Yeah. I'm sorry about this one. All the angst, none of the payoff.

You see me in hindsight
Tangled up with you all night
Burn it down
Some day when you leave me
I bet these memories follow you around

-Taylor Swift (Wildest Dreams)

She looked up, sun shining on her face. Sometimes it was nice to be out in nature, in the quiet, with no one bothering her. She had no idea where her phone or badge or gun were and she found she didn't care. She continued to walk around the lake, taking in the scenery. What struck her were the colors. They were brighter than she was used to. Vibrant. Almost unreal. She saw the figure sitting on the bench. She was drawn there, even though she thought she wanted to be alone. To be left alone. To have no one bother her. No one except that figure sitting there. She made her way to him, sitting down right next to him. He didn't even look at her. He just reached over and grabbed her hand, lacing their fingers together.

"These are the colors I was talking about. Aren't they amazing?"

"Yes" she sighed out, looking down at their joined hands. She could feel the heat coming off of him, through her hand and into her body.

"You are the reason I'm seeing these. Always remember that."

"It gets harder every day to remember why." She squeezed his hand.

"I know. But you have to. I need to know that you are."

"I'm trying."

He finally looked over at her, his green eyes shining brighter than she had ever seen them shine before.

"That's all I can ask, Liv." He squeezed her hand one last time and pushed himself off the bench. The words she so desperately wanted to say to him were literally stuck in her throat. She started to panic as he slowly started to recede. She tried and tried to push them out. He looked over his shoulder at her, a sad smile on face. The tears rolled down her face, fighting with the words that refused to come out of her mouth. He was just a shadow now, the colors and light fading around him. She bolted off the bench, running around it, the words finally breaking loose.

"I LOVE…"

She shot up in bed. "YOU" she yelled out. She quickly looked around, rubbing her face. But all that was there was her darkened bedroom. The only light was the light she could see down the hallway from the one she always left on over the sink. She looked at the clock. 5:15 AM. She threw herself backwards on the bed, arms over her head.

"Rafa" she whispered out.

He stared at the house, out here in the peace and quiet. The huge wrap around porch, the swing and the rocking chairs. It felt like home. The front door opened and she walked out, looking happy and breezy in her dress, no shoes, hair slightly windblown. He jogged up the few steps, stopping in front of her. Her brown eyes full of light and love, looking right at him. She was his for the taking if he were brave enough.

"Isn't this place great?" she asked him. He looked around where they stood. "When I was little and mom was out of control, it was this place I would dream of getting to one day. The peace and quiet. The room to move around and just be. Some place to grow happy." He felt her rest her hands on his shoulders. The heat from her hands almost burning through his shirt and on to his skin.

"This is the place." He wanted to ask why, but the words wouldn't come. "This is the place I imagine when I think about you and I, squabbling when we are 85. Side by side. Together." He felt her sigh deep in his bones and felt a chill when she removed her hands from his shoulders. She smiled sadly at him, turning on her heel and walking back through the door.

He was frozen in his spot. He finally forced his foot to move and he grabbed the door, determined to follow her. To tell her that he wanted to be right here with her, squabbling. But the door wouldn't budge. He pulled and pulled and pulled but it refused to open. He could see her inside, wiping tears off her face, sadly moving around. He banged on the door, but there was no noise.

He leaned against it, trying to yell her name. But she felt so far away.

"Let me in!" he was finally able to get out. "Please let me come back…"

He shot up in bed, wildly looking around the foreign bedroom he found himself in. "LIV!" he yelled to no one but himself. He glanced over at the clock. 5:15 AM. Another night. Another night of her, haunting his dreams. He pushed himself out of bed, heading to the bathroom to get himself ready for a long run. He needed to clear his head. And small part of him hoped for another dream about her tonight. It helped him feel close to her when they were so far apart.