HELLO MY FAITHFULS! How are you all? Because I'm pretty great! I found out recently that my writing received awards in a competition, so that was a "alkjdfhnalskfdjhafas" type of moment. It was at the regional level, and national results come back soon, so I'm praying that you'll keep your fingers crossed for me. I'm sooooo nervous, and it's still like a month away. In other words, I am an impatient person, and waiting is not fun. Anyways...

IF YOU TOOK THE STEP TO PUT OUT YOUR INSECURITIES, PLEASE CHECK YOUR PM INBOX. I'VE LEFT A SURPRISE!

(Now on with the story)

CLARY POV

I woke up in someone's arms. That fact had hit me the second I'd become conscious, and I didn't quite know what to do. The even bigger problem was that I wasn't awake enough to have any idea of who was even holding me. What I did process was that it felt good. My own revelation had come as a surprise to even myself, because I'd never by any means been a cuddler. Then again, it might've been because I'd never had anyone to truly cuddle with. So all in all, I'd figured out that I liked it, and that was about as far as my mind could go at this no doubt ungodly hour of the morning.

In all honesty, I didn't want to move. I didn't want to stop the warmth that was wrapping around me, even though it could technically be anyone's arms giving me said warmth. Well, anyone who had strong arms, a muscled chest, and smelled like mangos. The last thing made me pause. There was a niggling feeling in my brain whispering that it should be a hint. I rolled the word around in my mind, my sleep fogged thoughts attempting to clear. What came with mangos? I had no idea-

Shit.

The name popped into my head, hitting me like a freight train. I was currently snuggling with Jace.

I was freaking snuggling with Jonathan Christopher Lightwood.

Again, shit.

The first question that entered my mind was Why? A sane Clary Fray and a sane Jace Lightwood would never do this in a million years, so what had caused this impromptu intimacy? I ignored the fact that I was making no move to change our current position as I searched for some memory, some indication, of how we got here. The last thing I barely remembered was possibly feeling him put up a pillow barrier, which meant we wouldn't have gotten on the same side. There had to be a time that we'd woken up.

I suddenly gasped, as the night came back to me, and I tightened my already closed eyes. It had been months since I'd had those nightmares, but of course they had to come back when I was having a slumber party with Jace. Because the world was totally on my side like that. Then, the rest of everything that had happened filtered through my thick skull.

Jace had helped me. Jace had made an honest to God effort to help me, and somehow, he'd succeeded. I briefly questioned if there was some sort of ulterior motive, but what would it be? He hadn't made fun of me for being a cry baby, and he hadn't even made a single noise of disgust when we'd touched. It was beyond weird, as was the light feeling that began to bloom in my heart.

Then, I had another epiphany. There would be consequences.

You see, whenever Jace did something nice, something that would tip the scales even the slightest bit, he overcompensated to get it back to where it had been before. So, if he made a genuine effort and went as far as cuddling me, the aftershocks would be nothing but horrible. At least I had time to prepare myself. And time to get out of his arms, hopefully avoiding what would be one of the most awkward moments of my life. At least, last night, I had been in a state of mind I couldn't be blamed for. Now, it was a different story.

I swallowed hard, contemplating how I would do this without waking him up. Truly, he was such a deep sleeper that anything I did would most likely be fair game, or so I hoped. With that in mind, I took a shaky breath, gently beginning to wiggle back. I was almost out of his embrace when he mumbled something indiscernible in his sleep. Then, the oddest thing happened.

He pulled me back, proceeding to bury his face in my neck. I held my breath, wishing with all my heart that he wasn't actually waking up. Apparently, the universe gave me a gift, because after that, he didn't show any signs of awareness. The problem was that he wasn't about to let go. I was afraid that, if I pushed too hard, even he would awaken, and that would be bad. Very bad. A part of me didn't want to leave though. It was a thought that, as soon as I identified it, I squashed into oblivion, because I should never want to be this close to Jace for even a second.

With a newfound determination, I squirmed until his arms were forced to loosen. I had no idea how he was sleeping through all of this, but it was a blessing that I wasn't about to question. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, I was free. I rolled off of the bed and onto my feet, letting out a breath of relief, then checked the clock that sat by his bed. As soon as I saw the time, I resisted the urge to groan.

5:30

I crossed my arms, tapping my foot against the floor as I weighed my options. The worst, yet most tempting, option was to get back in bed, stay on my side, and act like nothing happened. With that came the risk of Jace grabbing me again. Option two was to go downstairs, make a shitload of coffee, and pray that I would make it through the day without falling asleep in class. I huffed out a breath when I realized that there really was no choice. Option two was the only way to go, so I huffed out an annoyed breath, marching downstairs. Even though no one would see it, I pouted, silently cursing and blessing Jace at the same time.

If I was being fair, I should honestly thank him for what he'd done, because that must've taken a lot. He had to have known that his pride would be knocked down a notch, but he did it anyways. I mean, what would happen if word got out that he'd held hands with Clary Fray, much less snuggle with her? Neither of us would speak a word about it-or so I expected-so that wouldn't necessarily be a problem. At least, I wouldn't, but there was a big chance that he would mock me for crying like a baby over a nightmare. I flinched at the mere thought, because that would be too far, even for him. Then again, he had no idea how serious it was, so he might treat it just like anything else.

The thing I was terrified of most was Isabelle finding out. I knew for a fact that she would be worried to no end. Then, she would be watching me like a hawk for the next eternity, and neither of us needed that. I hoped that, for the sake of the cuddling secret, Jace wouldn't mention it in front of her at all, but with him, there was a possibility of anything. My sigh was the only thing that shattered the silence as I began the process of making coffee. As soon as I was done, I plopped down on a barstool at the kitchen counter, burying my face in my hands.

It seemed like an eternity before a beep signaled that the drink of the gods had been brewed, and I moved sluggishly to prepare the rest of the drink. Then, I sat down again, mug in hand, and sipped the scalding liquid. It was almost hot enough to burn my tongue, but not quite. In other words, it was perfect. I didn't know how long I was sitting there before I heard the padding of feet on the wooden floor, and I turned to find Jace standing in front of me, a slight frown on his face. I hadn't expected much, but actually seeing him like that after what had happened hurt the tiniest bit.

I lifted my hand in a half hearted greeting, but all he did was snort and roll his eyes, walking over to the cupboard. My lips tipped down at the corners.

"You're welcome." I muttered as he poured himself a mug of my coffee. He barked out a laugh, turning to face me again.

"I'm not the one who should be thankful." Both his words and his smirk held a cold distance that made me swallow hard. There was something coming next, something bad. I could tell by the way his eyes lit up in the most evil way, "Next time, do me a favor and suck it up. I already have one crying baby to deal with, and I don't need another one." I didn't expect to feel the pain I did, so the way my heart seemed to crack took me off guard. My jaw dropped, but all he did was roll his eyes yet again.

Then, he walked right past me, without a word, to whatever the hell room he wanted, leaving me shocked and in the dust.

JACE POV

I groaned as my alarm went off, blindly smacking at it until I hit the right button to turn it off. After a minute of self-motivation, I cracked open an eye. The other quickly followed, and I reluctantly yawned, sitting up and stretching my arms. For a second, I stayed there, because something tugged at my mind. It was the strangest feeling, like I should remember something that was just out of reach. I glanced to my side, seeing the impression of a body on my bed, and a crease formed between my eyebrows.

Who was in my bed?

I thought back to the night before, knowing that I hadn't brought a girl home, but how would that have gotten there. Then, the night came crashing back to me, and I sucked in a sharp breath, my eyes widening. Clary was the one who had been in my bed. Clary Fray had been in my bed. I groaned, realizing the destruction that simple sentence would bring. If that got out, I was done for by Isabelle, and that was something I would rather avoid.

Next, the middle of the night came back. I groaned, burying my face in my hands. What the hell was I thinking? What I should've done was either ignored it or scared her awake then gone back to sleep. There was the tiniest part of me that spoke up, though. It was a part that, even though I didn't want to acknowledge it, I had to hear.

Even I'm not that cruel.

It was true. No person with a heart could've left someone-even someone they despised-alone like that. It just wasn't humane. Then again, I didn't have to go as far as I did. At the most, I should've patted her on the shoulder and told her that everything would be okay. But of course I didn't do that. Instead, I decided to cross every line that had ever been drawn between us. I decided to snuggle her, something I didn't even do with the girls I brought to bed.

Also, because there just had to be more, I'd thought about her a way I never had before. It must've just been a sleep induced haze, because there was no way I could even consider Fray like that. Still, I couldn't deny what I'd felt. Even though I wasn't romantic, it was something taboo. It was something that should never be repeated, even in my mind.

And God I didn't like it. I didn't like the way I held her. I didn't like the way she fit against me. I didn't like the warmth I felt when she snuggled back.

I didn't like where this train of thought was going either.

A deep sigh escaped me, and I wondered what in the world to do. I could act like nothing had happened, but that wouldn't be enough. There was still a chance that she would think something was changing, which wasn't true. The night didn't mean anything to me, and hopefully to her. The briefest flash of question crossed my mind, but it wasn't about her. It was whether or not I was trying to convince myself more than anything else. As soon as I identified it, I did everything in my power to dismiss it, but for some reason, it lingered.

It got to the point of where I literally shook my head to rid myself of whatever was going on inside my head, because even entertaining thoughts like those was dangerous. It would bring nothing but problems, and it shouldn't have even happened in the first place. Just like the hug. Just like the holding hands. Just like the snuggling. If I could go back in time, I would've made better choices, safer choices.

Would you really? My mind decided to chime in at the best moment possible. Note the sarcasm. I blinked hard, almost like I was trying to unsee the night, but that wasn't possible. It had already been engraved in stone. But you can still scratch it out. My brain supplied, for once being helpful. That was something I could manage. I could scratch and scrape until it was unrecognizable, no trace of anything that had happened. A steely resolve rose up in me as I realized that it was the only thing I could do. There was no other way to erase what I had done.

With that in mind, I threw the sheets off of me, walking downstairs with a new goal in mind. I knew she was in the kitchen, so before I entered, I took a deep breath, forcing my face to be impassive. Then, I decided to go a step further by letting a frown pull at the corners of my lips. As soon as my eyes landed on her, I stopped. She looked tired, even from behind. Just the way she sat suggested that she was beyond exhausted. I was pulled out of my thoughts when she turned around, lifting her hand in the slightest wave. A part of me wanted to wave back, but I shoved that part to the furthest, darkest corner of my mind.

Instead, I opted to snort and roll my eyes, moving past her and honing in on the freshly brewed pot of coffee. Without a single word, I grabbed a mug, filling it with the heavenly drink.

"You're welcome." She mumbled, just loud enough for me to hear, and I forced myself to bark out a laugh.

"I'm not the one who should be thankful." I stated, a fake smirk forming on my face. Then, I had the epiphany that just that statement wasn't enough. I had to say something that would leave an impression, something that would turn everything back to how it had always been. The next words fell naturally off of my tongue, and they quickly brought a sense of normalcy back to me, "Next time, do me a favor and suck it up. I already have one crying baby to deal with, and I don't need another one."

I thought she would raise her eyebrows and scoff, so when I saw the flash of hurt in her eyes, it took me off guard. Her jaw dropped, and for the first time, she didn't fire back. It made me question whether or not I had gone too far, but then again, when had I ever really considered her feelings? I tried to drill that in my head as I rolled my eyes, waltzing out of the room. To be honest, I had no idea where I was going. All I knew was that I needed to get out of there. I needed to get away from the look on her face, because if I didn't, I would regret my words, and that would just bring me back to square one.

What is wrong with you? My mind hissed, You've always done this to her, so what's the problem now?

Then, it occurred to me that it wasn't because I liked her in any sense of the word. It was because I'm a human being, so if I even had the slightest bit of a heart, I would at least be cordial to her after what had happened.

It was just a nightmare. Jesus, what is up with you today? I tried to tell myself, but there was a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach that whispered that it was more than just a trivial nightmare. Clary Fray wasn't the type to show weakness just because of a bad dream, so there was obviously something I was missing. I focused on that rather than the slight regret that was growing in me, and a determination quickly took over me.

I needed to find out what the hell that was about. Not because I really cared, but because I was out of the loop. I didn't like knowing that there was a secret I wasn't let in on, even if that secret belonged to Fray. I kept that running through my brain as I turned on heel, moving back into the kitchen. When I walked in, Clary's head was in her arms, which were folded on the counter.

"Leave." Was all she said, not even bothering to look up.

"Not until you tell me what last night was about." I replied, clearly not obeying her command. She didn't groan. She didn't huff. She just sighed, lapsing into silence, "Come on, Shortcake." I hoped the nickname would annoy her enough even to just look at me, but it didn't work, "Strawberry?" I tried. Still no response, "Chili Pepper?" Still, it was to no avail. Another name was about to roll off my tongue, but something cut me off.

"Good morning!" Isabelle sang as she practically skipped into the room. I turned to her, my eyes asking how in the hell she could be so energetic at this hour. Then again, she always seemed to be awake at even the latest-or earliest-of times, "Oh cheer up." I expected it to be directed at Clary, but instead, she was looking at me.

"I'm not the one who needs to cheer up." I muttered, gesturing behind me to Fray. To my surprise, Izzy just raised an eyebrow.

"What's wrong with her?" She asked, making me confused. How could she not see that there was something wrong with her best friend. I whipped around, only to be met with the sight of a slightly smiling Clary. Her elbow was on the table, propping up her chin, which rested in her hand. There was amusement dancing in her irises, or so it seemed. It was a facade. It had to be a facade. I opened my mouth, about to call her out on it, when a barely visible trace of fear flickered across her face. She shook her head the slightest bit, and had I not been paying such close attention, I wouldn't have caught it.

I was faced with a choice.

I could snitch, or I could keep it between us.

Then, I realized that, if I told Isabelle about the nightmare, it would bring up a lot of questions I couldn't answer without causing a disaster.

"Everything." I finally responded, and Iz snorted.

"Whatever you say." Clary chimed in, "Whatever you say."

But I didn't miss the grateful note in her tone.

Sooooooo... Did you guys like it? Because I did ;) Jace's reaction was a given, because he couldn't just change in a snap. No, our poor little sweet Jacey-poo has to go through some state of denial. Actually, a lot of states of denial. I'm sorry, but I'm going to make you suffer. Actually, I'm not that sorry, because when writing tortures you, that means it has made an impact, and I'm pretty good with that ;) WELP HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND MY FAITHFULS. LOVE TO YOU ALL

-Shadowhunter5801