Chapter 4

Everyone's Acting Weird All the Sudden

Finding all three of his best friends sitting cross-legged on his bed when he came out of the shower wasn't how Remus had expected his first Saturday of the school year to begin.

"Er, what's this?" he asked slowly, analyzing them with one eyebrow raised.

He felt awkward standing in front of them with his hair still dripping slightly onto his collar. He was incredibly thankful that he'd dressed in the bathroom instead of waiting to do so in the dormitory.

"We need to talk," said Sirius, sounding far more cheerful than Remus expected people to when they said such ominous words.

Remus sat on his own bed as if it were foreign territory.

"I'm guessing this isn't about whether to spend today by the lake or in the castle."

The other three boys laughed, and Remus felt some of the tension in his stomach ease. At least they didn't seem worried. This couldn't be anything bad. He tried to let that calm him. Perhaps they were about to invite him to join a prank. That wouldn't be unusual, even if them informing him of it while sitting in a circle on his mattress was.

"We did some snooping this summer," James said, leaning forward and whispering as if there were others in the dormitory who could overhear them.

Though he knew they were gone, Remus couldn't help but gaze at the beds of their roommates to make sure they were alone.

"Okay," he said slowly.

James and Sirius snooped into everything. The year before they had uncovered classified information from the Ministry hidden in James' dad's office, but it hadn't been anything particularly interesting to a group of teenaged boys. Just bureaucratic nonsense that wouldn't have made a stir even if it were leaked to the press.

"Have you heard anything about the Order of the Phoenix?" James asked.

Remus frowned, shaking his head. It sounded like the sort of thing he should have heard of.

"Rumour has it," Sirius began in the same conspiratorial whisper that James was using, "Dumbledore's created a secret society to fight You-Know-Who. He's calling it the Order of the Phoenix, and only the best of the best are being allowed to join up. It's made up of the people that Dumbledore trusts more than anyone else."

They watched Remus closely for his response. He looked between the three of them, fiddling with his bed sheets between his fingers.

"And where did you hear about this?" he asked.

"Where else but James' parents?" Peter said.

"Your parents are in this Order?"

James shook his head with a disappointed frown.

"I don't think so actually," he said. "From what we could tell, Dumbledore asked them to be, but my parents turned him down. They must think they're too old or something."

Or maybe they just didn't want to get more involved in this whole thing than they needed to be. Remus couldn't have blamed them for it. Over the last year alone, the amount of deaths contributed to You-Know-Who and his followers had risen exponentially.

"It makes no sense," James burst out, unable to contain of his emotions. "My parents remember Grindelwald. They stood beside Dumbledore then. Why aren't they doing anything now?"

"They were a lot younger for Grindelwald," Remus pointed out.

"But Voldemort is just like Grindelwald was," James continued. "Have you read about that war? It's all the same. How can they sit by while You-Know-Who gains power and not do anything?"

"Who knows, mate?" Sirius said. "This is your parents we're talking about though. They have to have their reasons."

"So, what exactly is all this supposed to mean?" Remus asked, cutting Sirius off.

Sirius and James smirked at each other, while Peter frowned, and Remus already knew what was coming before anyone answered his question. He steeled himself.

"We're going to join," Sirius said, motioning between the four of them even though Remus hadn't agreed to such a scheme.

"We're seventeen," he shot back. "And we haven't even finished Hogwarts yet. Don't get ahead of yourself."

Sirius threw his head back in a laugh, looking as unabashed as Remus had known he would be.

"Maybe not now," James said, smirking but not laughing as Sirius was. "But after Hogwarts, when we're full-fledged wizards with our N.E.W.T.s under our belts, we have to join, Remus."

Remus couldn't help but snort, and he hoped he had successfully covered the fear he felt in the pit of his stomach.

"If Dumbledore wants to defeat Voldemort, he needs experts. People like Aurors and Ministry officials. He doesn't need four boys right out of Hogwarts."

"We became animagi at fifteen," Sirius said with a smirk. "Dumbledore would be lucky to have us."

"You all did that, not me," Remus said. "And you'd better hope Dumbledore never discovers it because he'd have no choice but to expel you. Somehow, I think that would actually hurt your chances with this Order, if it exists."

"It exists," James insisted.

Sirius nodded enthusiastically, but Peter looked far less sure of the whole thing as he chewed on his bottom lip.

"We did enough poking around this summer to know that much," Sirius pressed.

All Remus wanted was to figure out how he was going to make enough money to survive after Hogwarts, and his friends were trying to drag him into a war that had already placed a target on his back.

"Good for you," Remus concluded, standing from the bed and grabbing his school bag from where it was lying on the floor. "I'm off to the library to get a headstart on my Potions essay."

"It's Saturday!" Sirius called after him, but he was already out of the room and letting the door swing shut behind him.

Dear Frank,

How's Auror training going? I'm sure it's hard, but you were always going on about how excited you were to do good in the world. I hope it's everything you wanted it to be, and I'm sorry I didn't really write over the summer. Things at home were a little strange.

Things at Hogwarts are mostly the same as always, but classes are stressful. When you said seventh year would be worse than sixth, I'm not sure I believed you, but I do now. It sucks that you're not around to answer all my Potions questions anymore. Slughorn won't stop giving us more work.

To be honest, I've been feeling pretty jealous of you lately. You've been talking about being an Auror for as long as I can remember, but I still don't have a clue what to do after Hogwarts. All the professors, especially McGonagall, keep talking about our futures, and I'd rather not think about it. I don't know. Maybe something will click for me soon.

I know one thing: I'm definitely not joining you in the Auror Department.

But I'll stop boring you with my problems. I'm sure you're over Hogwarts troubles now that you're an "adult". I'd love to hear about your struggles in training since it'd be a nice distraction from my homework. If you're struggling that is.

Sincerely,

Remus Lupin

Remus' eyes scanned the shelves of the library as he moved closer to the present in the history section. James' words about Grindelwald had been running through his mind, and he felt a pressing need to learn more about the infamous dark wizard whom some called the precursor to Voldemort.

He already knew about Grindelwald of course. His father had lived through that war just as James' parents had, though he'd been too young to be as involved as they'd been. He hadn't finished Hogwarts when Dumbledore and Grindelwald had held their famous duel.

Though Remus had asked a few questions as a child, Lyall had never been forthcoming about his experiences during that chapter of wizarding history, and it hadn't taken long for Remus to figure out that it was because there were things about Grindelwald that Lyall didn't want to discuss with his son. It didn't take a genius to realize that Grindelwald must have had less than stellar views about werewolves, and Remus had begun to make it a point to not learn exactly what Grindelwald's views had been.

Lyall had never been able to hide the reports of Voldemort callously using werewolves from him while he was at Hogwarts though, and he knew that Grindelwald couldn't have been much different. Now he wanted to confirm it for himself.

There was no shortage of books about Grindelwald once he reached the 20th century. Title after title referenced the wizard's name, and Remus had trouble deciding which ones were worth being pulled from the shelf. He was struck by how new they looked compared to many of the other titles in the library, a reminder that Grindelwald hadn't been that long ago despite another dark wizard already rising to take his place.

As he scanned the books, Remus quickly realized that most of the writers on Grindelwald hadn't been overly concerned about his views on werewolves. He'd been expecting that. Though he chose the most promising looking books, he was scanning footnotes for any indication of Grindelwald's view of his "kind". A few of the books had indexes, and only one of those included werewolves. Remus flipped to the indicated page and was met with a brief reference to a group of werewolves killed in one of Grindelwald's attacks. The book made it sound as if they hadn't been targeted specifically but had instead been caught up in something much larger than themselves. Remus wasn't sure what to believe.

It was clear from the books that Grindelwald hadn't taken to recruiting so-called dark creatures like Voldemort had. At least, these writers didn't think he had, and Remus was sure many of the authors would have pounced on a way to hint that "dark" creatures were naturally drawn to dark wizards.

The real reason Remus had been keen to learn more about Grindelwald was to learn more about You-Know-Who and what his rise meant for Remus, but he didn't feel as if he had found the information he was looking for. None of the books he read had been written to reassure young werewolves of anything. With a sigh, he placed the last of the books back onto the shelf.

If there was anything to know about Grindelwald and werewolves, it wasn't in the Hogwarts library, and Remus felt no less lost than he had before.

His friends were eager to join the fight. At least, James and Sirius were. He knew Peter was less than enthusiastic but would join because James and Sirius would guilt him if he resisted. Remus wasn't sure about himself. He was more vulnerable than his friends. He thought that should have meant he would lead the charge.

But he didn't want to do that.

When Dumbledore had shown up at his house to inform him that he could attend Hogwarts, Remus had allowed himself to hope that he could live a normal life. He'd be able to find a job. Maybe he'd even make friends and have people who cared for him other than his parents, who still often looked regretful whenever they looked at him.

After O.W.L.s, when the reality of the forthcoming future with few job prospects had hit him, his hope had begun to wane, but it was Voldemort who he felt had shattered his hope into a million tiny pieces.

With a shaky breath, he retreated to the Transfiguration section, determined to start on his essay and pretend like his detour had never happened.

Sirius' tapping of the table made Remus take a deep breath. He slowly raised his gaze to look at Sirius and found the other boy staring into space, not noticing the distraction he was creating. A glance at the rest of the table showed him that James and Peter had noticed it too.

"Padfoot."

James reached out to shove at Sirius shoulder, and Sirius' head snapped around, eyes wide.

"What?"

"You won't stop tapping the table," Remus snapped.

"Oh." Sirius blinked. "Sorry, I guess."

Remus rolled his eyes.

"Have you gotten any work done?" he asked.

Sirius looked down at the parchment in front of him for a second. Remus could already see that nothing more than Sirius' name and the date was written on it.

"No," he admitted. "I'm bored."

James dropped his quill with a groan, reaching up to tug at his hair.

"We're all bored, Padfoot, but this essay is due in three days."

Sirius pouted, his bottom lip sticking out in a way that was far too distracting for Remus' liking.

"We haven't pulled a prank yet this term."

Sighing, Remus set his quill down, giving up hope of working on his essay until Sirius had aired his frustrations.

"When are we going to actually do something fun?" Sirius asked.

Remus and Peter looked to James. They were, after all, followers when it came to pranks. Those were the speciality of James and Sirius, who told the other boys where to be and what to do. But James didn't have the same excited glint in his eye that he typically got at the idea of mischief. He looked uncomfortable.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea," he said slowly.

When Sirius' mouth dropped open, James rushed to add, "I'm Head Boy now, and Lily's starting to take me seriously. I can't ruin it by pulling some ridiculous prank, Sirius. Not when I finally have a chance."

Sirius studied James for a moment before he deemed the boy a lost cause and turned to Peter and Remus instead.

"Boys?" he asked, leaning over the table. "You're in, right?"

Peter shrugged.

"Maybe James is right. If I get too many more detentions, what if no one wants to hire me after school?"

Remus was careful to hold Sirius' gaze.

"This essay is due in three days," he said flatly.

"And it's boring as hell."

"It's an important assignment, Padfoot. We can pull a prank once this is over with."

Sirius growled in frustration, collapsing back in his chair. He didn't do any work on his essay that afternoon, but he didn't say anything more about any pranks either.

Remus glanced apprehensively at Peter as he practiced transfiguring the cat into a clock. His friend was having his usual troubles, and Remus could see his frustration building. He crossed his fingers that it wouldn't be another day of building up Peter's crushed ego at the end of class as they often did after Transfiguration.

He's been amazed that any of his friends became animagi in their fifth year, but Peter doing it, even with the help of James and Sirius, had been so remarkable that Remus still had to remind himself it was true sometimes.

Sure enough, Peter's cat did nothing except turn a darker shade of brown and develop stripes that somewhat resembled wood. It was a nice start, but not where Peter should have been after almost an entire lesson's worth of practice.

Remus was leaning over to whisper some advice when Severus Snape's voice carried across the classroom.

"Yours may be misshapen, Avery, but at least I can tell it's a clock. Only an idiot would still have a cat on their desk."

Remus shut his eyes, knowing without having to look that James and Sirius had snapped to attention at the comment. He heard the hurt whimper from Peter and cursed Snape for knowing exactly which buttons to press.

"Lo—"

When Sirius' words were abruptly broken off, Remus opened his eyes to find a surprised Sirius looking at James, who had laid his hand on Sirius' shoulder and was watching Snape with narrowed eyes. Snape glowered back, daring James to do something.

McGonagall was on them in a flash, standing between them and Snape as if her physical presence had been enough to stop them from hurling hurtful words—or worse—at each other in the past.

"Everyone progresses at different rates, Mr Snape," McGonagall said sharply, her back on the Marauders as she glared at the other boy. "There will be no insulting anyone's hard work in my class."

Snape nodded, but it was clear to everyone in the room that it was a placating gesture. Everyone was watching him as if they expected him to shoot a cunning remark back at McGonagall, but he was quiet, his eyes still intent on James.

The two boys were still staring each other down, and Remus' back was straight as he watched James from behind, waiting for the comeback he had up his sleeve.

His first detention as Head Boy was destined to be earned in a room full of his peers. They were all waiting for it. James Potter not serving detention was like a ballerina not performing ballet.

There was a long, tense moment where you could have heard a pin drop before James spoke, earning gasps from a few students.

"That's a very nice clock, Snape. Nice work."

Remus' mouth dropped open.

He couldn't see James' face because he was turned towards Snape, but he wished that he could. The words had held little animosity. Even McGonagall spun around, staring at James with one eyebrow raised. She had clearly expected to have to scold him, and she'd been robbed of the opportunity. Recovering quickly, she gave James an approving, if confused, nod and made her way back to her desk, though she hesitated a few times on the way as she debated turning back.

Nothing changed when she left, though, except that Snape had a clearer view of James that he could use to continue glaring. His dark eyes sent a shiver down Remus' spine. He held few memories from his many transformations, but the terrified look in those same eyes as Snape had believed he was about to die was one memory Remus couldn't forget.

James turned back to his clock, working on adding more decoration to the already rather gaudy-looking model he had. It was as if he couldn't sense Snape's glare, and the other boy soon gave up and turned back to his own clock.

Remus caught Lily watching James, mouth partially open, and she blushed a deep crimson when their eyes met and she realized she'd been caught. Remus gave her a gentle smile and shrugged in a, "Who would have thought?" gesture. She gave a short, quiet laugh that James didn't seem to hear.

The way James had held himself back from going after Snape had surprised him, but the way he hadn't glanced Lily's way even once during or after the exchange shocked him even more.

Remus allowed himself a small grin before he turned to the dejected looking Peter, who was listening to some elaborate story Sirius had suddenly begun telling and trying to smile.

Dear Remus,

Sorry this response is kinda late. Auror training is killer. It might be more intense than I expected if I'm honest, but I'm pulling through. Alice is always around to help me out. She makes everything look easy. Like always.

I totally get that being an Auror isn't for everyone, but you'd make a good one if you wanted to join, Remus. I feel like I'd be failing the department if I didn't put some effort into recruiting you. It's all hands on deck at the moment, as I'm sure you could guess.

Honestly, I think Auror training is one of the easiest parts of my life now. Most of us are so busy outside our training that it makes the training worse. Almost everyone here wanted to be Aurors since they were little, and most of us didn't guess there'd be, you know, a war going on while we were training.

Try to enjoy your last year at Hogwarts. I get being nervous about what's after, but you deserve to have fun this year. Merlin knows I miss the castle and not having responsibilities. Can you believe I even miss McGonagall's nagging me a little? She seems like the nicest woman compared to the trainers here. They're ruthless. (But don't tell her any of that.)

I hope everyone back at Hogwarts is good. Oh, I almost forgot! If you're having trouble with Potions without me around, Alice thinks you should ask Lily. She says she'd be up for it, and I hear she's better at Potions than I am. I think it's a good idea.

Sincerely,

Frank Longbottom

Word count: 3,419