3
Ianto and Jack exit a neighbourhood bistro. Stroll down the street.
Ianto is irritated "Okay, if they're going to have a sauce, put something in it besides flour and chicken broth..."
Quietly Jack sighs which shows this is not a new complaint "It was a veal stock, I thi..."
"Well, it wasn't a reduction like you do it!" Ianto snorts "Boiling down half a ton of bones..."
Jack is thinking of something. Ianto's watching that. "The way you cook. If you could make love, I'd marry you."
Softly Jack says "We have to talk."
Ianto is happy and laughs "Uh-oh. I mention marriage, all of a sudden... (ominous Nazi Baritone) Ve haff to ta..."
"I didn't want to spoil our supper..."
"You'd rather spoil our walk home." Ianto's' smile fades.
"Yeh, it's cheaper."
"Okay, what?"
Jack says it all in a one breath of rush "I just found out I have to go to Boston to get a deposition. I might not be back until Saturday."
Mock horror as Ianto squeals "So I'll have to order in?"
Dropping the other shoe, Jack adds "We have the kids this weekend, so..."
Softly Ianto sighs "Jesus."
Jack glances over...
"I thought it was her weekend." Ianto slumps "Do I ever see you alone?"
Jack draws a breath. The concern is behind his eyes. "Anyway, I thought...while I'm gone... maybe I'll hire in some help."
"For what?"
"Just a babysitter - I mean...you're working..." Jack flounders.
"I can take them to work with me – I can shift things around …" Ianto brushes it off.
"You don't need to. I don't expect you to handle them yourself."
Ianto huffs "Can't handle them myself is what you mean. Can't."
Maybe he's right. Because Jack doesn't say anything. Ianto is hurt and he gapes at Jack "You don't trust me to be alone with them."
Jack splutters "I trust you of course I do but …"
"But? But what?"
"But you're not good at this. Not yet." Jack admits, then grimaces at the pain on Ianto's face "I'm sorry."
"I know how responsible, caring adults parent children." Ianto tries flippant "I'm gonna bribe 'em. Buy 'em a dog or something. Maybe a Doberman."
Jack loves him. But this problem is real.
"Look. I know they hate me." Ianto says after the silence becomes unnerving.
"They don't hate you"
"And what you're telling them is keep hating me - keep up the good work" Ianto snaps.
"Nobody's telling them to hate you"
"Really?" Ianto laughs sarcastically "Look in your ex-wife's eyes."
"It's complicated for Gwen. It's complicated for me...You don't have kids - you don't understand…" Jack is cut off with Ianto swinging to face him, the anger now evident.
"Oh right" Ianto loudly exclaims "So it's just complicated for you and Gwen - for me it's pretty simple 'cause I just don't understand..."
"No you don't. And I'm not gonna screw with my kids heads right now" Jack is firing back and Ianto feels the sting like a verbal slap, turning away.
Ianto starts to walk again, throwing over his shoulder "You know I don't need another person in this family making me feel like an idiot...your ex-wife's doing a bang up job and I have to face it every Tuesday and Thursday and every other goddamn weekend and I just don't know how the hell you were married to her for so goddamn long! Jesus what did you see in her? I don't get it - I just don't get it."
They've reached their building. As they enter Jack sighs "She's a great mother."
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The door of the freight elevator clangs open. As Ianto and Jack step out into their loft, the phone is ringing. he looks to Jack. Then runs to snatch it up "Hello?"
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Toshiko sits in her closet with a phone in her closet. Hearing Ianto, she hangs up. A pink POST IT creeps under the door.
CAN I JOIN YOU FOR DESSERT IN THE CLOSET? VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE YOGURT. PLEASE CHECK ONE.
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The most beautiful little puppy in the world - sitting in a puddle of pee on a hardwood floor.
"Aw George...not again... who wants to help clean up this time?" Ianto is speaking in an overly zealous voice "Toshiko?"
He looks around - completely exhausted. It's late. Toshiko is videotaping the dog pee. Owen's in the kitchen talking to himself. He pours and sprinkles, working intently on a magic potion.
"Why do you make that face when you talk to me?" she imitates Ianto "And that voice you use...you think I'm deaf or something?"
Owen ZAPS the magic potion theatrically with his fingertips.
Reaching for her, Ianto sighs "I'm sorry, okay? Let's not fi..."
"Don't touch me! I'm allergic to you!" She starts sneezing furiously and scratching. Owen comes out of the kitchen carrying a steaming cup of potion.
"Those who travel far and near this will make you DISAPPEAR!" Owen says theatrically.
"I have to work on my video project! Don't follow me! I can put myself to bed." She races upstairs. Ianto follows. So does Owen. And George.
"Excuse me" Owen calls out.
Ianto is following her into Toshiko's room "Toshiko let's get something clear."
"I don't have to listen to you! You're not my mother."
"Thank God for that!" he leaves the room SLAMMING the door behind him. Takes a breath, turns, and walks back in. "What I meant and perhaps I didn't say it well was you have a great mom. You don't need another one. But when you're at this house …"
"This is my daddy's house"
"This is my house too!" Ianto spits before he can stop himself.
"And this is my room so get out!" Toshiko screams.
"Excuse me." Owen calls from the landing again. Ianto throws open the door. Owen stands there innocently. "I made you some cocoa. See?"
"Thank you Owen. That was so sweet of you." Ianto sighs, then says pointedly to Toshiko "Goodnight Toshiko. Sweet dreams."
Ianto leads Owen to his room. With Ianto safe out of sight, Toshiko takes the puppy into her arms and cuddles it.
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Ianto, dead on his feet, reads "Goodnight Moon" to Owen. "In the great green room there was a telephone and a red balloon..."
"Aren't you going to drink your cocoa?" Owen asks "It's the good kind."
Faking a big sip Ianto hums "Mmmm! Tasty. You're a master chef Owen. Just like your dad."
Owen points to the book - he 'reads' skipping pages, a hundred miles an hour desperate to get to the end of the book. ""Goodnight moon, goodnight hush, goodnight mush, goodnight goodnight goodnight Gracie - Goodnight Owen!"
"No! You're cheating - you have to start from the beginning and you have to read the whole thing I can't sleep otherwise." Owen's eyes are glued to him. He lays down next to him, yawns.
"In the great green room there was a telephone and a red balloon..."
"And a picture of the cow jumping over the moon..." Owen picks up the story he knows by heart.
laying his head down, Ianto sighs "That's nice Owen."
Owen reads until Ianto's asleep. He looks at him in AWE.
"Ianto! Ianto!"
No response. Ianto's really asleep. He lifts his head. It flops down! In horror he jumps off the bed and with a quick look back, races from the room, and...Darts down the hallway, bumping into walls - He LEAPS inside Toshiko's room, slamming the door behind him.
"Owen! What's wrong?"
Owen bellows triumphantly "I killed him!"
Owen and Toshiko gape at one another, stunned.