friends Ms. Rayne Johnson!"
I sighed and I walked on stage just as the Fate's disappeared. The crowd applauded as I walked past Merv and took a seat on the couch between Hercules and Icarus.
"Welcome Rayne it's a pleasure to finally meet you" Merv started.
"Same here Merv" I replied. "When I first found out I was invited I was kind of shocked"
"So is that your natural hair color?" Merv asked. "Because it's unique and very pretty"
I blushed at the griffin's compliment.
"Yes this is my natural hair color as are the blue streaks"
"Man I would love to have your hair color Rayne" Icarus said with a sigh.
"Well yours got styled like that since you flew too close to the sun" Hercules pointed out.
"True and I intend to keep it styled like this it helps get the ladies"
I chuckled at Icarus' statement before some clips of myself started to play. The first clip was me slapping Adonis across the face which got everyone to laugh. Two more clips featured Adonis in them one where he tried to get me to help with finals and the other when I told Helen about Adonis trying to ask me out to the prom. When Alduin appeared in some of the clips my best friend whistled from the audience. Cassandra sat beside him and she looked like she was having a good time. The last clip was me playing at the Drama Festival.
"I wish I was there to see you singing" Merv stated as my clips finished. "I've heard your voice is good"
"You're sweet Merv but I'm not that good like Orpheus" I confessed. "He actually played at the prom"
"Which Hades tried to crash" Hercules added.
"Ooh you tangled with the fearsome Hades?" Merv asked. "That must have been scary"
"He has more experience with Hades than I do" I said pointing to Herc as clips of Hades started to play.
"No way Herc eats that guy for breakfast just look at how many times he's burned Hades" Icarus said.
A clip from the Drama Festival showed Icarus handing over the Cronus Stone mask to Hercules as Hades flared up. I held back a laugh as Hercules threw the mask and it landed right in Hades' face making my mate fall onto his back. Clips from Pool Party, the Prom, Hecate's Underworld Takeover, and several other funny ones played.
"Oh please look at that jerk" Icarus said. "Please he's not scared of anybody"
"You know Merv he's not as tough as he looks" Hercules told the talk show host.
"That's because he looks like a nincompoop" the griffin said.
Underworld
Pain and Panic laughed after they heard Merv Griffin call the boss a nincompoop. The imps and Hades were watching the Merv Griffin Show on what Hades used as a television.
"That's funny" Panic began. "The boss is a big nincompoop"
Hades turned orange in anger and he grabbed the imps into his hands and tossed them towards the television bubble. They flew right through it before it disappeared. Pain and Panic grunted as they hit the wall and slid down to the floor.
"He thinks he can make a monkey out of me huh?!" Hades ranted.
"Actually I think the word was nincompoop" Pain told the boss.
"I know what it was thank you" Hades growled telling the imps. "Come on boys Merv doesn't know it but he's about to be canceled"
Rayne's POV
"Ooh he certainly deserved that one" Merv said as we watched Hades get fried with a lightning bolt from Zeus.
"He usually does" Herc agreed.
"Now hey wait a minute" I interrupted. I got everyone's attention. "Yeah Hades maybe evil but he's also funny, I mean come on whenever he goes into a fiery rampage it's hard not to laugh at"
"I would have to agree" Icarus said. "The Lord of the Dead is funny when he gets angry"
"It sounds like you two like him" Merv suggested.
I only shrugged and said.
"I'm just pointing out what's true"
We all then continued to watch the clips until Icarus said.
"Fascinating extraordinary footage really one of a kind"
"WILL YOU CUT THAT OUT?!" Merv scolded Icarus. "This isn't your show it's mine"
"Correction!" Hades' voice interrupted.
"Oh boy" I muttered to myself as the clip reel suddenly burned away.
"Hades is in the house!"
My mate then appeared and immediately Hermes flew over to him.
"Hey! Clear out Cat! This is our gig!"
Hades turned to the Messenger of the Gods and smirked.
"Oi, the lounge loser and his lingo like beat it cat!" Hades then used his flames to shoot Hermes out of the show.
"Hey Jerkules guess what? New flash you've been bumped!" Hades glided over to Hercules and used his body to send Herc flying into the sky.
"You can't take my show away like this!" Merv snapped. Hades only ignored him as chains surrounded him and Icarus.
"That's right mister you're in for a butt kicking" Icarus began but Pain and Panic tied a scarf around his mouth so he wouldn't talk.
"Put a cork in it" Hades growled before he turned to the audience. "Athens! Get ready babies! Because now I'm two hip, I can't stay, I almost gotta go, but I'm here!"
I placed a hand onto my mouth to hold back my laughter while the opening credits were being played.
"And now here's Hades!"
The crowd began to boo as Hades came back onstage. The whole background had the Underworld theme going on.
"Alright welcome to the show! Let me say how great it is to be here! I haven't had this much fun since I helped my friend the Cyclops shop for bifocals, Bada-Bing! Bada-Boom!"
Hades then transported himself from the front of the stage to the top of his talk show desk was.
"So where do I began to tell the magic that is me? Oh I don't know let's just show the clips and dive right into it's all gonna be fabulous"
The first set of clips showed Poseidon's Temple and when Hades bribed his own brother to make the River Styx alter its course.
"Boy did I pull a fast one on Fish Boy or what?" Hades asked proudly. "And what happened? Bada-Bing I was Lord of Athens"
"Oh brother here we go" I muttered in annoyance. Trust me when you have seen the same episode so many times certain things and songs get stuck in your head. I put my arms across my chest and tuned out everything until Merv said.
"But not for long because Athena rules today!"
"I got a soft spot for Athens, but my life, my love and my lady is the Underworld! Hot-cha-cha-cha" Hades interrupted.
I gave a growl and sent my glare at my mate.
I don't mean it babe you're my number one Hades reassured me through the mating bond.
You better I replied back.
"But boss I thought you wanted to dump the Underworld and take over Olympus?" Pain asked.
"Just shut up and show your clips"
The imps winced before they started to play their own clips. The first few were of Pain and Panic get burned or zapped by Hades followed by their various transformations. When Hades had enough he summoned an orb of his flames and shot them at the clip reel and it burned.
"Alright! Alright! Okay! Enough of the stupid minion tricks!" Hades then turned back to us and the audience. "Gosh it's not easy being the most beautiful god in the universe!"
"Make way for a real special guest!" Adonis's voice shouted.
"Oh you got to be joking" I growled feeling smoke coming out of my ears.
Adonis and Helen were sitting on a palanquin that his servants carried on their shoulders appeared onstage.
"Helen and I demand to have the spotlight!"
"Uh when's its turn" Helen said.
"Excuse me?" Hades interrupted. "You got a minute? Allow me to introduce myself"
"Hades Lord of the Dead?" Adonis said his tone turning to fear. He then screamed and his palanquin was turned around. But before they could get away Hades' arm grew larger and he snagged Adonis and Helen pulling them into the show and placed them next to me.
"Adonis Prince of Thrace" Hades greeted. "You know I've been watching you"
"Really?" Adonis asked nervously.
"Yeah, yeah, you got potential"
"Really?" Adonis asked this time his tone was no longer filled with fear.
"Oh please!" Helen added. "Adonis! He's the very embodiment of evil! Eccch! That's icky!"
"Oh icky is it? Look Helen babe look you really need to be more open minded huh? You gotta look beyond the flames, the fangs, the stench of death, and hey I'm a regular guy who HAPPENS TO HATE HERCULES!"
"Well what's not to hate?" Adonis agreed.
"Exactly you care to humiliate him publicly? Together?"
"Love to" Adonis replied.
"Bada-Bing!"
"But first we need to hear some important messages we'll be right back" Merv interrupted.
"This is my show!" Hades protested. "I get to say" Hades then turned to the audience. "We'll be right back"
Five minutes passed before the show returned.
"Hey we're back with Adonis, Helen of Troy, and the hot tempered but beautiful Rayne, and we were all just talking about what a big old loser Hercules is!"
"Just look at the dolt! You call this a role model"
Pain and Panic showed the clips of where Adonis humiliated the crap out of Hercules first with Adonis using his volcano to destroy Herc's class project followed by others.
"Nice! Nice! Why haven't we gotten together before? You have got what it takes to succeed in being evil" Hades complimented Adonis.
"Thank you! You're sweet"
"Now you just wait a minute!" Helen snapped getting Adonis and Hades to turn to her. "I like Hercules!"
She then stood up her hands at her hips.
"Frankly he's everything you two are not"
Icarus muttered something from behind his gag.
"Snoocums how could you say that?" Adonis asked Helen.
"Uh hello?" I stated standing up.
"First of all Adonis you're a womanizer for one, I mean you tried to hit on me three times!"
Hades suddenly flared orange in jealousy.
"Yeah you do chase after a lot of girls Adonis" Helen agreed. "And you haven't really done very many nice things Adonis, but joining the Lord of the Dead really takes the cake!"
"Whoa! Whoa! Am I really that bad of a guy?" Hades asked rhetorically.
"Most of time" I answered.
Hades shot me an annoyed look.
"Whoa hey time out!" I gave Hades the time out sign. "I was also gonna add that your hilarious when you go into a flaming rampage"
"I second that it is pretty funny" Merv agreed.
"Same here" Adonis finished.
"Adonis you and Hades don't know anything about Hercules at all" she then sighed. "He's brave, and sincere, and well I just have to sing about it"
I froze in horror because I didn't like the singing moments during the show. While Helen began to sing my phoenix half suddenly woke up.
What is that god awful singing?!
Helen of Troy is the culprit my dragon half replied.
I don't care make her shut up!
The singing made her so mad she burst into flames and ashes fell to the ground. A few moments later after Helen finished singing a newborn phoenix rose from the ashes.
Now I feel better now that she's shut up
I smirked at her answer just as Helen told Adonis and Hades.
"You can make fun of me but don't you be mean to Hercules he can always be counted on to come through when it matters most"
"That is correct Helen!" Hercules said flying onto the stage with Hermes's winged sandals.
"Great spoil sport is back" Hades growled turning to Hercules in annoyance.
"Hades I demand you release Mr. Griffin and release your stronghold on this quality show"
"You want your spotlight back?" Hades taunted his nephew. "Come on! Come on over here and take it!"
"That's just what I was about to do" Hercules replied getting out his sword.
"Now hey wait a minute!" Merv shouted. "We are not barbarians here! A talk show is no place for fighting"
Hercules flew over and used the sword on Merv's chains. They were cut loose and Merv stood up.
"Unless it's my show we're fighting for!" Merv then turned to Adonis.
Adonis screamed like a girl and ran offstage with Merv following after him. Hercules then undid Icarus's chains before he flew over to Pain and Panic. He used the winged sandals to cut down the video reel which fell on top of Pain and Panic.
"No one shuts me up and gets away with it!"
Pain and Panic high tailed it as Icarus chased after the imps.
"Well Hades" Hercules said turning to my mate. "It looks like it's just you and me, I must warn you I have a powerful weapon in my corner"
"Oh really? And what would that be? Your uncle's stupid wing dings?" Hades conjured a fireball and he threw it at Herc. The winged sandals flew off of Hercules and he landed on the stage barefoot.
"No just something from my father"
"I'm sorry wait a minute? Did you say?"
"Father?"
The clouds ahead opened to reveal Zeus with a smirk on his face.
"Hello Hades you know I think my son's old enough to try his hand at the family business, smiting the wicked!"
Zeus then gave Hercules a thunder bolt and Hades stood up in alarm.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Herc we were just kidding around here huh? You don't want to toss that thing you'll hurt somebody like me"
"One, two" Hercules began.
"Three!" Hades shouted as he hurried offstage just as Hercules threw the thunder bolt. Hades thankfully disappeared before he got zapped and a tornado appeared coming through the stage returning everything to normal.
Underworld
"Oi I really need a vacation" Hades growled as he slammed his face into to the dining room table. "All of this wanting to rule the cosmos wears me out"
"I'm glad you crashed the show love because frankly it was getting boring" I told my mate. I gave his shoulders a quick massage to get the stress out of his muscles.
"The next time I see that Adonis I'm going to kick his ass" Hades growled pulling his head up from the table. "I had no idea he was hitting on you"
"No you won't" I growled giving my mate a look. "I always kick his ass in the end so let that be my job"
"Alright babe" Hades agreed. "By the way when Helen was singing I noticed you didn't like it"
"My phoenix half didn't like it" I corrected. "She thinks Helen sucks as a singer"
"Well you're better than her" Hades said.
Then he smirked.
"What?"
"Babe can you play something for me?"
"What like a song?"
"If you don't mind I really like that band you told me about what's it called again?"
"Evanescence and I'll only do it for you Hothead"
Hades' flames lit up in excitement and he snapped his fingers making the piano come into the dining room.
I went over to the piano and sat myself down in front of it.
I thought of a song I wanted to play and one came to my mind. The piano keys came to life under my fingertips.
Be still, my love
I will return to you
However far you feel from me
You are not alone
I will always be waiting
And I'll always be watching you
Speak to me
Speak to me
Speak to me
Speak to me
I can't let go
You're every part of me
The space between us is just a dream
You will never be alone
I will always be waiting
And I'll always be watching
We are one breath apart, my love
And I'll be holding it in 'till we're together
Here me call your name
Just speak, speak to me
Speak to me
Speak to me
Speak
I feel you rushing all through me
In these walls I still hear your heartbeat
And nothing in this world can hold me back
From waking through to you
We are one breath apart, my love
And I'll be holding it in 'till we're together
Hear me call your name
Just believe and speak to me
Speak to me
Speak to me
Be still, my love
I will return to you
"Wow" Hades said as I finished singing.
"That was a new song she released before I came to this reality" I explained to my mate. "It may be sad, but it's beautiful"
"I agree completely" Hades replied. "However there is one thing I don't agree with"
I turned to my beloved and gave him an arched eyebrow.
"And what would that be?"
"You're more beautiful than the song babe"
"Damn it Hothead don't me blush" I growled standing up.
"Sorry babe but that's my job" Hades teased as I walked past him and took a seat at the chair at the head of the dining room table. Hades walked over so he could stand behind me. "Besides I thought you like it when I made you blush"
"Yes I do" I confessed.
Hades snorted before I felt his hands on my shoulders. Then I felt him starting to massage them.
"Oh damn that feels good" I growled in pleasure.
"Geez Louise babe your muscles are tenser than mine" Hades said as he continued to kneed the stress out of my shoulder blades.
"I don't get stressed out like you do" I stated the obvious to my mate. "Plus I don't get all fired up at the simplest things"
"Now hey that isn't fair" Hades growled.
"Do you see me spreading fire everywhere when I get mad?"
"Ouch, I hate it when your right babe"
He suddenly quit massaging my shoulders and I growled.
I was about to stand up when Hades suddenly appeared in the chair with me. I was now in his lap.
"I was enjoying that" I scolded my beloved putting a finger on his forehead.
"So sue me babe" Hades teased.
I wasn't paying any attention when I felt him sneak his hand up underneath my dress and I quickly slapped his other hand to knock it off.
"Ow babe that hurt" Hades said with a pout.
I shut him up by kissing him. Immediately Hades seemed to forget at his earlier attempt and his tongue met with mine for another dance of dominance.
"Um excuse us most evil ones" Pain interrupted. Both Hades and I quickly broke apart from our kiss and we both turned to the imps in annoyance.
"OUT!" Hades shouted turning orange. He then threw fireballs at Pain and Panic who yelped as they got scorched. When the flames cleared both imps had black soot all over them.
"We'll come back later" Panic said before he grabbed Pain and they ran for it.
"Now where were we?" Hades said smirking.
"I think you" Hades interrupted me with another kiss.
It would have continued if my stupid stomach didn't growl.
"Sorry" I apologized.
"It's fine babe I'll see you after your hunt" Hades reassured me as I got out of his lap.
I gave Hades a kiss against his cheek before I left the dining room.