Chapter 2. Meetings

The second time Suzaku woke up, he was very clearly no longer in Shestal's facility. He opened his eyes to the sight of clear, blue skies, and felt no pain whatsoever.

Had he died? What had happened with Shestal and Lelouch?

A memory flashed through his mind. When his soul returns, I will hold it in my hands, and Lelouch vi Britannia will belong to me.

Dear God... Once again, he'd failed Lelouch. Shestal had managed to exploit Suzaku's selfishness, and now... Now, it was entirely possible that Lelouch's soul was at that bastard's mercy.

For a few seconds, the only thing Suzaku could do was sit there and helplessly hyperventilate. If he was right, if Shestal had managed to enslave Lelouch. The very thought was too repugnant to fathom.

His sole hope was that C.C. would come back and help. She had had a significant change of heart after the episode in the world of C with the Ragnarok Connection and had decided to help them despite the fact that Lelouch could not take her code or fulfill her wish. She loved Lelouch in her own way. She would not allow something like that to happen to him. Suzaku... Suzaku had to believe that.

At the same time, though, Suzaku had never been a quitter, or somewhat to sit idly by and do nothing. So after those few moments passed, he gathered the remnants of his composure.

He removed his mask—because it was useless right now—and allowed himself to take a deep breath. The air smelled nice, almost sweet. It was familiar, comforting, in a way very few things were as of late.

He took a good look around, and that was when he realized it. He was in something that looked alarmingly like Jeremiah's orange farm. What? Why? Why in the world would he be here?

Granted, the orangery was one of the few places where he could take off his mask and speak about Lelouch freely, but that was a mixed blessing. He visited Lelouch's grave when he had the chance, but that hurt too. He couldn't fathom why his afterlife would be a recreation of the place.

Seriously, why couldn't things be straightforward for once in his damn life... or death?

But there was no point in just standing here, bemoaning his failures and lost chances. He had to get moving and see if there was still something to salvage out of this disaster.

His chances of accomplishing anything at all were slim at best. He knew that even as he got up and started making his way through the orangery.

And yet, against all odds, it only took him a few minutes to find hope again. It happened so suddenly. He was walking up a path he didn't even remember existed when all of a sudden, he caught sight of a very familiar figure.

It was Lelouch, and he was idly poking a flower with something akin to confusion on his face. He looked just like Suzaku remembered him, dressed in his black Ashford uniform, and so beautiful it hurt.

Suzaku must have made some kind of noise, because Lelouch was drawn out of his careful scrutiny of the flower and looked up. His eyes widened upon seeing Suzaku. "Suzaku? Is that you?"

Suzaku nodded, too dazed to do much else. Almost instantly, Lelouch jogged to his side and hugged him. Suzaku hugged him back, because he couldn't not do it, couldn't keep himself from holding Lelouch close, as close as he possibly could.

Did this mean Lelouch's soul was safe? Maybe Shestal's plan to enslave Lelouch had failed. Lelouch always had been very stubborn and really, there was no guarantee that Lelouch would come back from the dead just because Suzaku wanted him to.

Relief exploded through Suzaku. Maybe it wasn't exactly what he had wanted to accomplish, but he'd take his blessings where he could find them. And really, at this point, as much as he'd wanted to keep his word to Lelouch and preserve the Requiem, he couldn't say he really regretted dying either.

He had done his best. Someone else could pick up the mask now that he was dead. He could stay here, be with Lelouch. Be at peace. Yes, this was for the best. This was perfect.

Oblivious to Suzaku's thoughts, Lelouch broke away from the embrace. "What is this place?" he asked. "Are we dead?"

"Uh... I don't know."

That wasn't true in the slightest. In fact, there was at least a 99% chance that they were, indeed, dead.

Lelouch must've guessed that too, despite Suzaku's vague response, because his face fell. "I'm so sorry, Suzaku," he said, tearing up slightly. "I... It was my fault those soldiers... Those soldiers attacked you. I made an oath to obliterate Britannia, and instead... Instead, I ended up getting you killed. For nothing."

He clenched his fists, hissing in something like helpless fury. "It's like a bad joke. Seven years. Seven years I wondered if you were alive or dead. I hoped. And then, when we're finally reunited, like we were always supposed to be... This... This is the result..."

Wait... What?

"I can't believe... Why would this happen? How could we... How could I... Nunnally..."

He was almost incoherent with rage and grief, and Suzaku could barely understand his words. Still, it was obvious that something was wrong in this picture.

He took hold of Lelouch's arm and squeezed it slightly, just enough to draw Lelouch's attention without causing him pain. "Lelouch? What's the last thing you remember?"

The words snapped Lelouch out of his furious trance. "What do you mean?" he asked. "The Shinjuku ghettoes, of course. Clovis's guard shot you down." He pressed his hand over Suzaku's rib, where his old injury had been. "Here. Don't you remember, Suzaku?"

Oh, yes, he remembered. Except that had been years back, before Zero, before Geass, before everything had gone so very wrong.

"Suzaku?"

Suzaku didn't have the chance to reply to the now concerned inquiry. The sound of a familiar voice reached their ears.

"Come now, don't be shy... You know you're interested."

"It's not that," another very familiar voice replied—and oh dear, this isn't good. "I just... I'm not really sure what... is happening..."

"We can find out later... once we take care of that..."

He and Lelouch shared a look, then, as one, rushed toward the source of the sound. It was a nearby clearing, and as soon as they stepped beyond the treeline, they were met with a rather... interesting sight.

It was... themselves—Suzaku and Lelouch—sort of wrestling on the grass. The fact that Lelouch was winning was weird enough, but that was probably just because Suzaku wasn't putting up much of a fight. Or rather, he was, but his struggles were getting more and more feeble as Lelouch sort of manhandled him in the desired position, nibbling on his ear and caressing his sides.

The second Suzaku yelped when Lelouch's hand wandered into indecent territory, and Suzaku—the original one—decided it was time to intervene. "Err... Excuse me, but it might be a good idea to listen to him."

The other Lelouch lifted his head and turned to look at Suzaku. He tilted his head like a confused kitten. The somewhat surprised expression was soon replaced by a smug smile. "Look at that. We have more participants for our game."

Now that Suzaku could see him better, he realized this second Lelouch was actually dressed as the Julius Kingsley version of him, eyepatch included. It was actually a little unnerving, and he froze, not knowing how to react at the sight.

Meanwhile, his other self looked at him and the Ashford uniform Lelouch and his eyes widened. "What? You can't be serious... What kind of weird dream is this?"

"Oh?" The Julius Kingsley Lelouch asked. "Do you have erotic dreams about me often then? Interesting."

Suzaku could have actually answered that and told him that he had, indeed, had plenty of erotic dreams about Lelouch, in various positions and involving various amounts of bondage, depending on the time of his life. Sexual attraction had never been the issue between him and Lelouch.

But the Julius Kingsley Lelouch did not actually wait for a reply. Instead, he wriggled around in the fallen Suzaku's lap, drawing a gasp out of Suzaku's other self.

Suzaku himself couldn't help but feel a little jealous. The Lelouch next to him had an entirely different opinion.

"Hey!" he protested. "Don't sexually assault him like that!"

"It's only sexual assault if he doesn't want it," the second Lelouch said. "And he wants it bad... Don't you... Suzaku?"

The fallen Suzaku whimpered. It was not precisely a 'no'. If anything, Suzaku knew it was a 'God, yes."

It was also kind of... hot. Honestly, if this was the afterlife, Suzaku couldn't really bring himself to complain.

On the other hand, he couldn't imagine why his consciousness would manifest a memory of Julius Kingsley, when the incident with the emperor brainwashing Lelouch still weighed of him years after the fact.

No, something more was going on here, and Suzaku knew he needed to put his foot down in this situation, if only because he had to figure out what the hell was going on.

He stalked up to the duo and picked the eyepatched Lelouch off of his other self. Clearly, the fallen Suzaku wasn't about to do it, since he was too busy thinking he was having an erotic dream about himself—in a Zero suit—and two Lelouchs.

"That's quite enough," he said.

The Julius Kingsley Lelouch pouted prettily at Suzaku. "Come now. No need to be so rough. Unless... You're into that sort of thing, in which case, I could be persuaded. If you ask nicely."

Suzaku took a deep breath and tried very hard to not think of Lelouch tied up and at his mercy. Which was... actually much harder than expected, since he hadn't slept with anyone in over two years, Lelouch was just as gorgeous as he had always been, and there had always been regrets at missed opportunities between them.

No. Just, no. He had to figure out what had happened, damn it.

"Now is really not the time for that," he told the Julius Kingsley Lelouch.

"Well, if you want to be boring... But I'm willing to be patient." He threw their other selves a small smirk. "I wouldn't even mind sharing, as long as we can add my gorgeous pet to the mix."

The 'pet' in question spluttered, whereas the Ashford uniform Lelouch—who had at one point gone to the fallen Suzaku's aid—seemed torn between confusion, outrage, and something Suzaku was pretty sure he could identify as desire.

Suzaku suspected the Julius Kingsley Lelouch would've said something about it—he had a speculative expression on his face—but before the conversation could go any further, an angry cry reached their ears.

"Zero! Come back here!"

Well, fuck.

As Suzaku watched, a masked figure ran into the grove. He stumbled over a bush seconds after he came within view. He didn't have the time to recover, because a second man emerged from the foliage, his sword drawn.

It was, of course, Suzaku. He was dressed in the very familiar uniform of the Knight of Seven—the one Suzaku himself had worn during his service as a Rounds—and within seconds, he had immobilized the second figure against the ground.

Lelouch's mask fell as he struggled underneath Suzaku. Suzaku—err... the other, third Suzaku—snarled at him. "Lelouch," he hissed. "I've had enough of your tricks."

Suzaku decided that this was one exchange that he needed to interrupt far more than the eyepatched Lelouch's sexual harrassment of the fallen Suzaku. "I'm afraid that this particular one isn't his fault," he said. "Well, I don't think so, at least."

His other self looked up at him. Then, he looked at the younger Suzaku, who was still on the ground, and at the two other Lelouchs. The Julius Kingsley Lelouch arched a brow at him. "Well, hello there, handsome. Haven't seen you in a while."

"What the fuck," Knight of Seven Suzaku eloquently said. "This is some kind of twisted dream, isn't it?"

"A-ha!" Julius exclaimed. "There we go, with the dream again! Please, do elaborate. Any fantasies you'd like to share with the group? We're all open to suggestions."

Knight of Seven Suzaku stared at Julius Kingsley Lelouch. The other Lelouchs were conspicuously silent. Suzaku himself had no idea what to say to any of it.

He was almost grateful when the silence was broken by yet another voice. "Well, this is all very... quaint," a fourth Lelouch commented as he walked into the grove. He was wearing his emperor clothes, and by his side, another one Suzaku's selves stood by, scanning the area as if looking for enemies. "I don't suppose there's room for two more?"

Lelouch had gone through plenty of strange experiences in his life, including, but not limited to, facing the ghost of his mother in what amounted to a mechanism intended to destroy the world. He really had not thought his life/death could get any stranger.

Clearly, he'd been quite wrong. It appeared that somehow, four incarnations of both him and Suzaku had been created, in this strange, mysterious space, all of whom dated from a different time in their lives.

He was unsure how this could have occurred, but Geass could be used to manipulate both time and reality. In any case, the first thing he needed to do was to figure out who and what exactly these identities were.

So far, he could only make extrapolations based on their clothing. His other selves were dressed in his Ashford uniform, his Zero suit and his Julius Kingsley outfit, respectively. As for the Suzakus, one of them was wearing the same Zero suit Lelouch had entrusted him with. The others were all dressed in uniforms—every uniform of every knighthood Suzaku had ever had. Euphie's knight. The Knight of Seven. And the Knight of Zero, Lelouch's own knight, with whom he had met while on the way here.

But that only told him so much and it didn't answer all of his questions.

His knight was very confused and appeared to not remember anything past the battle from the Damocles. His first guess upon seeing Lelouch had been, "Did we lose on the Damocles?"

What did all the others remember?

Figuring this out would have probably been easier had all of the... Suzakus and Lelouchs been cooperative, but when had things in Lelouch's life ever been easy? If anything, he would've been surprised if their younger selves had agreed to work with him, just like that.

Suzaku's Knight of Seven personality was particularly crabby. It was a minor miracle he released the version of Lelouch he'd captured, and even after that, he glowered at them all like he wanted to reenact the Requiem on the spot.

Not a good thought to have, considering the circumstances.

"Look," Lelouch started, "I realize this is very confusing for most everyone here, but it does appear that, this in some way real. I'd like to propose that we set our own personal feelings aside and cooperate to find out what actually happened to trigger this phenomenon."

"I agree," the Suzaku dressed as Zero replied.

Everyone else was of the same opinion—except the Knight of Seven. The Lelouch dressed as Julius laughed at him. "You've been outvoted, Sir Kururugi. You're going to have to play along."

"Stop helping," Lelouch said to his younger self. "Let's focus on our priorities, yes?"

His other self agreed, although that didn't make Knight of Seven Suzaku less upset. "Fine then. Where do we start? What is this place? Is this related to Geass?"

"Geass?" the Lelouch dressed in the Ashford uniform repeated. "Is that the... contract that green-haired girl was talking about?"

Ah. Oh dear.

"I think perhaps... We should start with what the last thing everyone remembers."

It was a straightforward enough request, so despite all the confusion, all the Suzakus and Lelouchs complied.

For the purpose of convenience, they started with the Lelouchs.

He had already noticed that the manifestation of their Geass was different. The youngest Lelouch's power was in its incipience, so his explanation didn't come as much of a surprise. "I was in the Shinjuku ghettoes. I'd just come out of the tunnels with that green-haired girl when we were intercepted by a group of guards. She was shot trying to protect me. I thought I was going to die and then suddenly... I think she grabbed me. She offered me some kind of contract. That's it."

"I remember everything up to and including Euro-Britannia, as well as both our rather unpleasant meetings with our father," the Julius Kingsley Lelouch provided. Despite the somewhat vague phrasing, it was easy to understand what he meant. He only had memories until the moment his father had wiped his mind for the second time. His eye was covered by the eyepatch, but despite that, Lelouch knew that the Geass was already uncontrollable.

His third self understood the logic behind their second self's vagueness, as he simply said, "The Ragnarok Connection." It was unclear if he remembered killing their parents, but Lelouch decided it was not that relevant. As expected, this Lelouch had a Geass that had evolved to both eyes.

Lelouch himself didn't really want to explain his death, or the Zero Requiem, so instead, he turned toward the Suzakus. His avoidance of providing the explanation he himself had requested couldn't have gone unnoticed, but fortunately, his other selves let it go, and the only two Suzakus who didn't understand the reason went along with it despite their visible confusion.

"I was at the SAZ," the youngest Suzaku offered. "That green-haired woman from Shinjuku got out of Zero's knightmare and I went to help her. Then, nothing."

"I was in Tokyo, fighting Kallen. I was losing badly," Knight of Seven Suzaku said. "Her frame was much better than mine. I remember her coming at me with the claw, and then, it's a blank."

Right before the FLEIJA then.

Lelouch's own knight remembered the second battle with Kallen, on the Damocles, as he had first told him when they'd met here. That just left the final Suzaku, who shrugged. "Dying. An extremist in the Geass Order took me captive to bring you back."

An awkward silence fell. Apparently, there was only so much Suzaku was willing to avoid the elephant in the room, and he had decided to rip off the proverbial band aid.

"So, am I correct in guessing that both... err... all of us are dead then?" the Julius Kingsley Lelouch asked.

"That is the safe assumption to make, but it still doesn't explain this phenomenon." Lelouch pursed his lips. "In any case, our respective memories do help a bit. It appears that each of our selves was created at key points in our lives, during some kind of incident with Geass. And yes, for the benefit of our younger selves, that is related to the contract I made with the green-haired girl. It is a sort of superpower that can be used for various purposes, including manipulating time and reality. Mine is called Absolute Obedience and, through it, I can order people to do whatever I wish."

"Oh," his youngest self said thoughtlfully. "So... That's how I escaped Shinjuku."

Lelouch nodded. "That's the main reason, yes."

"Is that also what happened to me at Narita?" the young Suzaku asked. "This... Geass thing?"

He didn't sound very happy about it, but then, Lelouch couldn't blame him for it. At the time, he'd only known that C.C. had been sending 'the pilot' shock images. The idea that said pilot had been Suzaku did not sit well with him, but really, he'd caused Suzaku far more pain in far worse ways. "Sort of. That was C.C., the green-haired girl, using her own ability in an attempt to secure my escape."

"Because you're Zero," young Suzaku offered.

Lelouch didn't flinch away from the weight of the disappointment in Suzaku's green eyes. "Yes."

This was nothing compared to what would actually follow. Young Suzaku did not know that Euphie was dead, and young Lelouch did not know that he would be the one who had killed her.

Lelouch wondered what they were making of all this, how they were all assuming their deaths had come about. Young Suzaku would've probably tried to push in some other way, asked more, but Julius Kingsley Lelouch prevented that. "Now that we've gotten the obvious out of the way," he drawled, "I have a request. I don't know about you, but I find our multiple existence confusing. Before we go any further, I suggest we find separate names for ourselves. We can't all be Lelouchs and Suzakus. I'll start. I'll go by Julius."

Lelouch suspected the request was more or less a way to delay the unavoidable, give them all time to gather their bearings and make up some excuses, but that didn't mean he didn't appreciate it. He appreciated it a little less when the oldest Suzaku decided to be annoying about it. "I think the Suzakus are easy enough," he said. "I'm Zero. Then, there's the second oldest version of me, who is the equivalent of Lelouch's knight of One. He could be One. The Knight of Seven could be Seven and the younger version of me could be Eleven."

It was a practical suggestion. It was even logical and organized in a way that tended to appeal to Lelouch in most things.

Lelouch hated it with a passion.

"I'm not calling any version of you by a Britannian slur. Absolutely not. You're not a Number, you're a person. I don't care how much you hate yourself. You will not call yourself a Number in my presence."

Zero Suzaku closed his mouth with a snap. Meanwhile, Young Suzaku flushed, and Lelouch instantly knew what he was thinking. That an Eleven was exactly what he was.

Instantly, Lelouch felt horrible, for all of them. This was all his fault. He had been the one to turn the idealistic young man who'd still held some degree of hope in his heart to the soldier willing to sell his soul to any emperor who would help him achieve his goals. It was so hard to look at them, standing side by side, and know that he was the reason for the change.

True, Suzaku's older selves might have been more practical and more compatible with Lelouch's own ideas, but that didn't mean Lelouch didn't miss Suzaku's former smiles and the hope he had, against all odds, maintained, until Euphie's death.

"It's a moot point," Zero Lelouch pointed out, interfering in the exchange. "We have two Zeros here anyway. Both me and him."

Zero Suzaku nodded, acknowledging this was true. Lelouch considered possible options and finally suggested, "How about Zerozaku and Zerolouch? Since you're both obviously Zero, but different people."

"Wonderful idea," Julius piped up. "Zerozaku even has an alliteration. Catchy."

All the Suzakus stared at Julius. Finally, Zerozaku replied, "I'm good with that option."

"I suppose Zerolouch is fine with me," his Lelouch counterpart agreed. Clearly, they had decided that some things just had to be ignored if they were about to maintain at least a modicum of sanity.

Knight of Zero Suzaku was just as practical, as he had used this discussion to figure out his own name. "I'm going to go with Lancelot," he offered out of the blue.

"Hey!" Knight of Seven Suzaku spluttered. "I wanted to be Lancelot!"

"Technically, I'm the one who got the Lancelot first," Young Suzaku protested, somewhat more sedately.

"Too bad," Knight of Zero told them. "I picked it first. Also, I have seniority, and I outrank you both."

He smirked and threw Lelouch a look. Lelouch couldn't have denied his knight anything. "Lancelot it is then."

"Well, now we know who your favorite is," Julius drawled. "Not that I blame you. I like your taste in uniforms. I think that's the only time I've ever see over-the-knee boots look manly on anyone."

"Anything looks manly on Suzaku," Lelouch replied calmly. "Although I suppose that blue puppy suit might have been an exception. And the sailor girl uniform."

"You're the one to talk," Lancelot teased him. "I distinctly remember your very vocal protests during the cross-dressing festival. You looked very cute in a dress."

"I did, didn't I?" Julius hummed thoughtfully. "Is roleplay something you're into then, Lancelot? Do, tell me more."

Lelouch coughed. "Hush, you. Logical conversation now, kinky sex games later."

"Promises, promises," Julius said with a sigh, but subsided, regardless. It was becoming quickly apparent that keeping Julius's shameless nature in control was something Lelouch would have to repeatedly do. But then, that wasn't very surprising, now, was it?

Lelouch took advantage of Julius's compliance to make his own choice. "Moving on. I'd go by Emperor Lelouch, I suppose, but that's a bit of a mouthful."

"I like it," Zerozaku said. "It's who you are, after all." He had apparently gotten over Lelouch's earlier smack down and was even smiling a little.

"I agree, Your Majesty," Lelouch's own knight—now dubbed Lancelot—added.

Lelouch's face heated. He would probably always get a kick out of hearing Suzaku calling him that. More than once, he'd entertained thoughts of what Suzaku would sound like if he called Lelouch that in bed. He'd never pushed for it, not wanting to make things more complicated between them than they'd already been, but that didn't mean the desire hadn't been there.

Also, said desire was apparently making a comeback, now of all times. Damn it. He'd just chastised Julius for not focusing on the matter at hand, and he was allowing Suzaku to distract him.

Julius snickered, obviously completely aware of what Lelouch was thinking. Lelouch was very tempted to throw something at him.

"All right," he said, clearing his throat. "That only leaves our two younger selves, and the Honorable Knight of Seven."

"I can be... Lulu, I guess," young Lelouch offered tentatively.

He didn't seem incredibly keen on it, but then, he always had found the nickname embarassing. Still, considering the company young Lelouch was in, Lulu was sort of appropriate. Compared to everyone else, he was very innocent. He had yet to kill anyone. He had yet to be shattered and repeatedly put himself back together only because of the desire to finish his work.

Physically, they weren't too different, but mentally, they were entirely different people.

Lelouch acknowledged the new name with a nod. "Appropriate."

"I'll go with Sir Kururugi then," Knight of Seven Suzaku said, curling his lip slightly. "Kururugi, for short." He clearly didn't know what to think of all this and still resented Lelouch for the episode with Euphie. Lelouch wondered why he was going along with it anyway, why, despite his clear self-hatred, he was still trying to cooperate, in some way. Maybe it was because even at their worst, the two of them had always trusted each other.

Lelouch shot him a small smile. He still remembered this man dragging him in front of his father and holding him down while Charles wiped his mind, but he'd long ago dealt with any anger he might have felt over the incident. He'd take the olive branch in whatever shape it was offered. "Wonderful, Sir Kururugi. Which leaves us with your youngest self."

"I don't know," Suzaku replied in a daze, obviously still much too overwhelmed to come up with something. "I'm just... Uh... I don't know."

Julius made a cooing sound and wrapped his arm around his neck. "Aww. He's so cute. I vote we call him Suzu."

Lelouch wanted to weep. "He's not a puppy, Julius. He needs to pick his own name."

"Suzu is fine," Young Suzaku replied quickly. "It goes with my Lelouch's option too."

Lulu's face flamed. He seemed to be torn between embarrassment and the desire to separate Julius from Suzu. The latter won out, and he somehow managed to wriggle his way between the two.

Julius seemed to indulge him, but didn't quite move away either, so instead the trio ended up in a kind of strange curled up embrace. Lelouch wondered if Julius truly was perverted enough to feel lust for himself. What was he thinking? Of course he was.

"All right, now that we have that settled... We need to figure out what actually happened and where we go from here. Zerozaku, any thoughts? Can you tell us more about what exactly happened before we woke up here?"

Their younger selves had other ideas.

"Actually..." Lulu said. "Would you maybe fill us in on everything, because we're still a little confused here? How exactly did I become an emperor again?"

"And how did I go from becoming Euphie's knight to... Zero?" Suzu asked. "And how in the world did you die?"

All the other Lelouchs and Suzakus flinched.

This was not going to be easy.