EPISODE 4: LAN MEETS AN OLD FRIEND AND FEELS AN EMOTION
Lan walked through a hallway in the Palace of Caemlyn. He had been summoned to one of the meeting rooms with a message saying, simply, that an old friend had come to visit. Lan couldn't recall having any friends. He supposed Rand had sort of been a friend, in some ways, but he doubted that even the Dragon Reborn could pull off a trick like coming back from the dead.
He found the room to which he had been summoned and opened the door. The interior of the meeting room was sunny and cheerful, minimally appointed with basic furniture. There were two other people in the room: a man wearing a gleeman's cloak, covered with patches of various colors, and a very short, beautiful woman wearing an elegant blue dress. Lan's eyes went wide as he saw her. "Moiraine…" he sputtered.
She smiled at him. He felt completely shaken for the first time in the series. His breath caught, and his vision blurred momentarily. He had felt this only once or twice in his life, and each time, it had threatened to overwhelm the boundaries of the grim, cynical persona he'd built as a wall around himself. The power of human emotion touched him; he could feel it on the edge of his mind, a raging torrent waiting to flow through him and tear apart his soul. He shuddered, struggling, and finally pushed it away, his placid demeanor largely returned. Nevertheless, still astonished, he spoke. "Where have you been? You disappeared months ago and everyone assumed you were dead!"
Moiraine waved the suggestion away with her hand. "Me and Lanfear went through a gateway to visit the Keebler elves or whatever," she said dismissively. "You know, those guys aren't as friendly as their marketing would lead you to believe."
Lan looked vaguely confused and said nothing.
"Anyway," Moiraine went on. "I guess I kind of lost track of the time. Thom had to come get me. I don't know what happened to Lanfear, but I can't say I'm sorry I left her there. She would NOT shut up about Rand. I wanted to slap her after a while." She trailed off, then started as if realizing she had forgotten something. "Oh! I am being so rude! You've met my boyfriend, Thom, haven't you?"
Lan looked at the man standing next to her, a leathery old bag of a man with sunken eyes and a ridiculous white moustache. "Thom Merillin," Lan said, extending his hand politely. "Yes, we've met." He looked at Thom's elderly face for a moment, considering, then looked back at Moiraine again. Was she wearing a new necklace?
The entryway door opened again behind him. Aviendha walked in and stood next to him, a knife in each hand. Her eyes narrowed. "Shall I dance the spears with these wetlanders, husband?" she said, looking in Thom and Moiraine's direction.
Lan sighed. "No, that won't be necessary, Aviendha," he said. "These are some old friends of mine." She nodded, still glaring at everyone, and walked away.
"Your wife?" Moiraine said, amused. Lan nodded. "She seems… nice." The three of them watched Aviendha, who was standing in the corner of the room, threatening a painting with her knives. Moiraine paused, thinking. "Actually, now that I think about it, she seems like a good match for you."
"I think so too," Lan said.
"I know!" Moiraine said, suddenly excited. "We should go on a double date! We can catch up on old times and get to know each other!" She clapped her hands together. "It'll be so much fun. Please say yes."
Lan shrugged his shoulders. "Sure," he said. "Why not?"
"OK, so I've been working on this new story," Thom was saying. He sat across the table from Lan in their little corner booth in the restaurant. Moiraine was seated next to him, listening intently. "It's going to drive the crowd nuts. You're going to love this. It all starts with three country lads who grew up in an isolated farming community that grows the world's best tobacco."
They were in a small, lively tavern in downtown Caemlyn. As they had walked up to the front door, Lan had noticed the bar's wooden sign depicting an apple tree in a sun splashed meadow. "The Apple's Bees", it said underneath. "This town is changing…" Thom had muttered under his breath when he had seen it.
"OK, so anyway," Thom continued. "This farming community never sees any outside travelers, and they're essentially cut off from the news of the world, right? But they're getting ready for a huge celebration, and all the kids go running when a delivery man arrives with a cart of fireworks!"
"Oh yes, everyone loves fireworks," Moiraine said softly, smiling encouragement at Thom.
"Just then, the town is visited by a well-camouflaged master swordsman who used to be a king and a mysterious, powerful wizard." Thom said, getting excited. "They try to convince the three country lads to leave the town, as they are in great danger, but being from the small, rural town they grew up in, they have no reason to believe it."
Aviendha looked thoughtful. "This sounds very familiar…" she said.
"That night, the boys are attacked by ferocious, shadowy monsters straight out of the legends. Forced to flee, they become separated from the swordsman and the wizard and dash across the country, narrowly escaping death in a series of hair-raising chase scenes! With only moments to spare, they all reach a previously agreed upon rendezvous point, where they are reunited with the rest of their fellowship!" Thom leaned back, satisfied. "Then they all go north together toward the dead lands surrounding a great force of evil to confront it and save the world." He grinned. "You ever heard anything like that before?"
"Isn't that Lord of the Rings?" Lan said.
Thom looked completely taken aback. "No! No, Lan, it's the story of Rand, Mat, and Perrin. And the Two Rivers. You were there, Lan!" He looked around the table for help. Moiraine wouldn't look him in the eyes. Aviendha looked bored.
"I think I heard someone say my name," a voice said from behind Lan, cutting Thom off. Lan turned his head around to look. In the next booth, Perrin Aybara sat across the table from his wife, Faile, who had accosted one of the waitresses. "Where are our drinks?" she demanded. "We've been sitting here for a whole book!"
"What the hell is Lord of the Rings?" Thom muttered, looking at the table and shaking his head.
Lan calmly regarded Perrin. "Aybara," he said. "It's good to see a decent character around Caemlyn."
"Yeah, good to see you too," Perrin said. "Faile and I are celebrating our anniversary. I – oh look, the drinks are here." Two waitresses approached their tables with trays of drinks. One of them went to set a glass of water in front of Aviendha.
"If there's any ice in that water, wetlander, I'll put my spear right through your ribcage," Aviendha said, glowering at the waitress, who immediately set the tray down and fled from the table. Aviendha picked up the steak knife from the table and continued to glare at the rest of the wait staff, who pointedly refused to look in her direction.
The waitress at Perrin's table set one glass of water in front of Faile, then one in front of Perrin. "Are you all ready to order?" she said, looking questioningly at Perrin.
Faile immediately grabbed Perrin's water from the table and threw it in the waitress's face. "Don't you look at my husband like that," she growled. The waitress looked shocked, wiping water from her eyes. "Don't think I didn't see that," Faile said. "Talking to my husband, you degenerate hussy!"
Perrin tried to put his hand on her arm. "Faile, I-", he started to say.
Faile grabbed her own glass of water from the table and threw it in Perrin's face. "You looked right at her! Is that all it takes to attract your wandering eye? Go ahead, get an eyeful, why don't you?" She shook her head as if disappointed in him. "On our anniversary, no less!"
The waitress had already disappeared by then. Perrin wiped his face with a napkin and turned back toward Lan's table. "Uh…" he said awkwardly. "Read any good books lately?"
Thom brightened again, smiling. "As a matter of fact, Perrin, I was just getting to the part of my story where our heroes meet a legendary race that lives in the woods and thinks humans are too hasty. I-"
Moiraine interrupted, putting her hand on Thom's arm. "I think that's enough stories for now, dear," she said softly. Thom looked disgruntled, but didn't say anything.
Perrin looked at Moiraine, noticing her for the first time. "Oh! Moiraine! I didn't see you there. Everyone thought you were dead. I – are those new earrings?"
"Oh, yes." Moiraine moved her head from side to side so that they sparkled in the yellow light of the tavern. "Thom got them for me. He's SO generous." She clung to his arm with both hands and smiled.
By this time, Faile had left her own table and was standing in front of theirs. Her eyes were absolutely full of rage. "Are you TALKING to my husband?" she said, very quietly.
Moiraine laughed lightly. "Relax, dear, I have man enough for me right here. Thom is the court bard of Caemlyn." She looked into Perrin's eyes. "What is it you do, again?"
"DON'T YOU LOOK AT HIM!" Faile screamed. She tore the tray of drinks from the table and hurled it across the room. "I won't stand for some conniving bitch trying to steal my man! On my anniversary, of all things!" She picked up Lan's steak knife from the table and pointed it at Moiraine. "Now you get out of that booth right now and come over here so I can cut your stupid face."
Thom looked at Moiraine, who simply nodded. He stood up to let her out of the booth. As she got up, Faile lowered the knife as if about to take a run at her. "I'll kill you, you homewrecker!" she cried, lunging forward.
Looking bored, Moiraine held both of her hands forward, palms out. A bar of blindingly white light shot forth from her outstretched hands and enveloped Faile in dizzying flames. The room shook, and the liquor bottles rattled on the shelf behind the bar. Lan covered his eyes, turning away.
As the smoke cleared from the air, one of the waitresses stopped by with a broom and dustpan to clean up what little was left of Faile. Although there wasn't much there, Perrin could still smell her jealousy.
He looked up at Moiraine, wiping sweat from his forehead. "That was intense," he said. "I kept wanting to do that myself, of course, but I could never decide whether to cut her head off with the axe or bash her brains in with the hammer! I'm very indecisive when it comes to weapons, you see. That's why it took me more than three books to hunt down the Shaido while Rand could find and destroy a Seanchan army in about ten pages."
He stopped and looked thoughtful for a moment. "Then again, since you used balefire, I suppose that plot line never happened. I think that's how it works. Maybe I'll ask the wolves. I have yellow eyes, you see, and I…"
Perrin trailed off as he noticed that Lan and Aviendha were standing next to Moiraine, looking at him with their arms crossed. He began to sweat again. "Uh… is it hot in here?" he stammered nervously. "Well, anyway, since Faile is gone, I can just go back to being a blacksmith again, finally. You like swords, right, Lan? I could make you a really good one."
Lan considered for a long, awkward moment, then nodded. "I'd like that, Aybara," he said. "When can you have it ready?"
Perrin scratched his head, thinking. "You can pick it up in half a book."