About six years ago
"I cannot believe I am going on a date at my age," I say to Sidda. I tug at my shirt. Yoon-Gi said it was a very casual restaurant, so I wear my normal, skinny jeans, and long sleeved thermal with a Harley Quinn t-shirt over it. "Momma, you are not that old, you are only 42. And Yoon-Gi has been in love with you for at least a year. This is all silly. You love him too." I hang my head. How is me going on a date not a slap in the face to Kayden? "I wish you would just let yourself love him. It's ok you know," she whispers. I nod. "I do know. It hasn't changed the rest." I look up, looking at her through the mirror I am facing. "I'm going on the date, aren't I?" She smiles and yawns. I turn toward her. "Yea, it's about time, she mutters."
"Tired?" I ask. "Yea. I think I am still jet-lagged even though I slept for 12 hours. I even missed half of my first class." I laugh. I told you to take a flight a few days beforehand." "Yea, I know. But I don't listen." She stretches back on my bed. She has grown into such an amazing woman. She is in her last year to become an Art teacher. She has gotten used to the new routine, but I know it was hard on my girls to make the changes they did in the last few months.
"Hey," I ask. Sidda opens her eyes and looks at me questioning. "Tell me the truth. Is everyone settling ok? Your sisters? I know it is such a huge change." She sits up on one elbow. "Yea, it was hardest for Rose, I think, still being in high school, but they both love it here too. Nova is still struggling with the language, but the people at the university are beneficial to us both." I nod. "Good, I want you all to be comfortable."
"We are," she yawns.
After coming to South Korea a fair amount of times over the last year and a half I, well, all of us really, fell in love with everything. So three months ago I decided to move here. Rose, at 17, was the only one who had to come with me. She wouldn't turn 18 until after she graduates high school, so there was not an option. I told Nova and Sidda that since our house back in the States was completely paid off that they could stay there to finish college as long as they took care of the bills and the house. They both decided they wanted to come too, which made me very happy. It's been the girls and me for a long time now.
"Momma!" I hear Nova call from downstairs. "Yea?" I call back, standing and checking my watch. It's still 30 minutes until Yoon-Gi said he'd be here to pick me up. I look at Sidda and say, "Will you make sure Rose doesn't stay up too late playing games with Jimin, please?" She nods, "Of course, Momma." "Thank you, my baby. I love you," I say and go out the door and down the narrow steps. "Nova?" I ask, looking around. The front door is closed, and I am not sure which side she called from, the living area to the left or the kitchen to the right. "Kitchen," I hear Rose call. I turn to the right and go down the short hall to the kitchen. "What's up?" I ask. I walk into the kitchen and look towards the breakfast bar, their favorite place to hang out before ending their night.
I see Rose and Nova sitting on the stools with Jimin in the background rummaging through the refrigerator. Jimin turns and says, "I'm sorry, noona. I was so hungry." I roll my eyes. "Jimin, you might as well live here, I don't care." He smiles and grabs some leftover tteokbokki. "It's a bit spicier than you normally would like it," I warn. "It's ok," he says, grabbing a pair of chopsticks and coming to sit next to Nova to eat.
"Ok, so what's up?" I repeat, looking at the three of them. "Jimin was just telling us something funny about practice today, is all," Rose says, smiling. I cross my arms. "Yea?" Jimin turns away. "And I bet it has something to do with Yoon-Gi and our date, huh?" I smile at the thought. Nova snickers. "Yea, something along the lines of how you haven't stopped talking about it all day, apparently neither has Yoon-Gi." I flush and look down. The girls begin to laugh. I can't help but smile along with them. "Look at Momma's face," I hear Rose say. "I know, it's almost painful to watch. Momma, is this how you felt when we went on our first dates?" Nova asked. I snicker. "Probably." "You two stop messing with your mother. It's not respectful," Jimin says between bites. I look at the three of them. Sometimes they all act like actual siblings instead of Jimin adopting us when he was 25. He's 14 years older than Rose, but after Kayden passed away, they formed a bond that seems stronger than brother and sister. It took him no time at all to start telling everyone they were his little sisters. "Thank you, Jimin. They seem to forget that as they get older." I go over to the kitchen and load the few things from the sink into the dishwasher.
"Oh, Momma," Sidda says from the doorway. "Huh?" I ask, reaching for Jimin's bowl to rinse and add to the dishes. He waves my hand away and comes over, does it himself. "Marie called earlier while you were at work. She'll be here on the 30th." I nod, "I knew she'd come quicker than she said. She loves it here almost as much as I do. I bet you she doesn't leave either. She said something about looking for a job during our last conversation." My sister was thrilled when I said we were moving to Seoul. I brought her here the first time when she was 17 and, just like me, she fell in love.
"Your sister is coming for a visit?" Jimin asks coming to stand beside me. I turn and look at his face; he has that mischievous look. "Yea. She'll be here about two months," I answer, raising my eyebrow. His smile widens. "Oh, she's celebrating her birthday here?" I nod, "Yes, my dad and the boys will be here closer to their birthday. I think I'll take them on the Sea train." "I cannot wait to tell Jung-kook, and she'll be here for his birthday too," Jimin says under his breath. "What?" I say. Since Marie is 15 years younger than me, I am just as protective over her as I am my daughters.
"Oh my god, Mom," Nova says from her seat. I can almost hear her eyes roll. "Kook has had a crush on Marie FOREVER. You are so blind to be so observant." I feel my eyebrow furrow. "I won't tell him if you don't want me to, noona. I'll even tell him to back off if you want me too," Jimin says, misinterpreting my look. I smile softly at him, "No need for that. My looks were for my daughters choice of words, not the information on Kook. I knew he used to have a crush on her, but isn't he seeing someone right now? Su-ji?"
"Not anymore. They didn't have much in common and didn't get along very well," Jimin answers. Just then the bell rings. Except for glancing at the clock, I find myself frozen. "It's Yoon-Gi-Hyung," Jimin says. "He is always on time." All eyes turn to me. I feel my face flush again.
"I'll get the door, you guys unthaw Momma," Rose says, hopping up. Sidda smiles a smile that should belong to someone older than her 23 years. Nova stands and smiles at me too. Jimin throws his arm around my shoulders. "I do not understand why you and hyung are acting this way. It's been clear to the hyungs and me that Yoon-Gi developed feelings for you long before he admitted it to himself. And you care for us all, but you have a special bond with him. I can see it each time you look at him. The love in your eyes is so clear." I smile at him, he's such a sweet person, he's so good at making you feel better no matter what. "Well, that was easy," Nova says, clapping her hands together, "Thanks Jimin. I'm not good at the touchy-feely, kinda like my Mom." She winks at me. Sidda keeps smiling, content and relief on her face.
We hear Rose and Yoon-Gi talking at the front door. Our apartment in Seoul is not very big, so it's very evident when others are near. "Rose, are you well?" we hear Yoon-Gi asking, talking in standard Korean. He knows she is still shaky on the different dialects from the country, so her refrains from using them very much when speaking directly to her. "Yes, Yoon-gi-ssi. I love my studies. They are much more interesting here than back home," she answers. Their voices are growing close. "You are getting much better at your Korean, good job. Do you eat enough at school?" he asks as they come into view. I cannot help but smile. His face never fails to put a smile on my face. When he is serious, he sticks his full bottom lip out slightly making him look like he is pouting. In these times he also throws in his satoori tone, making him words sound gruff. Today he has his hands behind his back as he concentrates on what Rose is saying. I let my eyes trail down and let out a small huff when I see that we have dressed similarly — jeans, baggy t-shirt over a more fitted long sleeved one. "Yes, they have such a wonderful selection, so I eat well. Thank you." She replies to him, looking up at me and smiling.
Yoon-Gi's eyes follow hers and meet mine. He also smiles and says, "Leigh. You look beautiful." I snort. "You do too, seeing how we dressed exactly alike." This side I never have trouble showing to Yoon-Gi. We have very similar personalities, and he's always loved that I don't hesitate to say what is on my mind. He looks at my outfit. "That we did." His eyes slide to the left of me to where Jimin is, arm still around my shoulders. His eyes narrow just a bit, the way they always do when he sees one of the guys casually touching me. I used to find it irritating, but lately, I kinda think it's cute. "Jimin, I should have known you'd be here. Raiding Leigh's fridge again?" Jimin removes his arm and smiles at his brother.
"Leigh cooks very well and doesn't fuss if I eat what I want. And I wanted to help Rose with her work if she had any, like a good big brother," Jimin says in his classic pout. "Honestly, Yoon-Gi, I love having Jimin over. He almost always has a sense joy surrounding him and he puts me at ease," I comment. Yoon-Gi smirks and Jimin smiles. "He has a way of doing that." Yoon-Gi motions toward the front door. "Shall we?" I clasp my hands together and nod, following him to the shoe nook. We both pull on our boots in silence.
"You two look so funny," Nova says, watching us from the kitchen doorway. "Momma, stop being weird. It's Yoon, you've known him for years. He's the one who got you talking and smiling again." I smile at her. "You're right." I grab my bag off the hook and pat my pocket to be sure my phone is there. "Good night all," I call into the house. "Rose, do not stay up late, you have school tomorrow. Jimin, you are welcome to stay the night if you do not want to take the bus home later. The spare bedroom is already made up for you." I hear Sidda call, "Night, Momma." Rose calls, "Alright, Mom, I know." Then Jimin, "Thank you, noona!" I smile towards their voices. "Have a good time tonight, Momma. We're fine. Stop worrying," Nova says. "Good night, Nova," Yoon-Gi says, opening the door for me. I step out of the door and wait on the small sidewalk for Yoon-Gi to meet me.