I straight up have no words for this. It was for Dragon's (dragonshost) Plot Bucket Challenge on Tumblr. Basically, we got a pairing and three prompts and had to come up with something. It seemed like a good idea at the time... Until I saw what I'd been given.

Anyway. I couldn't work on anything else, so I decided to get this out of the way. Reminder for those that haven't yet seen them, both APS and S&S were updated, so yay for progress! Also, don't forget about BixCo week in October!

Prompt: Laki x Gray. Red Herring; Great Battle; Major Injury Underreaction.

Plot Bucket Challenge

The entire thing had just been one big cluster-fuck of chaos and carnage and then even more chaos.

The guild had been reduced to nothing but splinters and nails. The town had almost become a mountain of rubble and roof-tiles. And somewhere, there was a great, big, hunk of dragon on top of it all. Where Acnologia's body had landed, no one was really sure just yet. But knowing their luck, it would've been right over Kardia Cathedral. It was bad enough the town and the church had still been trying to clean up after the events of Tartaros, but now they had to deal with a dragon corpse and rebuild everything again?

Everyone in Fairy Tail already knew that they'd be lucky to be allowed to rebuild the guild again after all of the destruction they'd brought to that corner of Fiore.

Still, buildings weren't the only things to be destroyed that time. They'd lost lives that time. And while some had been lucky to avoid getting but a single scratch on them, others had come so close that they'd stared death itself right in its cold, lifeless eyes.

Gray was one of those people. First it had been with Juvia and Invel. And then… Well, Gray wasn't really too sure what had happened to him the second time. But one minute, he'd been fine and celebrating with some of the guild over the literal fall of Acnologia, and the next… The next minute, he'd been looking down to find a splintered piece of wood piercing him right in the middle of his abdomen.

He really didn't know what it had happened. Maybe it had been when Acnologia had destroyed the ships, and he'd been too worried about making sure Lucy's and everyone else's plan succeeded that he hadn't noticed getting hurt. Whatever the case was, it didn't change the fact that he presently had a giant fucking piece of wood sticking through him.

As long as I can find Wendy, I'll be fine. Wendy could fix everything. She was Wendy, after all. Although Gray didn't know where she was, which was probably going to prove to be just a little bit of a problem.

He looked down again and tried grasping the plank of wood. Tiny splinters dug into his palm but the slight sting of them piercing the rough skin was nothing compared to the burning pain he felt when he tried pulling the whole piece out of his stomach. He doubled over in pain for a moment, only wincing when it made the pain worse, and he took a few deep, pained breaths.

It was fine. He'd dealt with worse. As long as he got the plank out and patched himself up with ice until he found Wendy, he'd be fine. Totally fine. One-hundred percent A-OK.

When he tried pulling it out again, Gray could feel it being moved. He swore he could feel every single splinter of it ripping off and getting caught inside him. He knew that it had gone straight through to his back as well, because he could feel the warm gush of blood running down from the open wound over his cold sweat-slicked skin. Gray figured it was best to take a moment to deal with one side at a time, so he reached behind himself, touching his palm to where the large, narrow wound was just above his right hip, to cover it with ice and stop it from getting any worse.

Everyone else was still cheering and celebrating as Gray continued to slowly tug the plank out of himself. He thought it was a good thing, really. People would overreact – especially Juvia – and really, it was unnecessary. He was fine. But one person turned at just the right move to see the Ice-Make mage pull the last of the blood-stained, splintered plank out of his abdomen, before he dropped the dangerously sharp piece to the stone ground.

Laki pulled herself away from the crowd to rush over to Gray. She almost had to tear her eyes away from the piece of timber – so sharp, and the grain… Oh, it had such a pretty grain. She looked back to Gray, to where he held his hand over the gaping wound just beside his navel. Crimson spilled between his fingers and down to seep into the fabric of his pants despite how hard he tried to apply pressure and get the bleeding to slow down.

"My god, Gray," Laki whispered. "How the hell did you manage to become a human kebab?"

He shrugged a little as he held himself up against the wall with his free hand, hobbling along. "Dunno, really," he mumbled. He kept looking down to his hand and he frowned when he realised that he couldn't form any more ice. That was just another small problem. "Do you know where Wendy is?"

His words were just a little slurred then, but only slightly. Laki stepped closer just to try and stop Gray from continuing to move. Where he was trying to go, she had no clue. "Haven't the slightest idea," she said. She grabbed his hand to pull it away from the wall and then moved her hands up to his shoulders. "Gray, seriously man, just sit down."

"What? Why? I'm fine."

"You have a hole the size of an encyclopedia in your stomach. You're not fine."

Gray shrugged a little again. Okay, so it was pretty big. It was just narrow. "I've had worse."

Laki managed to force Gray to the ground after a little struggling, propping him up on a pile of rubble she covered with her cape so it didn't dig in to his back too much. She knew her magic wasn't suited to healing or treating any kind of injury, but she'd spent enough time around Gildarts to know basic first aid for those kinds of situations. Prying Gray's hand away, she managed to finally get a decent look at his wound. And really, how the man could still think he was fine, Laki had no idea. He was quite possibly the opposite of fine.

She shook her head at him as she ripped off a section of her cape on the ground just to try and soak up some of the excess blood at the entry wound before she covered it with her hands. "I really doubt you've had worse," Laki muttered. Still, Laki wondered just what she was supposed to do for Gray. It wouldn't be long before everyone else noticed, of course, but still, their guild wasn't particularly known for having healer-type mages. They really only had a few, with Wendy's magic being the most suitable for all kinds of injuries.

But Laki's thoughts were momentarily interrupted as something falling from the sky caught her eye. And then out of nowhere, a single red herring landed right down on the pavement next to the pavement, flopping once, twice, before it stopped still.

Gray only thought he was hallucinating.