A/N: Finally, a new chapter! I really hope y'all enjoy it and please review.

*Anything in Italics is a flashback.

Finger On The Trigger

Part II

Chapter 3

Beth-

Daryl and I had managed to secure the mortuary but we knew it wouldn't hold up to much though it would be safe for a day or two. That was long enough for us to rest and maybe get some more supplies.

But now, I was sittin' behind the piano, tryin' to remember some of my favorite songs but nothin' came to mind. I sat up straight when I felt Daryl's eyes on me. He was watchin' me from the doorway.

"What?" I asked.

He shrugged and moved towards the open casket. "What happened to ya?" He asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Ya ain't tha same."

I shrugged and turned back to the piano. "Haven't we already had this conversation?"

"Not like this. This change ain't good. Ya ain't tha same."

"Nobody's the same, Daryl. So what if I've changed? I won't be your problem forever. My time will come soon."

"See? That right there is what I'm talkin' 'bout. Ya ain't tha same."

"It doesn't matter anymore. The only thing that's changed is that I see you were right. We lost everyone. There's...there's no chance in hell anyone is alive. Rick...Maggie...my kids, they're all gone. I see that now."

Daryl didn't say much to me after that. For the rest of the night, he just kind of stared at me at first but that was it.

On our second night in the mortuary we were sittin' in the kitchen eating when we heard some noises outside.

Daryl got up to check out the perimeter and within seconds he was screamin' at me to get my shit and climb out of the window. I did as he said and ran.

I stopped to wait for him when I got to the road. I knew it wouldn't be long before he was there, too.

I fought back, using everythin' Rick and Daryl had taught me but it wasn't enough. They still took me.

I kicked and tried to scream but after I calmed down, I tried to come up with a plan. That's when I noticed the four people in the car were wearing police uniforms. In this moment I was thankful I hadn't yet lost too much of the little weight I had gained while pregnant.

"Please stop," I pleaded.

"Sorry but we can't stop," one of them said.

"Please? You have to stop. I'm pregnant and I really need to pee!"

One of the officers looked at me with a frown, his eyes traveling from my face down to my breasts and then my stomach before returning to my face.

"Stop the car," he muttered to the driver.

"What? Why? She can wait to piss."

"No, she can't. Pregnant women need to pee whenever they can," the officer in the backseat with me said.

"Fine. We'll stop," the driver said while slowing down and coming to a stop.

One of the officers in the backseat with me pulled me out of the car by my arm and led me over to woods.

"I'm goin' to uncuff you but don't try anything stupid or I'll shoot you," he said.

I nodded and took a few steps into the woods with him right behind me.

"Can you please wait?" I asked, "I can't pee if I'm bein' watched."

He huffed but took a few steps back and faced the road.

I chose a tree to stand behind for a few seconds before takin' the knife I had hidden in my boot out and slowly movin' away.

Daryl had taught me how to be silent but quick when movin' away from a herd and o figured this was no different. These men could kill me just the same as a herd of walkers could.

The further I ran, the more shouting I heard. They were stupid for doin' that but I wasn't concerned with them, I had to look out for myself and get away.

The darkness worked in my favor. Even with their flashlights I would catch glimpses of, they weren't bright enough to pick up my tracks but I wasn't a fool. I knew I wasn't completely out of the woods yet. For all I knew they could have been surrounding me and waitin' for me to let my guard down.

By mornin' I was exhausted, thirsty and hungry but I kept movin'.

It was close to dark before I came upon a structure that could've once been a home but was now deserted and looked as if it would fall down if the wind picked up the slightest bit.

I eased up the steps as carefully as I could and knocked on the door and waited. When I didn't hear any movement or moans, I raised my knife and slowly turned the doorknob. I was pleasantly surprised to see that the inside was in better shape than the exterior.

The couch looked like the most comfortable thing I'd ever laid eyes on but I didn't have time to stay.

I quickly started goin' through the house to find anythin' I could use.

After goin' through the livin' room and the two bedrooms and the bathroom, I had managed to find a few supplies. A child's backpack, some ibuprofen, matches, candles, two pairs of socks and a sweater. I didn't find much in the kitchen except a can of beans, a box of macaroni, two empty Gatorade bottles and a knife.

I put what little supplies I had into the backpack and left.

I was on the road, on my own, for close to three weeks. I tried to keep count of the days but after about a week, I gave up.

I didn't stop for more than a few minutes at a time whenever I couldn't find somewhere to sleep.

As the darkness surrounded me and the wind became colder, I began to hear things. I prayed I wasn't goin' crazy but the more I walked, the more voices I heard.

I know I must have been hallucinating when I heard a baby cry. That broke me. For the first time in weeks, I slowed down and allowed myself to cry.

I heard the cries again but this time they were mixed with the moans and shuffling of walkers. I quickly stood up from where I was kneeling and looked around. There was a group of about ten, maybe more, walkers headed towards me.

I ran. I didn't know where I was goin' or what I was goin' to do but I did the only thing I could.

When I could no longer hear the moans of the walkers, I slowed down just enough I wasn't makin' so much noise and drawing attention to myself. I must have been walkin' for at least another hour when I heard a baby cry again but this time I heard someone scream and a gunshot.

Rick and Daryl would've killed me for runnin' towards the sounds but I didn't care.

When I reached the edge of the woods, I stopped dead in my tracks. I felt tears start runnin' down my cheeks at the sight of my family. I was so happy and I wanted to just rush to them. Hug them all and hold my kids but I stopped again when I took a step forward.

A man had Carl on ground and was on top of him, Daryl and Merle were both on the ground, there was a gun pointed at Michonne and one pointed at Rick. I could hear a baby cryin', I could tell it was Annie but I couldn't see her.

I couldn't make out what was bein' said from where I was but I watched as Rick threw his head back, knockin' the man behind him off balance. They fought until the man grabbed Rick and had his arms pinned by his sides. I was about to run to them but I watched in horror as Rick bit into the mans neck then he spit out a chunk of flesh and blood when he pulled away. I turned away and tried to catch my breath when Rick stuck his knife in the gut of the man who was holdin' Carl down.

Choking back more tears, I turned around and chanced one more look at my family before continuing to walk on in the opposite direction.

Before, right after the prison, I had to push all thoughts of my babies and all hope of finding them aside but they were never off my mind. I missed them more than anyone else, more than Rick, Maggie, Daddy, Mama, Shawn and everyone from our prison family. I missed Carl too but I couldn't help but miss Judy, Shawn and Annie more. They were babies, helpless and unable to defend themselves and survive on their own.

But now, I had to be the worst mother for walkin' away from my family back there but what Rick did...it scared me.

After a day and a half of walkin', I came across some railroad tracks so I followed them. I didn't walk on the tracks unless I had to though, I mostly stayed just inside the tree line.

Somewhere down the tracks I came across a walker stuck in-between the ties. I walked around him, not bothering to put him down.

It was probably a little stupid of me but I decided to stop a little ways away from there. It was still daylight but I really needed to stop for a few minutes.

I was just putting my Gatorade bottle back into my backpack when I heard screamin' from close by. This was gettin' old but it was the reality of things now, just the way the world is now.

I put the backpack on and went back to the tracks to continue on my way.

The screams continued.

"Carol!"

I stopped when I heard the name and started runnin' back towards the screams.

Two kids were runnin' from several walkers, I followed them.

I wasn't sure what or who I'd find by followin' them so I stayed back a ways and waited. I looked away when one of the girls went down at the fence. She was still kickin' and screamin' but I couldn't watch. I closed my eyes at the sound of a gunshot, then more followed. Once they had stopped, I waited a few minutes before lookin' back towards the girls.

"Carol!" I shouted and took off runnin' towards them. "Carol!"

She stopped and turned around. "Beth?"

"Oh my God, Beth!" She ran over to me and hugged me with tears in her eyes. "Oh sweetie," she pulled away and took my hand, "let's get you cleaned up."

When we reached the house, I noticed the two girls were Lizzie and Mika. They both hugged me.

"Oh my God," Mika jumped up and down, "oh my God! Beth, we have Judith!"

"What?" I turned my head to look at Carol.

She nodded and smiled, "She's inside."

I went inside first and found Tyreese holdin' Judy. He smiled too and handed her to me.

"There ya go, baby girl. Your mama's here now," he said.

I held Judith to me and cried and kissed her head and face.

Later that night, I was walkin' around the livin' room bouncing Judy on my hip, Carol and Lizzie sat at the table talkin' and cracking pecans, Mika was in the floor playin' with a doll, and Tyreese was asleep in a chair.

Everythin' seemed normal and the way it should be.

The next mornin', Carol and Tyreese went huntin' while I went to the well to get some water for a bath.

"Beth!" Carol shouted, "Beth, come here!"

I left the buckets and ran to Carol.

She and Tyreese were standin' there starin' at Lizzie. I gasped when I saw the knife in her hand and Mika on the ground.

"You and Tyreese should take Judith back. It's not safe for her," Carol told Lizzie.

"But Judith can change, too. I was just about..."

"Don't you dare touch my daughter!" I shouted at her and raised the gun Carol had given me.

"Beth," Tyreese said and grabbed my arm, "Don't. "

Carol looked at me, waiting for me to lower the gun. When I did, she turned back to Lizzie, "She can't even walk yet."

Carol talked calmly to Lizzie, too calm. I hated that I wanted to kill her after she said she wanted to turn Judy, too.

She's just a child and I wanted to kill her!

Tyreese picked Judith up and led Lizzie away. Carol started cryin' when they were out of sight.

"Carol, she wants to kill my daughter."

"She's messed up, Beth," she sighed, "Just help me bury Mika. Please?"

I held Judy in the livin' room while Carol and Tyreese talked in the kitchen. I was standin' close to the doorway and only half listening and tryin' to decide what to do.

"I could leave with her," Carol said.

"What?"

"We can't sleep with her and Judith under the same roof."

"You wouldn't make it," Tyreese told her, "not on your own."

"She can't be around other people."

"Maybe we could try to help her. Talk her back somehow," Tyreese reasoned.

"It's just how she is. It was already there. I didn't see it."

"How could you?" Tyreese asked.

"I should have seen it," Carol replied.

"So maybe we go. Me, Beth and Judith," Tyreese said.

"You won't make it either," Carol said. "She can't be around other people."

Carol got up and went to the room Lizzie was in then they went outside.

I walked over to the window and stood next to Tyreese.

"What is she doin'?" I asked.

"What she feels she has to," he said.

I took a deep breath and went back to the livin' room.

If Carol could do what she felt she had to, then so could I.

I gathered my backpack, Judith and her things and went out the front door.

We hadn't gone too far from the house when I heard a gunshot.

That's what Carol felt she had to do and leavin' with Judy was what I felt I had to do. Even if we would be on our own.

Daryl-

"You should save it to drink," Rick said when I started pourin' some water on a rag.

"You cain't see yerself, he can." I handed him a rag an' sat down next to him.

"I didn't know what they were," I said after I sat down.

"How'd you wind up with them?"

"I's with Beth. We got out together. I was with 'er fer a while."

"Is she dead?"

"She's jus' gone." When I looked at 'im I knew he wanted ta hit me. He looked away though. Like he didn't believe me, like he thought she really was dead. So I continued while he scrubbed at his wedding ring. "After that's when they found me. I mean, I knew they were bad but...they had a code. It was simple. Stupid. But it was somethin', it was enough."

"And you were alone," he said but it sounded more like a question.

"Said they were lookin' for some guy an' last night they said they spotted him. I was hangin' back. I was gonna leave but I stayed. That's when I saw it was y'all. Right when you saw me. I didn't know what they could do."

"It's not on you, Daryl," Rick said immediately. "Hey, that's not on you. You bein' back with us here, now, that's everythin'. You're my brother."

We were both quiet fer a minute. I couldn't wrap my head 'round him sayin' that. 'Specially since I jus' told him I couldn't protect Beth, his wife.

"Hey, what you did last night, anybody woulda done that," I said.

"No. Not that," he replied.

"Somethin' happened. That ain't you."

"Daryl, you saw what I did to Tyreese. It ain't all of it but that's me. That's why I'm here now. That's why Carl is. I want to keep him and the babies safe. That's all that matters."

A/N: so obviously I incorporated a few episodes into this chapter but from here the story will only have a few things from the show. This is an AU fic, so be prepared. ;)

Again, please review.