The Life for Which You Are Looking

by hmweasley

As his seventh year begins, Remus feels as if his life has become little more but a countdown to despair. War is raging outside the walls of Hogwarts, and werewolves are increasingly siding with Voldemort, which has extinguished any hope Remus had of getting a decent job, even with Outstandings on all of his N.E.W.T.s. His expectations aren't high, and they may just get even lower.

26. Interlude: Unchecked Resentment Grows

Word count: 447

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Interlude 9: Peter Pettigrew

Unchecked Resentment Grows

Planning Remus' birthday part was not how Peter wanted to spend his Friday night. He understood that planning parties was a thing friends did, but he didn't enjoy the process. It was a necessary evil that he would have forgotten to do if James and Sirius hadn't been on top of it, ready to plan a party for any occasion.

The fact that Remus' patrol duties happened to be scheduled for a Friday was a fluke, but it was one that Peter hated, especially when James had helped make the decision once upon a time. Of all the days of the week it could have been, he had to spend his Friday evening listening to Sirius come up with wild idea after wild idea for how to spend Remus' birthday.

"I don't think he'd want anyone singing," Peter said, rolling his eyes at Sirius idea to hire a barbershop quartet like he'd seen in one of the Muggle movies he'd watched over the summer. If Peter was already annoyed over the party planning, he hated the reminder that Sirius had gone behind their back and had a secret boyfriend for months without them knowing.

Sirius pouted over Peter flat out rejecting another one of his ideas, which only made Peter clench his fist down at his side where his friends couldn't see it. Each idea Sirius through out was more absurd than the last, but he didn't care because it was Remus they were celebrating. Remus who was good, kind, and intelligent. Remus who deserved to have the best birthday ever. Peter couldn't point out that they hadn't done anything nearly as cool for his birthday several months earlier because doing so would make him look like the one in the wrong, not his friends who so clearly had favourites.

Peter knew it was wrong of him to feel resentment towards Remus, who probably would have preferred no party at all over everyone making a big deal of it, but knowing his feelings were wrong didn't stop Peter from feeling them. They were there, gripping his heart, and he couldn't shake them.

Sirius started describing the cake he wanted to ask the house elves to make for them, complete with two different fillings and loads of chocolate decorating the top. It was nothing like the plain vanilla birthday cake Peter had received with the most generic message of "Happy birthday, Peter!" written in red and gold icing.

Peter flopped back on his bed with a loud sigh, staring at the ceiling as Sirius continued describing the cake with sweeping hand motions. Neither of his friends paid any attention to him as he stopped responding to the conversation.