The next morning started really slow. We had all been up really late the night before. Ranger had slept okay, but it had been really, really late when I had finally drifted off to sleep. My first hint of awareness wasn't the raging nausea that usually accompanied my morning these days, but instead the feel of Ranger's lips on the back of my neck and the smell of his freshly showered body as he curled around me.

"Are you going to sleep all day," he whispered as he scattered kisses over my neck and shoulders.

"Hmmm," I sighed and snuggled back into him. "You smell good."

"So do you," he murmured.

I smiled, "I haven't had a shower."

"So," he said and nibbled at the joint of my neck and shoulder.

I moaned, "You're cheating."

"I'm just waking you up," he chuckled.

"Will you wake me up like this every day from now on," I pleaded.

"I can do that," he agreed.

I could feel his smile against my neck. "What's on the agenda?"

"I have a doctor's appointment, then I have a therapist appointment, then we'll have lunch and then we have our first couple's therapy session."

"I thought you had to have a MRI before your doctor's appointment," I asked.

"Dr. Funny Bone called and asked me a bunch of questions. He decided that I was doing okay so I didn't have to have the MRI. He's probably going to take the stitches out today. Normally I'd just have Bobby do it, but he says under the circumstances he'd feel better if I came by."

"Okay," I sighed. "So, I need to get into the shower?"

"You do," he buried his face in my neck.

"I don't want to," I whined.

He grinned and kissed my neck. "What do you want to do?"

"What I'm doing right now," I sighed.

"If I promise you more of this later, will you get in the shower?"

"You drive a hard bargain Ricardo Manoso," I sighed and pulled away from him. "Fine, I'm getting in the shower."

"Thank you," he smiled.

"You're welcome," I smiled back.

Dr. Funny Bone Riley was pleased with Ranger's progress and told him that he'd be okay to return to light duty. Ranger was ecstatic. He hated feeling like he wasn't contributing. He hated being idle. I liked him being idle. I liked having him at home where I could keep an eye on him.

Mitch and I dropped Ranger off for his therapy session and found a parking place and just sat.

"Mitch," I began hesitantly.

"Uh-oh," he turned in the seat and smiled at me.

"Uh-oh," I blinked.

"The way you said that made me think this is going to be a tough conversation."

"Just for me," I sighed. "How long have you known that you were an unmentionable?"

"Pretty much as long as I can remember," he shrugged and let his eyes drift around. It looked, to an observer, as though he was just thinking and not really seeing what was there, but Mitch was watching. He was ever watchful.

"Oh," I bit my lip.

"For guys it's pretty much like that," he admitted. "My girl cousins, their abilities usually didn't show until they were into puberty. There's something about puberty that causes it in some girls. I have this one cousin Marianna; she can move things with her mind. You know, she's telekinetic. Anyway, she was moving things from the crib," he chuckled. "Aunt Deidre had to make sure all the bottles were taken from the room and washed immediately to keep her from getting bad milk. She was a handful from the beginning." He shook his head with a smile. "Of course, these days she's like Diesel. She's a hunter. She's a bad ass. She has abilities I can't even imagine."

"Oh," I bit my lip.

"Why are you asking Steph? I know there's a reason."

"I just wonder why I… I mean, how do I know if what I have been able to do in the past is real or just a fluke?"

"You can be tested," he said seriously. "You should be tested. Diesel can test you."

"What does that test involve," I frowned at him.

He laughed. "Don't worry; it's not like a doctor's visit. He puts you into a room and reads you."

"How do we know he hasn't done it already?"

"We don't," he shrugged. "He wouldn't necessarily tell you that you are."

"Then what's the point," I sighed.

"You need to know," he frowned.

"I need to know," I said softly. "I need to know if I should trust these tingles more than I do. I need to know if I should act on them sooner. I need to know. I need to know so I can prevent more deaths."

He nodded. "I'll give him a call."

"Thanks," I sighed.

For the remainder of our wait we talked about buying furniture for Rangeman and the facilities. I was pretty excited about it. Gaby knew we were coming and had loaded up. We had trucks standing by to do the pickup. He would have people pulling things down as fast as we selected them. I had a list. I thought we might clean him out. He knew and he was pleased. He told me that he thought he might be able to retire after completing our order. He just might.

When Ranger came out of the building with Lester, he looked really tired. He had seemed okay that morning, but now he looked like he'd been beat up. Maybe therapy was really hard on him. Maybe Dr. Addison did make him cry. Maybe I shouldn't tease him.

He got into the backseat beside me and fastened his seatbelt with a small sigh.

I reached over and took his hand and smiled. He was doing this for both of us. I wanted him to know I appreciated it. I do.

He smiled slightly and leaned over to kiss me. He rested his forehead against mine for a moment then took a deep breath. "I think we need food. Stephanie…your call for lunch today," he smiled.

"Okay," I bit my lip, "let's go to Rosie's Diner. We haven't been there in forever."

His lip twitched, "okay."

"Okay," I smiled.

Three of us ordered cheeseburgers, fries and shakes and Ranger ordered a salad with balsamic vinegar dressing. He's such a wild cat when it comes to food. Yea…I smirked.

"You know," I said softly to Ranger while Mitch and Lester studied the menu for dessert, "if you want to delay this afternoon's session…we can."

He took a deep breath, "no, let's do it. We need to do it."

"Are you sure," I bit my lip.

"I'm sure," he smiled. "Don't worry so much."

"It's what I do."

"I know," he laughed softly.

The guys ordered dessert and Ranger grinned at Mitch, "do you know why Stephanie picked this place?"

"She loves cheeseburgers," he raised a brow.

"That too," he laughed. "This is where we met. As a matter of fact, we were in this booth. I was where I am and she was where you are."

"What did you think," Mitch grinned.

"She had spunk," Ranger shrugged. "If I scared her, she didn't show it outwardly. She was determined. She was beautiful."

I laughed, "He scared me."

"He scares a lot of people," Lester grinned.

"He was huge and wearing black and he had this hair slicked back in a ponytail with earrings. He was the only person I knew that was brave enough to wear earrings in both ears. Where I grew up, that was like an open declaration you were gay," I shrugged. "I figured out pretty quick that he wasn't gay."

"Good to know," Ranger nodded.

"Well," I giggled. "It was certainly wishful thinking on my part."

"You were single then," Mitch asked.

"Yea, Morelli was actually my first FTA. He was wanted for murder. It was a hundred thousand dollar bond and my take was going to be ten percent. I needed that money. I mean badly."

"You got your man," he asked.

"Yea," I nodded with a slight smile, "with a little help from my friends."

"In more ways than one," Lester teased. "Ouch…who kicked me?"

"You're lucky that's all I did," Ranger growled.

"Dude, he's her past. You're her present and her future…right?"

"Right," he glared.

"I get it, leave Morelli out of it," he said rubbing his shin.

We spent the rest of lunch talking about my FTA's and my propensity for destroying cars, getting covered in garbage and other slime, and getting my ass in hot water. There was a lot of laughter.

"I can't believe you're the same girl," Mitch laughed. "You're so different now."

"I've only been like this less than a year," I admitted. "But I'm much better now than I was. My focus is different now. It seems like I finally get my act together and I'm moving onto a different phase of life," I grinned. "Oh well, ain't it always the way."

"Always," he nodded.

After lunch we drove back to Dr. Addison's building and Mitch found a parking space up front easily. "Okay you two," he said pulling up in front of the building, "there will be no hitting below the belt. You will fight fair. You will not linger over things that should be forgotten. You will remember the goal."

"Yes sir," I grinned and slid out of the truck.

"You're pushing it Ghost," Ranger said stepping onto the sidewalk.

"You should be glad I'm encouraging instead of discouraging," he grinned as he got out of the truck to let Lester take the wheel.

"Keep them in line Mitch," Lester grinned.

"Will do," he nodded and followed us into the building.

The receptionist smiled at us the moment we walked in. "Let me tell him that you're here. He's really looking forward to today's session."

"Oh boy," I swallowed.

Dr. Addison appeared at his office door a few minute later. "Good. Good. Come on in."

I got to my feet and walked into the office with Ranger's hand on the small of my back.

"I'm glad you're both here. I have to tell you, I've been looking forward to this ever since Stephanie started therapy with me."

I groaned.

"Oh come now Stephanie," he laughed. "You had to know that as much as I've heard from you about your husband that I'd have some things to say."

I nodded.

"Okay, get comfortable and let's get started. Why don't we start with the fundamentals of why we're here," he said calmly. "Who wants to go first?"

I sighed, "The fundamentals of why we're here? You mean the reasons?"

"Right," he nodded.

"Well, I…we want the marriage to work and we both realize that we have work to do."

He nodded, "you sound like a textbook."

I sighed.

"What about you," he nodded at Ranger.

"I need to be able to tell Stephanie how I feel about her. I think I'm fairly good at showing it now most of the time, but I can't tell her. I think we need to be more open with each other. We seem to know only the surface of each other."

"That's good," he nodded. "Can you give me an example of that?"

"Well, for instance, I didn't know that she color coded her closet until we were living together in the house. She didn't do that in the penthouse. She didn't do that in her apartment. Her closet and drawers are…well, they're not labeled, but everything is together…you know the blues and the reds. She's a neat freak. I didn't know that about her before."

"I haven't always been that way," I admitted. "When I feel like my life is out of control I do what I can to find control. That's why I keep the closet and drawers like that. By being organized it helps me feel less out of control."

"But your life was out of control before," he blinked at me. "Your life was a mess and so was your apartment."

"True," I swallowed. "I didn't… The stuff that made my life out of control before wasn't anything that was truly important to me. When our…when I realized I was in love with you and I felt out of control in that aspect of my life, that's when I really changed."

"So you need control of that part of your life," Dr. Addison said.

"I don't know that I need to be in complete control," I said with a slight frown. "It's life. How can anyone ever be in complete control? I just want more control than I feel like I have sometimes. It's a little better now, but once you're in that habit, it's hard to put it aside and change back."

He nodded. "Okay Stephanie, what have you learned about Ranger?"

"Oh my God," I groaned, "it will take a couple of days to list all the things I've learned about him. He has tools."

Dr. Addison frowned, "and that is something you didn't know?"

"I didn't know," I said wide-eyed. "He has a router and some saws and a Dremel and all manner of tools. I've never even seen him hang a picture on the wall. But he has all these tools. I don't even know if he's ever used them. He has a router. Has he made a piece of furniture or something? I don't know."

"Why does this bother you," he asked.

"Because we're married," I said in frustration. "When you marry someone, aren't you supposed to know them? With everything I've learned about him in the last few months, I'm not sure I know very much about him at all. What if…what if we end up not being compatible because we have nothing in common other than hunting bad guys? I'm about to be a mother. I can't be traipsing all over the place looking to exterminate evil doers when I have a child at home. What if we don't have anything else to talk about," I swallowed as the last words came out of my mouth in a whisper. I reached up to dash the tears off my cheeks. "I'm scared of that."

"Is that all you're afraid of," he asked.

"Isn't that enough," I sighed. "But no…that's not all."

"What else," he asked.

"I didn't know anything about his family until we were married. For all I knew he could have been hatched. I don't know about his childhood. I didn't know he read He's Not That Into You, and judging from the tattered cover, he's read it a few times." I took a deep breath, "everyone in my family calls him Ricardo. I know that's his name. I call him Ranger. I call my husband, the father of my child by his street name, and everyone else in my family calls him Ricardo…his family too. What does that say about us? And…and," I bit my trembling lip as the tears slid down my face, "he won't tell me that he loves me."

"But…"

"Won't or can't," I said shakily, "in either case, it doesn't feel real because he can't or won't."

The men gave me a few minutes to get myself together before carrying on.

"Okay, that's Stephanie's side. Mr. Manoso, how do you feel about that?"

"That she's right," he said softly. "I know that we don't know each other very well. That's the reason I brought everything I had to her house when I moved in. I wanted her to know who I was. I figured she'd be surprised by some of the things she found. I wanted her to be surprised. I wanted her to see that I wasn't this one dimensional character that I seemed to be. I'm real. I have layers. I wanted her to know that I wasn't just the guy who kept her safe and gave her orgasms," he groaned. "It's hard for me to talk about me. It's hard for me to feel like it's important to anyone else who I am. But I'm trying."

"I know," I whispered.

"I…also know that we haven't even talked about one of the biggest things out there keeping us from being all we can be to each other," he sighed. "I married her. She was drunk and I was sober. I knew what I was doing. She didn't or if she did, she wasn't as aware that it was real. I tricked her," he shrugged and swallowed. "I took what I wanted from her and thought we could fix it later. I knew she loved me. She told me that she loved me. I…I went by the rule that it was easier to get forgiveness than permission considering my problems."

"It wasn't fair," I sighed.

"I know," he admitted. "I didn't realize how much damage I could do, that I have done. I wasn't your partner. I was acting like I was the boss and I made all the decisions. I took your feelings out of the equation and that was wrong. I know that. I understand that. I just want to fix it."

I bit my lip.

"You two haven't talked about any of this before today?"

"We were going to," Ranger said with a sigh. "Then someone tried to kill us and very nearly succeeded. We got off track."

"And we found out that I was pregnant," I said softly. "Focus shifted. But we know it's important or we wouldn't be here."

"Okay," he leaned forward with his fingers linked, "you do have some problems. Some of your problems are doozies too," he said seriously. "I won't lie to you. Not only that, some of the things that are your problems that seem so insignificant, aren't. And some of the things that seem huge aren't so important." He sighed. "You're not having sex?"

"No," I shook my head. "I need the words."

"Do you feel like you're withholding part of yourself from him to get what you want?"

"That may be how it appears," I said tearfully, "but I can't give myself to him again and not know that he feels what I feel. I can't do it."

He nodded, "okay, sex is out. What you're feeling is reasonable." He turned to Ranger, "do you understand that?"

He nodded.

"Okay, so you don't make love. You need to snuggle, kiss, whisper and be like lovers. You need the intimacy. If sex is out, then you need to find another intimacy. Do you understand?"

"Yes," we said together and nodded.

"But if you get to the point where sex isn't out, that's okay too. You need the intimacy, all right?"

"Okay," I said softly.

"Also, Stephanie…why do you call him Ranger," he asked.

"That's the name he was introduced to me with. He's always been Ranger."

"I call him Ricardo."

I groaned, "See…"

"You could choose to call him something other than Ranger," he said seriously. "You've made a choice to continue to call him Ranger when you know those who are his family call him something else. Why do you do it?"

"I don't know," I whispered.

"That's your assignment for our next session. Figure out something else to call him or decide that you're both okay with you continuing to call him Ranger. If you choose to call him something else, you need to call him something that your average street thug doesn't call him."

I nodded.

"And Ricardo, you need start sharing part of yourself with your wife. Start telling her about your childhood and not just leaving things around to give her hints. You need to communicate. Do you know much about Stephanie's childhood?"

"Yes," he nodded.

"Then don't you think it's fair that you share yours," he asked.

"Yes," he said quietly.

"I also expect you to talk for one half hour every day about things you like to do that have nothing to do with your job or your child or your home. I want you to talk about books and movies and music and vacation destinations and all sorts of things that are just about you. When I see you back here in one week, we'll discuss what you've learned. If you can…talk about your wedding, can you try to do that?"

I nodded and saw Ranger's head bob with mine.

"You were right to be worried. You obviously care about each other because each of you has been honest in saying what you need and what you're afraid of. You're willing to do the work. You both know that marriage is more than diamond rings and sex. I believe you're committed. So…we'll work on this. This is salvageable."

I felt the breath I'd been holding slip past my lips.

He smiled at me, "you were afraid I'd say it was hopeless?"

"I was," I whispered.

"What would you have done if I said that?"

"Found another therapist," I said with my head held high.

He laughed, "And that's why it's not hopeless. I'll see you a week from today at this same time. Is that good?"

"That's good," Ranger nodded.

"Keep the faith," he said quietly when he opened the door. "You're in the right place."

I nodded and Ranger shook his hand.

The ride back to the house was pretty quiet. Neither of the guys said anything to either of us. I must have looked pretty miserable. I know Ranger looked a little worse for wear.

When we got home I went straight to the kitchen. I'd make dinner and I'd think about things there in my new thinking position. I'd think about how to fulfill my homework requirements. I'd think about how to save my marriage. I would definitely think about the obvious pain on my husbands face as he talked. He was hurting. I wasn't the only one.

As I worked I realized how we'd both been covering up what was really going on inside of our hearts. I was terrified and didn't tell him or show him, he sure wasn't giving me any clue that he was as concerned as I was. I had to admit to myself that he was showing me that he loved me…all the time. Maybe he'd been showing me for four years. For four years he'd protected me from harm. He'd comforted me. He'd helped me to become good at what I did. He advised me in everything from real estate to proper gun care. I had been so blind.

I sank down on the stool at the kitchen island and swallowed. All those kisses in the alleys, all the times he'd been able to find me and protect me, he'd loved me. The way he found me at Stiva's and the look on his face when he'd pulled me out of the box…it showed that he loved me. What the hell was wrong with me? Did I need the words when he showed me in every other way imaginable?

I got up off the stool and walked out of the kitchen. Mitch and Lester were sitting on the couch watching television. Mitch glanced at me and nodded toward the stairs.

I almost ran up the stairs, so much so that I was breathless when I opened the bedroom door. He was lying on the bed face up with his hands behind his head staring at the ceiling.

"Stitches out," I whispered.

He glanced over at me and nodded.

I ran to him and lay down on top of him and buried my face in his neck and cried.

"Babe…er…Stephanie," he whispered as his arms came around me.

"I love you," I whispered from his neck. "And it's okay if you can't say it. I know you love me. I know you always have loved me." I raised my head and met his frown, "I can't believe I was so blind."

"Shhh," he whispered and pushed the curls back from my face. "It's okay."

"I don't need them that bad. If it hurts you to fix it or to explore something inside of you that causes you pain, don't do it. I can live without them if you stay and show me."

He smiled, "you mean that?"

"I mean it," I said softly. "I love you. I don't want you to hurt over this."

He smiled and hugged me to him tightly, "you have no idea how much it means to me that you say that," he sighed in my ear. "But I meant what I said. I'm going to be able to say the words to the bean. I want to say them to you." He swallowed, "I need to say them to you."

"I love you," I whispered and relaxed on his big body.

"Do you think this is what the doctor meant by intimacy," he smiled.

"Maybe," I said softly as I kissed down his neck, "but…maybe it would be okay to be more intimate."

"Maybe," he smiled.

I rolled off of him. "I love you," I said and reached down to tug my shirt over my head. "You can't say the words yet, but you can show me."

He groaned.

"I'll say it and you do it," I said as I tossed my jeans aside.

"Are you sure," he said rolling over and pinning me to the mattress.

"I'm sure."

"Well…can we agree that we both show it? I need a little participation here."

I grinned. "Trust me Ricardo…you're going to get all the participation you can handle."

"Now that," he said as his shirt joined mine on the floor, "is what I'm talking about."