You Never Fixed Anybody (Kristanna, Pt. 1 of 3)

A slightly edited version of Fixer Upper;). This chapter involves a darker Kristoff and a mention of consummation. (cough, sex, cough) On a final note, the trolls might not be as innocent as you think they are... Enjoy:)

The aurora borealis danced high in the night sky as a celebration rang on below. A large group of stone trolls, a blonde woodsman, and a certain redhead were gathered together in a forest clearing, the redhead happily laughing along while the blonde huntsman sullenly grunted. The trolls spun and danced around the two, decorating them in glowing lights, leafy jewelry, and large capes woven out of grass. Two tall crowns of long grass blades were graced on their heads, and the redhead giggled at the blonde's confused and funny demeanor. The blonde shrugged in return.

Everyone's a bit of a fixer upper
But when push comes to shove
The only fixer upper fixer
That can fix a fixer upper is
True
True
True
True
Love

True love, true love! True love, true love! Trrrruuuuuuuue...

The moment was perfect. The redhead and blonde had been tossed quite ungracefully into a shallow "wedding" pit surrounded by a narrow dazzling bridge of glowing mushrooms and mossy stones. The singing trolls gathered around the pit to see the beloved marry.

"Do you, Anna," the priest began, "take Kristoff as as your trollfully wedded husband-"

"Wait, what?" Anna cried, pushing herself away from Kristoff with surprise.

"What-" Kristoff interrupted. He was cut short when Anna let out a gasp of pain and lost her composure, nearly falling to the mossy ground. Kristoff quickly caught her, but stared in horror as more of Anna's strawberry blonde hair turned white and her face paled, her grip on his arms weakening. "Anna!"

The trolls were silent in shock as the magical spell of happiness was broken. Anna was so weak she could barely stand on her own. Kristoff looked around desperately for advice. As another lock of Anna's hair turned white, his fear turned to panic. "ANNA! Stay with me!"

Anna clung desperately to his shoulder, her warm body steadily cooling. "T-take me back to H-Hans." She shivered.

With sudden fury, Kristoff mounted Anna on his shoulder and turned around to face the trolls with rage. "Listen, all of you!" He roared, climbing out of the pit angrily. Anna nearly slipped from his shoulder and he grabbed her protectively. "I warned you- Anna is going to die! This was what was going to happen! She needs her true love, not me!"

The trolls blinked in unison, beginning to cower in fear.

Kristoff wasn't finished. "And you idiots." He hissed. "You think everything can be solved with a wedding and moonlight and romance, right? You try to hide the fact that she's engaged and the fact that she could be punished and shunned for cheating on her fiancée, just so you can spy on us "consummating" our marriage later?" He was so angry he could barely think of what he was saying.

A gasp of shock went around the trolls and some of them looked ashamed.

"Yes, gasp all you want." Kristoff snarled. "Admit it. Some of you trolls aren't as innocent as you think you are. Don't forget I caught two of you spying on a pair of consummating lovers in Arendelle once." He pointed to two trolls in the distance.

"We never thought that was wrong." An elder troll said slowly. "Actually, we did, but it felt so good to watch-"

Kristoff's rage was coming to a climax now. "See! That's what I mean-"

"Kristoff, I h-have to g-go!" Anna interrupted, tugging on his coat lapel. In his rage, Kristoff had nearly forgotten her.

All of a sudden, Kristoff hated the trolls. Purely hated them. They were the reason why Elsa and Anna- most importantly Anna- had been shut away their whole lives in the castle. The reason he had been stolen from his ice harvesting family and raised to be a "troll". The reason now that Anna was dying. He gripped Anna tightly and ran over to the fearful Sven.

Just then, a loud rolling of stone made him turn around. Grand Pabbie had finally emerged from his rest. "Greetings, Kristoff." He began. "I see you brought a girl-"

In an instant, Kristoff had enough. He firmly seated Anna on Sven and turned to face Pabbie.

He bent down to meet the short height of the stone troll. "Listen, Pabbie. You can go ahead and die now. All your life, all you've done is made people's lives miserable. My life, Elsa's, and now Anna's. I say take your lusty eyes off her legs and go back to the hole where you belong." He spat a glob of spit right into his face and drew his leg back, kicking Pabbie square in the face. The old troll was hurtled through the air and slammed down at the foot of a tree with a scream of pain.

Hurrying back to Sven, Kristoff cursed at the trolls and leapt on his reindeer. In seconds they were gone, deep into the mountains again.

I explored a darker version of our beloved Kristoff here. So far, there's only been a dark Elsa and Hans, so why not Kris? In this three shot, I will be digging more into his backstory and the causes of his angry actions in this chapter. Thanks for reading and please review. Also if this ruined anything for you, blame the trolls. Seriously.