14

NEWARK AIRPORT

Arriving passengers are filling through the gate. Last, is a female Flight Attendant, Wheeling a gray-faced Gwen in a collapsible wheelchair. The woman leans to her "We'll get your bags, and the taxis are just..."

Gwen grips the wheel, stopping them. Stares, frozen, as across the way...three faces stare back.

Ianto gives a sheepish "Surprise?"

And Gwen LEAPS out of the wheelchair, runs across the distance, runs to scoop her babies in her arms "It's a miracle! I can walk!"

Toshiko laughs. Owen covers Gwen with kisses. Ianto watches.

From the crowd.

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Ianto carrying the suitcase, Gwen has each kid by the hand, as they troop through the house to arrive at...Gwen's bedroom. Where Gwen freezes. Her mouth open. For Ianto has hung striking black and white photos of the children all over the room. One is of Owen's FEET, left shoe on right foot and vice-versa. Another glimpses Toshiko's beautiful face hidden in her hair. Owen sitting in a cupboard. Toshiko a bold ear of corn. Owen sitting on the bottom limb of the huge evergreen. Toshiko kissing her horse's muzzle.

Gwen just stands. Trying not to cry. "Okay. These are good."

"I helped." Owen admits.

She knows he did. Looks across the room at Ianto. No more words.

Let's go to the park!" Owen demands.

Gwen sighs. Smiles down at him. "I've got a lot of medicine in me, sweetie. And I'm a little wobbly for driving or running ar..."

"Yan can do that part." Owen says insistently.

Gwen absorbs that. And all it portends.

Softly Ianto says "Hon, maybe your mom would like t..."

"..go to the park. In the worst way." Gwen ends.

Silence.

Toshiko grins "Well, with Ianto driving. That's how we'll go."

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Five swings in use. In four, the kids are pushed by moms or nannies. In the fifth, Owen is pushed by Toshiko. Guess who's going the highest. Two parents on a bench. Under a starkly bare tree. Gwen is drinking in the air, the cold, the day. Ianto watching that. "Serene. You're getting the hang of it."

Gwen doesn't answer for a beat. Almost as if she hasn't heard.

"Serene means you accept." Shakes her head. Calmly replies "Part of me hasn't quit yet. And the other part is still pretty outraged…When it's not terrified."

Watching the world of moms and kids. Who are not terrified Gwen adds "I'm thinking. Do I know you well enough to really chew you out?"

"No." Ianto says with a bland expression.

Gwen turns to him. Diamond laser glare "Have you lost your mind?! You fought years for that job! And you quit?"

"Oh. That." Ianto grimaces "It's just not the right time t..."

"Do what you've worked your whole life to do?"

"It was just a job, there'll be plenty of others."

"You mean, after I'm dead?" Gwen challenges and Ianto flinches. "Do you?"

Ianto leans in "Hey, you haven't quit on you, I'm sure as hell not gonna. I just mean, I'm juggling a lot right n..."

"Juggle it!" she replies "Move the darkroom into your house. You've got that room downstairs with the treadmill Jack never uses anyway. Don't lose your confidence. Don't lose your edge."

"It's the same choice you made."

"Yes. I made the choice that was right for me. And I don't regret it. But even for me, there were days when I felt so lost, so invisible. And then I'd hate myself for the kids not being enough."Reading Ianto's face. She speaks softer "I know you, huh? The car pools, the measles, the PTA. It's not gonna be enough for you in the long run. You have to think long term."

"I just want to spend time with them when I'm not rushing or on the phone or tired or..."

"That's parenthood. That's the job, with or without a career. I'm telling you the biggest gift you can give them is your happiness. They need you to be happy. Can you hear me?" she sighs "Cause if you're not, the easiest person to blame is the guy sleeping next to you. And you'll push him away, and then hate him even more when he goes, until finally you have no choice but to leave. And that can't happen."

Ianto's turn to wonder. He starts to say something, thinks better of it. Asks instead "That's the bottom line, isn't it? I can't make a mistake. Because it'll screw your kids."

Gwen does not answer so he glances over "My advice to you? Don't die."

"Feeling the pressure?" she sneers with fake annoyance Ianto know knows it just a front.

Ianto's eyes move across Gwen's face. Then, out to Owen, on the distant swings. "Last time I pushed him? He said, 'Higher, Yan. It makes my penis sting.'"

Thin smile. Now it's Gwen watching Ianto's profile.

Ianto continues "I'm gonna buy him that white dove for Christmas. If I don't, you'll get him a fucking eagle!"

Gwen keeps watching him. And in a quiet voice shares "Owen was born in two hours, went right to my breast and camped there for three days. Always with this...mischievous look..."

Watches Ianto nodding, absorbing. "Somehow, his blanket always looked like a cape, even the nurse said that. He loves to hear that story, over and over. How he was born a magician."

Softly, never turning Ianto whispers "and her...?"

"Took 28 hours. She just wasn't sure about entering this world. Almost killed her surrogate… and me waiting" Watches the feeling well in Ianto's eyes. Ianto nods. It fits. "That's who she is. Don't let anybody rush her."

Silence. A murmur from Ianto "I'll keep that in mind."

Ianto settles back. His eyes now locked away somewhere private.

Quietly Gwen asks "What?"

Yan smiles. Amused that Gwen sensed something. "It's not about the kids."

Looks over. Decides whether to ask "That thing you said before. Pushing the guy sleeping next to you away. Because of what you gave up for motherhood..."

"Is that what he told you?"

"He won't discuss it. Just calls it history." Ianto shrugs. Accepts she will probably not tell him either.

A trace of edge to Gwen's smile. But no real anger. "Well, he got that part right."

Looking. Looking. Ianto squints "So what's the part he got wrong?"

An urgency in that as Ianto leans closer "I got all day."

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Jack and his bulky briefcase, coming down the stone steps two at a time, until he sees him. In his winter coat. Smoking as if it could keep him warm. And despite the tension, he grins, heads over. "What a great surpri..."

"Hold your applause. We're not having fun, here." And from Ianto's face he means every word.

Concerned Jack asks "Is Gwen okay?"

Great. Just what he wants to hear. "Oh yeh, she was cracking me up. Dishing details of her sordid marriage breakup."

Ah. A beat. To assess the damage. Jack sighs "And you freaked. A little. Hey..."

"Just like to make sure." Ianto continues "That your past. And my future. Are real different."

Jack promises quietly "Well, they will be."

Ianto drolls hard and low "Imagine my relief. So what's for dinner?"

He sighs. Jesus. "Why in the world would she t..."

"You took a fishing trip with the boys. Liked it so much, you took another."

"I needed some time away." Jack says lamely.

"...while she watched the kids. Then, you booked this flat in Paris for your family's summer. But she said..."

Jack is weary now "...the kids have camp. Their friends are here. Over there, I'll just be shopping in a language I don't even know. My life, and the kids' lives, aren't here to service your mid-life crisis.' Did it go like that?"

It did. People are passing them. They do not notice. Jack shrugs "She called it a fight. The fight."

"What do you call it?" Ianto snorts "You told her you had doubts."

Jack looks around. People are moving on. Toward their drinks, their dinners, their lives. "Can we go sit somewhere?"

"Let me put it this way. Hell, no." And takes out his cigarettes. His fingers fumble slightly. It isn't the cold.

"I told her I loved her."

"By way of saying you were unhappy."

"Restless." Jack amends.

"Excuse me. 'Things are so confusing for me, Jack. Our life feels too comfortable, too safe, too predictable. It's a partnership, it's juggling schedules. When I think of playing that out, every day, for the rest of my life...' you told her that too" Ianto looks dead at his eyes.

And he nods. Once. Whispers softly "'...I don't know if I can make it.'

That's what I said. But I didn't leave."

"No, she threw you out. What a difficult woman." Pulls out a box of matches. "So now I get to wait...(A single match_)...For the first sign. The first fishing trip... (STRIKES it. Shields it from the wind.) What do you figure, Jack? When am I too old to be exciting? When your daughter brings home her college roommate?"

Lights his cigarette. As he watches.

Softly Jack snarls "That's a pretty ugly thing you just said."

"No, here's ugly. 'I love you, babe. It's just our life together I'm not so sure about...' right?" Big draw. Never wavering from his eyes. "'But keep dancing, and if you're lucky, I might just never leave, who knows?' yeah?"

"That's not us."

"Because you've changed so much." Ianto nods.

He puts his hands on Ianto, gently. But he flinches. So the hands come away.

"You want me to show you the future. Well, I can't darlin'. I can't." Jack sighs as Ianto searches the lovelight in his eyes. As if he could weigh it "We make our lives, one step at a time. We do the best we can. The truth about the future? A promise. Is only a hope."

"How about the promises we make to our kids? About their future. Do we shrug those off, just that easily?" That slows him down. "Maybe Toshiko deserves to find out who really broke up her family. While her mom is still around."

Stops him. Cold.

Ianto adds a quiet "Hey. Just a thought."

Ianto flips his cigarette to the gutter. Shrugs. "You got one less for dinner."

Takes a step back. Only one. But it registers.

"Where you goin'?" Jack asks with obvious dismay.

"I'm gonna get me a drink." Nods, to himself. "And I'm gonna drink it alone."

And he walks off.

Slow.