Boku no CROSSOVER CRISIS!

Issue 3: Welcome to U.A. High, Strangers! Unwanted visitors on campus!

A new morning dawns over the U.A. campus. In the distance, the school bell rings.

Thor walks into the teacher's lounge, hammer naturally in hand. She finds Spider-Man there, sitting on a wall behind a holographic display that's being projected up from Iron Man's helmet, which lies by itself in the middle of the floor. Ectoplasm sits in a chair on the other side of a room, reading a book. Spidey raises a hand. "Morning, T. Where you been?"

"I required rest," the Goddess of Thunder says. "Where are the others?"

"Well... Beast's off talking to that principal... rat... bear... person," Spider-Man says. "They've really hit it off, in case you couldn't tell last night. Rogue's out touring the campus. Doreen's in the library, trying to look up more stuff about that Apocalypse place... said something about that being a quote, obvious red flag, unquote. Tony's down in the school's labs with that Power Loader guy, trying to rig some kind of space-time-thingamajig to get us back home. He left me JARVIS here -" He motions to the helmet with his foot. "- so we could search them thar Intarwebs for anything about time travel that might match what we went through. (Big fat zero on that so far, by the way...)"

"I see," Thor says. "And what of Ms. Marvel?"

The next page cuts to Ms. Marvel, standing awkwardly in front of the chalkboard in Class 1-A's homeroom. "So... I guess I'll be sitting in with you guys for now?" She's wearing a standard U.A. school uniform, albeit with her mask and scarf worn over it. "Sorry about yesterday again. Guess we kinda got off on the wrong foot and all..."

Class 1-A reacts more or less the way one might expect. Todoroki doesn't say anything. Jirou looks bored and examines her nails. Bakugou just sneers and looks away, his feet on his desk. "Don't worry about it," Ojiro/Tail Man says, smiling. "It sounds like it was a confusing situation. Mistakes were clearly made on all sides."

"You were an honorable opponent," Tokoyami says, folding his arms across his chest. "I bear you no grudge."

Iida, standing on his feet, bows repeatedly. "ON BEHALF OF THE ENTIRETY OF CLASS 1-A, I MOST HUMBLY APOLOGIZE FOR OUR TERRIBLE CONDUCT! PLEASE FORGIVE US! HAD WE BUT KNOWN YOU WERE VISITORS -" From her seat nearby, Uraraka puts on an embarrassed smile, thinking, Iida's being way too intense again...

"That web stuff that spider guy had was amazing!" Sero says excitedly. "Does his body generate that stuff as part of his Quirk? Or is it a support item of some kind?"

"Okay, okay," Eraserhead says gruffly, slumped against the wall in his sleeping bag. "Let's keep the meet-and-greet down to ten or fifteen minutes. We've got a lot of ground to cover today."

Kamala fake-smiles. "Ha ha! Wow! (... so everyone else can see the teacher's in a sleeping bag, right? It's totally not just me?)"

In the back of the class, Mineta's doing the Gendo pose, complete with scary shiny eyes (in lieu of glasses.) "Hmm... yes..." he mutters. "Definitely has the exotic thing going for her... bonus points for the hair... bust's not as big as the blonde's or that Rogue woman's, though... all in all, a solid B."

Yaoyorozu reaches over and Dope Slaps Mineta. "Please feel free to use physical violence against Mineta if he makes you feel uncomfortable," she says coldly. "We're attempting to train him out of his disrespectful habits, but it's been slow going."

"Indeed," Mineta mumbles, his face smushed into his desk by the force of the blow. "T'is my cross to bear as a humble pervert..."

And wow, okay, that just happened not cool wtf? Kamala thinks, her expression frozen somewhere between a smile and a horrified grimace. Could this get any more uncomfortable?

"Oi," a voice speaks up from off-panel, right on cue. "Let me just make one thing clear..."

On the next page, Ms. Marvel turns to see Bakugou looming over her, his best delinquent sneer on his face. "You tell that squirrel %!#*% that I want a rematch. I don't care where you people are from. No one sucker-punches me and gets to live. Next time I see her, I'll pulverize her. Got it?"

"Uhm..." Kamala blinks, caught off-guard by the sudden over-the-top display of hostility. "... okay?"

"Good." Bakugou turns and stalks out of the classroom, dragging his backpack alongside him. "Someone tell Aizawa I'm in the can."

"What's his problem?" Kamala asks as he leaves the room.

"S-sorry about that." Deku smiles nervously. "Kacchan - he's, well - it's complicated, you know?"

"No, it's not," Tsuyu says bluntly. "He's just a jerk."

(In the background, Uraraka tilts her head and thinks, the fated battle between man and... squirrel?)

Wow, Kamala thinks. And here I thought my school was rough...

Elsewhere, in a lavishly furnished office, Beast sips his tea. "So you really are a naturally uplifted non-human?" he asks. "Fascinating! Even in my time, examples of such traits in other species was incredibly rare. The physiological changes you went through must have been extraordinary."

"Indeed! Though I at least came out of it with a significantly extended lifespan." Nedzu's constant cheerful smile is a bit creepy, given the topic of conversation. "Not all of said changes were natural, however. A number of human researchers felt compelled to... explore the source of my Quirk."

"I see. I'm sorry to hear that." Hank nods gravely. "I myself have ended up on the wrong end of the scalpel a fair number of times, I'm afraid..."

An alarm suddenly goes off. "Warning," a computerized voice says. "School airspace compromised. Multiple incursions detected." A holographic display lights up over their heads.

"Trouble?" Beast asks.

"Oh, that's the defense system's early warning interface." The principal stirs another bit of sugar into his cup. "It's deliberately built to be over-sensitive. Most likely just an unscheduled flight or a bit of space debris... computer, please report size and number of radar contacts."

"Processing..." The computer pauses. "Total number of objects in the ten-to-twenty-meter-length range: five hundred and twelve."

The principal freezes. "... what."

Back in the classroom, Kamala leans against the teacher's desk. "So, wait..." Uraraka asks. "You really can't tell anyone your real name?"

"That's how the secret identity thing works, yeah." Kamala shrugs. "Back home, being a hero's kinda a... legal gray area, let's call it. And besides, if the bad guys know who you are, that means they can target you and your family, you know?"

"Wow..." Uraraka blinks. She seems to be really taken aback by the idea. A few rows away, we see Deku hurriedly scribbling down notes.

"That's so weird," Kirishima says. "Here in Japan, being a hero's - like - the ultimate profession! The ones at the top of the field are celebrities! With paid endorsements, advertising contracts - you name it!"

"Not to mention, the police have been actively going out of their way to work with heroes for as long as anyone can remember." Yaoyorozu crosses her arms. "A world where heroes are treated like criminals... it's unimaginable."

"Huh." Kamala plays with the end of her hair. "That sounds... kinda nice, actually..."

The wall behind her - chalkboard and all - suddenly vanishes in a blast of red light, with a loud ZZZOORRRPPP.

Kamala - in what is probably not her best idea - slowly leans back and stares wide-eyed out of the sizable hole that's just been made in the building. "oh geez," she says in a small voice.

Elsewhere on campus, Rogue looks up in the sky. "Aww, hell." It's hard for her to keep the terror she's instinctively feeling off of her face. There's a lot of history for her here.

Across campus in the library, even Squirrel Girl - sitting beneath a window with The Lonely Planet Guide to Apocalypse cracked open - looks a little dismayed. "Oooohkay that's a lot," she says.

Inside the teacher's lounge, Spider-Man stares in shock as his spidey-sense goes into overdrive. "These things?! But - they'd have to be ancient by now!"

Down in Power Loader's lab, Tony Stark looks up at a monitor screen, completely deadpan. "Great. Just what this day really needed."

In a big splash panel that takes up two pages, the first group of Sentinels land on the U.A. campus. Hundreds more hang in the sky above. "MUTATIONS DETECTED," the ten-meter-tall humanoid robot in the lead says. "BEGIN STERILIZATION PROCEDURES."

Alarms and alerts roar across U.A. as the entire campus locks itself down, walls popping up from the ground, steel shutters immediately closing down around every available window and surface. Elsewhere, anti-air missile launchers and point-defense turrets rise from out of rooftops. "This is a Level-One Security Alert," a computerized voice announces. "Full campus lockdown is in effect. This is not a drill. All students are to immediately report to the closest shelter. All teachers to defensive positions. Repeat, this is a Level-One -"

Back in the classroom, the lights have turned red. Eraserhead is out of his sleeping bag in an eyeblink and is already calmly barking out orders. "Everyone, stay rational. Grab your costumes and support gear, leave everything else -"

In the foreground, Kamala tears off the shirt of her school uniform - yes, of course she wore her costume underneath. "I don't know a whole lot about these things," she says. "Thought they all got scrapped years ago, way before I got my powers -"

"Ceramic-alloy armor," Beast states. Much like the exterior of the school, the principal's office has transformed, a large central computer rising up out of the floor, holographic security feeds covering the walls. "Non-metallic polymer skeleton. Fires energy blasts from the hands. Concealed tasers in each fingertip. Thrusters in the feet. Flamethrowers and liquid nitrogen spray nozzles midway between the ankles and knees." He pauses. "I should add, I've seen them kill millions in my time."

Nedzu has lost his smile. "Point defenses online," he mutters, paws scrabbling at the controls. "Emergency beacons - where are the emergency beacons -"

"They're programmed to hunt down and kill mutants on sight!" Spider-Man bounces down a stairwell from wall to wall, Iron Man's helmet tucked beneath one arm, Ectoplasm just barely managing to keep up behind him. "So anyone who gets their powers naturally from their own DNA, instead of radiation or glowy clouds or whatever. Meaning pretty much everybody here!"

Outside, the mass of Sentinels on the ground continues to grow. A missile battery deploying from underneath a decorative shrub gets off a single salvo before a dozen energy blasts take it out. "NEUTRALIZING AUTOMATED DEFENSES," one of the Sentinels says.

Another platoon of the giant robots focuses their fire on the main building. Their energy beams slowly begin to carve through the armor plating. "LIFE SIGNS DETECTED WITHIN ENCLOSED SPACE. DEPLOY ADAPTIVE INFANTRY MODELS." Their chest plates crack open and unfold outward, revealing two smaller robots contained within each larger unit. The Infantry Sentinels each stand somewhere between two to three meters tall, and - in contrast to their large purple cousins - appear to be covered in gray semi-organic scales (resembling, in other words, the machines seen in the Days of Future Past movie.) They activate and fly clear of their support gantries.

Bouncing around the corner of the stairwell, Spider-Man finds himself faced with Tony, charging up the stairs from the opposite direction. "Tony! Catch!" The webhead tosses Iron Man his helmet.

Tony catches it and puts it on. "Okay," he says. "Connecting to the security monitors..."

"Those are supposed to be secure systems," Ectoplasm grouses.

"Lots of things are. Annnd we're up." A diagram of the main building appears on the screen inside Tony's helmet, a number of red arrows pointing to areas of stress. "Multiple breaches in progress. Doesn't look like the armor's going to hold out for much longer."

"Oh, boy. We better get outside. Buy the kids more time to evacuate." Spidey glances over to the sealed door on the landing next to them, then to Ectoplasm. "Can you get that open?"

"Mmh." The faculty member goes to a keypad by the door and starts to enter a code. "Don't suppose there's any point in mentioning that neither of you are officially licensed to use your powers in this country?"

"Yeah, yeah," Spidey shoots back. "How about we table that until after we deal with the killer robots, okay?"

"Hey." Tony glances around. "Where's Thor?"

"Thor?" Spidey blinks. "She - um..."

Outside, a massive bolt of lightning falls from the heavens and strikes the ground, tossing a dozen Sentinels into the air like ninepins.

"ENOUGH," the Goddess of Thunder roars. She stands out in the open, twirling her hammer above her head, white-hot sparks flying through the air. "YOU COME HERE TO MURDER INNOCENTS? HAVE AT THEE!"

The Sentinels around her raise their hands. "ASGARDIAN SIGNATURE DETECTED," one rumbles. "DIRECTIVE: ELIMINATE."

Back inside the stairwell, Spidey and Iron Man pause, staring out the open door. "So," Tony says conversationally, "she's hot."

Spider-Man rubs his head. "Tony..."

"What? We're allowed to say that, right?" Iron Man tilts his head. "We're allowed to just - observe certain objective facts. Us theoretically-spoken-for men? It's not like we're dead or something -"

"Tony!" Spider-Man cuts him off. "Tony, get out there!"

"Fine, fine." A number of small missiles pop out from Iron Man's shoulders. "Yeesh. When did you get to be such a workaholic, anyway -"

Iron Man pushes through the door and launches himself upwards. Spider-Man gives Ectoplasm a nod. They charge out onto the battlefield.

Somewhere underneath the campus, Midnight and Rogue run through a corridor deep underground. "This tunnel leads back to the main building," the Japanese heroine explains. "I hate to just run like this, but my Quirk isn't exactly useful against machines."

"Yeah," Rogue says, "I know th' feeling..." Dammit, she thinks bleakly, what I wouldn't do t' have Danvers' powers back right now...

Inside the main building, Class 1-A stands lined up in the hallway just down from their classroom, backs pressed to the wall. Some of them have partially got their costumes on, or at least whatever pieces modesty will allow. Standing towards the back of the line, Deku struggles to put on his boots, having already put on his neck brace. At the line's front, Eraserhead glances around the corner. "Everyone, quiet," he mutters. "We've got company. You -" He looks down at Ms. Marvel, who crouches on the ground next to him. "Take a look. Anything you can tell me about these things?"

Ms. Marvel peeks around the corner. She sees two Infantry Sentinels down the hall. "SCANNING," the one in front says. "INHUMAN GENE COMPLEX DETECTED. TERRIGEN TRACE DECAY = 60 MINUTES. DIRECTIVE: TERMINATE."

She pulls back and shakes her head at the teacher. "Whatever they are, they don't seem to like me..."

"Hrmph." Eraserhead pulls on his goggles. "All right... let's take this slow..."

Outside, Mjolnir smashes the head of one Sentinel before rebounding and tearing through two more.

That leaves Thor fending for herself back on the ground, though. She grabs the foot of a Sentinel, partially tearing its leg off - only for a burst of flame to explode into her face.

She growls and staggers back, crossing her hands in front of her to block... only to recoil again in pain as two more Sentinels open fire on her back...

Back inside the school, on the other end of the hallway from Eraserhead and Ms. Marvel, Deku hears something come from around the corner behind him. "- !" He glances at Yaoyorozu, who's bringing up the rear of the column. She nods and starts to pull a naginata out from beneath her shirt. Deku carefully peeks around the corner...

... and finds himself staring up directly at three Infantry Sentinels. The one in the lead morphs its arm into a very long, very nasty-looking blade. "TARGETS ACQUIRED."

On the other side of campus, a frazzled Squirrel Girl - face covered with ash and oil, hair sticking up in odd places - kicks her way through the back of a downed Sentinel. Okay, note to self, she thinks. Don't chew on the green wires. Bad plan. Bad, bad plan. "S'okayyyy," she slurs. "Who's next, huh? Who wants a piece?"

Right on cue, a Sentinel looms over her, its hands charging with deadly energy. "Yeah, that's right, c'mon!" Doreen shouts. "You think I'm scared of you, ya - ya big jerk? Just 'cause I can't feel my arms right now... or my toes... or most stuff below the neck, actually... crapbaskets..."

"OKLAHOMA -"

Outside on the battlefield, a sudden tornado of activity rips apart the Sentinels at Thor's back - and four more besides for good measure.

"- SMASH!"

Mjolnir rips through the chest of the Sentinel directly in front of Thor. She raises her hand and catches it as the robot drops.

All Might appears out of the cloud of dust left in the tornado's wake. "Ma'am."

"Friend All Might. Well met." Thor absentmindedly spits some blood onto the ground. "Your school appears to have developed an infestation of metal."

"Indeed." All Might cracks his knuckles. "Shall we continue to take care of business, then?"

"Aye, I should think so."

They turn and face the horde of Sentinels, at least three score strong. A dozen more float down from the sky. "DIRECTIVE: KILL," one among the throng says.

"KILL," the others echo. "KILL."

The caption box at the bottom of the page naturally reads: To be continued!

OMAKE / LETTERS COLUMN!

Q: How does Beast feel about U.A itself? i imagine a publicly acknowledged school to turn Quirk Users, who are essentially mutants, into Super-Heroes, would come off as a dream come true for any X-Man. - kyugan

"Oh, most certainly." In the first panel, Hank McCoy's face breaks into a wide grin. "To say this place exceeds my and the Professor's wildest hopes would be an understatement. The level of resources on display here is incredible! Easily on par with, if not surpassing, the most extravagant efforts of SHIELD and the US military in my own era. And that's not even going into the little things - the accommodations made for unique body types and powers, the frankly breathtaking level of support from the local community!...

"Yet, if I'm honest... it's what little I've seen outside the school's walls that I find most heartening of all." The blue-furred scientist takes off his glasses and cleans them. "Mutants being what we are, it's easy for us to fall into the trap of what one might term genetic determinism - believing, in other words, that one's powers represents the sum total of one's potential. In contrast, I have spent much of my life trying to prove that I am more than just muscle and rugged good looks. While I admit I wasted many years on self-hatred and denial... it is still my intellectual efforts, rather than my physical prowess, of which I am most proud.

"And while I do see some evidence of the attitude I mentioned, it is not as predominant as one might have feared." He puts the glasses back on and smiles again. "While it's true that celebrity culture here centers upon powered heroes - in the more everyday arena, I see Quirkless psychologists working alongside psychics as equals. Pyrokinetics training as firefighters, rather than soldiers or arsonists. Teleporters working as day care workers, and technopaths choosing to live as traditional farmers.

"It seems that at least some here believe, as the Professor and I did, that, while mutant abilities are an important part of oneself that should - no, need to be accepted... they need not define one's path in life, nor ideally limit one's choices. If that part of the Xavier legacy has survived to this day, in some form... I could not be more proud, nor grateful."

"Err, Professor McCoy?" Nedzu asks. The principal dangles from his waistcoat, the back of which is being pinched by a massive mechanical hand. "If I could perhaps impose on you for a moment?..."

"DESTROY," the Sentinel overhead rumbles.

Beast eyes the robot and sighs. "Of course, there are certain aspects of that legacy I would rather have been left in the past..."

Q: For the writer - so what kind of crazy excuse for Marvel continuity are you using, anyway? Earth-616, the Ultimate universe, the Cinematic Universe?

I'll be honest. I'm pretty much just picking and choosing from all of them as I like. Ms. Marvel, Squirrel Girl and Thor are intended to resemble how they appear in their recent comic runs. In Spidey's case, I'm deliberately choosing to ignore One More Day - meaning that Peter probably is in his early thirties, is still married to Mary Jane, and works as a science teacher, which seems to me to be the most natural place for him. Tony, of course, is basically pattered after Robert Downey Jr.'s take on the role (and really, can anyone even imagine that character any differently now?) Beast follows the way Joss Whedon wrote him in his Astonishing X-Men run, and Rogue's just a more weathered version of her persona in the 90's cartoon show.

Otherwise, the Chituari attack in the first Avengers movie obviously happened at some point; SHIELD's still around; Wolverine's alive, though I'm sure X-23 must be around somewhere ...

Oh, and NEXTWAVE. NEXTWAVE definitely happened. Somehow.

Q: Todoroki, do you have any kind of grudge against Rogue for stealing your powers?

"Not really," the quiet student says. "My Quirk returned to full strength just a few hours after I regained consciousness, just as promised. I haven't encountered any issues since then."

He looks down at his left hand. "..."

"... though... if I'm being honest with myself..." He pauses. "In many ways, my Quirk has defined my entire life from the moment I was born. To be without it, even for such a short period of time... it felt strange, of course. Like temporarily losing a limb. But at the same time, it was... oddly liberating, in a way...

"From that perspective... I almost feel as though I should be thanking her."

And that's it for this time, true believers! See you next issue!