Summary:

Wacky Patrick's Day fic with Royai and Parental!Roy! This falls right into my New Beginnings universe. You don't need to have read it. All you need to know is Roy has taken over guardianship of Elric brothers and it is a modern au, where Roy and the team are police officers.

Prompt from runningalchemist on Tumblr. Thanks again for the awesome prompt.

Prompt 51: What the hell are you wearing?

I own nothing! Arakawa Sensei owns it all.

The ties that bind

Roy frowned at his reflection. The offensive green tie in his hand goaded him.

Kiss me, I'm Irish. Seriously – what the hell!

A grimace on his face, he knotted the tie. He should have known better than to take on Edward and Alphonse in a bet. Not only did he humiliate himself in the bike race against Edward, now he had the ill luck of having to don the tie in the office for the week. Of course, Hughes was really the one to blame; he sent the tie along with a scrawled invitation from little Elicia inviting Roy and the two boys up to Central for a St Patrick's Day parade. The boys had never seen one before and had talked about nothing else for a few days. The only parades the boys had seen back in Resembool were farmers moving sheep from one field into another.

Roy descended the stairs and entered the kitchen where Edward and Alphonse were eating their breakfast. The two boys looked up at his entrance and began to laughing into their cereal.

"Suits you," said Ed. "I think Miss Hawkeye will like it, won't she Ed?" Alphonse poked his brother in the ribs.

"Sure," Edward said without enthusiasm.

Roy rolled his eyes. "Well, she'll get a good laugh out of it." He sighed heavily. "And so will everyone else."

"I wasn't sure you would follow through." Alphonse poured a cup of coffee for Roy.

"Thanks." Roy took the mug gratefully and sipped the scalding, black coffee. He looked at Alphonse from over his mug. "Mmm. Of course I am. I always keep my promises."

Two years ago, Roy wouldn't have been caught dead wearing such a ridiculous tie in case he would lose the respect of his team. But now he knew there respect and taking oneself too seriously were not one and the same. The boys had taught him that.

Roy was determined not to draw attention to the tie when he entered the precinct. It didn't work. Cat calls, whistles and giggles accompanied him every step of the way. He held his head high and walked with his usual swagger.

Roy opened the door to the office he shared with his team, which was empty except for this second in command.

Riza raised an eyebrow the moment he walked in.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Go on, you can say it."

"What the hell are you wearing?" She bit her trembling lip, and Roy knew she was doing her utmost not to laugh.

"I don't think I need to tell you," he said. "Can't you tell by the grinning leprechaun?"

"Maybe I'd like to hear you say it?"

She walked over to where he stood by his desk and held the tie in her hand. Up close Roy could smell her perfume. "Kiss me I'm Irish. Shouldn't that say 'Kiss me I'm Amestrian'?"

Roy gulped, his tongue darting out and licking at his lips. "Would that make a difference?"

She was silent for a moment while his eyes bored into hers. The urge to kiss her was overwhelming but he couldn't find the courage to do so.

"That would be telling," she said letting go of his tie.

She moved away in the direction of her desk, smiling over her shoulder at him. Beautiful, he thought, So beautiful.

"Riza!" The words escaped hid lips before he could stop them.

"What is it?"

Before he could answer, the door of the office swung open and Roy bit back a curse at the timing. Havoc, Breda, Fuery and Falman had returned after lunch.

Havoc was the first to notice the tie. Mouth agape, he did a double take before saying, "Looking real smooth Boss."

"Yes – well I did wear it especially for you."

Fuery practically shoved his first in his mouth to prevent laughter, but Falman and Breda had no such restraint.

Breda doubled over with laughter. "It's just as well, you're not going to pick up any women in that tie."

Roy groaned inwardly. If it wasn't for their impeccable time, he might just be proving Breda wrong right now.

He puffed out his chest. "A wise man once said women like men who can laugh at themselves."

Falman frowned. "I do not recall hearing that quote. Who?"

"Edward Elric!"

Everyone laughed.

Fin