Chapter 8

Cameras and reporters mingled with the roaring crowd in civilian attire and Alliance uniforms erupting around Shepard. She pushed through them off the loading ramp into the terminal and held her datapad up to block the flash of lights. Voices yelled questions as bodies clamored against her. A pair of C-sec officers shoved through and flanked her. They pushed away the crowd for her to pass.

"Commander Shepard!" one of the reporters yelled. "What happened on the Normandy?"

"Commander Shepard, did you know your XO was involved in a terrorist plot?"

"Commander, were you seriously injured? Did it take a month to fully recover?"

"Are you back for the Summit? Will you be taking part?"

"Bloody reporters," Miranda muttered shoving up beside Shepard.

Liara stumbled along at Shepard's heels. "Shepard, can you see where we're going?"

"Just keep up." Shepard bulled ahead. C-sec moved slightly ahead turning the crowd aside like a plow.

The crowd pursued her all the way to the Alliance leadership wing. The Alliance guard's eyes widened as Shepard neared trailing a storm of reporters. Miranda and Liara fell back as they approached the hallway entrance. Shepard gave them a firm nod and flashed her ID at the twitching guards manning the desk. One of the guards called into his Omni-Tool for security. C-Sec held their arms out fencing away the surging crowd yelling out to her. She plunged past security and down the central hallway. She cut down the first corner taking a deep breath. The roaring voices faded behind her as she strode down the hall.

She returned some salutes walking down the hall before slow at the office door. She had to get it over with. With all the reporters, vids probably live right now, they'd know she was back. Putting off checking in with the Alliance would only cause problems.

The assistant's moussed hair bobbed as he looked up from the desk. He motioned to the couch with a duck-billed press to his lips. He didn't go through the usual farce of wondering who she was and if she had an appointment. Shepard sank onto the edge of the couch and sat stiffly. Now for the tenderizing marinade of waiting, probably while Wilson played minesweep on his Omni-Tool watching the timer until he figured she'd soaked long enough. Then would come the chewing part. As far as she knew, she wasn't in any sort of trouble, but that didn't mean much. She was always in trouble anymore.

The assistant pranced to his feet pulling up the collar on his uniform before crossing to Wilson's office door. He smoothed a strand of hair in place and punched the door's button. Shepard frowned rising hesitantly to her feet. The assistant gave a simple wave of the hand to the doorway. He made eye contact with her, a little sneering, but clearly directing the motion to her. She hadn't even been waiting two minutes. She plodded over and stepped into Admiral Wilson's office. He sat with steepled fingers at his desk.

"Thank you, Anthony. Commander Shepard."

"Admiral Wilson." Shepard saluted.

He pushed his chair back standing to return the salute.

"Sit." He waved at the chair in front of his desk, even gave a smile. "How are you?"

Shepard stood frozen. This was more alarming than if he'd pulled a cat o' nine tails from the desk drawer and circled her patting it in one palm. This was worse, she just didn't know how yet.

"I'm well," she offered slowly coming forward.

He lowered himself back into his chair as she took a seat in front of him.

"So, Commander …"

"Yes, sir?"

"You'll be in involved in with the Summit, I take it?"

"Yes."

Wilson nodded as he rocked back in his chair. "You've finished your interviews for the investigation? Made the proper reports?"

Between sitting on the station and pacing in the cabin on the ship back, she'd had plenty of time to finish her reports.

"And you've submitted everything?" he asked.

She nodded again.

"Very well." He spread his hands. "Anything you need from the Alliance, right now?"

Shepard eyed him. Could be he thought there was something specific she needed, meant to entrap her somehow. Hell if she knew how though.

"No," she said at last.

"Very well." He sat forward, putting his hands on the desk, and stood.

Shepard stopped herself from twisting her hands together in her lap. She pressed her palms flat on her legs and straightened as he circled.

"So, Commander Shepard," he murmured. "That was an awful mess."

Here it was then.

"We're aware of Anchor's involvement now. At the time, he was an exceptional marine. His track record unassailable." Wilsons puffed out a long breath and shook his head. "Absolutely shocking turn of events. His betrayal has shaken the core of the Alliance. If a mole like that can go undetected, how many more could there be? How many more lives could be lost to them. Sickens us. Sickens me."

He pressed a palm to his chest with a deep frown. Shepard strained to watch him as he paced to the window.

"The lives lost to this …" He drew a breath in sharply looking out the window. He turned and faced her with slow blinking eyes. "Per the accounts of James Vega and the other crew, you're credited with stopping the takeover. Many more lives may have been lost, beyond even just the crew, if they had gotten hold of that ship."

Shepard waited.

"What do you think of Lieutenant Commander Vega?" Wilson asked.

Shepard cocked her head and smoothed out a frown. Strange segway.

"He's a better marine than Anchor ever was on paper. As far as Anchor is what's wrong in a soldier, Commander Vega is what's right. You can trust him. He's an exceptional officer."

Wilson's mouth turned up thoughtfully, and he nodded to himself returning to his desk but not sitting yet.

"He acted commendably in managing the crew in the crisis and has been helpful in reconstructing the events, giving insights. He recovered some important materials, though that may not have been all his own doing. He's showed leadership under pressure and seems to have the respect of the crew. There may be some bigger things coming for Vega. Coming for you too."

Wilson's eyes turned to her. Shepard smiled weakly. Work your way too high, and you rode a desk instead of a starship.

"Don't worry, Commander." Wilson watched her. "We're not taking away the Normandy. She'll be yours again after she's been mopped up."

"All right."

"You'll just have a fancier name for your XO to announce when you come on deck. An XO you get to choose this time. I'll send you files to review. New crew."

Shepard considered for a moment before saying it.

"Sir, I don't know how much I can get from reading personnel files."

"Interview them then. No reason you can't see what they're about before choosing someone."

"Thanks, sir."

Shepard's back stiffened. Her guard was starting to go down. She needed to focus. Wilson tapped the desk with his fingertips before moving to his chair. He paused.

"That's it, Commander." He smoothed his uniform as he lowered himself down. "Long as you're done."

Shepard watched him guardedly. He folded his hands on the desk and waited.

"I am, Admiral."

"Good. I don't need to see you until after the Summit."

Shepard stood slowly.

"Understood, sir."

She backed up to the door then turned.

"Shepard?"

Shepard froze. She knew it. Wilson's chair creaked as he stood. She turned slowly mustering a smile.

"Next time," he said, "let's talk a little more about a problem onboard. I won't be as quick to dismiss it."

Shepard stared at him. She swallowed.

"Thanks, Admiral."

As the doors to his office slid close behind her, she frowned. Alliance staff nodded as they passed by her. She moved with shuffling steps and glanced back at the office again. No one was chasing her down and waving her back for a final word. That really was it then. Maybe she actually hadn't woken up from the coma.

XXX

Club music pulsed. It beat in Shepard's chest with more force than her heart. Violet and red lights swirled momentarily blinding her. Club goers gawked whispered as she passed. Some openly flashed smiles at her raising martini glasses in her direction. One man shoved out by his buddies stumbled toward her with an alcoholed grin. His friends hooted behind him. Shepard mixed into the dancers as he craned to look over the heads. He receded from view in the hot mingling of bodies and lights.

Her celebrity was becoming intolerable. She'd have to change her hair or wear sunglasses everywhere. The hysteria over the Normandy coup, for some reason it drew in the public - the XO mole and Langley Trojan Horse. Trojan horse … She grinned so widely it hurt her cheeks. Damnit, she knew what a horse was! What an ass.

"Shepard! Over here!"

Shepard twisted her head and raised on her tippy toes to see over an amorous pair of humans running hands over each other as they danced. Tali stood up from a table by the wall and waved her over. Shepard dodged around a busty brunette laughing with her friends then ducked past a waiter carrying drinks above his head.

"Hey, Commander." Joker scooted to make room on the half-circled bench, but Shepard drew a chair over instead. She plopped it down between Tali and Joker.

"Hey, guys," Shepard said looking around at the four faces.

"How long you been out bailando, Lola?" Vega stood and fist bumped her over the table. "I'll baliamos toda la noche with you."

"Dangerous undertaking, James." Garrus raised a glass to her. "There's brave and then there's foolhardy. Running at a charging brute - brave. Asking Shepard to dance - I'll let you decide."

"Not all of us here have your way with the beat," Tali said.

"Not anymore," Garrus agreed. "Shepard just sat down."

"Ha ha. Laugh it up." Shepard rolled her eyes. "You're just sore I'm a better shot than you. But you can comfort yourself knowing you'd beat me in a dance off, Garrus."

"Woo, woo," James laughed clanking his glass into Garrus's.

"Right," Garrus said. "How about a show down shooting cans and doing the four step? Game, Shepard?"

Shepard accepted a martini from a waiter.

"You'll need a lot more in me that this, Garrus."

Joker chuckled and pointed off toward the bar. "Uh, we didn't order that for you, Commander. I think your that guy's date now."

Shepard spun her head to the bar. "Oh, damn."

"You're looking at the red head with the beard, right?" James asked. "Not that vorcha?"

Shepard turned a sour face to him. "Right, James."

He held up his hands. "I don't know your tastes. Didn't want you to be disappointed at the end of the night when it's the red head trying to loop you into the cab."

"I figured it out by the waggling red eyebrows."

"And the wink," Joker said. "Don't forget the wink."

"Aww." Tali's head turned to the bar. "What do I have to do for free drinks?"

"Uh …" James motioned to the elevated stage with asari dancers twisting and arching to the beat. "They get free drinks. Guaranteed."

"Oh," Tali said.

"Don't worry, Kid." Garrus put an arm over her shoulder. "I've got you covered."

"I suppose that means I have to go home with you now."

"You'd better. I'm not letting James take you home."

James waved at the waiter then turned to Garrus. "Uh, I've seen your shot with that scope. I'd be muerto before you finished the first box step. I ain't going there. Sorry, Tali, no offense."

"None taken. The blood would stain my suit."

Garrus squeezed her under his arm. "I'd wait until Vega was stepped back enough a good cleaner could get it out."

"Okay. It's my best suit."

"Uh," James tapped the table with his fingers. "We're not really planning this, right?"

"I know it's your best suit," Garrus continued. "I like it on you and I like it …"

"And this is where it gets awkward." Joker put his face into a pint of beer.

" … off of you," Garrus finished looking challengingly around at them.

James chuckled. "Damn. Woulda wagered on you going with 'on the floor.' Good thing a booker wasn't around for it."

"If it's on the floor, James." Tali leaned forward. "It would get dirty or at least wrinkled."

"And it's her favorite suit," Garrus said.

"Aw. Thanks," Tali leaned back with a wobble. "Whoa."

Garrus grinned at her. "No, you can lean all the way back. We're in a booth this time."

"Oh, oh. Good. Good. I'll do that then."

"Uh … I don't need to know," James laughed.

"I can imagine." Shepard swirled the last of her martini around the glass.

"You gonna eat that olive, Lola?"

"Yeah, I don't want it." She held the glass out to him.

James stood and plucked the olive out of the glass, bit down on the toothpick, and drew out it out from between his lips. He flicked onto the table.

Garrus elbowed James and pointed with his head. "Think you turned that guy on over there, Vega."

"Not my vorcha, right?" Shepard spun to look.

A shaved headed with vines and skulls tattooed up his arms leaned across the bar and whispered something in the bartender's ear. He motioned in their direction.

"Well, well." Shepard turned back. "I guess I'm not the only one getting bought tonight."

"Oh damn." James laughed.

"I wish I could pull a toothpick out between my teeth," Tali mumbled.

"Hey, I got you covered, remember?" Garrus said.

Joker chuckled. "Uh, Tali. You pull it out with your teeth, they'll be running off. You gotta pull it out all sultry between plumped lips. Like James did."

"Yeah, James." Shepard drained her glass and smacked it down on the table. "I need another drink. Do it again."

"What? I ain't doing it again. And when my drink does come, Lola, it's mine, not yours. I earned it."

"With my olive!" Shepard said.

"It's like a gun, Shepard," Garrus said. "You have to use it right to get the bang out of it."

"Sitting in my glass was 'no bang,' huh?"

"See anyone else buy you a drink?" Garrus said. "Definitely 'no bang.'"

"She's already paid for." Tali motioned in her direction. "She's going home with the red head."

"True," James shrugged. "Kind of like throwing credits down the well."

"Yeah? Look who's talking," Shepard said.

A waiter lowered a tray with a pint of beer. James froze. Garrus plucked it off the tray and plopped it in front of James.

"Maybe it's actually from that sexy, dark haired chica over there?"

"Been watching you oogle her on the dance floor," Garrus said. "Hasn't looked this way."

Shepard smiled. "Hey, I could—"

"Oh, damn." James's face turned deer-like. "Oh, sh—"

"Vega's date's on his way over to collect." Joker laughed looking down into his glass.

"Quick. Someone take a drink of this so it ain't mine." James edged it toward Joker. "I haven't had any."

"Like, cool down, James." Joker nudged it back. "He looks like a nice guy, and I'm sure there's still uninked space on his body for your name one day."

"Joker, I'm gonna—"

"Here." Shepard reached over the table and grabbed the pint of beer. She took a long slurp and turned back to the tattooed man. He stopped dead in his tracks halfway to their table. Shepard raised the mug to him, raising her eyebrows, and making a shooting motion with her free hand. He pulled his head back lips retracted.

"Whoa, Shepard." Joker laughed. "That face said more than a string of insults could."

The tattooed man stumbled back and turned reluctantly back to the bar. He glanced back at them, mouth slightly ajar. Shepard held up her pint and looked over a raised shoulder with a wink. He whipped his head back to the bar.

"Damn, Lola," James chuckled. "You know how to charm the barflies."

"Whoa, look." Joker hunched forward with a shaking laugh. "I think you insulted your sponsor, Shepard."

The red head's face pinched in a dark frown as he dropped off the stool at the bar. He glared slamming his mug down on the bar and stalked away through the crowd.

"Well then." Shepard sank back into the chair.

"Guess it's a cold night for you tonight, Shepard." Garrus grinned.

"My plans for a litter of gingers … damn." Shepard took a long pull of beer then looked over at James with a smirk. "See, got it after all. Ta da."

"Ta da, Lola?" James motioned around his mouth. "You got a beer mustache going on."

"Real attractive, Shepard," Garrus agreed. "Maybe the vorcha'll like it."

"You think?" Shepard whipped her head to the bar straining to look then turned back as if disappointed. "He wasn't looking."

Joker snorted. "That's what I'd do too if a woman with a mustache was checking me out."

James shrugged. "Depends on the beer. For the mustache. If it's lite stuff, then no way, but that stuff's good. Walk around a little, Lola. Your chances aren't bad."

Shepard cocked her head with a smirk. "What about you, James? Want a taste?"

"Uh …"

Shepard wiped her lips with the back of her hand.

"Why'd you do that?" Joker poked her. "The vorcha's looking now."

"Really?" Shepard took a full swig of beer and spun around. "Where is he?"

"Did you get the mustache again?" Garrus asked. "Turn here."

"What do you think, Tali?" Shepard turned.

"Poor kid's asleep," Garrus said.

"There goes your hot hook up too, huh, Scars?" James cackled. "Hard night for the buyers."

"The tattooed human could've had Shepard pretty easy," Garrus said. "She practically threw herself at him, beer mustache, and all."

"That was before I got my 'stache, Garrus."

"You musta shaved. It's gone now." Garrus drank from his glass. "This is almost gone."

Joker leaned into Shepard. "Get a wide enough mug, and you could get a full beard going."

Shepard grinned. "I'd be beating off the vorcha then."

"What?" Tali bolted upright. "Is there a fight?"

"What?" James laughed twisting to look at her. "What's she talking about?"

"Shepard wants to beat up some vorcha," Garrus leaned his head to Tali's, "but she's not actually going to do it. Right, Shepard?"

"No," Shepard sighed. "I'm almost out of beer. How would I lure them?"

"And I only see one," Joker said.

"Might have friends outside." Shepard shook her head sadly. "But I'll never know. Alas, I'm out of beer." She reached across the table for the discarded toothpick and flicked it at James. "Another!"

James batted it away. "Get your own. I'm not enabling your vorcha debauchery."

"Oh, damn." Shepard stretched back laughing. "You think they bite?"

"Looks like they do." James shrugged.

"Shepard, Shepard, Shepard." Tali swayed leaning over and draped an arm over Shepard.

"Don't steal my date, Shepard," Garrus said. "You heard my warning to James."

Shepard scooted her chair closer to the bench putting her arm around Tali. She grinned at Garrus.

"I'd stay in nice and close, Garrus. Remember. It's her best suit."

"Damn you, Shepard." Garrus waved a fisted claw at her. "Why can't human blood be clear?"

"We are like 75% aqua or something," James said.

"I don't think it's 75% water for some of us." Joker poked Shepard's empty pint. "Right, Commander?"

"I only had two."

"You're a twig, Lola. Two for you is like ten for the Vega."

"Which is like a shot glass for Tali." Joker pointed at them.

Tali's head drooped against Shepard's shoulder. Shepard patted her shoulder.

"It's okay, Tali. We girls'll stick together."

"Oh, good," Tali mumbled. "That's just … so, so good …"

"Damn, Scars. You carry her home every night?"

"Her home, my home. Same place. Inconvenience isn't high."

"Carrying her every night though? I thought you were looking buffer, hombre." James grinned.

"You see that through my suit, do you?"

"Well, no. You're neck's more … strapping."

Joker smirked. "And that's how he gets all the men."

Shepard twisted toward the bar and turned back. "The vorcha might like that line, James."

"You're obsessed with that vorcha, Lola." James pointed at her. "I told you. You're on your own. I see you tomorrow and one side of your neck's all chewed up … remember we had this conversation."

Joker slapped the table. "Nice."

James put up a palm, and Joker slapped it.

Garrus looked over at Shepard and mouthed, "What does that mean?"

"Try it, Garrus," Shepard motioned. "You might like it."

"Put it there, Scars. Give me … uh, three? How many you got there?"

Tali pulled upright from under Shepard's arm. "Is someone buying me drinks? Did someone say they were buying me drinks?"

Garrus clapped James on the shoulder. "I changed my mind. Vega, Shepard … whichever one of you wants to pick up the tab, you can have her for tonight. Tonight only."

"I'm not good enough?" Joker sputtered.

"Sure, you too, Joker. But whoever says 'yes,' you're cleaning the vomit out of the ecosuit."

"Eww." Joker sat back.

"Pass."

"Pass."

"Oh, damn." Garrus reached over and drew Tali close. "Guess it's me and you again, Kid."

"That's my favorite anyway." She collapsed against him.

"Aww," Shepard slouched back with a grin.

Tali slumped against Garrus as he rubbed her arm. James beat his hands on the table to the rhythm of the music eyeing the brunette on the dance floor. Joker looked at Shepard sideways and grinned.

"Commander." He raised his glass.

"Joker." She lifted her empty mug.

She was happy to be alive.

They loitered by the skycar terminal with the club music throbbing behind them. Rhythmic lights reflecting across the landing pad from the open door. Joker swayed on his crutches beside her looking up at the night sky. No moon tonight.

Garrus's arm supported Tali dropping against him. "I think 'dibs' is what you humans say, so … dibs."

"No fair." James put his hands on his hips. "Didn't know the first skycar was up for dibs."

"Everything's up for dibs," Shepard agreed.

"Thanks, Shepard," Garrus said. "Way to respect the system."

"Bah!" James pawed a hand at them.

Tali pulled herself up straighter on Garrus's shoulder. "Shepard, we're glad you came back from that awfulness."

Shepard shifted on her feet. "Uh, thanks, Tali."

"Pretty damn rough, Shepard," Garrus said. "But you're alive … again."

"Yeah," Shepard said. "Wish there were more that could say that."

"Hey, you did what you could," Garrus said. "Like you always do."

"This time though," Shepard shrugged, "didn't feel like enough."

"Ah, Shepard. You can't save the galaxy every time."

"Scars, is right, Lola. You did what you could. Don't even know what would have gone down if you hadn't been there."

"I guess," Shepard sighed. "Sure."

"Don't worry about it," James smiled. "You did good. You're still standing. Come back fighting another day."

"Right," Shepard swallowed. Her throat felt dry.

"Here it is." Garrus twisted. "My dibs."

"You go ahead," James said. "I think my party quota ain't quite reached. Besides, that brunette's still in there. I'm going back in. Wish me luck."

Joker smirked. "Wish you luck or wish you get lucky?"

James grinned as he backed toward the door. "I'm James Vega. I don't need luck to get lucky."

Garrus helped a wobbly Tali into the skycar. Tali melted into her seat and gave a weak wave. Garrus paused halfway in.

"You're going to the memorial tomorrow, right, Shepard?"

"See you there," Shepard said.

"Skycar?" Tali lolled her head against Garrus. "Embassy's too far off route."

"We left the shuttle at the restaurant, remember?"

"Oh, oh, yeah. No, I don't remember that."

Garrus gave a nod as the door sealed close. The skycar lifted off. Another one wasn't in sight yet. James had already vanished into the pounding glow of the club. Shepard looked over at Joker.

"Fight you for the next one."

"Says the Champion of the Galaxy to the guy on crutches. Classy, Shepard."

"I'd let you get in the first hit."

"You died, what, three times and came back swinging? First hit isn't doing much."

"I suppose," Shepard said.

Joker glanced around them.

"Hey, uh, Shepard?"

"Uh huh?"

Joker shifted on his crutches and looked around them one more time.

"About that stuff you told me on Normandy. I don't, like, blame you or anything. You know, for EDI or whatever. What I said," Joker chewed the corner of his lip and straightened his baseball cap with one hand. "That stuff about wishing you'd died and all. I didn't really mean that."

Shepard smiled. "Hey, if you're wishing me dead worked, I'd be pretty pissed you weren't using that on the reapers. Woulda saved a lot of property damage."

"I guess."

"I get it though." Shepard shrugged. "Loss. Know that pretty well by now."

"It sucks. First my family, then EDI. I don't know, kinda feels like it's all or nothing, you know? Push stuff away. Guess it feels better choosing to lose something when everything else just gets taken. Some control when everything else's gone to hell."

Shepard raised her eyebrows. "Joker … that's actually pretty insightful."

"Yeah, that's usually why I stop before that last pint."

"It's a good side of you."

"Uh … yeah. Now this is all sentimental and crap. Let's talk about beer mustaches again or the X180 suspension drive. Something."

"Here's a skycar." Shepard nodded at the lights nearing in the darkness.

"You can have it," Joker said.

"There's another behind it. Just go."

"Aye, aye, Commander."

Joker slid his crutches in first then hopped inside. He gave a tipsy salute as the skycar lifted away. Shepard listened to the club music standing alone in the darkness. She tightened folded arms against her chest, and squinted up at the approaching hum of a skycar. The salty breeze gusted through Shepard's hair as she rushed up to the skycar's door. It popped open. An Alliance officer looked up at her - lower rank, unfamiliar, dark hair. He ducked under the shuttle door and hoped out with a sideways smile before continuing down the patio landing to the street. The bright outline of his uniform faded into the dark.

The shuttle's door stared to close. Shepard lunged and caught it. She glanced back along the wall, but he was gone. Shepard climbed into the seat and settled against the door as it clicked shut. The neons of the club dimmed away as it lifted.

Shepard leaned her face against the glass watching it fog with each breath. Leaving the barrage of lights, music, and movement, her eyes adjusted to the dark, ears ringing in the silence. Away from the nightlife and back home. She frowned. It wasn't really home, just a room. She wasn't really sure where home was. The Normandy, probably. A hollowness opened inside her. She'd been surrounded with so many people tonight, a club full of raucous movements and bodies, joking and cajoling with her closest friends. It didn't make sense how she could feel so alone.